Stopping Junk Food From Coming in my House
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Funny, it seems to me that saying "I'M losing weight so YOU need to change your behavior" is absolutely a "ME ME ME" mentality. I wouldn't dream of making my BF stop eating the way he likes to, just because I went on a diet.cindyangotti wrote: »My family doesn't have that "ME ME ME" mentality. We would do ANYTHING for each other and when I needed support in losing my weight I got it with no problem and I am thankful they were there for me in the way I needed them to be.
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Well, she asked. We are off topic, but it don't think that the poor OP is coming back.barbecuesauce wrote: »
I didn't make the abuse flag, but felt the same way about it.UltimateRBF wrote: »UltimateRBF wrote: »UltimateRBF wrote: »He should be supportive and not buy so much junk. In fact, he should stop eating it himself.If you are a food addict and can't stay away from your trigger foods, my opinion is that the household HAS to help you through this.
I am a food addict. My hubby loves junk food and lots of it, so I gave him my list of my 5 trigger foods that simply can't be in my house. If they are, he has to lock them in a briefcase that I don't know the combination. On the occasion he leaves them out, I told him that I must throw them away. It's just too difficult for me to be tempted. I gotta make ONE place in my life that's my safety zone. At work, I'm tortured with goodies and junk all day, every day.
If you had a drug addict or an alcoholic for a spouse or child, would you torture them with putting their drug in the house? I would think not.
Addicts need all the support we can get. We have to eat 3 times a day, every day and it's a challenge just to get through that some days. It's NOT just the addict's issue alone.
Your friendly dietitian
Jenn
hahaha
NO
I would like to know what part of this reply was against the TOS and as such was deemed flag worthy by someone...
I don't know who clicked it, but the "hahaha" comes off like you're laughing at the person, which is beyond rude and into insulting. Since you asked.
I was laughing at the statement, which is fairly obvious
The "hahaha" thing...it is not disagreement. It's not anything, really, but rude and insulting. It's saying, "Look at me, I'm laughing at you" and that's pretty much all it says.
So, my guess is that is why whoever flagged it as abuse (or spam, I didn't look) flagged it. They didn't think to use the "Report" feature, which is how it should've been reported. Maybe next time, they will.
This post is as unhelpful to the OP as that one so
Wait, now this post is unhelpful. Time for memes.
They never come back and update. I always feel gypped.
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Well, she asked. We are off topic, but it don't think that the poor OP is coming back.barbecuesauce wrote: »
I didn't make the abuse flag, but felt the same way about it.UltimateRBF wrote: »UltimateRBF wrote: »UltimateRBF wrote: »He should be supportive and not buy so much junk. In fact, he should stop eating it himself.If you are a food addict and can't stay away from your trigger foods, my opinion is that the household HAS to help you through this.
I am a food addict. My hubby loves junk food and lots of it, so I gave him my list of my 5 trigger foods that simply can't be in my house. If they are, he has to lock them in a briefcase that I don't know the combination. On the occasion he leaves them out, I told him that I must throw them away. It's just too difficult for me to be tempted. I gotta make ONE place in my life that's my safety zone. At work, I'm tortured with goodies and junk all day, every day.
If you had a drug addict or an alcoholic for a spouse or child, would you torture them with putting their drug in the house? I would think not.
Addicts need all the support we can get. We have to eat 3 times a day, every day and it's a challenge just to get through that some days. It's NOT just the addict's issue alone.
Your friendly dietitian
Jenn
hahaha
NO
I would like to know what part of this reply was against the TOS and as such was deemed flag worthy by someone...
I don't know who clicked it, but the "hahaha" comes off like you're laughing at the person, which is beyond rude and into insulting. Since you asked.
I was laughing at the statement, which is fairly obvious
The "hahaha" thing...it is not disagreement. It's not anything, really, but rude and insulting. It's saying, "Look at me, I'm laughing at you" and that's pretty much all it says.
