Serial Starters

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  • explodingmango
    explodingmango Posts: 171 Member
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    Well guys, you're never gonna guess what happened: my alarm didn't go off and I missed my race. I checked that alarm a dozen times to make sure it was set and going to get me up. It still didn't go off.

    I...am not doing great today. Everything from the last two days is still getting to me...and now this.

    I want to be mad at my (probably ex) friend but the only thing that's his fault is him ditching me over this. He didn't say anything that wasn't a true fact - that he's had those thoughts, and that the vast majority of people don't like costume models who look like me, both of these things are objectively true - and that's what's hurting the most. And...now I know things aren't going to change. I've tried so hard to make them and I still miss my chances.

    Thinking positive...doesn't really help. I was thinking so positively before this happened...it doesn't make those facts that are hurting me so much any less true. It can make it hurt less when I'm not thinking about it, but that just makes it that much harder when I remember.

    I mean, if I ever needed a sign that it's just time to lay down and die, I'm pretty sure this is it. Boyfriend made me promise to stay alive at least until his birthday, though, and I'm frustrated and tired enough that I'm almost angry at him for it.

    Sorry for being such a downer. I just...can't do this whole life thing today.
  • PamRoman61
    PamRoman61 Posts: 20 Member
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    tomorrows another day :)
  • LanaCabana537
    LanaCabana537 Posts: 3,847 Member
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    "Don't let the sound of your own wheels make you crazy"
    --Jackson Browne & Glenn Frey

    Have a good evening everyone

    Lana
  • Tilliesmommy1
    Tilliesmommy1 Posts: 5,332 Member
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    Good evening,

    Found I have sat too long in chair at computer, get side stitches sometimes. Time to walk dog so 2 birds one stone.

    Need a plan for dinners this week..... brain not helping.

    Lana - great lyrics - what talent those two.

    Aroma therapy tonight as I drift to sleep. Wishing all a good night.
  • explodingmango
    explodingmango Posts: 171 Member
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    Thanks to both of you. I...actually found another event I can try for tomorrow. They have on-site registration, and it's in a place I know and like and it's for a cancer charity so the only reason I should even consider not doing it is if I have another alarm clock incident or if I don't find my wallet by morning. If it works out it'll actually be an even better choice for my first event like this. If it doesn't...I don't know what I'm going to do.

    I'm still not feeling too great...it might take me a very long time to get out of this if I can at all. Basically everything I'm terrified of is all coming together at once and the fact that even my own friends are, however unintentionally, basically telling me that it's always going to be this way...it's a lot to handle. It...might be a very long time before I'm really feeling okay.

    Thanks to everyone for being so supportive though. I'll...work things out eventually.
  • Tilliesmommy1
    Tilliesmommy1 Posts: 5,332 Member
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    SUNDAY

    Good morning,

    Dog up and fed. Back to with any luck snooze for me.

    No clue for dinners and hope to be inspired at grocery store -

    Hoping for a quiet day. BBL.
  • LanaCabana537
    LanaCabana537 Posts: 3,847 Member
    edited October 2017
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    Sunday!

    I looked at the weather map - what a mess coming. Sun is out now, though. Time to get going and get out for a walk.
    There is something wrong with the pool heat pump, so I cannot count on using the pool for exercise, which is quite a letdown. No money to have it looked at or fixed now. *sob*

    Into the shower with me!

    Have a good Sunday everyone.

    Mango - Have a good run! Be kind to yourself. Always be kind to yourself. That is not negotiable! Practice, practice, practice!

    Lana

    244.8 today
    250.0 highest
    185.0 goal

  • arniedog74
    arniedog74 Posts: 2,086 Member
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    Mango - hope that alarm went off! Let us know how the run goes!
  • explodingmango
    explodingmango Posts: 171 Member
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    Sunday:

    Made it to the run I found yesterday! Still far from feeling 100% (I still can't face the photo booth, for one thing), but things ARE looking up. I thought for sure something was going to happen again but nope - traffic was almost nonexistent, my car behaved, I made it out the door on time, I had money for registration, I found the starting area easily...I'm here.

    I've gotta cut this update short because warm-up is about to start but I just had to come report good news for the first time in a while.
  • Tilliesmommy1
    Tilliesmommy1 Posts: 5,332 Member
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    Apple/pear sauce cooking on stove, sweet potatoes in oven. Will make rice later for fried rice.

    No granola in yogurt this week - will take the sugar gram hit- stops the after dinner granola snacking, trying to see where I can lose a little calories.....

    Lana - can you do any of the pool exercises on dry land?

    Mango!! Good for you -getting up at some icky hour on the weekend and making the run!! Let us know how it goes.

    NSV- Halloween candy used to get it, never have trick or treaters - walked by looked at all the stuff and just shook my head.

    BBL.
  • explodingmango
    explodingmango Posts: 171 Member
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    Update: finished, didn't quite make my stretch goal time but considering I've been too basically dead to really do my training the way I planned to I think I came close enough.

    What really surprised me, though, was my place in the standings.

