Can men and women be "just friends"?

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Replies

  • Cp731
    Cp731 Posts: 3,195 Member
    I can be just friends with a guy, but they usually cant be just friends with me. True story. Which is annoying.

    But what if I don't find you sexually attractive at all? It would be easy to be friends with you I think.

    idk.gif
  • Rosplosion
    Rosplosion Posts: 739 Member
    I have women that I am "just friends" with. So I would say, yes.

    Reverse the gender and this applies to me. Quotation marks applied correctly.
  • The_Enginerd
    The_Enginerd Posts: 3,982 Member
    I'm bisexual, does that mean I can't be friends with anyone...

    Of course. And since you're bisexual you're obviously interested in everyone. Everyone.
    I'm bisexual. I guess that means I have to bang all my friends?
    Yes. Every. Single. One.

    Whether at the same time or have them form an orderly line, that's your call.
  • Ophidion
    Ophidion Posts: 2,065 Member
    I'm bisexual, does that mean I can't be friends with anyone...

    Of course. And since you're bisexual you're obviously interested in everyone. Everyone.
    I'm bisexual. I guess that means I have to bang all my friends?
    Yes. Every. Single. One.

    Whether at the same time or have them form an orderly line, that's your call.
    lmao:laugh: :laugh: :laugh:
  • tehboxingkitteh
    tehboxingkitteh Posts: 1,574 Member
    I'm bisexual, does that mean I can't be friends with anyone...

    Of course. And since you're bisexual you're obviously interested in everyone. Everyone.
    I'm bisexual. I guess that means I have to bang all my friends?

    Somewhere, someone is missing their sarcasm meter

    I'm not missing it. Maybe I should've put a :laugh: to indicate I got the joke :flowerforyou:

    ETA:
    Yes. Every. Single. One.

    Whether at the same time or have them form an orderly line, that's your call.
    see, he gets me :drinker:
  • anemoneprose
    anemoneprose Posts: 1,805 Member
    of course. & yes, friendship (between/among any of the genders, of any sexual persuasion) often involves some marginal element of physical attraction, which is sometimes sexualized, sometimes not, sometimes one-sided, sometimes not, but, you make a decision about how it's going to go & manage it.
  • MyChocolateDiet
    MyChocolateDiet Posts: 22,281 Member
    I'm bisexual, does that mean I can't be friends with anyone...

    well you can and are friends with me online. but we could never meet in person cause once you caught a whiff of my pheromones or mojo or ladyaura it would be a whole 'nother story.
  • nope31
    nope31 Posts: 174
    Shall we shag now or shall we shag later baby, yeahhhhhhh
  • _Waffle_
    _Waffle_ Posts: 13,049 Member
    I can be just friends with a guy, but they usually cant be just friends with me. True story. Which is annoying.

    But what if I don't find you sexually attractive at all? It would be easy to be friends with you I think.

    idk.gif

    No, you don't look like my mom or anything but I need some personality and spark before I can click with someone. You're just too nice and sweet for that I think.
  • JasonT1973
    JasonT1973 Posts: 229 Member
    I've had this talk a bunch of times with people.
    Guys and girls are different creatures.
    If a guy is your friend and has never asked you out it is because:

    1) He doesn't find you attractive.
    2) He is waiting for you to be single.
    3) He is waiting to be single himself.
    4) He is gay- see #1.
    5) He is biding his time in some strange plan he concocted inside his head for the 'right time.'
  • TheEffort
    TheEffort Posts: 1,028 Member
    I think men and women can be friends if the expectations don't go beyond that premise. Often when deep feelings become involved the relationship changes...in my opinion.

    8488541.png
  • whierd
    whierd Posts: 14,025 Member
    I've had this talk a bunch of times with people.
    Guys and girls are different creatures.
    If a guy is your friend and has never asked you out it is because:

    1) He doesn't find you attractive.
    2) He is waiting for you to be single.
    3) He is waiting to be single himself.
    4) He is gay- see #1.
    5) He is biding his time in some strange plan he concocted inside his head for the 'right time.'

    Except this isn't true. I have had a female friend for 13 years. I find her attractive but I value her more as a friend than as anything "more" than that. I never once was waiting for her to be single, or biding my time, or any of that other nonsense.
  • lostdogg
    lostdogg Posts: 450 Member
    Yes they can. I have had some female friends that I don't feel any attraction to. They are beautiful women. It's just not like that for us. Before marriage we shared chat on everything from date stories to sports to idle chit chat. Since marriage we don't talk about romance issues to prevent any awkwardness (especially when we had probs with our significant others). We had boundaries and that's how it worked for us. I've had (in the past) friendships with women where the boundaries were not set firmly and those friendships faded away.

    I think the key is being honest with yourself and your friends about feelings and boundaries.
  • BinaryPulsar
    BinaryPulsar Posts: 8,927 Member
    I'm bisexual, does that mean I can't be friends with anyone...

