Well this is awk..

124

Replies

  • PantalaNagaPampa
    PantalaNagaPampa Posts: 1,031 Member
    So, I'm kneeling there with this crucifix *kitten* in my bum, the crucifx handle breakds off, leaving the *kitten* inserted, I'm just staring at the crucifix in my hand, my wife walks in, says how moving it is to see me on my knees parying, but why am I naked... and that was only the third most awkward 10 minute conversation of my life.
  • ruth3698
    ruth3698 Posts: 305 Member
    I like midget porn.

    I like midget tranny porn.

    hmm I can see why....you get your lesbian,penis and midget fix all in one go! *googling it now*
  • JaneDough_
    JaneDough_ Posts: 301 Member
    I went to my friends house at 12am for some all night halo. He was grounded so I had to sneak in. At 2am or so his dad starts coming downstairs so I run into the dining room and hide under a table. His dad then tells him its late and to go to bed. Then his dad decides to watch tv. So here I am stuck in the kitchen with his dad no more than 15 feet away from me so I couldn't leave. While Im texting my friend (who went upstairs) asking what to do I hear the telltale infamous music that only plays during a porno. His dad watched it for an hour or so, my friend not knowing what to do, and me under the dining room table. For those wondering, I could see the tv so I decided to watch too
  • MizTerry
    MizTerry Posts: 3,763 Member
    I'm TNT
  • diodelcibo
    diodelcibo Posts: 2,564 Member
    Please inbox me the size of your vagina. K, Thanks!

    Junk pics sent.

    Nice size, great width. Depth is very impressive 10/10 wb

    Thanks bro, looking quite thick, solid ,tight yourself.
  • Babeskeez
    Babeskeez Posts: 606 Member
    So when girls run and their tampon falls out, does that mean they have a loose vagina?
  • FootballGamer58
    FootballGamer58 Posts: 1,310 Member
    So when girls run and their tampon falls out, does that mean they have a loose vagina?

    no, when you have to shove three in at a time, thats when you know
  • UsedToBeHusky
    UsedToBeHusky Posts: 15,228 Member
    I went to my friends house at 12am for some all night halo. He was grounded so I had to sneak in. At 2am or so his dad starts coming downstairs so I run into the dining room and hide under a table. His dad then tells him its late and to go to bed. Then his dad decides to watch tv. So here I am stuck in the kitchen with his dad no more than 15 feet away from me so I couldn't leave. While Im texting my friend (who went upstairs) asking what to do I hear the telltale infamous music that only plays during a porno. His dad watched it for an hour or so, my friend not knowing what to do, and me under the dining room table. For those wondering, I could see the tv so I decided to watch too

    Oh you dirty little bird! :laugh:
  • harvo
    harvo Posts: 4,676 Member
    Please inbox me the size of your vagina. K, Thanks!

    Junk pics sent.

    Nice size, great width. Depth is very impressive 10/10 wb

    Well played
  • SDkitty
    SDkitty Posts: 446 Member
    That awkward moment when you accidentally elbow the woman standing waaaay too close to you in the check out line in the boob.

    BOOYAH!
  • Mainebikerchick
    Mainebikerchick Posts: 1,573 Member
    I went to my friends house at 12am for some all night halo. He was grounded so I had to sneak in. At 2am or so his dad starts coming downstairs so I run into the dining room and hide under a table. His dad then tells him its late and to go to bed. Then his dad decides to watch tv. So here I am stuck in the kitchen with his dad no more than 15 feet away from me so I couldn't leave. While Im texting my friend (who went upstairs) asking what to do I hear the telltale infamous music that only plays during a porno. His dad watched it for an hour or so, my friend not knowing what to do, and me under the dining room table. For those wondering, I could see the tv so I decided to watch too

    Oh you dirty little bird! :laugh:

    You KNOW you like it!!!! :bigsmile:
  • UsedToBeHusky
    UsedToBeHusky Posts: 15,228 Member
    I went to my friends house at 12am for some all night halo. He was grounded so I had to sneak in. At 2am or so his dad starts coming downstairs so I run into the dining room and hide under a table. His dad then tells him its late and to go to bed. Then his dad decides to watch tv. So here I am stuck in the kitchen with his dad no more than 15 feet away from me so I couldn't leave. While Im texting my friend (who went upstairs) asking what to do I hear the telltale infamous music that only plays during a porno. His dad watched it for an hour or so, my friend not knowing what to do, and me under the dining room table. For those wondering, I could see the tv so I decided to watch too

    Oh you dirty little bird! :laugh:

    You KNOW you like it!!!! :bigsmile:

    I do. :drinker:
  • edge_dragoncaller
    edge_dragoncaller Posts: 826 Member
    So I'm at Walmart the other day and going through the checkout line and I have a Pregnancy Test, a GPS system, Garbage Bags, and a shovel....
  • The_Enginerd
    The_Enginerd Posts: 3,982 Member
    I really should have been wearing a diaper when I read this thread. Mingecrackers just made me pea myself.
    One time a friend texted me and told me he called out my name while having sex with his girlfriend. She confirmed he wasnt joking.

