Can men and women be "just friends"?

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  • Trueray
    Trueray Posts: 1,189 Member
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    I say yes sometimes guys take every single thing you say as a joke and its good to have a females point of view. Women think of things that guys would never come up with.
  • _Waffle_
    _Waffle_ Posts: 13,049 Member
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    I can be just friends with a guy, but they usually cant be just friends with me. True story. Which is annoying.

    But what if I don't find you sexually attractive at all? It would be easy to be friends with you I think.
  • BeachGingerOnTheRocks
    BeachGingerOnTheRocks Posts: 3,927 Member
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    I sure hope so. I'd hate to find out that I've been doing it wrong all these years and all these "friends" aren't friends because I'm secretly wanting to sleep with them all and don't realize it.

    Of course men and women can be friends.
  • joycebug
    joycebug Posts: 309
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    Absolutely!!
  • Ophidion
    Ophidion Posts: 2,065 Member
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    I love guy friends. They're awesome! As long as no one has feelings for the other one, that's when it gets tricky.

    No, that's when it gets AWESOME.
    I think that's known as friends with benefits! :P

    haha. FWB is kind of weird tho. I kind of find it hard to get down with someone who's just a friend aka I have no feeling with them. I know. I'm like a girl. but I need a connection people. I end up thinking about someone else lol.
    Well just call me sister cause I need the connection (attraction) too, FWB in my mind probably really means F#$k buddy which is completely different to a friend.Sexual interaction being the basis not friendship as it were, yes its real freindly ;) but still a whole different dynamic than a platonic friendship.
  • 00sarah
    00sarah Posts: 621 Member
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    My best friends (other than my husband) are both guys. One is my brother. The other is gay. Does this count? Lol
  • MyChocolateDiet
    MyChocolateDiet Posts: 22,281 Member
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    I never had a male friend who didn't want to get in my pants yet. I say yet, because I'm getting older and it might start happening now I think. Since my brain has more to offer, the guys are getting older and less up for anything, and there's more to have in common besides sex. I have had one really really good male best friend who was enough of another sexual orientation not to be attracted to me physically. The rest of the attraction intellectual, or silly or whatever was off the charts though. It was like we were cut from the same cloth. We were like " 'da club " soul mates. Like soul train mates.
  • BeachIron
    BeachIron Posts: 6,490 Member
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    Attractive people with personalities can have friends that they don't sleep with. That's because there's something other than looks involved. People with no personality on the other hand . . .
  • _Waffle_
    _Waffle_ Posts: 13,049 Member
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    My best friends (other than my husband) are both guys. One is my brother. The other is gay. Does this count? Lol

    EDIT: Never mind. I misread your statement. Carry on.
  • BinaryPulsar
    BinaryPulsar Posts: 8,927 Member
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    I'm bisexual, does that mean I can't be friends with anyone...
  • pudadough
    pudadough Posts: 1,271 Member
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    Yeah. My best guy friend pursued me quite aggressively when we first met. But I think he realized that we were better as friends. He's a great source of insight into the male brain.


    Mature people can be friends even if they once shared a romantic attachment. I know more than one couple who were married, are now divorced, and do much better as friends.
  • SrJoben
    SrJoben Posts: 484 Member
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    Maybe...sorta...sometimes...for some value of friends.
    It depends in part on if you say it qualifies as just friends if nothing is DONE, or only if nothing is FELT.

    Here's my take:
    Yes, but probably not close friends. The probability of one or both parties developing feelings and/or physical attraction is extremely high in a close relationship.

    And of course it's entirely possible that the reason the friendship started in the first place was because of one way attraction. I argue this disqualifies it. Unrequited love is not a simple friendship.

    ...I don't think I've ever seen a man ask this question... make of that what you will.
  • missmegan831
    missmegan831 Posts: 824 Member
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    Absolutely!! My BFF of 25 years is a male.... I wouldnt have it any other way... I never looked at him in a 'boyfriend' manner nor has he me... we are just super close... he knows everything about me, my life... everything... sometimes personalities just 'click' doesnt matter whats beneath the belt :blushing: :blushing: :blushing:
  • nikilis
    nikilis Posts: 2,305 Member
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    I love guy friends. They're awesome! As long as no one has feelings for the other one, that's when it gets tricky.

    No, that's when it gets AWESOME.


    or thats when it gets sad.

    Personal experience?

    if you both like each other - awesome

    if you both want to have FWB sexytime - awesome

    if one out of the two has feelings that are no reciprocated - sad for that person.

    Aha, I gotcha. I've never had that happen with someone who was a friend first, but I have been on the bad of no reciprocation far too many times.

    I dated this girl when I was 14, and again around 16 and then we alost did at 18, then I ran into her in london when I was 28. so we have history. we started hanging out and she had broken up with her boyfriend recently. I'm a sucker for broken wings. I really wanted to just be her friend but shes really sweet and cute, and I would try to snap out of it but when we were hanging out I would look at her and be like, damn, I could give it up for this girl. but shes not into me. we have a good connection and we have known each other for a long time and been together before.... ohh.... she is sweet. were in separate countries now. shes just my kind of girl. buut thats ok. you cant win em all.
  • BeachIron
    BeachIron Posts: 6,490 Member
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    I'm bisexual, does that mean I can't be friends with anyone...

    Of course. And since you're bisexual you're obviously interested in everyone. Everyone.
  • dakotababy
    dakotababy Posts: 2,406 Member
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    I've heard it said that they wouldn't even be friends with females without some sort of attraction. Generally you ask a woman and she says "of course! We're just friends!" But the man's thoughts are quite the opposite.

    ...Then I have a lot of guys attracted to me, and I did not even know it until now! :D {ego boost}

    And that also mean there are a lot of guys that are attracted to me that I really do not want to be attracted to me.

    Anyway - Yes I do believe men and women can be "just" friends :)
  • MyChocolateDiet
    MyChocolateDiet Posts: 22,281 Member
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    I can be just friends with a guy, but they usually cant be just friends with me. True story. Which is annoying.

    But what if I don't find you sexually attractive at all? It would be easy to be friends with you I think.

    operative word here...you think.
  • bregalad5
    bregalad5 Posts: 3,965 Member
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    Yeah. My best guy friend pursued me quite aggressively when we first met. But I think he realized that we were better as friends. He's a great source of insight into the male brain.


    Mature people can be friends even if they once shared a romantic attachment. I know more than one couple who were married, are now divorced, and do much better as friends.

    Ha I had a crush on one of my best friends when we first met, but then we realized it just wasn't going to happen, and now, yeah, we hang out all the time and there's just nothing there physically or romantically.

    My absolute best friend is my ex. Most people can't get their heads around that, but it works for us :smile:
  • tehboxingkitteh
    tehboxingkitteh Posts: 1,574 Member
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    I'm bisexual, does that mean I can't be friends with anyone...

    Of course. And since you're bisexual you're obviously interested in everyone. Everyone.
    I'm bisexual. I guess that means I have to bang all my friends?
  • BeachIron
    BeachIron Posts: 6,490 Member
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    I'm bisexual, does that mean I can't be friends with anyone...

    Of course. And since you're bisexual you're obviously interested in everyone. Everyone.
    I'm bisexual. I guess that means I have to bang all my friends?

    Somewhere, someone is missing their sarcasm meter

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