"Can't you just be normal?"
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Springfield1970 wrote: »OP you should try an experiment to see if you gain weight by eating intuitively. You may be really good at it and not need to count.
She did. She stated that she quit counting calories for at time, did not gain any size yet felt anxiety anyway.
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We're clearly not in the same circle since nobody else I know counts calories. Yes I have lots of friends who read labels when shopping or before they eat something and are mindful of being healthy. But not a single one of my friends (and I don't have a limited friend group) has a food scale and tosses in the components of their fruit salad to log, or put their peanut butter on the scale before spreading it on bread. I'm actually surprised that's considered normal among you and your peers. Most of mine still think carbs make them fat and protien makes you skinny. Most of my friends have never even heard of weighing food before even if they were aware of tracking calories.
Well, this is odd. If you've never been around people who counted calories, what gave you the idea to start counting calories at age 12?
Her mum brought her up like that
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OP, for me, the fact that you count calories is not so much the relevant part, but the high levels of anxiety, and possible interference with your life are the red flags. At the end of the day, I'd really recommend speaking to a professional about this. If you do not have any issues with your behaviour interfering with your daily life, and you are able to cope with your anxiety, then that will be apparent in your sessions. If, however, your anxiety, and behaviour are issues, then they should be able to help you cope with them, possibly through CBT.
There is no harm in speaking to someone, just in case, but there might be harm in not.0 -
What is 'normal' about eating most/all of your meals in a restaurant?
While I agree that stressing over not knowing the calories of everything you eat is not a good thing, there is nothing at all wrong with wanting to eat the majority of your meals at home. That just seems smart to me.0 -
Ditch the boyfriend and friends. They should be more supportive. But you also need to consult with a healthcare professional regarding your unhealthy relationship with food.
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You guys are arguing over something ridiculous. It doesn't matter how often the boyfriend eats out, or how little the OP does. It doesn't matter if she counts calories or started too young and it doesn't matter how old she is.
The OP said (her own words):I know I don't have a healthy relationship with food
That, IMO, is entirely enough reason for her to talk to someone.0 -
TheVirgoddess wrote: »You guys are arguing over something ridiculous. It doesn't matter how often the boyfriend eats out, or how little the OP does. It doesn't matter if she counts calories or started too young and it doesn't matter how old she is.
The OP said (her own words):I know I don't have a healthy relationship with food
That, IMO, is entirely enough reason for her to talk to someone.
Quit trying to bring common sense to MFP.0 -
Seriously, there is no place for that. Let's just all go back for saying it is the boyfriends fault.brianpperkins wrote: »TheVirgoddess wrote: »You guys are arguing over something ridiculous. It doesn't matter how often the boyfriend eats out, or how little the OP does. It doesn't matter if she counts calories or started too young and it doesn't matter how old she is.
The OP said (her own words):I know I don't have a healthy relationship with food
That, IMO, is entirely enough reason for her to talk to someone.
Quit trying to bring common sense to MFP.
Exactly. How DARE he decide to eat out three times a day. SABOTAGE, obvs.0 -
TheVirgoddess wrote: »You guys are arguing over something ridiculous. It doesn't matter how often the boyfriend eats out, or how little the OP does. It doesn't matter if she counts calories or started too young and it doesn't matter how old she is.
The OP said (her own words):I know I don't have a healthy relationship with food
That, IMO, is entirely enough reason for her to talk to someone.
This. /thread.0 -
Ooh, and don't forget him SCREAMING at her that she should be normal for a change. Deffo his fault.
Seriously, there is no place for that. Let's just all go back for saying it is the boyfriends fault.brianpperkins wrote: »TheVirgoddess wrote: »You guys are arguing over something ridiculous. It doesn't matter how often the boyfriend eats out, or how little the OP does. It doesn't matter if she counts calories or started too young and it doesn't matter how old she is.
The OP said (her own words):I know I don't have a healthy relationship with food
That, IMO, is entirely enough reason for her to talk to someone.
