What nobody tells you about losing weight
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I don't keep a lot of hyper palatable, convenience foods in the house, for my own sake. I live alone so it's just easier to only have eggs and vegetables and whatnot that I enjoy, but aren't easy to just grab.
But man, I got a cold this week, and being congested just kills the appeal of foods. Smell is such an important part of eating to me. I kind of wish I had some hyper palatable foods in the house to help me get my calories in, because everything else is just coming off as meh and not being able to smell the eggs I'm cooking kills my appetite.15 -
lawsonsaysread wrote: »At 200 lbs down, I find the following surprising-
-How much I HATE being told I am inspiring or having the talk about "How did you loose all the weight?" Those conversations just make me want to go binge on Reece's Peanut Butter Eggs. When strangers comment on my fitness level, I feel uplifted. When people I know (even family) comment on weight loss, I feel judged. When a mere acquaintance tells me thy are "proud" of me, I want to get violent. It is kind of funny because I do not care about other people's judgments except in this area. I do not care what anyone (other than my wife and daughter) thinks about how I dress, my old truck, my taste in literature, my love of classical music, my nerdy side, my redneck side, my political perspectives, my ignorance of pop culture, my income, etc. But hearing what someone (and everyone seems to think they need to comment) thinks/feels about my weight loss makes me feel like crap. This is a problem in me, not other people, but, oh my, it has surprised me how intense this is.
Congratulations on your successful weight loss!
And old trucks are the best!
I hear what you are saying about being uncomfortable addressing weight-loss comments but I think your angst is may be a bit short-sighted.
I believe we will be experiencing much more openess in society talking about weight loss and gain and everything surrounding that issue.
30 years ago, you never mentioned someones fat in front of them. If you had to describe people, they were hefty, husky, big boned. It was almost a taboo subject seen as very negative almost as bad as a drug habit, etc.
We as a WORLD society have become obese.
Yes, there are places and people that still deal with chronic hungar but society as a whole has been doing a great job of ‘eating away’ at the problem of people dying of starvation.
In fact, mankind has developed the ability (in creating a corn ‘food-product industry’ ) to feed the world now!
It’s a matter of getting the food to those last hungry places.
That being said- The World is now dealing with an obesity problem.
IMO, The current social conversation needs to address it at a high level and even more important the next generation needs to be given the tools in school to learn about choosing the right diet for a healthy life in both the classroom and lunch table.
I was fat at the start of my journey. I might as well admit it to myself because everyone else knew it.
I remember even shocking a few people saying it out loud, as in -
Since I am fat....
‘I am going to lose weight, workout, start watching my diet, research the current related medical information, etc.
Others around me are also fat... not putting them down, just making an accurate judgement.
However, they are not mentally at that place of starting this journey yet (even if they need to be for their own health and lifes sake)
The conversation of us discussing my weight-loss because I was fat is safe because as I share my journey maybe they think they can start theirs. I am still fatter than I need to be, at least to be as fit and healthy as I want.
When family and friends comment or say they are proud of me it shows me they are emotionally invested in my well being enough to care to comment. They are thinking it anyway and I would rather know than not know.
Of course, there are also those insincere people, who say it without really meaning it. Maybe your hackles were raised by that aspect?
At any rate, I believe society as a whole will be talking more and more about fat and weight loss as a higher and higher percentage of our population struggles being seriously overweight and obese. We even have levels of obesity now because what used to be the highest and rarest level of fat is now a common living space for so many people.
Just know that in some cases, whether you like or or not, your example makes others look at themselves and some are seriously, maybe even desperately searching for a bridge to start that journey.
Maybe develop a few truthful comebacks to the common comments that annoy you that could be helpful to someone else.
Those comments may be annoying simply because you don’t know how to respond because you have never had to before.
Maybe interpret the words a bit different.
Proud= impressed
Losing weight = fitness level
You can never go wrong by just graciously saying thank you.
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On feeling cold alot-
I have noticed lately that my feeling cold has more to do with diet rather than fat loss.
I recently switched back to full fat dairy (milk, cottage cheese, sour cream, yogurt) instead of fat-free stuff and noticed not only more satiability for longer but also feeling warmer and having a higher energy level.
And sugarized corn product and by product foods are very high energy.
I believe this is one major aspect to society’s food choices of chips over salad.
Although salad makes you feel healthy and full of vitality, corn product has a different warm, full belly feeling.
Knowing that, I have started looking for healthy foods that accomplish the same feeling.
