Do men secretly want a more traditional housewife?

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  • KissMeImShtFaced
    KissMeImShtFaced Posts: 85
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    Excellent question. Now get in the kitchen and make me a sandwich while I think about my answer.
  • jdad1
    jdad1 Posts: 1,899 Member
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    I do want me a sammich. Go and get me a sammich!!!
  • K_Serz
    K_Serz Posts: 1,299 Member
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    So here's my question: in this modern society do men secretly (or sub subconsciously) want a 1950's doting housewife?

    I'm not meaning dressing up like a 50's house wife, but more in spirit : making the man the #1 priority, centring your day around his comings and goings, hot meal on the table, house clean, wife all prettied up...

    If guys do like that is it just a novelty and they get bored with it or is it something deep down they want but dare not say so?

    we want a lady in the street but a freak in the bed -- "Yeah!" Usher (feat. Lil' Jon, Ludacris)
  • EggsEggsEgss
    EggsEggsEgss Posts: 11 Member
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    self-confidence and intelligence makes her more attractive to me - i can't live in a 50th style relationship and my gf definitely has to have a job. both partners should be independant - as far as love allows it ;-)
  • bdeezy3396
    bdeezy3396 Posts: 89 Member
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    I can't speak of it or my man card may be revoked !!!!!!!
  • TexanAngel79
    TexanAngel79 Posts: 54
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    When I first got married to my husband it was more the traditional role! I stayed home and kept the house clean, cooked, and took care of our kids! Then my independence came out, I went to school and started a career!! He would rather me be at home still, but with a 15 and 10 year old, it makes no sense to me!! I think it all depends on the man and also how he was raised!! I still cook daily(I love cooking) and my daughters help with the housework!
  • runner2runner
    runner2runner Posts: 1,937 Member
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    I secretly want a woman who can tell me to go to hell when I ask what's for dinner, lol!! Oh dammit, my secret's out!!
  • 1princesswarrior
    1princesswarrior Posts: 1,242 Member
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    The Good Wives Guide circa 1950!

    Have dinner ready.
    Plan ahead, even the night before, to have a delicious meal ready on time for his return. This is a way of letting him know that you have been thinking about him and are concerned about his needs. Most men are hungry when they come home and the prospect of a good meal (especially his favourite dish) is part of the warm welcome needed.
    Prepare yourself.
    Take 15 minutes to rest so you'll be refreshed when he arrives. Touch up your make-up, put a ribbon in your hair and be fresh looking. He has just been with a lot of work-weary people. His boring day may need a lift and one of your duties is to provide it.
    Clear away clutter.
    Make one last trip through the main part of the house just before your husband arrives. Gather up schoolbooks, toys, papers, etc. and then run a dustcloth over the tables.
    Over the winter months of the year you should prepare and light a fire for him to unwind by. Your husband will feel he has reached a haven of rest and order, and it will give you a lift too. After all, catering for his comfort will provide you with immense personal satisfaction.
    Prepare the children.
    Take a few minutes to wash the children's hands and faces, comb their hair, and if necessary change their clothes. They are little treasures and he would like to see them playing the part.
    Minimise all noise.
    At the time of his arrival, eliminate all noise of the washer, dryer or vacuum. Try to encourage the children to be quiet.
    Be happy to see him.
    Greet him with a warm smile and show sincerity in your desire to please him.
    Listen to him.
    You may have a dozen important things to tell him, but the moment of his arrival is not the right time. Let him talk first - remember, his topics of conversation are more important than yours.
    Make the evening his.
    Never complain if he comes home late or goes out to dinner, or other places of entertainment without you. Instead, try to understand his world of strain and pressure, and his real need to be at home and relax.
    Your goal.
    Try to make sure that your home is a place of peace and tranquility where your husband can renew himself in body and spirit.
    Don't greet him with complaints and problems.
    Don't complain if he's late home for dinner or even if he stays out all night. Count this as minor compared to what he might have gone throught that day.
    Make him comfortable.
    Have him lean back in a comfortable chair or have him lie down in the bedroom. Have a cool or a warm drink ready for him. Arrange his pillow and offer to take off his shoes. Speak in a low, soothing and pleasant voice.
    Don't ask him questions about his actions or question his judgement or integrity. Remember, he is master of the house and as such, will always excercise his will with fairness and truthfulness.
    You have no right to question him.
    A good wife knows her place