    Lmao! That is akward!

    Yeah, he said they couldnt finish becaue she started laughing so hard and the joke was worth it. :laugh:

    Would have been better if they finished right there...
  • BikerGirlElaine
    BikerGirlElaine Posts: 1,631 Member
    So I'm at Walmart the other day and going through the checkout line and I have a Pregnancy Test, a GPS system, Garbage Bags, and a shovel....

    :laugh:
  • kennethmgreen
    kennethmgreen Posts: 1,759 Member
    That awkward moment when you accidentally elbow the woman standing waaaay too close to you in the check out line in the boob.

    BOOYAH!
    That was no accident, and you know it.
  • JaneDough_
    JaneDough_ Posts: 301 Member
    I went to my friends house at 12am for some all night halo. He was grounded so I had to sneak in. At 2am or so his dad starts coming downstairs so I run into the dining room and hide under a table. His dad then tells him its late and to go to bed. Then his dad decides to watch tv. So here I am stuck in the kitchen with his dad no more than 15 feet away from me so I couldn't leave. While Im texting my friend (who went upstairs) asking what to do I hear the telltale infamous music that only plays during a porno. His dad watched it for an hour or so, my friend not knowing what to do, and me under the dining room table. For those wondering, I could see the tv so I decided to watch too

    Oh you dirty little bird! :laugh:

    You KNOW you like it!!!! :bigsmile:

    I do. :drinker:

    :wink:
  • jmc0806
    jmc0806 Posts: 1,444 Member
    Please inbox me the size of your penis. K, thanks.

    I thought that was in the rules for friend requests already?
  • jamiesillimandunn
    jamiesillimandunn Posts: 270 Member
    Walking in on your immediately exed boyfriend getting it on with his AUNT ...yeah that really happened !!! BARF!!! Bahaha
  • Cp731
    Cp731 Posts: 3,195 Member
    When people are talking to me, when I get bored of the conversation I like to reach out my hand and close their eyes like you would on a corpse

    I lol-ed at this
  • basslinewild
    basslinewild Posts: 294 Member
    When me and my partner are getting it on, just when they are about to finish I like to scream EA GAMES followed by me whispering 'Challenge everything'
    :laugh: :laugh:
  • jamiesillimandunn
    jamiesillimandunn Posts: 270 Member
    Being hit by a vehicle on your bike then realizing it was a short bus !! Yup that happened too !
  • weevil66
    weevil66 Posts: 600 Member
    That awkward moment when you accidentally elbow the woman standing waaaay too close to you in the check out line in the boob.

    BOOYAH!

    I accidentally elbowed a woman in the boob because she was right behind me when I was getting a shopping cart.
  • amonkey794
    amonkey794 Posts: 651 Member
    Tag for mingecrackers!!!!
  • SakuraRose13
    SakuraRose13 Posts: 621 Member
    When me and my partner are getting it on, just when they are about to finish I like to scream EA GAMES followed by me whispering 'Challenge everything'

    I'm dying here, Im laughing so hard :laugh: ...
  • whierd
    whierd Posts: 14,025 Member
    Walking in on your immediately exed boyfriend getting it on with his AUNT ...yeah that really happened !!! BARF!!! Bahaha

    Well now, someone has a great taste in men.
  • jamiesillimandunn
    jamiesillimandunn Posts: 270 Member
    Walking in on your immediately exed boyfriend getting it on with his AUNT ...yeah that really happened !!! BARF!!! Bahaha

    Well now, someone has a great taste in men.






    Even more AWKWARD !!! Gosh!!
  • Prettymisssparkles
    Prettymisssparkles Posts: 1,274 Member
    age 28
    height 5'2"
    cw 144
    gw 115

    Would like some twin friends that would be so awesome! <3

    Edit= Oh crap wrong thread...aww man, how awkward. Fail..
  • heytherelameman
    heytherelameman Posts: 76 Member
    You guys are hilarious!
  • JDySart777
    JDySart777 Posts: 270 Member
    When gettin' it on with my wife, I'm wanna do it up and up, then roll her over and go down and down. I push to the left, then right, then left, then right, On her (B)ack, smack her (A), then her (B)ack again and Smack her (A). Only then do I select to start.

    When we do it like this...I feel like I'm in god mode.

    images?q=tbn:ANd9GcRFIYcOi-3ArDbWobc2-pzIFWVyZ3X3BrbncVSvGU3HDnzwI5cfcfT_5xJ7Ew


    *edited for grammar..probably made it worse.

    Winner! :drinker:

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