Dealing with FOOD DIARY police

pearso21123

WinoGelato wrote: »

125goals wrote: »

WinoGelato wrote: »

125goals wrote: »

Me being me, my first thought would be that they are just trying to help, give me some suggestions- if they are private messaging me it's just probably important to them that I read their message because they think their suggestion is golden and can really benefit me, that's all. It is myfitnesspal after all and isn't that we add people as friends? To help each other out with suggestions ect? I wouldn't think off the bat that these people are being nasty to me.

Not saying you're not entitled to how you feel, just got a different view on it.

That's not why I add people as friends. I add people that I connect with in the forums, or that are also on mutual friends lists. Most of my friends are because of common personality types (sarcastic sense of humor, etc). I find many of them very supportive and motivational, but unless I ask them for suggestions about something, then no, I don't actually expect them to offer any input on my food choices, my exercise, etc.

Shouldn't be surprised if they do. Its a health and fitness website. That's why mfp has a comment section also, for people to comment under.

Personally, I have Facebook that's for sh*ts and giggles not mfp, I expect people to give me their suggestions....Unless their being rude and demanding, and pushing their views on me wouldn't feel any type of way.

Meh - I think we are just having different MFP experiences. If I need help, I will ask for it, and I will get it - the people on my friends list are extremely knowledgeable about diet, exercise, health, etc and many of them have been astoundingly successful. But I'm doing fine, and they know it. So they aren't going to tell me that I shouldn't have had a piece of chocolate after lunch because it might hinder my goals, because it won't. They aren't going to tell me that I should be weighing my food with a digital scale, because even though that is probably the number one piece of advice that is shared with regards to how to be successful - they know I'm doing ok without it and they know that I know that is something I could do if I wanted to be more accurate. They aren't going to tell me that instead of doing circuit training with light weights I should be lifting heavy things, because they know that I have been considering it but haven't worked myself up to that yet. So no, I wouldn't expect unsolicited advice from any of them. I've been here 1000 days as of today and have yet to get a piece of unwelcome, unsolicited advice. Or any creeper PMs either. Darn, maybe I am doing something wrong!

I actually appreciate the advice, if it's constructive of course and not just flat-out criticizing. Otherwise, what's the point of having your diary open? I'm new to all of this so I appreciate people who've been at this longer than me pointing out ways I could improve. One of my friends pointed out to me that my iron was consistently very low. I reviewed my diary and sure enough, she was right. That mattered to me because when I was younger I was anemic, but I hadn't learned to really look at my macros yet so I hadn't even realized. Now, I take a multi-vitamin every morning so I don't have to worry about the number in MFP, but if she hadn't pointed it out I probably wouldn't have ever realized on my own.

fuelednfit

I think we all have our own way to be successful in our weight loss journey. When you find a successful way of eating you are so happy and enthusiast about it you want to share it with the whole word.. it might not be with the idea of converting anyone but just passing on the info to someone else. Hey BTW here is what I do and I find it easy to follow and I got positive results. It might or might not be a good option for you but at least you know it works for some people. I had friends comment like you said and I think they just tried to share their own experience just in case I could benefit from it. I wouldn't delete. I might not want to adopt their diet but I think if they took time to pm me they are friends that care and they are worth keeping

CoffeeNCardio

robertw486 wrote: »

It would be easier if he had a block function.

You made me think of this:)

scolaris

Good advice everybody!
And YES, I ate steaming hot hand cut organic potato chips off a food truck tonight. They were glorious! Have at me! ;-)

robertw486

scolaris wrote: »

Good advice everybody!
And YES, I ate steaming hot hand cut organic potato chips off a food truck tonight. They were glorious! Have at me! ;-)

If they weren't with tacos... well I'm not sure things are going to work out!

Sometimes I either eat light or "bank" some exercise calories to hit the food trucks at a local brewery. Well worth it every time!

scolaris

They were with POSOLE.... Going taco free tonight... Sowing my wild oats...

