Who pays?

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  • AnabolicMind2011
    AnabolicMind2011 Posts: 211 Member
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    Alienique wrote: »
    The way I see it is:
    If you initiated, you pay.
    But, if you're a girl and you initiated, you should EXPECT to pay (i.e., be prepared, offer, and don't be offended if you end up paying), but ALLOW the guy to do so if he's persistent about it. To me, there's something rude and unseemly about women who'll fight to the death over being able to pay their own bill - if the guy really wants to pay, let him pay...but still be a gentlewoman and at least take your wallet out. And if he's the type of *kitten* who forms "expectations" after paying for a $40 dinner and a $10 movie (seriously, most hookers would probably charge him more than that), then that's his problem.

    This is what i would do then
    Offer. If he says no, then let them him. But at least offer to pay if it makes you feel more comfortable.
  • Angela937
    Angela937 Posts: 514 Member
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    So I shouldn't expect a guy to pay just cause he's the guy?
  • JessicaJS23
    JessicaJS23 Posts: 1,863 Member
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    Lmao!!!
  • Angela937
    Angela937 Posts: 514 Member
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    GnothiSeauton23 wrote: »
    Angela937 wrote: »
    So I shouldn't expect a guy to pay just cause he's the guy?

    Nope...know your worth and expect more

    Otherwise that's how you end up throwing up in a guys lap

    I think I need to go out with you!
  • arleban
    arleban Posts: 369 Member
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    Angela937 wrote: »
    So I shouldn't expect a guy to pay just cause he's the guy?

    Nope. You should expect him to pay because you were choosy enough to go out with a decent person. You can of course offer if you wish to go half, but he should cover his share at least.
  • JessicaJS23
    JessicaJS23 Posts: 1,863 Member
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    Agreed^^^
  • AnabolicMind2011
    AnabolicMind2011 Posts: 211 Member
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    Just curious- you mentioned you had a bit of a disaster on a date recently and he also made you pay the bill. Now your preparing for another date with someone else. Is there any chance that you are just dating any man that shows interest in you? If so, I would set your standard higher and not go out with everyone and anyone that finds you attractive on a dating site. Maybe hold off all together until you find someone you really click with. Then you won't have to worry about who pays because you'll be comfortable enough with the man to just ask him who is paying. I may have you pegged wrong but just in case I'm correct- set your standards higher. Realize you are worth more then what your getting.
  • JessicaJS23
    JessicaJS23 Posts: 1,863 Member
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    She's using tinder. Don't judge
  • Karb_Kween
    Karb_Kween Posts: 2,681 Member
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    The guy

    If he initiated
  • Angela937
    Angela937 Posts: 514 Member
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    AnabolicMind2011 wrote: »
    Just curious- you mentioned you had a bit of a disaster on a date recently and he also made you pay the bill. Now your preparing for another date with someone else. Is there any chance that you are just dating any man that shows interest in you? If so, I would set your standard higher and not go out with everyone and anyone that finds you attractive on a dating site. Maybe hold off all together until you find someone you really click with. Then you won't have to worry about who pays because you'll be comfortable enough with the man to just ask him who is paying. I may have you pegged wrong but just in case I'm correct- set your standards higher. Realize you are worth more then what your getting.

    I don't have any dates planned, or anyone in mind right now. Just wondering what everyone's opinions are, what the new social norms and rules are.
  • jenmar222
    jenmar222 Posts: 9,279 Member
    edited August 2016
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    I always have the money on me obviously. But the first time we hang, if a guy wants it to be a date, I expect him to pay. If I pay for half...I'm not considering it a date :joy:

    The only exceptions are: 1. If it's a double activity like dinner and a movie; he can pay for dinner and I'll pay for the movie. Or if it's just the movie; he can get the tickets and I'll buy concessions 2. If I know he's struggling financially, I'll pay

    That being said, I also don't spring for the most expensive thing on the menu because I know someone else is paying (I have friends who will do that :confused:). I order what I would want to pay for.

    If I like him, I pay for the second date.
  • Damien_K
    Damien_K Posts: 783 Member
    edited August 2016
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    Angela937 wrote: »
    I'm not going out with that guy again. I couldn't sit there and look at his lap without thinking "I puked there. Did he wash it?"

    y3if77.jpg
  • jenmar222
    jenmar222 Posts: 9,279 Member
    edited August 2016
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    Angela937 wrote: »
    I'm not going out with that guy again. I couldn't sit there and look at his lap without thinking "I puked there. Did he wash it?"

    :joy::joy::joy::joy::joy::joy::joy::joy::joy::joy::joy::joy:

    This will never stop being funny to me. When I'm 60, I'm going to remember that story/this response and laugh.

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