So, my guess is that is why whoever flagged it as abuse (or spam, I didn't look) flagged it. They didn't think to use the "Report" feature, which is how it should've been reported. Maybe next time, they will.
This post is as unhelpful to the OP as that one so
Wait, now this post is unhelpful. Time for memes.
They never come back and update. I always feel gypped.
I recently saw a post where the OP came back after a couple of years to yell at someone she felt insulted her. There's always hope.0 -
Funny, it seems to me that saying "I'M losing weight so YOU need to change your behavior" is absolutely a "ME ME ME" mentality. I wouldn't dream of making my BF stop eating the way he likes to, just because I went on a diet.cindyangotti wrote: »My family doesn't have that "ME ME ME" mentality. We would do ANYTHING for each other and when I needed support in losing my weight I got it with no problem and I am thankful they were there for me in the way I needed them to be.
Perspective is an amazing thing. It reads this way to me, as well. It also seems to me as though OP has not fully communicated her expectations, especially since her husband thinks he is being supportive.
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LOL! I saw that, too. Years later. Ayiyi.barbecuesauce wrote: »
Well, she asked. We are off topic, but it don't think that the poor OP is coming back.barbecuesauce wrote: »
I didn't make the abuse flag, but felt the same way about it.UltimateRBF wrote: »UltimateRBF wrote: »UltimateRBF wrote: »He should be supportive and not buy so much junk. In fact, he should stop eating it himself.If you are a food addict and can't stay away from your trigger foods, my opinion is that the household HAS to help you through this.
I am a food addict. My hubby loves junk food and lots of it, so I gave him my list of my 5 trigger foods that simply can't be in my house. If they are, he has to lock them in a briefcase that I don't know the combination. On the occasion he leaves them out, I told him that I must throw them away. It's just too difficult for me to be tempted. I gotta make ONE place in my life that's my safety zone. At work, I'm tortured with goodies and junk all day, every day.
If you had a drug addict or an alcoholic for a spouse or child, would you torture them with putting their drug in the house? I would think not.
Addicts need all the support we can get. We have to eat 3 times a day, every day and it's a challenge just to get through that some days. It's NOT just the addict's issue alone.
Your friendly dietitian
Jenn
hahaha
NO
I would like to know what part of this reply was against the TOS and as such was deemed flag worthy by someone...
I don't know who clicked it, but the "hahaha" comes off like you're laughing at the person, which is beyond rude and into insulting. Since you asked.
I was laughing at the statement, which is fairly obvious
The "hahaha" thing...it is not disagreement. It's not anything, really, but rude and insulting. It's saying, "Look at me, I'm laughing at you" and that's pretty much all it says.
So, my guess is that is why whoever flagged it as abuse (or spam, I didn't look) flagged it. They didn't think to use the "Report" feature, which is how it should've been reported. Maybe next time, they will.
This post is as unhelpful to the OP as that one so
Wait, now this post is unhelpful. Time for memes.
They never come back and update. I always feel gypped.
I recently saw a post where the OP came back after a couple of years to yell at someone she felt insulted her. There's always hope.
People always pique my interest and then disappear.
Maybe OP is filing for divorce. Maybe her husband agreed to a compromise. Maybe she quit dieting. Will we ever know?
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Will you please stop with the "So"s. Nobody said that. You're making leaps of logic that are the kind of logic that...well, isn't logical.
She needs help, he helps her. When he needs help, she helps him.bennettinfinity wrote: »cindyangotti wrote: »The selfishness I am reading here is ridiculous. If any person I cared about came to me and asked for my support in anything they were trying to do to improve themselves I would give it in a heartbeat. I love them and want the best for them and wouldn't dream of hindering their success just to please myself. I can't even imagine me saying "sorry, this is your problem, not mine. You deal with your issues on your own because my poptart is more important to me than you." Thank God the people in my family are not like that!
