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  • never2bstopped
    never2bstopped Posts: 438 Member
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    _QueenE_ wrote: »
    _QueenE_ wrote: »
    amy_kee wrote: »
    You just don't comprehend it. You think this is just complaining? The guys behavior was totally wrong for the whole web site. He needs to go to match.com. This doesn't belong here and women don't deserve to be treated this way by guy who think they are an easy pick up. This is a diet and fitness web site and people should have the decency to act accordingly. He was in no way being respectful from the start. If he was, he won't have tried to do what he did. So, you must be under the assumption that his behavior was ok and it is a ladies fault if she doesn't explain on a diet and fitness web site that she don't want to be picked up. It was the guy's fault. Not hers. He's the creep that needs to leave. Our profiles are designed to be related to fitness and weight here....not will you have sex with me if I get to know you.

    Trying to dictate proper behavior to others on an internet site is futile. All you can do is change your own. If you refuse to change what you do, and instead cry "others must change to accommodate me" you are just complaining.

    Then MFP should give users more privacy options if they are just going to let stuff like this happen.

    Don't add friends and you can have all the privacy you want! Friends aren't a necessity to use this site.

    Creepers can still send messages though. Doesn't matter if you friend someone or not. So actually, you don't!

    Put your profile on private and stay out of any flirtatious threads and creepers will have no interest in you.

    If you have inappropriate pm's report them to the mods.

    Take control of your life, don't let others control it for you, and for peat's sake don't try to control others lives!
  • arditarose
    arditarose Posts: 15,573 Member
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    I don't get this. Here, you have the ability to state in your profile what you are looking for in a friend request. In life, I can't (I guess I COULD) walk down the street wearing a sign that says "Don't try to be my friend by saying my *kitten* looks great today".
  • never2bstopped
    never2bstopped Posts: 438 Member
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    norie92 wrote: »
    Unfortunately a lot of guys tend to think everything is fair game everywhere with no limitations. I'm not a feminist dude or whatever, nor am I a sellout but it gets tiring seeing other dudes making us look bad like this. Guys, there's a time and a place and it's not on MyFitnessPal.

    What about those who have met and married on this site? Should they have not done so!?!?

  • prettytomboi
    prettytomboi Posts: 15 Member
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    @ OP-- AMEN!!!
  • _Terrapin_
    _Terrapin_ Posts: 4,301 Member
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    _QueenE_ wrote: »
    _Terrapin_ wrote: »
    _QueenE_ wrote: »
    _QueenE_ wrote: »
    amy_kee wrote: »
    You just don't comprehend it. You think this is just complaining? The guys behavior was totally wrong for the whole web site. He needs to go to match.com. This doesn't belong here and women don't deserve to be treated this way by guy who think they are an easy pick up. This is a diet and fitness web site and people should have the decency to act accordingly. He was in no way being respectful from the start. If he was, he won't have tried to do what he did. So, you must be under the assumption that his behavior was ok and it is a ladies fault if she doesn't explain on a diet and fitness web site that she don't want to be picked up. It was the guy's fault. Not hers. He's the creep that needs to leave. Our profiles are designed to be related to fitness and weight here....not will you have sex with me if I get to know you.

    Trying to dictate proper behavior to others on an internet site is futile. All you can do is change your own. If you refuse to change what you do, and instead cry "others must change to accommodate me" you are just complaining.

    Then MFP should give users more privacy options if they are just going to let stuff like this happen.

    Don't add friends and you can have all the privacy you want! Friends aren't a necessity to use this site.

    Creepers can still send messages though. Doesn't matter if you friend someone or not. So actually, you don't!

    True and false. How would 'creepers' find you?

    If you post in the community, anyone can see your picture.

    So. . . .don't post. And you have a delete button for PM's.
  • amusedmonkey
    amusedmonkey Posts: 10,330 Member
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    Such people exist everywhere regardless of the nature of the website or venue. Treat those incidences like you would a cat caller, shrug it off, and move on.
  • mimikins2412
    mimikins2412 Posts: 25 Member
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    _Terrapin_ wrote: »
    arditarose wrote: »
    I feel like you have the ability to keep very private on MFP. Not only can you chose not to have friends, you can chose not to have a profile picture.

