married chit-chatters?
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My wife and I are heading to her parents' house tomorrow, in Racine, WI. We are dropping off our boys there and taking a train to Chicago for 2 nights of just the two of us. Then we go back to Racine where one of the largest 4th of July parades in the US is! Should be pretty nice for a 3 year old and a 6 month old!0
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Hey Herold, nice deal! That is a weekend for which to look forward! I am particularly envious of the parade, that sounds awesome!!0
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Lonestar, the parade is about 4 hours long, not including the 45 minute pre-parade in which everything with a siren that is within 50 miles of Racine must go through. Also, for two little boys in Wisconsin, the parade of Case farm equipment is pretty impressive!1
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My son went through the equipment stage and it was so fun watching him get excited about trucks, planes and anything loud and noisy. You guys are going to have a blast!0
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Lonestar5715 wrote: »That sounds good too BinaryPulsar, is your daughter a bookworm? What genre does she like best? Is Canada Day a holiday that most people have off in Canada?
Yeah, she reads a ton. She likes a lot of fiction. One example is this series called Warriors. It's about cats. She also likes to read about cats in general. She reads a lot of series about animals or magic. Yeah, Canada day is like the Fourth of July. I think a lot of people get the day off. There are fireworks. And sometimes events at the mall with free cake (for Canada's birthday). Technically my husband has the day off, but it's difficult for him to take days off because he is a scientist and has so much work, so he will work a half day in the morning and come home at lunch.1 -
BinaryPulsar wrote: »Lonestar5715 wrote: »That sounds good too BinaryPulsar, is your daughter a bookworm? What genre does she like best? Is Canada Day a holiday that most people have off in Canada?
Yeah, she reads a ton. She likes a lot of fiction. One example is this series called Warriors. It's about cats. She also likes to read about cats in general. She reads a lot of series about animals or magic. Yeah, Canada day is like the Fourth of July. I think a lot of people get the day off. There are fireworks. And sometimes events at the mall with free cake (for Canada's birthday). Technically my husband has the day off, but it's difficult for him to take days off because he is a scientist and has so much work, so he will work a half day in the morning and come home at lunch.
Reading is a fantastic escape for kids and such a springboard for learning. Thanks for the Canada Day details, now I know :-) And that is interesting about your husband's work, I imagine even when he is away from his job his mind is still engaged in what he is doing.1 -
Lonestar5715 wrote: »BinaryPulsar wrote: »Lonestar5715 wrote: »That sounds good too BinaryPulsar, is your daughter a bookworm? What genre does she like best? Is Canada Day a holiday that most people have off in Canada?
Yeah, she reads a ton. She likes a lot of fiction. One example is this series called Warriors. It's about cats. She also likes to read about cats in general. She reads a lot of series about animals or magic. Yeah, Canada day is like the Fourth of July. I think a lot of people get the day off. There are fireworks. And sometimes events at the mall with free cake (for Canada's birthday). Technically my husband has the day off, but it's difficult for him to take days off because he is a scientist and has so much work, so he will work a half day in the morning and come home at lunch.
Reading is a fantastic escape for kids and such a springboard for learning. Thanks for the Canada Day details, now I know :-) And that is interesting about your husband's work, I imagine even when he is away from his job his mind is still engaged in what he is doing.
Yes, definitely. Lol. He even talks in his sleep about science and asks me to do things science related. It's hilarious! Or he will tell me he is having difficult feelings. So, I ask why. And it's something about what he is working on or even a new science idea he wants to work on or write a paper about, but doesn't have time for. He sometimes stays up late working on science or writing about science. He is a plasma physicist. It's like me with dancing. Dance is my work and my recreation. Science is his work and his recreation.1 -
Standard BBQ stuff then off to Vegas all next week.1
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BinaryPulsar wrote: »Lonestar5715 wrote: »BinaryPulsar wrote: »Lonestar5715 wrote: »That sounds good too BinaryPulsar, is your daughter a bookworm? What genre does she like best? Is Canada Day a holiday that most people have off in Canada?
Yeah, she reads a ton. She likes a lot of fiction. One example is this series called Warriors. It's about cats. She also likes to read about cats in general. She reads a lot of series about animals or magic. Yeah, Canada day is like the Fourth of July. I think a lot of people get the day off. There are fireworks. And sometimes events at the mall with free cake (for Canada's birthday). Technically my husband has the day off, but it's difficult for him to take days off because he is a scientist and has so much work, so he will work a half day in the morning and come home at lunch.