Sincere question: how is it selfish for the husband to not make sacrifices in support of his wife's endeavors and not selfish for the wife to ask the husband to make the sacrifices?
These are not children who stomp their feet and yell, "It's not fair!" and demand their way until a parent comes in and settles the matter.
These are adults who live together and care about each other. That means there will be compromises in lots and lots of things.
It's not about who is right. It's about two people with different desires finding a way to be happy together.
so because the wife wants to go on a diet that the means that the husband can't enjoy the foods he likes in the comfort of his own home?
That is not a supportive environment, that is a dictatorship where the wife controls everything the husband does.
I get it. You don't think her husband should be asked to compromise. I disagree. We aren't going to agree, so we will just have to live with disagreeing again. I know it's okay by me and will trust that you're okay with it, too.
maybe you should go back and re-read early comments in the thread where people cleary said that and the OP herself said it.
so yea, it was said 0 -
I didn't say it. Your "So..." put words in my mouth that I didn't say and made no sense. It didn't follow.
Will you please stop with the "So"s. Nobody said that. You're making leaps of logic that are the kind of logic that...well, isn't logical.
She needs help, he helps her. When he needs help, she helps him.bennettinfinity wrote: »cindyangotti wrote: »The selfishness I am reading here is ridiculous. If any person I cared about came to me and asked for my support in anything they were trying to do to improve themselves I would give it in a heartbeat. I love them and want the best for them and wouldn't dream of hindering their success just to please myself. I can't even imagine me saying "sorry, this is your problem, not mine. You deal with your issues on your own because my poptart is more important to me than you." Thank God the people in my family are not like that!
Sincere question: how is it selfish for the husband to not make sacrifices in support of his wife's endeavors and not selfish for the wife to ask the husband to make the sacrifices?
These are not children who stomp their feet and yell, "It's not fair!" and demand their way until a parent comes in and settles the matter.
These are adults who live together and care about each other. That means there will be compromises in lots and lots of things.
It's not about who is right. It's about two people with different desires finding a way to be happy together.
so because the wife wants to go on a diet that the means that the husband can't enjoy the foods he likes in the comfort of his own home?
That is not a supportive environment, that is a dictatorship where the wife controls everything the husband does.
I get it. You don't think her husband should be asked to compromise. I disagree. We aren't going to agree, so we will just have to live with disagreeing again. I know it's okay by me and will trust that you're okay with it, too.
maybe you should go back and re-read early comments in the thread where people cleary said that and the OP herself said it.
so yea, it was said
I get it. You disagree. I am not changing my mind and you aren't changing yours.
There's no more to be done about that.
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My husband and I go grocery shopping together. He buys his food ... and I buy mine.
There's a yogurt he likes ... so he gets that one.
There's a yogurt I like ... so I get that one.
He likes full-fat cheese ... I like the light cheese.
He likes cheese and certain type of cracker I'm not that fond of as an after work snack.
I like cottage cheese and cucumber slices, and occasionally a different type of cracker that he doesn't particularly like.
He buys certain food for his lunches ... I buy different food for my lunches.
He's got bags of peanuts in the cupboard, but I can't eat those because I will painfully bloat up to the size of the Goodyear balloon. So that's one of his go-to snacks when he is hungry.
Even with fruit ... he buys a collection of fruit he likes, and I buy a collection of fruit I like.
this is what we do. he has a part of the counter and cupboards and fridge that is his and I have mine. we share the ice cream.
We share the dinner veggies.
But he doesn't eat my lunch veggies!!
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Even though I tell my husband to stop buying junk food, etc. Pop tarts, chips, sugary cereal he still does. If it is in the house I eventually cave and give in and eat it. I have had this conversation with him many times and he says he does support me and that I should be able to resist the foods. I don't know how to make it so clear to him it has to stop. Please give me some suggestions to stop my husband from bringing junk food in the housr.
