Would you charge your parents rent?

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Replies

  • UnwrappingCandy
    UnwrappingCandy Posts: 418 Member
    If either of my parents were to ask me for any kind of assistance I would say 'you're effing joking, right?.' Then I would laugh and walk away. Well, maybe I would consider helping my mum if my sperm donor were dead, but I'd have to see that his death made her capable of thinking for herself instead of having thoughts and opinions dictated to her.
  • MindyG150
    MindyG150 Posts: 1,296 Member
    My guess is that she helps with the kids more than told, and possibly the cooking etc. If that is the case consider yourself lucky. Either way, she is your Mother and well, she should get to live with you rent-free.
  • Laddiegirl
    Laddiegirl Posts: 382 Member
    No, definitely not. If I'm doing well, the mortgage is paid off, she's recently widowed and on a small fixed income it wouldn't feel right at all. If it were a financial hardship to help her out in this way I would consider it but it seems completely unnecessary in this set of circumstances.
  • Gabrielm80
    Gabrielm80 Posts: 1,458 Member
    Depends. Some people think they must pay or they feel as a guest. I would not require it but moving in with your children is hard enough with out wondering where they stand with in the house. By paying rent it can give the feeling you are participating in the household. Which has the allure to gain some of the once lost power back. If they must pay something or else feel worthless I would figure out what amount works best. That said if my parents or parent had to move in I would not ask, but knowing them would still be given an amount each month to cover some food costs
  • tennileb
    tennileb Posts: 265 Member
    I think if My mom moved in with me I wouldn't charge her rent, but I think I'd ask her to cover the therapist fees that would be getting racked up with us living under the same roof.

    in reality I probably would not ask for rent unless I needed it to make ends meet with another mouth to feed, but I do think there should be some mutual assistance if she was able, i.e. baby-sitting, meal prep? then she could feel like she was a contributing member of the home.
  • No. but I would ask if she could help with babysitting. Just having her around her grand kids is good for them. They need to see older people being and family being cared for in a family setting. Not being shunted off to an old age home.

    Why would you want to steal her money? She supported you for years without pay of any kind. Why take the little money that she has?
  • Gabrielm80
    Gabrielm80 Posts: 1,458 Member
    I do know of a situation that is totally different. Someone I know is married and her mother in law moved in after the father in law died. My friend and spouse are not rich. Both work a lot, my friend two jobs. The mother in law has a lot of money. She just doesn't want to live alone. They are not given anything for rent, and yet the in law had cable upgraded. Which she also doesnt pay for. I hear about everything and think that women should pay, but she isn't on a fixed income. So that situation is completely different.
  • JessicaBR13
    JessicaBR13 Posts: 294 Member
    Depends on if she is a good mom or not. Good mom - no , bad mom- hell yes
  • helpfit101
    helpfit101 Posts: 347 Member
    Am I the only one that has a relationship with his parents where the outcome would be what's best for them AND me ? Basically my parents would give me any money they could spare and I them. And my brother too.

    If you are going to inherit their money anyway and they are your DAD or your MOM and you are their son or daughter ... *boggles* Why does it matter at all? Just do what's beneficial for all of you, together. You're the closest of family! Money is not a taboo it is just a tool that you use for yourself AND your family.
  • neandermagnon
    neandermagnon Posts: 7,436 Member
    no I wouldn't because she's my mum and in this scenario she's only living on a pension. It's likely she'd help out a lot with the kids, and will probably buy some of her own foods and things she wants for herself. If she was working in a high paying job I might but I wouldn't call it rent I'd call it "money to help out with the expenses because you're earning more than me".

    your mum didn't charge you for changing your nappies (diapers) when you were a baby, or all the nights she sat up all night because you were sick or all the trouble you caused her when you were a kid, so why should you charge her for you looking after her in old age?
  • pennelope515
    pennelope515 Posts: 369
    I'm a bad person...I would. :laugh:
  • YaGigi
    YaGigi Posts: 817 Member
    I would NEVER even think about this.

    My parents gave me my life. I owe them everything I have.

    If I charge her rent, she got to charge for years of me living with them, for buying my food, clothes, taking care of me and lovin me every moment.

    I mean that's such a weird question...


    If you have financial problems, I'd understand asking your mom for help. But not charging her every month as its her obligation and you're a landlord. That sounds so sick to me!!!

    Situation (not my own situation):

    You are doing well financially (mortgage paid off, you and your spouse have high paying/stable jobs etc.). You have 4 children that are all under the age of 10. You let your mom live in your finished basement after your dad passes away. Her only income is from the government (pension/benefits) which is around $800-1200 per month.

    Would you charge her RENT?

    IF ...

    Yes - Then how much would you charge her ?

    No - Tell us why, is it wrong ?


    BE HONEST ....





    tnxs.
  • jenilla1
    jenilla1 Posts: 11,118 Member
    Since you say you are doing well financially, you don't need the money. Was she a good mother to you? Is she a nice person and respectful of you as an adult? If so, I wouldn't charge her rent. I don't see the point in it unless her presence in your household is going to be an economic burden. Just let her help out in other ways if she's looking for a way to contribute.

    It's not just about duty or obligation to family either. My husband and I have relatives that we would host for free and we have relatives who would not be welcome no matter how much money they could pay. It's a matter of relationships. If you've got a good relationship, and this person is a positive force in your life, do what you can to help. If the person is a low-down, dirty creep, someone who has brought you misery and pain, then don't let them darken your doorstep.