    But then what would provide the drama?

    and how would you discreetly brag about how hot your profile pic is?

    Seriously, there is a good reason for not posting photos if privacy is a concern for you.
  • never2bstopped
    never2bstopped Posts: 438 Member
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    _QueenE_ wrote: »
    _QueenE_ wrote: »
    _QueenE_ wrote: »
    amy_kee wrote: »
    You just don't comprehend it. You think this is just complaining? The guys behavior was totally wrong for the whole web site. He needs to go to match.com. This doesn't belong here and women don't deserve to be treated this way by guy who think they are an easy pick up. This is a diet and fitness web site and people should have the decency to act accordingly. He was in no way being respectful from the start. If he was, he won't have tried to do what he did. So, you must be under the assumption that his behavior was ok and it is a ladies fault if she doesn't explain on a diet and fitness web site that she don't want to be picked up. It was the guy's fault. Not hers. He's the creep that needs to leave. Our profiles are designed to be related to fitness and weight here....not will you have sex with me if I get to know you.

    Trying to dictate proper behavior to others on an internet site is futile. All you can do is change your own. If you refuse to change what you do, and instead cry "others must change to accommodate me" you are just complaining.

    Then MFP should give users more privacy options if they are just going to let stuff like this happen.

    Don't add friends and you can have all the privacy you want! Friends aren't a necessity to use this site.

    Creepers can still send messages though. Doesn't matter if you friend someone or not. So actually, you don't!

    Put your profile on private and stay out of any flirtatious threads and creepers will have no interest in you.

    If you have inappropriate pm's report them to the mods.

    Take control of your life, don't let others control it for you, and for peat's sake don't try to control others lives!

    Not true, you don't have to post in those *kitten* threads to receive unwanted messages.


    You must be quite desirable if you post nothing provocative, stay out of the BS threads and still get stalked.

  • Alluminati
    Alluminati Posts: 6,208 Member
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    _Terrapin_ wrote: »
    amy_kee wrote: »
    You just don't comprehend it. You think this is just complaining? The guys behavior was totally wrong for the whole web site. He needs to go to match.com. This doesn't belong here and women don't deserve to be treated this way by guy who think they are an easy pick up. This is a diet and fitness web site and people should have the decency to act accordingly. He was in no way being respectful from the start. If he was, he won't have tried to do what he did. So, you must be under the assumption that his behavior was ok and it is a ladies fault if she doesn't explain on a diet and fitness web site that she don't want to be picked up. It was the guy's fault. Not hers. He's the creep that needs to leave. Our profiles are designed to be related to fitness and weight here....not will you have sex with me if I get to know you.

    At least you aren't overreacting. . . .advice was place it on your profile page(for the OP)...problem solved. Couple of months ago 2 guys were walking passed my wife and I. One guy says nice *kitten* as we walk by. I stop and ask them to be a little more discreet and yes she does have a nice *kitten*. They looked at me and said"We weren't talking about her" BOOM! Okay, carry on.

    Oh, and my first sentence on my profile page is I'm married to my running inspiration. Wow, that was difficult.

    They were talking about your booty, weren't they?
  • _Terrapin_
    _Terrapin_ Posts: 4,301 Member
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    _Terrapin_ wrote: »
    arditarose wrote: »
    I feel like you have the ability to keep very private on MFP. Not only can you chose not to have friends, you can chose not to have a profile picture.

    But then what would provide the drama?

    and how would you discreetly brag about how hot your profile pic is?

    Seriously, there is a good reason for not posting photos if privacy is a concern for you.