Reading is a fantastic escape for kids and such a springboard for learning. Thanks for the Canada Day details, now I know :-) And that is interesting about your husband's work, I imagine even when he is away from his job his mind is still engaged in what he is doing.
Yes, definitely. Lol. He even talks in his sleep about science and asks me to do things science related. It's hilarious! Or he will tell me he is having difficult feelings. So, I ask why. And it's something about what he is working on or even a new science idea he wants to work on or write a paper about, but doesn't have time for. He sometimes stays up late working on science or writing about science. He is a plasma physicist. It's like me with dancing. Dance is my work and my recreation. Science is his work and his recreation.
It sounds like you must have some very interesting conversations in your home lol. Do you each know enough about the other's passions that you are able to talk about them and share their interest?
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JenniferSchaffer1 wrote: »@mangamaday I've never failed not to finish it because it's always so easy.. LOL it's meanly in place so I don't forget any basic chores..Maybe I should make this a little clearer so it don't sound like abuse you see I had some head trauma and I forget things a lot so using a list helps me remember to do things so basically he does it to help me out.... so the list may look like this
TO DO LIST
MAKE BED
DO DISHES
SWEEP FLOORS
PICK UP LIVING ROOM
CLEAN BATHROOM
MAKE DINNER
TAKE MEDS
REMEMBER TO EAT LUNCH
TAKE TRASH OUT
CLEAN LITER BOXES
FEED AND WATER CATS
DO LAUNDRY
MAKE TEA
No offense... But that sounds like a list I would leave my children... I, on the other hand am an adult and can decide what needs to be done on my own.
Sounds demeaning to me... But hey, if it works for you...0 -
Party at the in-laws house on Monday. I'm in charge of bringing appetizers...should be fun. Already got my outfit picked out, so I'm ready to go!0
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Guns_N_Buns wrote: »Party at the in-laws house on Monday. I'm in charge of bringing appetizers...should be fun. Already got my outfit picked out, so I'm ready to go!
What do you have in mind for the appetizers? Funny how you have your outfit chosen and I wonder what's to eat? lol0 -
I was thinking about doing these:
and I think the hubs wants to bring his "famous" chili. He made chili once for a Thanksgiving appetizer and everyone ate it like it was going out of style and were too full to eat the dinner I spent all day making.
Needless to say, he doesn't let me live that down and tries to bring his chili to every event we go to. 3 -
Guns_N_Buns wrote: »I was thinking about doing these:
and I think the hubs wants to bring his "famous" chili. He made chili once for a Thanksgiving appetizer and everyone ate it like it was going out of style and were too full to eat the dinner I spent all day making. Needless to say, he doesn't let me live that down and tries to bring his chili to every event we go to.
Those appetizers look divine! And thanks for sharing the story about Thanksgiving and your hubby's chili.
I can totally imagine that happening and the frustration that must cause after you worked so hard on the dinner.
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JenniferSchaffer1 wrote: »@mangamaday I've never failed not to finish it because it's always so easy.. LOL it's meanly in place so I don't forget any basic chores..Maybe I should make this a little clearer so it don't sound like abuse you see I had some head trauma and I forget things a lot so using a list helps me remember to do things so basically he does it to help me out.... so the list may look like this
TO DO LIST
MAKE BED
DO DISHES
SWEEP FLOORS
PICK UP LIVING ROOM
CLEAN BATHROOM
MAKE DINNER
TAKE MEDS
REMEMBER TO EAT LUNCH
TAKE TRASH OUT
CLEAN LITER BOXES
FEED AND WATER CATS
DO LAUNDRY
MAKE TEA
No offense... But that sounds like a list I would leave my children... I, on the other hand am an adult and can decide what needs to be done on my own.
Sounds demeaning to me... But hey, if it works for you...
She said she has head trauma.2 -
Lonestar5715 wrote: »BinaryPulsar wrote: »Lonestar5715 wrote: »BinaryPulsar wrote: »Lonestar5715 wrote: »That sounds good too BinaryPulsar, is your daughter a bookworm? What genre does she like best? Is Canada Day a holiday that most people have off in Canada?
Yeah, she reads a ton. She likes a lot of fiction. One example is this series called Warriors. It's about cats. She also likes to read about cats in general. She reads a lot of series about animals or magic. Yeah, Canada day is like the Fourth of July. I think a lot of people get the day off. There are fireworks. And sometimes events at the mall with free cake (for Canada's birthday). Technically my husband has the day off, but it's difficult for him to take days off because he is a scientist and has so much work, so he will work a half day in the morning and come home at lunch.