WinoGelato

pearso21123 wrote: »

WinoGelato wrote: »

125goals wrote: »

WinoGelato wrote: »

125goals wrote: »

Me being me, my first thought would be that they are just trying to help, give me some suggestions- if they are private messaging me it's just probably important to them that I read their message because they think their suggestion is golden and can really benefit me, that's all. It is myfitnesspal after all and isn't that we add people as friends? To help each other out with suggestions ect? I wouldn't think off the bat that these people are being nasty to me.

Not saying you're not entitled to how you feel, just got a different view on it.

That's not why I add people as friends. I add people that I connect with in the forums, or that are also on mutual friends lists. Most of my friends are because of common personality types (sarcastic sense of humor, etc). I find many of them very supportive and motivational, but unless I ask them for suggestions about something, then no, I don't actually expect them to offer any input on my food choices, my exercise, etc.

Shouldn't be surprised if they do. Its a health and fitness website. That's why mfp has a comment section also, for people to comment under.

Personally, I have Facebook that's for sh*ts and giggles not mfp, I expect people to give me their suggestions....Unless their being rude and demanding, and pushing their views on me wouldn't feel any type of way.

Meh - I think we are just having different MFP experiences. If I need help, I will ask for it, and I will get it - the people on my friends list are extremely knowledgeable about diet, exercise, health, etc and many of them have been astoundingly successful. But I'm doing fine, and they know it. So they aren't going to tell me that I shouldn't have had a piece of chocolate after lunch because it might hinder my goals, because it won't. They aren't going to tell me that I should be weighing my food with a digital scale, because even though that is probably the number one piece of advice that is shared with regards to how to be successful - they know I'm doing ok without it and they know that I know that is something I could do if I wanted to be more accurate. They aren't going to tell me that instead of doing circuit training with light weights I should be lifting heavy things, because they know that I have been considering it but haven't worked myself up to that yet. So no, I wouldn't expect unsolicited advice from any of them. I've been here 1000 days as of today and have yet to get a piece of unwelcome, unsolicited advice. Or any creeper PMs either. Darn, maybe I am doing something wrong!

I actually appreciate the advice, if it's constructive of course and not just flat-out criticizing. Otherwise, what's the point of having your diary open? I'm new to all of this so I appreciate people who've been at this longer than me pointing out ways I could improve. One of my friends pointed out to me that my iron was consistently very low. I reviewed my diary and sure enough, she was right. That mattered to me because when I was younger I was anemic, but I hadn't learned to really look at my macros yet so I hadn't even realized. Now, I take a multi-vitamin every morning so I don't have to worry about the number in MFP, but if she hadn't pointed it out I probably wouldn't have ever realized on my own.

The advice you got sounds constructive and helpful and probably tactfully worded. It's the "you sure all that chocolate is a good idea?" Kind of passive aggressive posts that I think the OP is referring to.

debrakgoogins

I have been known to make a comment if I see a trend of eating way too little. I commented on a friends post the other day because the only food she had eaten for the entire day was a salad with no dressing and a few snapea crisps. The rest of her calories were various supplements. I had an eating disorder as a teenager and that just scares me. Itherw

VykkDraygoVPR wrote: »

125goals wrote: »

VykkDraygoVPR wrote: »

ohmscheeks wrote: »

So... Is this like one of those "things that make you irrationally angry" threads? It's just a food/diet suggestion on a diet and exercise website, so...

I don't walk up to people in a restaurant and tell them what to eat. Should I? It's just rude.

That's different.

How? It's no different. Unless someone asks for your advice beforehand, it's exactly the same.

It's different because you are "friends" here who have become friends for a mutual goal of being healthier. In a restaurant, they are strangers and you have no idea whether they care about their health or not. Now, if someone who isn't a friend finds my diary and makes a comment, that's completely different.

Asher_Ethan

Every once and awhile I'll get those comments as well. But I know what I'm doing so I usually ignore them. I leave my diary open to friends because I do have some friends in real life on here that are always curious how I stay so fit and have a treat every once and awhile.

laurenpjokl

For me, the purpose of having an open food diary is that it gives me just a little bit of extra motivation if I know people will be looking. I only really look at other people's food diaries because it gives me ideas. If I do see something off, (for example, very low calorie intake or very limited fruit or veg,) I sometimes comment, but try to make it as positive as possible, and clear that it's just a friendly suggestion and not "policing".