    So that's why I'm not married, I never learned all those rules:ohwell:
  • oldandhealthier
    oldandhealthier Posts: 449 Member
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    I grew up in the 50's when women were not even allowed to wear pants let alone work out side the home. This is back before woman were even allowed to have a career. I would never want my wife or my daughter to live like my mothers generation did. I admit it was not easy for my wife and I to change through the decades but I am glad we did, because I remember too well how my father treated my mother. This should not be asked of young men because all they know is the romantic image. I saw how it really was.
  • KristysLosing
    KristysLosing Posts: 683
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    I would like to be a traditional wife...stay at home and take care of the house. BUT...we live nicely because we both work. Me quitting my job would mean sacrafices that we don't necessarily want to make. And the kids are getting into school now, so they have friends and won't be home so much. Although...that is when I enjob being home sometimes! I look forward to school starting...I'm going to take a day off when both kids are in school and enjoy the quiet!!
    ETA - I am still expected to take care of the house...my husband is awful at keeping things clean. And picking up after himself. He is great at complaining about the house not being clean. BUT...as I have reminded him...I work full time! And then I am expected to do everything else too. I would be happy to take care of the house and kids if I didn't have to work full time. It would be much easier. I'm tired when I get home too. OH...and we are working on remodeling a room to be our bedroom and I have been doing that too. I love him, but he has no ambition lately!
  • jamiesillimandunn
    jamiesillimandunn Posts: 270 Member
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    I find myself questioning that in a sense ALOT... I think my family is about as old school as it can get in modern day ...I stay home with most days five children ! I cook three home cooked meals a day and snacks in between , I clean house, dishes, laundry fold ( it usually ends there for the day ) but in between all the wife and house duties I'm a mother of two teens and three toddlers so I'm constantly wiping off sticky prints picking up toys discipline etc etc. HE works 12 hrs a day comes home kisses the kids eats his dinner with three toddlers over him and I sneak out the door to have my fifteen minutes of silence !! Lol, I sit by the pool or take a walk through my garden ! Honestly I think my husband would LOVE for me to be a fifties wife , but these days that's next to impossible, back then they had supportive neighbors and family near by to help even nannies raising the kids ...in today's world a nannie is not in the budget for most single employees families ...so I think you get what you put in :) and I'm still working on getting an allowance from him bahahaa ...he said he has to fit it into the budget ;) hell I would love a fifties life style too , parties clean house , actually get time to do my makeup ( in heard of ) lol
  • thesupremeforce
    thesupremeforce Posts: 1,207 Member
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    No.
    I don't require any of that. I can take care of myself, so I don't need a maid, nanny, or full-time cook. I also don't need constant attention. Women can be as active and successful as they want. That's better for me anyway.
  • LoraF83
    LoraF83 Posts: 15,694 Member
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    So here's my question: in this modern society do men secretly (or sub subconsciously) want a 1950's doting housewife?

    I'm not meaning dressing up like a 50's house wife, but more in spirit : making the man the #1 priority, centring your day around his comings and goings, hot meal on the table, house clean, wife all prettied up...

    If guys do like that is it just a novelty and they get bored with it or is it something deep down they want but dare not say so?

    Men aren't a monolith; they don't all want one thing or another in a woman (Heck, some of them don't want women.)

    So yeah, some do and some don't, just like with anything else.

    This pretty much sums it up.