    Of course. And since you're bisexual you're obviously interested in everyone. Everyone.
    I'm bisexual. I guess that means I have to bang all my friends?
    Yes. Every. Single. One.

    Whether at the same time or have them form an orderly line, that's your call.
    lmao:laugh: :laugh: :laugh:

    I'm going to break it up into groups and choreograph it.
  • The_Enginerd
    The_Enginerd Posts: 3,982 Member
    I've had this talk a bunch of times with people.
    Guys and girls are different creatures.
    If a guy is your friend and has never asked you out it is because:

    1) He doesn't find you attractive.
    2) He is waiting for you to be single.
    3) He is waiting to be single himself.
    4) He is gay- see #1.
    5) He is biding his time in some strange plan he concocted inside his head for the 'right time.'

    Except this isn't true. I have had a female friend for 13 years. I find her attractive but I value her more as a friend than as anything "more" than that. I never once was waiting for her to be single, or biding my time, or any of that other nonsense.
    If you were in the situation where you were both single, would you pursue though?
  • tehboxingkitteh
    tehboxingkitteh Posts: 1,574 Member
    I've had this talk a bunch of times with people.
    Guys and girls are different creatures.
    If a guy is your friend and has never asked you out it is because:

    1) He doesn't find you attractive.
    2) He is waiting for you to be single.
    3) He is waiting to be single himself.
    4) He is gay- see #1.
    5) He is biding his time in some strange plan he concocted inside his head for the 'right time.'

    Except this isn't true. I have had a female friend for 13 years. I find her attractive but I value her more as a friend than as anything "more" than that. I never once was waiting for her to be single, or biding my time, or any of that other nonsense.
    My best friend is a guy. He's told me he finds me attractive. We've been single at the same time, multiple times. He's not gay. He knows we're better as friends because he doesn't want to risk losing me.
  • whierd
    whierd Posts: 14,025 Member
    I've had this talk a bunch of times with people.
    Guys and girls are different creatures.
    If a guy is your friend and has never asked you out it is because:

    1) He doesn't find you attractive.
    2) He is waiting for you to be single.
    3) He is waiting to be single himself.
    4) He is gay- see #1.
    5) He is biding his time in some strange plan he concocted inside his head for the 'right time.'

    Except this isn't true. I have had a female friend for 13 years. I find her attractive but I value her more as a friend than as anything "more" than that. I never once was waiting for her to be single, or biding my time, or any of that other nonsense.
    If you were in the situation where you were both single, would you pursue though?

    Nope. I value her far too much as a friend.
  • whierd
    whierd Posts: 14,025 Member
    I've had this talk a bunch of times with people.
    Guys and girls are different creatures.
    If a guy is your friend and has never asked you out it is because:

    1) He doesn't find you attractive.
    2) He is waiting for you to be single.
    3) He is waiting to be single himself.
    4) He is gay- see #1.
    5) He is biding his time in some strange plan he concocted inside his head for the 'right time.'

    Except this isn't true. I have had a female friend for 13 years. I find her attractive but I value her more as a friend than as anything "more" than that. I never once was waiting for her to be single, or biding my time, or any of that other nonsense.
    My best friend is a guy. He's told me he finds me attractive. We've been single at the same time, multiple times. He's not gay. He knows we're better as friends because he doesn't want to risk losing me.

    Exactly, this is someone who has been with me every step since I was 16. We went through teen angst together, found/lost love, and became adults together. And we even talked about "us" at one point and decided that it wasn't going to happen.
  • keithmustloseweight
    keithmustloseweight Posts: 309 Member
    My best friend is a guy, has been for 9 years and I do not see this changing any time soon so yes.

    friend-zone.jpeg
  • 2stepscloser
    2stepscloser Posts: 2,900 Member
    Most definitely! I get along great with guys. Love that there is no drama in the relationship like there is with other women.
  • IpuffyheartHeelsinthegym
    IpuffyheartHeelsinthegym Posts: 5,573 Member
    yes, because I can have intellectual grown up conversations without feeling the need to jump every guys bones.
  • Cp731
    Cp731 Posts: 3,195 Member
    I can be just friends with a guy, but they usually cant be just friends with me. True story. Which is annoying.

    But what if I don't find you sexually attractive at all? It would be easy to be friends with you I think.

    idk.gif

    No, you don't look like my mom or anything but I need some personality and spark before I can click with someone. You're just too nice and sweet for that I think.

    "Too nice and sweet" = no personality and or spark?

    Mmmkay. Im happy ya picked up on my gif and what I was going for ther, which means I do have personality and spark.
  • tehboxingkitteh
    tehboxingkitteh Posts: 1,574 Member
    I've had this talk a bunch of times with people.
    Guys and girls are different creatures.
    If a guy is your friend and has never asked you out it is because:

    1) He doesn't find you attractive.
    2) He is waiting for you to be single.
    3) He is waiting to be single himself.
    4) He is gay- see #1.
    5) He is biding his time in some strange plan he concocted inside his head for the 'right time.'

