"You're really pretty, but...

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  • slimdownsteph
    slimdownsteph Posts: 71 Member
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    People should realize that comments like that are damaging to others. No one wants to hear they have a pretty face or other great attributes, yet they are too FAT. They need to lose WEIGHT. What business is it of theirs what your physical appearance is? Why do people feel the need to comment?


    I absolutely hate it when others comment on my physical appearance, whether good or bad. Judgements. They are never productive. People must be aware of what they say, and try to be more compassionate toward people. And mind their own business.

    I have so many stories just like yours, it's crazy. They really do stick with. I totally agree with your last paragraph with being more aware of what we say and being more compassionate.
  • salladeve
    salladeve Posts: 1,053 Member
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    I'll never forget a few years ago I was having dinner with my Dad, and a man he used to work with came over to talk to us. My Dad introduced us, and we talked for a while. When he got up to leave he said to my Dad "it's too bad your daughter is so heavy, she has such a pretty face". Um, thanks?

    I had heard it before, but it never fails to hurt. Why do they feel they have to say anything? I'll never understand.
  • slimdownsteph
    slimdownsteph Posts: 71 Member
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    The lesson I get here: never compliment anyone for any aspect of physical appearance. It will invariably be taken as an insult, and you will be called a douche-nozzle on an internet forum.

    Ya learn something new every day. ;)
  • weevil66
    weevil66 Posts: 600 Member
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    The lesson I get here: never compliment anyone for any aspect of physical appearance. It will invariably be taken as an insult, and you will be called a douche-nozzle on an internet forum.

    What kind of bun is that? It looks yumtastic
  • dwalt15110
    dwalt15110 Posts: 246 Member
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    My favorite remark that was made to me was "When you open your mouth to sing, people forget what you look like."
  • garber6th
    garber6th Posts: 1,894 Member
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    My favorite remark that was made to me was "When you open your mouth to sing, people forget what you look like."

    Wow.

    7396232.png
  • digby74
    digby74 Posts: 1
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    I have heard this one over and over again in my life... One guy told me I could 'get away' with being fat because I had a pretty face..
    WOW... needless to say he didnt stay in my life too much longer after that one...
    My fiance loves me even though I have gained at least 10kg since we met...
    Wipe the slate clean in your mind about beautiful and just get out there, life is short- focus on health not a number on the tag of your dress.. Smile, and let a sparkle shine from your eyes! Now thats true beauty :)
  • tubzzy77
    tubzzy77 Posts: 104 Member
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    But....but....I'm Bulking!
  • MPHGirl424
    MPHGirl424 Posts: 2 Member
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    A few months ago, I showed a few friends a picture of me at my skinniest. Their response was, "Wow...you were so pretty then!". I don't think they quite understood how their reaction made me feel.
  • petkova
    petkova Posts: 72
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    My response would be something along the lines of ... "Well, I can change my weight when I decide to, but you really can't change the fact that you are an idiot" :)))
  • MJ_Watson
    MJ_Watson Posts: 180 Member
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    Ohhh, God, yes. Like that BS: "You have such a pretty face," compliment I would sometimes get from older relatives/fellow churchgoers that was then followed by a comment hinting that I needed to lose more weight so I'd be "even prettier."

    One of the worst "compliments" I've ever gotten was having a guy tell me in my senior year of high school, "Man, you used to be so HOT in freshman year." USED TO. Nice. Also, in freshman year I had an eating disorder and was eating about 300-500 calories a day in addition to being on Ephedrine weight loss pills supplied by the "qualified" nutritionist my parents were taking me to. So, thanks. Thanks a lot.

    Luckily, haven't had any of those kinds of backhanded compliments in years. Recently I did have a coworker tell me that I've gotten "so much more beautiful" lately, but she speaks English as a second language and would never try to insult me, so I took it as the compliment it was intended as! At least someone's finally said something about the weight loss!! :wink:
  • Mario_Az
    Mario_Az Posts: 1,331 Member
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    all you ladies look good beauty is in the eye of the beholder everyone has their likes and dislike that is why we are all different to each his own :)
  • lilcutemonkees
    lilcutemonkees Posts: 83 Member
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    I used to get the 'you're pretty and nice but I just don't like you that way' alot going through school. Majority of the time it was because I was overweight. I only got bullied about my weight by my sister but this is the closest thing I got outside of family that seriously hurt me.
  • YearsWorthOfFAT
    YearsWorthOfFAT Posts: 210
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    I simply said 'Uh.......thanks' and dwelled on it at home xD.
  • dolcegl25
    dolcegl25 Posts: 7 Member
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    ohh i hate it! , is like why you say something in the first place! shut up!!!... depend of who say so, but i think my face shows that im not happy
  • Nicolee_2014
    Nicolee_2014 Posts: 1,572 Member
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    You can lose the fat but you can't change an ugly face or heart!
    Never bothered me when I heard it because it mainly came from family members.
  • SilverLotusGirl
    SilverLotusGirl Posts: 537 Member
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    I don't like getting the comment but not everyone likes bigger girls and I don't think someone is an automatic dbag if they don't or if I'm too big, dark, short, smart, plain, or whatever else for their preference.
  • Thena81
    Thena81 Posts: 1,265 Member
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    thats fuel baby!!'
    i use it to my advantage
    i know how hard i work
  • kindasortachewy
    kindasortachewy Posts: 1,084 Member
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    Before I stated losing weight my aunt told me ' You look just like your sisters, just bigger and not as pretty, but they are older than you, maybe you'll grow into it?'


    She is the only relative NOT invited to my wedding, and I hope she knows why.
  • MsJulielicious
    MsJulielicious Posts: 708 Member
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    thats fuel baby!!'
    i use it to my advantage
    i know how hard i work
    Hell yes! this is why we are friends. your attitude = awesomeness
    Myself, before i lost the weight...
    had a man tell me "right now you're golden, you could be platinum 10 lbs skinnier"... :noway:
    **** you bro, wait... nope

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