    Although I'm sure a lot of men - and women - would like a spouse that makes them a priority. Isn't that kind of the point?
  • Toblave
    Toblave Posts: 244 Member
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    We are fairly traditional, and we like it that way. I am the provider for the household and she takes care of the home, though I do much of the cooking and we do some of the shopping together. I am the King and she is my Queen in our home, I make most of the decisions regarding our family but never without her input and ideas.

    My Wife, our children and our home are always my top priority and I am hers.
  • WendyTerry420
    WendyTerry420 Posts: 13,274 Member
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    So here's my question: in this modern society do men secretly (or sub subconsciously) want a 1950's doting housewife?

    I'm not meaning dressing up like a 50's house wife, but more in spirit : making the man the #1 priority, centring your day around his comings and goings, hot meal on the table, house clean, wife all prettied up...

    If guys do like that is it just a novelty and they get bored with it or is it something deep down they want but dare not say so?

    This is a secret? :laugh:
  • CrazyTrackLady
    CrazyTrackLady Posts: 1,337 Member
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    My mom, God bless her, is in her mid 80s. Her advice to me when I was younger: "Get an education and a job before you get married. Get at least one year's work experience under your belt, so you can build a resume. That way, if you ever need to live on your own, you can. Don't rely on a man to take care of you. They're great to have around, but not 100% necessary for your survival."

    Great words from a great lady. I've never understood how some women can stay at home while their husbands work their butts off to keep them in expensive clothing, jewelry, homes and cars.

    We have a friend who was/is a traditional Italian patriarch - wife stayed home with the kids, wasn't allowed to get a drivers license, a job, etc. Dinner was to be on the table 5 minutes before he walked in the door. No diaper changes or kid stuff, EVER from the husband.

    When their son was 2, there was a tragic accident. Wife couldn't drive the baby to the hospital right away, and the squad took too long to get there. Sadly, their toddler passed away before he got to the hospital. I know it's an extreme example, but leaving a woman at home without a way to go out and take care of things is foolish, in my opinion.
  • mfrkorey
    mfrkorey Posts: 176 Member
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    So here's my question: in this modern society do men secretly (or sub subconsciously) want a 1950's doting housewife?

    I'm not meaning dressing up like a 50's house wife, but more in spirit : making the man the #1 priority, centring your day around his comings and goings, hot meal on the table, house clean, wife all prettied up...

    If guys do like that is it just a novelty and they get bored with it or is it something deep down they want but dare not say so?

    I think, in a sense, that it should be like this BUT it should go both ways. A wife should make her partner or family her #1 priority. Be interested in what they are doing and striving to meet their needs. You should keep yourself looking as good as possible. Why give that to strangers and not the people you love? THEN if the other partner is doing that as well, you are giving each other your best and in most cases that should make for a happy strong relationship.
  • TheRoadDog
    TheRoadDog Posts: 11,793 Member
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    What is traditional? If both husband and wife have settled into roles that make them happy, then those are the roles that are best for them.

    My mom was that traditional 50's wife and Mom. In the 50's. As we grew, so did the role my Mom played in our lives. The 50's is just a moment in time. As were the 60's, 70's and so on.

    Back then having a Donna Reed type for a Mom was great, but I don't want Donna Reed for a wife. I want Amy Adams or Sofia Vergara. I found the perfect combination of both.
  • Mischievous_Rascal
    Mischievous_Rascal Posts: 1,791 Member
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    I need a housewife like that, myself! :)
  • Alta2000
    Alta2000 Posts: 655 Member
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    When the children start approaching college life, men start having identity crisis as they do not want to accept they are growing older. Along with the physical problems, may be work problems, a parent dies around that time, they start questioning their entire life and life decisions. The less attuned with their feelings and thoughts they have been, the worse they react. That's when the partner has to be supportive and understanding. It's the reason most divorces happen at middle age. If they are childhood issues that have not been addressed, everything now explodes. 40-55 yrs old is the age that mid life happens.

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