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Celibacy for a set amount of time

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  • strozmanstrozman Member Posts: 2,629 Member Member Posts: 2,629 Member
    Yeah,After being used for sex I refuse to have sex with any man unless we are in a serious relationship. Before I watched porn several times a day, casual sex. At some point it feels so empty, I'm so much happier when I'm celibate.

    @alltheabove198 it's way easier for a woman to dictate sexual terms in a beginning relationship than it is for a man. I'm glad to hear you are happier celibate
  • strozmanstrozman Member Posts: 2,629 Member Member Posts: 2,629 Member
    You'll have to channel that energy to other activities.

    'Sexual transmutation' is the term used in the spiritual world.

    If you think you'll unlock benefits by simply committing to celibacy, it won't happen. You might find yourself following women around the makeup aisle at Target and that's not cool.

    Gotta dedicate yourself to becoming a better person. Reading, watching educational programs, hiking, walking, dancing, knitting, meditating. Should be a time for self-enrichment.

    Also, removing the sexual stimulation that is so prevalent nowadays will help facilitate the process. That's why monks have an easier time remaining celibate--- they don't do kitten all day but walk around a forest, meditate, and eat. You'll want to withdraw from social media, get your weather from your phone instead of the local busty meteorologist, go to the gym during dead hours (too many pheromones in the air otherwise), and delete all attractive MFP friends. You can re-introduce these things later and it'll be a cakewalk because your mind will now be functioning like the movie Avatar. Frequencies that even NASA couldn't tap into.

    Good luck! Keep a diary!




    Thanks for the info. I'm going to read up on it
  • strozmanstrozman Member Posts: 2,629 Member Member Posts: 2,629 Member
    jgkoutr wrote: »
    I went w/o for two weeks..didn't go well...out of frustration slept w ex

    That's the fear, I turn into a raging monster at 10 days
  • Justpeachy02Justpeachy02 Member Posts: 11,862 Member Member Posts: 11,862 Member
    strozman wrote: »
    Well. Celibacy was kind of forced tonight. Ended up going for lots of drinks and the girl I was with passed out when we got back to her place. Easy 2nd night of celibacy.

    This made me laugh out loud

    What sucks is when celibacy is forced upon you unwillingly :D
  • ChieflrgChieflrg Member Posts: 8,384 Member Member Posts: 8,384 Member
    I did for over a year while going through my divorce.
    I wanted to focus on my kids who resided with me as welll to simplify my life.
    It was a good thing at the time.
  • Justpeachy02Justpeachy02 Member Posts: 11,862 Member Member Posts: 11,862 Member
    Chieflrg wrote: »
    I did for over a year while going through my divorce.
    I wanted to focus on my kids who resided with me as welll to simplify my life.
    It was a good thing at the time.

    Good for you!
    I didn't even know there was a man in the world that would choose to do this
  • AliciaFKAliciaFK Member Posts: 71 Member Member Posts: 71 Member
    When you know you can't have it but you're partner is still there next to you for example your partner is doing it for religious or sport reasons it is so difficult to refrain, it makes you want it even more. However my partner has been out of the country for 2 weeks & I didn't even let myself think about it although I think it wa different for him he kept saying it was the first thing we were doing when he got back
  • strozmanstrozman Member Posts: 2,629 Member Member Posts: 2,629 Member
    Chieflrg wrote: »
    I did for over a year while going through my divorce.
    I wanted to focus on my kids who resided with me as welll to simplify my life.
    It was a good thing at the time.

    I never took time off. Just kind of went on a rampage after my ex and I split. Nice to hear that it simplified your life.
  • strozmanstrozman Member Posts: 2,629 Member Member Posts: 2,629 Member
    AliciaFK wrote: »
    When you know you can't have it but you're partner is still there next to you for example your partner is doing it for religious or sport reasons it is so difficult to refrain, it makes you want it even more. However my partner has been out of the country for 2 weeks & I didn't even let myself think about it although I think it wa different for him he kept saying it was the first thing we were doing when he got back

    I don't have any long term prospects in my life, but I do understand that kind of waiting. I deployed a few times in my lifexperience and was without for long periods of time.
  • strozmanstrozman Member Posts: 2,629 Member Member Posts: 2,629 Member
    strozman wrote: »
    Well. Celibacy was kind of forced tonight. Ended up going for lots of drinks and the girl I was with passed out when we got back to her place. Easy 2nd night of celibacy.