Reading is a fantastic escape for kids and such a springboard for learning. Thanks for the Canada Day details, now I know :-) And that is interesting about your husband's work, I imagine even when he is away from his job his mind is still engaged in what he is doing.
Yes, definitely. Lol. He even talks in his sleep about science and asks me to do things science related. It's hilarious! Or he will tell me he is having difficult feelings. So, I ask why. And it's something about what he is working on or even a new science idea he wants to work on or write a paper about, but doesn't have time for. He sometimes stays up late working on science or writing about science. He is a plasma physicist. It's like me with dancing. Dance is my work and my recreation. Science is his work and his recreation.
It sounds like you must have some very interesting conversations in your home lol. Do you each know enough about the other's passions that you are able to talk about them and share their interest?
Yes, definitely. We met in college. I went because I wanted to major in dance and study science. He went because he wanted to major in math/science and do art. He is very creative, good at drawing/painting, and did sculpture, life size puppets (put on a show as well), set design and props for dance/theatre, juggles, rides a unicycle, dances with me and understands and respects dance. I love science and am also very science oriented. Physics for him and biology for me. The conversations are never boring, and I love learning new things. In college I even took a class that was a combination of physics and dance and my first advisor was the physics teacher. The type of science he does is creative because he is developing a new energy form.1 -
Wow, @Lonestar5715! That food is beautiful! I used to do similar things, but I run out of energy so quickly that I don't do special foods anymore. I'm hoping that's going to change -- soon!1
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JenniferSchaffer1 wrote: »@mangamaday I've never failed not to finish it because it's always so easy.. LOL it's meanly in place so I don't forget any basic chores..Maybe I should make this a little clearer so it don't sound like abuse you see I had some head trauma and I forget things a lot so using a list helps me remember to do things so basically he does it to help me out.... so the list may look like this
TO DO LIST
MAKE BED
DO DISHES
SWEEP FLOORS
PICK UP LIVING ROOM
CLEAN BATHROOM
MAKE DINNER
TAKE MEDS
REMEMBER TO EAT LUNCH
TAKE TRASH OUT
CLEAN LITER BOXES
FEED AND WATER CATS
DO LAUNDRY
MAKE TEA
No offense... But that sounds like a list I would leave my children... I, on the other hand am an adult and can decide what needs to be done on my own.
Sounds demeaning to me... But hey, if it works for you...
Please don't let anyone here make you feel bad. I think it is wonderful that your husband understands your needs and is willing to be helpful and not an *kitten* that makes you feel inferior and less than the powerful women you were before your accident.yoy. Good for him and you.
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I don't think I have seen the cheating threads. I did see the cyber girlfriend one. Yeah, cheating is sad. I guess different people have different tolerance levels. If it's a good relationship and some minor thing (like non-physical, they flirted online or something) then I hope people could be adults about it and move on together (as long as it's not a frequent occurrence or an addiction or something truly disruptive). But, a physical affair would be difficult to deal with. But, worst is serial cheating. Sometimes cheating could be a sign something is wrong in the relationship. And sometimes it can be fixed, other times not. Depends how intrinsic it is or if it's just difficult times in life. Other times it's just a flaw in the person cheating. Sometimes the cheater has worse behaviors than just cheating. They are abusive as well. I know someone that was in a difficult relationship. She cheated. Relationship is long over (husband died actually). She is in a new relationship. She still feels judged. People say, "Once a cheater, always a cheater". Life is more complex than that. So, I try not to judge harshly without knowing the actual facts0
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BinaryPulsar wrote: »So, I try not to judge harshly without knowing the actual facts
I have finally learned this lesson the hard way. I would add that even once the facts are known it is impossible to understand the impact a particular set of circumstances has on another person or even ourselves until we are in the same situation.
In the past year I have done things that throughout my life I have condemned in others. Seeing other's reactions to my decisions has made me a more compassionate person and very hesitant to judge. The old adage about not judging someone until we have walked a mile in their shoes is very insightful.
Btw, I am glad to see this thread receive some more comments, I find the subject matter interesting.2 -
Lonestar5715 wrote: »BinaryPulsar wrote: »So, I try not to judge harshly without knowing the actual facts
I have finally learned this lesson the hard way. I would add that even once the facts are known it is impossible to understand the impact a particular set of circumstances has on another person or even ourselves until we are in the same situation.