Have him store his food in a hidden place you won't find it. If he's going to buy it then he needs to hide it. If he buys it and you don't know, even better. Then, you won't go looking for it. Honestly, fill up on high fiber foods and water, and you won't be hungry to eat his stuff.
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I think this thread is about done for but I'll put a thought out there anyway. The junk food doesn't just hurt through weight gain, it is unhealthy in many areas, from the processing, chemicals and preservatives to the calories and sugar. Weight is certainly a concern but so are other issues. If there are children and family commitments, don't we owe it to each other to be good examples and be around and healthy as long as possible? Not saying we should be perfect all the time, it's what we do regularly that has the most impact on our health. Our family has a single cabinet for processed foods and the rest of the kitchen we try to be as healthfully stocked as possible. And, when we go out we'll indulge. There is no right way for everyone, just what works for you as a whole body solution.0
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There will always be situations in your life where you will have junk food around you. Getting fit is an endless journey, there's no end. You have to learn the new approach to food, and stay loyal to your goals, but without imposing that on your husband or people around you. You can't freak out every time there's junk food around for the rest of your life. As for your current situation, act like you're roommates, you wouldn't eat your roommate's food, so look at it as something that he bought for himself and not for you. If that makes any sense? I am in college right now and it's pretty easy for me not to eat my roommate's tiramisu or nutella since it's HIS thing and he didn't buy it for me.
Another suggestion for this to work is don't split the cost of food if possible, you buy your own things, he buys his. Best of luck x0 -
Okay, two things. I can't count how many times I've read or heard "if you have a problem with whateverfoodstuff, keep it out of your home." This is standard, beginner level, easy mode diet advice, so I don't understand why everyone keeps acting like this is an unreasonable request on her part or keeps telling her to be an adult when she IS being an adult.
This is meant to apply, to a singular person; whom resides by themselves. It's unreasonable to expect a SO, family, roommates, etc., to conform to someone else's lifestyle changes. The grocery store that one shops at, isn't going to stop selling; anyone's trigger foods because of their inability, to control themselves.0 -
MondayJune22nd2015 wrote: »Okay, two things. I can't count how many times I've read or heard "if you have a problem with whateverfoodstuff, keep it out of your home." This is standard, beginner level, easy mode diet advice, so I don't understand why everyone keeps acting like this is an unreasonable request on her part or keeps telling her to be an adult when she IS being an adult.
This is meant to apply, to a singular person; whom resides by themselves. It's unreasonable to expect a SO, family, roommates, etc., to conform to someone else's lifestyle changes. The grocery store that one shops at, isn't going to stop selling; anyone's trigger foods because of their inability, to control themselves.
this.
for me its all part of the test. I need to get to a stage where i have all my loves in my place and be able to eat one and walk away simple.
lol, at the grocery store comment. I can imagine some people shaking each time they pass the snack section0 -
I think this thread is about done for but I'll put a thought out there anyway. The junk food doesn't just hurt through weight gain, it is unhealthy in many areas, from the processing, chemicals and preservatives to the calories and sugar. Weight is certainly a concern but so are other issues. If there are children and family commitments, don't we owe it to each other to be good examples and be around and healthy as long as possible? Not saying we should be perfect all the time, it's what we do regularly that has the most impact on our health. Our family has a single cabinet for processed foods and the rest of the kitchen we try to be as healthfully stocked as possible. And, when we go out we'll indulge. There is no right way for everyone, just what works for you as a whole body solution.
For me this is a lot of nope.
If and when I have children, I am going to teach them the beauty and wisdom of moderation. I am going to teach them that all food is welcome in their diet. I will allow them to make choices and remind them that no food is good or bad.
This. My kids already make comments like "cheese is bad for you". They are 4 and 6. I have no idea where they get this from. We try to teach them that there is no such thing as a bad food, but you can eat too much of any food and that can make you feel bad or not be as strong and healthy as you might be by making sure that you eat nutritious foods and the yummy foods as well. Putting things in some sort of special cabinet that teaches kids there is something inferior about those foods, I think, could lead to disordered thinking down the road.