    This made me laugh out loud

    What sucks is when celibacy is forced upon you unwillingly :D
    Just a random hookup that didn't work out, and I didn't push the issue either. Just snuck out without a word this morning
  • strozmanstrozman Member Posts: 2,629 Member Member Posts: 2,629 Member
    Everyone enjoys sex, but it's not going to kill you if you don't have it. I know exactly what you are talking about and I think you should try celibacy for a while. Maybe if you go without it for a while it will become more meaningful for you once you start having it again.
    Just focus your time and thoughts on other things. Don't let sex define who you are or complicate your life. :)
    That's it. It defines me. It complicates my life. But I worry if I take time off at the age of 40 that my opportunities are going to decrease significantly or stop happening altogether.
  • PurringMyrrhPurringMyrrh Member Posts: 5,310 Member Member Posts: 5,310 Member
    Would you still...you know...not go celibate from yourself, or are you including even self...stuff?

    Because if that's still an option, I'm good for a hella long time off.
    edited May 2016
  • strozmanstrozman Member Posts: 2,629 Member Member Posts: 2,629 Member
    kace_kay wrote: »
    I was voluntarily celibate for 2+ years. I was in a *kitten* place in my life and needed to take control. It was hard at first but after a about 6 months, it became easier. I had a high sex drive and it was incredibly difficult to pass up the opportunities that were given. After about a year, it was mostly second nature. It was frustrating to have my control tested... but in the end, it really helped me learn that I have control over my life and the things I do and that I can do anything I set my mind to with the right amount of willpower. I would promote it to you if you think it's something that would help you... but it's certainly not going to be fun.

    Control is what I'm seeking. Although I worry the number of opportunities will fade
  • strozmanstrozman Member Posts: 2,629 Member Member Posts: 2,629 Member
    Would you still...you know...not go celibate from yourself, or are you including even self...stuff?

    Because if that's still an option, I'm good for a hella long time off.

    was thinking all. but I don't know. Anyway I failed twice tonight on the celibacy. Back on the wagon tomorrow
  • shakeirawhitneyshakeirawhitney Member Posts: 74 Member Member Posts: 74 Member
    I have been voluntarily celibate for a year and 2 months. I was in a 7 year relationship and when it ended decided to focus on myself before focusing on anyone else. It was a little rough at first but between work, being a single mom and working out it gets easier. I don't even mind the lack of sex because ultimately it was my decision to become celibate.
  • Dannigreen31Dannigreen31 Member Posts: 570 Member Member Posts: 570 Member
    Me, doing it right now. Been difficult the entire time but I'm staying well away from men atm! Nursing broken heart
  • lilkimi525lilkimi525 Member Posts: 1,107 Member Member Posts: 1,107 Member
    Well ... I would just never give it up... Period. I like it too much. For me.. Not so much the other person... It's awesome exercise not only for my body but my mind as well.... It's a good way to re charge and refocus. It's a great stress reliever.... And a good reason to pig out at 2 o clock in the morning after wards. If you get it early enough in the morning.... It always makes you have a better day.... Ahhhh no.... I can't really find a good reason not to do it. That's just a personal reason for me. But props to all of you going for your goals. Mine just seem to be on the other side of that coin... My glass seems to stay half full... And I like it that way!!!
  • jennifer_417jennifer_417 Member Posts: 12,369 Member Member Posts: 12,369 Member
    Well, I'm a Christian, and not married, so I can assure you that you can live celibate. It's not always fun, but it can be done.
    edited May 2016
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