    Except this isn't true. I have had a female friend for 13 years. I find her attractive but I value her more as a friend than as anything "more" than that. I never once was waiting for her to be single, or biding my time, or any of that other nonsense.
    My best friend is a guy. He's told me he finds me attractive. We've been single at the same time, multiple times. He's not gay. He knows we're better as friends because he doesn't want to risk losing me.

    Exactly, this is someone who has been with me every step since I was 16. We went through teen angst together, found/lost love, and became adults together. And we even talked about "us" at one point and decided that it wasn't going to happen.
    He and I have had that talk. We decided together that what we have now is best.
  • JessHealthKick
    JessHealthKick Posts: 800 Member
    Actually, most of my close friends are guys... some of them I have had a 'crush' on (when I was 14, so 7+ years ago) in the past but now we are very close. Ex I dated for 2.5years is one of my best friends!
  • lostdogg
    lostdogg Posts: 450 Member
    I've had this talk a bunch of times with people.
    Guys and girls are different creatures.
    If a guy is your friend and has never asked you out it is because:

    1) He doesn't find you attractive.
    2) He is waiting for you to be single.
    3) He is waiting to be single himself.
    4) He is gay- see #1.
    5) He is biding his time in some strange plan he concocted inside his head for the 'right time.'

    Except this isn't true. I have had a female friend for 13 years. I find her attractive but I value her more as a friend than as anything "more" than that. I never once was waiting for her to be single, or biding my time, or any of that other nonsense.
    My best friend is a guy. He's told me he finds me attractive. We've been single at the same time, multiple times. He's not gay. He knows we're better as friends because he doesn't want to risk losing me.

    Exactly, this is someone who has been with me every step since I was 16. We went through teen angst together, found/lost love, and became adults together. And we even talked about "us" at one point and decided that it wasn't going to happen.
    Kitteh, wheird:
    I've had similar circumstances too.... I think it's more common than ppl think. Some of the best friends I've had were attractive ppl of the opposite sex. As I posted earlier is about honest feelings and boundaries. I agree with you both.
  • jennpaulson
    jennpaulson Posts: 850 Member
    Growing up I always had more close guy friends than close girl friends. Since we're at an age where most everyone is married I don't have many of the same guy friends anymore because their wives didn't approve, even though we had been friends since middle school. The guy friends I have now have told me they find me attractive and they don't understand why I have such bad luck with love because they think it's awesome that I'm not needy, love to go to the track, pay all my own bills, take care of my kid, and work on my truck but they're all married and even if there is flirting, it's all harmless and going no where.

    So... Yes men and women can be just friends.
  • The_Enginerd
    The_Enginerd Posts: 3,982 Member
    I've had this talk a bunch of times with people.
    Guys and girls are different creatures.
    If a guy is your friend and has never asked you out it is because:

    1) He doesn't find you attractive.
    2) He is waiting for you to be single.
    3) He is waiting to be single himself.
    4) He is gay- see #1.
    5) He is biding his time in some strange plan he concocted inside his head for the 'right time.'

    Except this isn't true. I have had a female friend for 13 years. I find her attractive but I value her more as a friend than as anything "more" than that. I never once was waiting for her to be single, or biding my time, or any of that other nonsense.
    My best friend is a guy. He's told me he finds me attractive. We've been single at the same time, multiple times. He's not gay. He knows we're better as friends because he doesn't want to risk losing me.

    Exactly, this is someone who has been with me every step since I was 16. We went through teen angst together, found/lost love, and became adults together. And we even talked about "us" at one point and decided that it wasn't going to happen.
    Part of me thinks, if I could be friends with them that long that what might grow out of it is worth pursuing, even if things don't work out. Another part of me say, **** gets weird after you've been friends that long and it just won't work out well trying to make the transition. I haven't had the situation where I've the talk about it or tried to pursue after a long term friendship. Just would feel kind of awkward.
  • indigo_rose
    indigo_rose Posts: 250
    hell yeah they can.. I have a few guy friends... I'd be a big fat liar if the thought of boinking them hasn't crossed my mind at somr point in the time I've known them.. But hey.. I'm only human.
  • LYNN8SUPERSTAR
    LYNN8SUPERSTAR Posts: 43
    I definitely believe men and women can be friends.:smile: No funny stuff LOL!:laugh:
  • fShaw86
    fShaw86 Posts: 878 Member
    Depends on what kind of man or woman you are?

    I have some guy friends who I can have a regular conversation with, where they don't feel the need to make sexual innuendos or flirt. Some other guy "friends" on the other hand I cannot talk to without feeling like I'm just gonna end up as another notch on their bedpost.

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