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UltimateRBF wrote: »UltimateRBF wrote: »UltimateRBF wrote: »He should be supportive and not buy so much junk. In fact, he should stop eating it himself.If you are a food addict and can't stay away from your trigger foods, my opinion is that the household HAS to help you through this.
I am a food addict. My hubby loves junk food and lots of it, so I gave him my list of my 5 trigger foods that simply can't be in my house. If they are, he has to lock them in a briefcase that I don't know the combination. On the occasion he leaves them out, I told him that I must throw them away. It's just too difficult for me to be tempted. I gotta make ONE place in my life that's my safety zone. At work, I'm tortured with goodies and junk all day, every day.
If you had a drug addict or an alcoholic for a spouse or child, would you torture them with putting their drug in the house? I would think not.
Addicts need all the support we can get. We have to eat 3 times a day, every day and it's a challenge just to get through that some days. It's NOT just the addict's issue alone.
Your friendly dietitian
Jenn
hahaha
NO
I would like to know what part of this reply was against the TOS and as such was deemed flag worthy by someone...
I don't know who clicked it, but the "hahaha" comes off like you're laughing at the person, which is beyond rude and into insulting. Since you asked.
I was laughing at the statement, which is fairly obvious
People flag random things all the time on there. A flag doesnt mean much unless it's followed by a warning from a mod.0 -
I think this thread is about done for but I'll put a thought out there anyway. The junk food doesn't just hurt through weight gain, it is unhealthy in many areas, from the processing, chemicals and preservatives to the calories and sugar. Weight is certainly a concern but so are other issues. If there are children and family commitments, don't we owe it to each other to be good examples and be around and healthy as long as possible? Not saying we should be perfect all the time, it's what we do regularly that has the most impact on our health. Our family has a single cabinet for processed foods and the rest of the kitchen we try to be as healthfully stocked as possible. And, when we go out we'll indulge. There is no right way for everyone, just what works for you as a whole body solution.
For me this is a lot of nope.
If and when I have children, I am going to teach them the beauty and wisdom of moderation. I am going to teach them that all food is welcome in their diet. I will allow them to make choices and remind them that no food is good or bad.
This, although I don't want kids. Much easier to not mess up other humans when you don't have any of your own.
Moderation and an overall balanced diet are my goal. And speaking of, I need to log my "sock it to me" cake I just had for breakfast...0 -
I think this thread is about done for but I'll put a thought out there anyway. The junk food doesn't just hurt through weight gain, it is unhealthy in many areas, from the processing, chemicals and preservatives to the calories and sugar. Weight is certainly a concern but so are other issues. If there are children and family commitments, don't we owe it to each other to be good examples and be around and healthy as long as possible? Not saying we should be perfect all the time, it's what we do regularly that has the most impact on our health. Our family has a single cabinet for processed foods and the rest of the kitchen we try to be as healthfully stocked as possible. And, when we go out we'll indulge. There is no right way for everyone, just what works for you as a whole body solution.
For me this is a lot of nope.
If and when I have children, I am going to teach them the beauty and wisdom of moderation. I am going to teach them that all food is welcome in their diet. I will allow them to make choices and remind them that no food is good or bad.
Good luck with that. When my son was 3 he woke up one morning and decided he didn't like meat and refused to eat it. Obviously at 3 there was no declaration or anything. He just continued to say "no". He also refused to eat eggs, peanut butter and all fruits. The only things he would eat were yogurt and vegetables. While that might sound ideal, it wasn't. Beans? No. Rice? No. Milk? Nope. Cheese? No. It was maddening.
Poor kid lived on Breyers Fruit on the Bottom yogurt, broccoli and tomatoes for a year until he woke up one morning asking for a hamburger. After that morning he just started eating everything. The relief was immeasurable.
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