So far beans seem like the best healthy substitute especially if eaten hot.
For those not allergic, Nuts are also higher energy and well digestable although not a full belly food.14 -
Just know that in some cases, whether you like or or not, your example makes others look at themselves and some are seriously, maybe even desperately searching for a bridge to start that journey.
Maybe develop a few truthful comebacks to the common comments that annoy you that could be helpful to someone else.
Typically most people don't really want the answers though. They want you to say "I was on this diet, or took this miracle pill". When you say "I ate less and got more exercise", they literally tune out, or they think you're keeping secrets.. or they just want to bag on your method of doing it.
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With only 5 pounds left to a BMi of 23.0, my stomach is still too big..... Ahhh.18
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I’m really really grateful to be at a healthy weight, with normal A1C.
But at age 50 after losing 31 pounds my wrinkles are more visible! Has anyone experienced this? Should I moisturize? Drink more water?
Yes, and be patient... given time, SOME of the increase in wrinkle action goes away... I had a neck wattle form after the first 25 pounds came off... I feared, greatly, that I would have a wattle down to my belly button before it was all said and done - but, thank Heaven, the wattle has stayed fairly consistent - although I have lost another 50 pounds.14 -
I do our HOA’s weekly newsletter. As a favor for a friend, I inserted an ad for her weight loss hypnotherapy program. She’s had several neighbors sign up since Friday. I don’t know which is more amusing. That they noticed, or that they think that was my “magic pill”. Does this mean I’m now a social influencer? LMAO!14
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It feels uncomfortable when people don’t say anything about my weight loss.
And it feels uncomfortable when people comment on my weight loss.
Which tells me it’s just about my own insecurities. Same as when I was overweight.45 -
Until I started this journey in way back when, I didn't realize how many ups and downs there can be -- a lot of it came from outside stress/unhappiness with life or work, and my drive for weight loss just plummeted.
I've tried paleo and keto WOE, but this time I'm kind of back to the basics: calories in < calories out. And I'm implementing a lot more weight into my routines instead of mostly cardio. Didn't realize how excited I get with an extra 5 pounds on those dumbbells! I think this is helping my drive to continue.
Final thought for today -- no one ever told me that there were so many other people with the same physical insecurities as me -- even people I think look fantastic. I'm not the only one fighting myself to wear a dress I think looks great in my bathroom mirror, but I hate in a group photo. Power to you all!32 -
Last time I lost weight I noticed I had to stop saying fat jokes. ( they were always against myself)18
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smiliekiwi wrote: »Last time I lost weight I noticed I had to stop saying fat jokes. ( they were always against myself)
I never even thought of this. It's not self-deprecation anymore!10 -
I remember seeing post on Facebook where Reese Witherspoon posted a picture of a piece of bacon, 1 egg and a piece of toast, saying "I'm having a huge breakfast today" and I thought.."That's only half a breakfast"..now I eat that and am full...LOL..your perspective changes A LOT26
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smiliekiwi wrote: »Last time I lost weight I noticed I had to stop saying fat jokes. ( they were always against myself)
Boy, ain’t that the truth. I can’t even count how many times I joked about my fat *kitten* being in the way or something. Always trying to downplay the fact that it was indeed. Fat and in the way.
And I did the thing today that others have mentioned. Pressed myself against a wall to give someone room to get past, and then realized from their odd expression how funny I must have looked.18 -
This has been mentioned already, but I didn’t realize people would think they should tell me I had lost “enough.”
When you’re finally in a size 12 and you hear that, you know you’re doing something right AND you also learn a lot about other people’s character, agenda and insecurities.
(My response, the last time it happened, was to act alarmed and ask if she’d let my doctor know he needed to reconsider his opinion that I still needed to lose twenty pounds to reach a healthy weight. Then I urged her to hurry to the nearest clothing store and demand that all items smaller than a twelve be removed for the safety of their customers, who should avoid getting any smaller. 🙄😏😜 To my great disappointment, not really, she doesn’t speak to me anymore. Maybe I was too aggressive, but she needs to think twice before saying something so silly to another mere acquaintance.)28 -
SalinitySally wrote: »This has been mentioned already, but I didn’t realize people would think they should tell me I had lost “enough.”
When you’re finally in a size 12 and you hear that, you know you’re doing something right AND you also learn a lot about other people’s character, agenda and insecurities.