In the past year I have done things that throughout my life I have condemned in others. Seeing other's reactions to my decisions has made me a more compassionate person and very hesitant to judge. The old adage about not judging someone until we have walked a mile in their shoes is very insightful.
Btw, I am glad to see this thread receive some more comments, I find the subject matter interesting.
I definitely agree with you. Thanks for sharing. People have a lot of hurt and pain. They project that onto others and view them as being like what caused them pain. They want people to pay and suffer for their pain. But, what you said is true. Each person is an individual. We don't know their story or struggles or pain either. It sure is a difficult subject though. Because of how many people have been hurt in these situations. But, we shouldn't stand in the way of people facing things with honesty and allowing them to heal and move forward.0 -
"Happily married," the opening post says. I could not have married a better man. Both times. My first husband was fantastic, but I was not. I had no idea how to be a decent wife. I was nothing but frustration to him, but, at least, I gave him two great children. They were what held us together for our short 8.5 years.
After he was killed in a plane accident, I stayed single, knowing that I had huge personal deficits. I threw my life into rearing our children, going to school, and learning how to just be a decent person. After nine years of that, an old friend became widowed, and the race was on. I knew marriage was going to happen, but I knew, too, that I wasn't ready. But a year later, there we were in the woods with a gathering of our friends, marrying, and I was scared to death but doing it. Sure enough, I wasn't ready, but I muddled through it with him, my two children, and his two.
But we made it. The children, all in their forties now, are all great people with great children of their own. G-D can work miracles out of the messes we present, for sure.
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RainaProske wrote: »"Happily married," the opening post says. I could not have married a better man. Both times. My first husband was fantastic, but I was not. I had no idea how to be a decent wife. I was nothing but frustration to him, but, at least, I gave him two great children. They were what held us together for our short 8.5 years.
After he was killed in a plane accident, I stayed single, knowing that I had huge personal deficits. I threw my life into rearing our children, going to school, and learning how to just be a decent person. After nine years of that, an old friend became widowed, and the race was on. I knew marriage was going to happen, but I knew, too, that I wasn't ready. But a year later, there we were in the woods with a gathering of our friends, marrying, and I was scared to death but doing it. Sure enough, I wasn't ready, but I muddled through it with him, my two children, and his two.
But we made it. The children, all in their forties now, are all great people with great children of their own. G-D can work miracles out of the messes we present, for sure.
Wow, that is quite an honest and humble look back on your life. I envy your ability to see your own faults and admit your mistakes. I especially like the fact that you were brave enough to make another attempt at being united to another person in marriage regardless of the risks.
It's nice that there was a happy ending and I concur that often God honors our efforts, as flawed as they may be, and allows us the joy of experiencing the better things in life.3 -
Thank you, Lonestar5715. I think about it often, but I'm grateful for the life He's given us. 1
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BinaryPulsar wrote: »Lonestar5715 wrote: »BinaryPulsar wrote: »So, I try not to judge harshly without knowing the actual facts
It sure is a difficult subject though. Because of how many people have been hurt in these situations. But, we shouldn't stand in the way of people facing things with honesty and allowing them to heal and move forward.
Yes @BinaryPulsar, I am definitely not in favor of marital cheating in light of the damaging effects that ripple out from it but I have been on both sides now and simply acknowledge that my perspective is exactly that, my perspective. The myriad details that are behind the cheating may not be something with which I can identify even if I knew what they were and that is what helps curb my urge to judge others on it.1 -
Not sure if I said this already. Yesterday was our 16th wedding anniversary. Also this is my 8000th post. Lol. Edit: it says 8000 on my forum profile page. But, not if you click to view my forum profile. Just so people don't think I can't count.
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fit4life_78 wrote: »Being a stay at home dad sounds great, but I don't think I could handle it, you women do so much and take care of so many different things at home, I can't even hang for a day or 2, lol
My hubby did it for a while.. He would run out as soon as I came home lmao.. It's not for everyone!
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@BinaryPulsar ! Congratulations to you and your sweetheart on that anniversary! Excellent!
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Happily married with two girls in central Illinois. We just got back from the pool. Life is good.2
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Cutaway_Collar wrote: »Major in laws drama. Pro-black lives matter folks versus pro-cop on Facebook.
Uh oh. Can't we be both. I don't want any of my friends being killed (or strangers).3
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