    If you love your mom and she has been loving to you and your family, don't charge her rent. :flowerforyou:
  • MzzFaith
    MzzFaith Posts: 337 Member
    No
  • gettinfitaus
    gettinfitaus Posts: 161 Member
    No way.

    BUT I would take full advantage of the built-in baby-sitting availability.

    This!
  • onwarddownward
    onwarddownward Posts: 1,683 Member
    My mom and dad are both dead. I gladly pay my mom to live here if it would get her back. Twenty years this past July seventh.
  • zinatara
    zinatara Posts: 76 Member
    No, I don't think I would.

    But I can see a reason to take rent money from the parents, at least here in Norway. When your parents die and you're going to inherit them you will have to pay taxes. But while your parents are alive they can give you some money tax free every year in advance. And if you rent out parts of the house you live in, you will not have to pay tax on this income either. So if you're an only child who will be the sole inheriter or maybe your parents want to repay you for your care during theire last years, this can be a good way to do it.
  • VeganLexi
    VeganLexi Posts: 960 Member
    Definitely not, I'm assuming the parent didn't charge rent to the kid while he/she was residing in the family home...
  • ktsmom430
    ktsmom430 Posts: 1,100 Member
    No. I would definately not charge rent.
    We never charged our child rent when she moved home for a couple of years after college.
    But if it were me, and I was living in my child's home, I would help out with shopping, cleaning, cooking, child care and in any other way that I could.
  • El_Cunado
    El_Cunado Posts: 359 Member
    Hell No!!

    Cause they're my parents.
  • 122ish
    122ish Posts: 339 Member
    What nooooooo if u and wifey had money issues and supporting another adult was difficult then yeah mom should kick down with some help for food and bills but in your situation just sounds greedy. I hope u were speaking hypothetically or for a friend and not so insensitive that u would charge mommy rent on her low income after losing daddy.
  • JeremiahStone
    JeremiahStone Posts: 682 Member
    NEVER
  • NeverTooLateForChange
    NeverTooLateForChange Posts: 131 Member
    I would NEVER charge parents or parents-in-law rent. If ever it becomes a financial hardship to you then you can ask siblings or other family members to contribute funds to supplement the cost of her care but Never ask her for the money. If she insists on contributing, set the money aside in a money market account and use it to send her on vacation or treat her to something awesome like a mother-son cruise or cross country road trip.
  • MyJourney1960
    MyJourney1960 Posts: 1,133 Member
    it really really depends.

    I don't buy the argument "no, after all my parents did for me, i wouldn't charge them rent".

    In my culture (and i understand that there are cultural differences), that is what parents DO. you are a parent- then you sleep little for the first few years of your child's life, you change millions of diapers,you support/feed/cloth/house/love/support your children, you play thousands of silly games and read the same books 4 billion times. that's is what your job is and you don't get paid for it.

    It's not a given that it is my job to then support MY parents. it's not a payback/"i owe you".

    Yes my parents raised me and clothed me and put a roof over my head. However, my parents also made extremely stupid and bad financial choices that have affected my siblings and myself. since *I* don't want to be a burden on *my* child, I would have to think if i would allow my paernt to live with me rent-free. And at the same time, if you are planning to use the parent as a built-in baby sitter, that tacks on other aspects...

    To be honest - I don't know if i would even want my parent to live with me. If i was able to help them out financially i might prefer tohelp them pay their rent and not have them live with me. but if i was in the situation described in the OP (which I am not), I don't know if i would specifically charge rent - but I might charge for the utilities and/or food.
  • glovepuppet
    glovepuppet Posts: 1,710 Member
    i say, yes. a small enough amount that she can still live comfortably but a large enough amount that she still feels like 1) she has her dignity and isn't a charity case, 2) that she feels like her rooms are her own and that she's not just a guest, 3) that she never feels the guilt of feeling like a drain on her family or that she owes them something.

    moot point really. no way in hell would i ever live with my crazyarse mother.
  • luvmydog2
    luvmydog2 Posts: 243 Member
    If I was well off financially, and my mom only took in that small amount of money, I would never charge her rent. It sounds like a situation that might be emotionally humbling for her too, a step down from being in her own home. I would want her to feel welcome. She could pay for he own food and other personal items.

    The only time I would charge rent would be if I was strapped financially. Then I would appreciate something from her. But that isn't the situation you are describing.

    Mothers give up everything for their kids over many years. This is an opportunity to give something back to her.

    Totally agree.. well said ....
  • Chadomaniac
    Chadomaniac Posts: 1,785 Member
    NO
  • Newnameishardtofind
    Newnameishardtofind Posts: 867 Member
    Nooooo
  • luvmydog2
    luvmydog2 Posts: 243 Member
    No way.

    BUT I would take full advantage of the built-in baby-sitting availability.

    This!
    Now that i don't agree with ... love my 9 grandchildren ... but there is a life after bringing up your own children .. Why at our age are we expected to do it all over again .
    Personally I could not live with my children ... in our senior years we need our own space . :wink:
    Please don't take my comment personally , just my thoughts on the topic .:flowerforyou:
  • MarianneC93
    MarianneC93 Posts: 60 Member
    No because it sounds like she's going through a tough time and she brought you up for years so perhaps you owe her? BUT I would get her to babysit 1 night a week :) Payment sorted :D