(My response, the last time it happened, was to act alarmed and ask if she’d let my doctor know he needed to reconsider his opinion that I still needed to lose twenty pounds to reach a healthy weight. Then I urged her to hurry to the nearest clothing store and demand that all items smaller than a twelve be removed for the safety of their customers, who should avoid getting any smaller. 🙄😏😜 To my great disappointment, not really, she doesn’t speak to me anymore. Maybe I was too aggressive, but she needs to think twice before saying something so silly to another mere acquaintance.)
That's hilarious!! I love it!! I wish I was that quick and brave with comebacks!9 -
SalinitySally wrote: »
My response, the last time it happened, was to act alarmed and ask if she’d let my doctor know he needed to reconsider his opinion that I still needed to lose twenty pounds to reach a healthy weight. Then I urged her to hurry to the nearest clothing store and demand that all items smaller than a twelve be removed for the safety of their customers, who should avoid getting any smaller. 🙄😏😜 To my great disappointment, not really, she doesn’t speak to me anymore. Maybe I was too aggressive, but she needs to think twice before saying something so silly to another mere acquaintance.
😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂
You rock! Nope, you were no way aggressive. You were justified to be that awesomely sarcastic!
I have a sister who almost convinced my mum (during my first weightloss journey) that me at size 10 is unhealthy and I was suffering an eating disorder. Doesn't matter we're the same height, I was 5kg heavier than her and have similar bodies. My response to her was similar to yours. I too no longer speak to her. Apparently I'm too sarcastic...go figure...
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This is new, turns out that I can comfortably wear high heels. I had been convinced that my old feet just couldn't do it. No, my atrophied muscles couldn't do it. Now, I can. Those squats, lunges, step ups, and Romanian deadlifts strengthened my legs big time.33
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I’m sure this has been said here many times...
But i had no idea how awkward it would be for people to talk about your weight loss and ask how much you’ve lost. It makes me so uncomfortable any time someone compliments me.17 -
amdev23_23 wrote: »I’m sure this has been said here many times...
But i had no idea how awkward it would be for people to talk about your weight loss and ask how much you’ve lost. It makes me so uncomfortable any time someone compliments me.
I'm with you on that, I'm so proud of myself but the second someone says something I become so awkward when we should be revelling in it!14 -
...the amount of money you will spend on new clothes.
I calculate I bought about six whole new wardrobes during the course of my weight loss. Even with charity shops, that got expensive.
But what I didn't anticipate is how much I'm still spending on clothes now I'm at my final size.
First there was the 'this is my final size, I can buy good clothes that will last' splurge. Then there was the 'hey, I don't have to hide my tummy anymore, I can buy styles I never even looked at before' splurge. Then there was the 'holy *kitten* what is this "cold" malarkey, now I understand why people have a separate winter wardrobe' splurge. Then there was the 'wait, I can wear designer clothes now' splurge.
Help, help, I think I've become a fashion victim...
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Same!!! lol I need a bigger closet...the amount of money you will spend on new clothes.
I calculate I bought about six whole new wardrobes during the course of my weight loss. Even with charity shops, that got expensive.
But what I didn't anticipate is how much I'm still spending on clothes now I'm at my final size.
First there was the 'this is my final size, I can buy good clothes that will last' splurge. Then there was the 'hey, I don't have to hide my tummy anymore, I can buy styles I never even looked at before' splurge. Then there was the 'holy *kitten* what is this "cold" malarkey, now I understand why people have a separate winter wardrobe' splurge. Then there was the 'wait, I can wear designer clothes now' splurge.
Help, help, I think I've become a fashion victim...
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Food still has the ability to give me horrible gas even when I'm not over my calorie goal. It's not just eating too much that can cause stomach issues, and I realized that quite clearly this weekend. One must work up to eating decent amounts of kimchi if one hasn't had it before - even though it is delicious and quite easy to eat half a jar.22
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...the amount of money you will spend on new clothes.
I calculate I bought about six whole new wardrobes during the course of my weight loss. Even with charity shops, that got expensive.
But what I didn't anticipate is how much I'm still spending on clothes now I'm at my final size.
First there was the 'this is my final size, I can buy good clothes that will last' splurge. Then there was the 'hey, I don't have to hide my tummy anymore, I can buy styles I never even looked at before' splurge. Then there was the 'holy *kitten* what is this "cold" malarkey, now I understand why people have a separate winter wardrobe' splurge. Then there was the 'wait, I can wear designer clothes now' splurge.
Help, help, I think I've become a fashion victim...