    Second part true. First part, I confused.
  • bronkeekong
    bronkeekong Posts: 49 Member
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    LOL.
  • kotarea
    kotarea Posts: 212 Member
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    I just don't accept FR from guys... keeps life simple. :blush:

    I do the same to a sense, I check out their friends list first if I see 95% women I just decline their friend request if they have a mixture of gender then they are probably here for the right reason and I will accept lol

  • _Terrapin_
    _Terrapin_ Posts: 4,301 Member
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    OdesAngel wrote: »
    _Terrapin_ wrote: »
    amy_kee wrote: »
    You just don't comprehend it. You think this is just complaining? The guys behavior was totally wrong for the whole web site. He needs to go to match.com. This doesn't belong here and women don't deserve to be treated this way by guy who think they are an easy pick up. This is a diet and fitness web site and people should have the decency to act accordingly. He was in no way being respectful from the start. If he was, he won't have tried to do what he did. So, you must be under the assumption that his behavior was ok and it is a ladies fault if she doesn't explain on a diet and fitness web site that she don't want to be picked up. It was the guy's fault. Not hers. He's the creep that needs to leave. Our profiles are designed to be related to fitness and weight here....not will you have sex with me if I get to know you.

    At least you aren't overreacting. . . .advice was place it on your profile page(for the OP)...problem solved. Couple of months ago 2 guys were walking passed my wife and I. One guy says nice *kitten* as we walk by. I stop and ask them to be a little more discreet and yes she does have a nice *kitten*. They looked at me and said"We weren't talking about her" BOOM! Okay, carry on.

    Oh, and my first sentence on my profile page is I'm married to my running inspiration. Wow, that was difficult.

    They were talking about your booty, weren't they?
    I think so; then again there were other people around. Maybe, not sure. Dat gum it, I need to find those lads. . .

  • ihad
    ihad Posts: 7,463 Member
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    People use this site for all kinds of reasons. There's no one right way to MFP. Just clarify your intentions, and people will generally respect that.

    http://www.myfitnesspal.com/blog/ihad/view/what-is-mfp-673617
  • KETOGENICGURL
    KETOGENICGURL Posts: 687 Member
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    Missy and Amy-Kee have valid points, they don't NEED protection, didn't ASK for it, they don't HAVE to tolerate it, and there is NO WAY to not show anything abut yourself UNTIL you make it public. You might as well say anyone can contact you and comment on your weight, your looks, and ask for naked pictures or suggest anything they like! which can happen in public too....but really, why should that be allowed here??? Telling someone attractive "don't put up your picture then" is like the old "she was asking for it by dressing that way"…..and have you seen the naked body shots here..male and female? In our absorbed SELFIE NATION someone modest, or not willing to strip to show abs is told to like it or lump it. You don't have to be a "feminist" to expect courtesy and some level of manners.

    I had a person 'friend' within 2 minutes when I got here, and all I saw was a his ID name, no photo, NO other info. period. So I had to write and ask who he was, etc. Turns out he offers a ton of great links and info, IS a person I want to know, but noway to tell…people here FORGET this after a while if they are not 'public' to anyone but their existing friends…. the POINT of MFP for many is the SUPPORT, so staying invisible removes that option.
  • mimikins2412
    mimikins2412 Posts: 25 Member
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    _Terrapin_ wrote: »
    _Terrapin_ wrote: »
    arditarose wrote: »
    I feel like you have the ability to keep very private on MFP. Not only can you chose not to have friends, you can chose not to have a profile picture.

    But then what would provide the drama?

    and how would you discreetly brag about how hot your profile pic is?

    Seriously, there is a good reason for not posting photos if privacy is a concern for you.

    Second part true. First part, I confused.

    I just don't understand why it is necessary to start a thread about this --- ignore the creeper and move on --- but it is a subtle way to bring attention to one's self/selfie.

  • never2bstopped
    never2bstopped Posts: 438 Member
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    Missy and Amy-Kee have valid points, they don't NEED protection, didn't ASK for it, they don't HAVE to tolerate it, and there is NO WAY to not show anything abut yourself UNTIL you make it public. You might as well say anyone can contact you and comment on your weight, your looks, and ask for naked pictures or suggest anything they like! which can happen in public too....but really, why should that be allowed here??? Telling someone attractive "don't put up your picture then" is like the old "she was asking for it by dressing that way"…..and have you seen the naked body shots here..male and female? In our absorbed SELFIE NATION someone modest, or not willing to strip to show abs is told to like it or lump it. You don't have to be a "feminist" to expect courtesy and some level of manners.