    When I first checked my time I was kinda disappointed. I was last in my gender/age group and nearly last overall. So, I was trying not to panic about everything my mother said, trying to just go "well, I finished, and that's better than anyone said I'd ever do" - and then I caught a glimpse of the screens next to me where everyone else was checking their times and I realized everyone who was looking was in a similar position.

    And then I realized that the overall number of participants was...surprisingly low.

    And then I realized it was still going up.

    Because, duh, they were only counting people who had finished so far.

    So with that bit of perspective I looked again and it registered that I had just finished in the top 10 men in my age group.

    So...I'm feeling a fair bit better after that. Not quite 100%, but...not exactly as thoroughly hopeless as the past couple days.
  • LanaCabana537
    LanaCabana537 Posts: 3,847 Member
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    Mango - Very cool! Good for you!

    Lana
  • LanaCabana537
    LanaCabana537 Posts: 3,847 Member
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    Sara - Congrats on passing by that candy!

    I do have exercises from my physical therapy that I can do, and coupled with walking will be my exercise for the winter.

    I love the pool because I can do things for a long time that do not hurt my joints and feet. The buoyancy is key for me --I use floaty things and water weights-- now that the anti-cancer med/estrogen loss is trashing my joints. Gah.

    What's for lunch? A salad with hard-boiled eggs and Bolthouse cilantro lime dressing. I found this favorite dressing at a new little Target they shoe-horned into a small retail space in downtown Chapel Hill! It's been there since May, but I just found it on my walk this morning. Hurray!

    Waves to Dawn and anyone else who stops by later on~~

    Lana
  • tlsb2016
    tlsb2016 Posts: 307 Member
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    Mango, good for you! You finished and in the top 10. Plus, you picked yourself up after a crappy week, disappointment over missing yesterday’s race and STILL did all of this anyway! That’s the definition of bravery. You are inspiring me.

    Cheers to you,
    Tess
  • Tilliesmommy1
    Tilliesmommy1 Posts: 5,332 Member
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    Good evening,

    Apple/pear sauce in freezer will be next to leftover vegetable fried rice.

    Tess - when does the DS drop in?

    Dog needs a walk.

    *snapping fingers to cboys - foot massages please.

    Wishing all a good night.
  • LanaCabana537
    LanaCabana537 Posts: 3,847 Member
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    Hey there Tess!

    My sister and I are having a get-together in Washington DC in two weeks. She is flying east for just under a week. We are planning on museums and very general sight-seeing. She has been there many times, but not I've only been there in a rush.

    I've been there on work-related missions to the Kennedy Center, and I've been to the Smithsonian, but never yet to the National Gallery.

    We're planning a day trip up to Baltimore (waving to Dani!) to the Baltimore Museum of Art because she's never seen the Cone Sisters Collection there--just wonderful.

    Lana
  • Tilliesmommy1
    Tilliesmommy1 Posts: 5,332 Member
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    MONDAY

    Good morning down 1.4 today - weight loss makes no sense, just happy it is going down again.

    Lana - DC with your sister? Lots to see.

    Smelled smoke this morning- chimneys it is getting cold enough. Love my pine scent and aromatherapy I wear to go to sleep- it is Fall finally here.

    I just may have to put war paint on today. Hmmmm how lazy am I? Maybe just the lipstick.

    Wave to all who follow.
  • rsamuelsgold
    rsamuelsgold Posts: 391 Member
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    Waves to all will check in later
  • tawhite00
    tawhite00 Posts: 5 Member
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    Good morning. I’ve used this app several times never got into communities. I’m thinking this will help with keeping me on track. My daughter is getting married in February and don’t want to be the mom that’s out of shape. So I’m hoping this group will keep me on point
  • hickchic67
    hickchic67 Posts: 802 Member
    edited October 2017
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    My brother passed away yesterday. It was peaceful. He was at home and had his wife and children with him.

    My eldest sister and I had seen him Friday. You could just tell time was very short. My SIL asked that I not bring my sister back up until Sunday. We ran into several delays on Sunday and were running behind schedule. SIL called before we were to leave and said he was gone. She asked that I not bring my sister up, said if it were just me that would be welcomed but since my sister would come as well, she just could not handle her that day. I totally understood. I am sure I was rather passive-aggressive to my sister because it hurt not being able to be with the rest of the family during this time.

    I had to make sure my sister did not post anything on FB before my SIL could let everyone know. I also had to monitor who she called and texted for same reason. When she saw my SIL post about his passing, she immediately posted one as well. Spent the rest of the evening counting how many people had commented and/or responded to her post as well as comparing it to SIL post. When the count went well over 500 comments for my SIL's post, my sister actually asked me He didn't really know all those people, did he? I told her to remember he had been a government employee, a substitute teacher, a college professor, an election campaign manager, coached & helped in innumerable basketball conferences & camps, and was very active in his church & community so he had touched many, many lives. He made an impression on each and every person he met. Everyone loved him and he was a role model to many. He was a good man.

    The funeral is Saturday and I know I will have to serve as my sister's "handler" while there as well.

    I came into work today to get some silence and alone time. No one is here because of Columbus Day.

    I have not been tracking. I have been cooking comfort foods. I have been doing a lot of stress eating. I refuse to get on a scale right now. I hope to get back "on the wagon" once my sister has flown home.

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