Not to mention the amount of money I've spent on cycling clothes, running shoes, etc...15 -
garystrickland357 wrote: »...the amount of money you will spend on new clothes.
I calculate I bought about six whole new wardrobes during the course of my weight loss. Even with charity shops, that got expensive.
But what I didn't anticipate is how much I'm still spending on clothes now I'm at my final size.
First there was the 'this is my final size, I can buy good clothes that will last' splurge. Then there was the 'hey, I don't have to hide my tummy anymore, I can buy styles I never even looked at before' splurge. Then there was the 'holy *kitten* what is this "cold" malarkey, now I understand why people have a separate winter wardrobe' splurge. Then there was the 'wait, I can wear designer clothes now' splurge.
Help, help, I think I've become a fashion victim...
Not to mention the amount of money I've spent on cycling clothes, running shoes, etc...
I am not even thinking about that. Not when I have a tendency to discover that my gym clothes are slightly too big just before a high-impact class, and the nearest place to buy emergency leggings is Sweaty Betty...10 -
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...the amount of money you will spend on new clothes.
I calculate I bought about six whole new wardrobes during the course of my weight loss. Even with charity shops, that got expensive.
But what I didn't anticipate is how much I'm still spending on clothes now I'm at my final size.
First there was the 'this is my final size, I can buy good clothes that will last' splurge. Then there was the 'hey, I don't have to hide my tummy anymore, I can buy styles I never even looked at before' splurge. Then there was the 'holy *kitten* what is this "cold" malarkey, now I understand why people have a separate winter wardrobe' splurge. Then there was the 'wait, I can wear designer clothes now' splurge.
Help, help, I think I've become a fashion victim...
This. Plus, I enjoy shopping for clothes. Which is something I never thought I'd enjoy doing!10 -
dhiammarath wrote: »
This. Plus, I enjoy shopping for clothes. Which is something I never thought I'd enjoy doing!
I’m starting back, and shopping for clothes is something that genuinely both motivates me and fills me with anxiety. I know it sounds ridiculous, but my current wardrobe is from like, 3-4 stores and has been for years. I look at all the stores *I will* be able to choose from and I get anxious - I don’t know how to deal with that much choice. But at the same time, I’m so excited to have a wardrobe I actually love, instead of is good enough.
This process can reveal the weirdest anxieties.
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I dont know if I am overreacting but I have to vent somewhere.. i am almost at the weight I was 2 years ago, only then I was more firm.. Everyone I know is commenting on my weight.. One woman turned to my mother and was talking about me like I wasnt there.. "Wow she lost weight, from the butt the thighs the boobs". I know you are friends with my mother, but does this makes it okay talking about my body and commenting how my body looks? It felt disgusting.
Today someone said I lost a lot of weight and I should put some weight on because she doesnt like it. Both of them put on weight late!y. The latter turned and said that she gained 15 pounds. I told her I didnt notice and that jt was okay if she was happier this way.
Jesus, I was about to snap on her in my workplace.
Phew, venting done. :-P
'Two people get to comment on my weight, my doctor and me. You're not either. kthxbai :flowerforyou: '
Seriously, the nerve of people :huh:
I think you might be overreacting at least to the work situation, just ignore the chatter. As for your mom and her friend pretty typical conversation guessing she is a close friend of your moms....but tell your moms friend or have your mom maybe address it to be less specific. Perhaps, you look great would suffice.
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dhiammarath wrote: »
This. Plus, I enjoy shopping for clothes. Which is something I never thought I'd enjoy doing!
I’m starting back, and shopping for clothes is something that genuinely both motivates me and fills me with anxiety. I know it sounds ridiculous, but my current wardrobe is from like, 3-4 stores and has been for years. I look at all the stores *I will* be able to choose from and I get anxious - I don’t know how to deal with that much choice. But at the same time, I’m so excited to have a wardrobe I actually love, instead of is good enough.
This process can reveal the weirdest anxieties.
Me too! I am excited because there are a couple stores I'm eyeing that definitely run small and only to an XL, but have clothes I'm attracted to. However, I am definitely someone that doesn't explore outside their comfort zone often, and going into new stores can be a daunting obstacle for me, as sometimes they play loud music or have weird smells that I'm not used to. I also get a lingering sense of "not belonging". I still have issues going into Ulta because I feel like I don't belong.9 -
For me it’s less about not belonging (that’s there, but not much). It’s more - you need a dress for whatever reason - how do you do that when there are 100 stores you could find it in? Or jeans - where do you even start?RelCanonical wrote: »
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