    I had a person 'friend' within 2 minutes when I got here, and all I saw was a his ID name, no photo, NO other info. period. So I had to write and ask who he was, etc. Turns out he offers a ton of great links and info, IS a person I want to know, but noway to tell…people here FORGET this after a while if they are not 'public' to anyone but their existing friends…. the POINT of MFP for many is the SUPPORT, so staying invisible removes that option.

    It's fine if someone dosnt want to be flirted with

    BUT

    Dictating the way others should act on a public site and refusing to make your expectations known on your profile is just silly and childish. It's like a married woman going out with the girls and not wearing her weading ring, then getting mad guys don't know she is married.

    ALSO

    There are people who use the flirtation as motivation. Who are you to say they are wrong?

  • never2bstopped
    never2bstopped Posts: 438 Member
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    _QueenE_ wrote: »
    _QueenE_ wrote: »
    _QueenE_ wrote: »
    _QueenE_ wrote: »
    amy_kee wrote: »
    You just don't comprehend it. You think this is just complaining? The guys behavior was totally wrong for the whole web site. He needs to go to match.com. This doesn't belong here and women don't deserve to be treated this way by guy who think they are an easy pick up. This is a diet and fitness web site and people should have the decency to act accordingly. He was in no way being respectful from the start. If he was, he won't have tried to do what he did. So, you must be under the assumption that his behavior was ok and it is a ladies fault if she doesn't explain on a diet and fitness web site that she don't want to be picked up. It was the guy's fault. Not hers. He's the creep that needs to leave. Our profiles are designed to be related to fitness and weight here....not will you have sex with me if I get to know you.

    Trying to dictate proper behavior to others on an internet site is futile. All you can do is change your own. If you refuse to change what you do, and instead cry "others must change to accommodate me" you are just complaining.

    Then MFP should give users more privacy options if they are just going to let stuff like this happen.

    Don't add friends and you can have all the privacy you want! Friends aren't a necessity to use this site.

    Creepers can still send messages though. Doesn't matter if you friend someone or not. So actually, you don't!

    Put your profile on private and stay out of any flirtatious threads and creepers will have no interest in you.

    If you have inappropriate pm's report them to the mods.

    Take control of your life, don't let others control it for you, and for peat's sake don't try to control others lives!

    Not true, you don't have to post in those *kitten* threads to receive unwanted messages.


    You must be quite desirable if you post nothing provocative, stay out of the BS threads and still get stalked.

    And weirdo's HAVE to have a reason?

    True weirdo's are rare and won't follow guidelines anyway. If they are what you are worried about may I suggest unplugging your wifi and locking yourself in your room.
  • acquilla30
    acquilla30 Posts: 147 Member
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    The thing is people meet significant others everywhere. It doesn't sound like he was inappropriate, he asked, you said no, he unfriended you the end. Lol, I don't understand the people ranting about how horrible a trespass it was smh. I have met guys at the grocery store. Now I don't go there for the purpose of finding a date, I go there specifically for food, but if someone approaches me and asks me out, I don't go off on a rant about how inappropriate it is for him to approach me at a grocery store, where the sole purpose is to buy food not get hit on lol. If I'm not interested or unavailable, I politely decline and go about my day. Same deal here. People have made simple and easy suggestions on addressing it, so it doesn't happen anymore. Good luck.
  • Alluminati
    Alluminati Posts: 6,208 Member
    edited March 2015
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    _QueenE_ wrote: »
    Obviously some people in this thread have received the same attention that OP received and live for it and thrive on it. That's alright. Hopefully they don't run into any trouble with that kind of attention in the real world.
    Lol.
    tumblr_mthlrkGgW01sj3oxho1_400.gif