Quit trying to bring common sense to MFP.
Exactly. How DARE he decide to eat out three times a day. SABOTAGE, obvs.
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Seriously, there is no place for that. Let's just all go back for saying it is the boyfriends fault.brianpperkins wrote: »TheVirgoddess wrote: »You guys are arguing over something ridiculous. It doesn't matter how often the boyfriend eats out, or how little the OP does. It doesn't matter if she counts calories or started too young and it doesn't matter how old she is.
The OP said (her own words):I know I don't have a healthy relationship with food
That, IMO, is entirely enough reason for her to talk to someone.
Quit trying to bring common sense to MFP.
Exactly. How DARE he decide to eat out three times a day. SABOTAGE, obvs.
But you know us girls need to stick together and always side with each other while blaming the boyfriend. Power in numbers.
Of course. Damn the man, yo.0 -
awesomewastaken wrote: »
Ooh, and don't forget him SCREAMING at her that she should be normal for a change. Deffo his fault.
Seriously, there is no place for that. Let's just all go back for saying it is the boyfriends fault.brianpperkins wrote: »TheVirgoddess wrote: »You guys are arguing over something ridiculous. It doesn't matter how often the boyfriend eats out, or how little the OP does. It doesn't matter if she counts calories or started too young and it doesn't matter how old she is.
The OP said (her own words):I know I don't have a healthy relationship with food
That, IMO, is entirely enough reason for her to talk to someone.
Quit trying to bring common sense to MFP.
Exactly. How DARE he decide to eat out three times a day. SABOTAGE, obvs.
Obviously. Because he's Mr. Greedy Greedy right? How dare he show some concern over her (self-admitted) unhealthy relationship with food. Terrible person, indeed.0 -
i don't see anything wrong with you not wanting to eat in restaurants because you can't control what they put in the food. when I was growing up we never ate out. i attribute a lot of my weight loss issues with the introduction of fast food and restaurant eating to my lifestyle.
maybe you could relax your standards a bit and go out just to be sociable have an iced tea or something that does not have any added sugar etc.
People may just want your company and your always refusing to accompany them probably makes them feel like you just don't want to be with them.0 -
TheVirgoddess wrote: »You guys are arguing over something ridiculous. It doesn't matter how often the boyfriend eats out, or how little the OP does. It doesn't matter if she counts calories or started too young and it doesn't matter how old she is.
The OP said (her own words):I know I don't have a healthy relationship with food
That, IMO, is entirely enough reason for her to talk to someone.
Because I'm looking at everything she wrote in context, not just one sentence. We're all familiar with the freshman 15 and relationship weight gain. She's in the "before" stage, being made to feel like there's something wrong with her because of only eating a couple meals a month outside of her home. I just don't see the point of wasting a professional's time. If anyone needs to see one, it's the boyfriend: a chef. For some cooking lessons. And also her boyfriend and friends need to find other things to do for fun rather than stuffing their faces and waist lines. They could AVOID being an MFP "before" story altogether
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TheVirgoddess wrote: »You guys are arguing over something ridiculous. It doesn't matter how often the boyfriend eats out, or how little the OP does. It doesn't matter if she counts calories or started too young and it doesn't matter how old she is.
The OP said (her own words):I know I don't have a healthy relationship with food
That, IMO, is entirely enough reason for her to talk to someone.
Because I'm looking at everything she wrote in context, not just one sentence. We're all familiar with the freshman 15 and relationship weight gain. She's in the "before" stage, being made to feel like there's something wrong with her because of only eating a couple meals a month outside of her home. I just don't see the point of wasting a professional's time. If anyone needs to see one, it's the boyfriend: a chef. For some cooking lessons. And also her boyfriend and friends need to find other things to do for fun rather than stuffing their faces and waist lines. They could AVOID being an MFP "before" story altogether
Please explain how eating out frequently = stuffing their faces and their waist lines. Do you know these people? Are you friends with them?
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