Don't deprive yourself or you'll never last the distance!
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kommodevaran wrote: »It was also easy to "give up" things like regular overeating (I didn't enjoy being uncomfortably stuffed, it was just a bad habit that started in childhood), compulsive eating, mindless eating, worry, defeat, feeling of never getting enough. Instead I got heightened enjoyment of food, and joy of home cooking, even shopping has become fun.
One of the decisions I made when I started with MFP was that I wasn't going to waste my calories on foods I didn't like and that was liberating! Prior to starting with MFP, I ate meat pies and sausages because my husband liked meat pies and sausages, but I wasn't all that keen. I don't mind the occasional meat pie, but we were having them a couple times a week. And I've never been fond of sausages. So I told him he could have all the meat pies and sausages he wanted, but I was eating something I liked that fit within my calorie limit. Now 98% of the food I eat is food I really like ... instead of eating stuff to make other people happy.
Another decision I made was to slow down with my eating and really enjoy what I was eating rather than just stuffing it in.
When I started with MFP, I also went back to university one class per semester to slowly work toward my Master's degree. The second class, in particular, was hugely stressful. A very difficult class. I was working full time + trying to do this class + trying to get some semblance of exercise in occasionally and was really struggling. But my diet was going brilliantly because I didn't have to worry about it. I knew what I could eat and when, and knew that what I was eating was enough to sustain me, and that part of my life went onto autopilot. It was nice to have one part of my life that was just easy.
Also, for me, the math of CI<CO was appealing. I like numbers and math and data. My "area" (where I work and what I'm taking at uni) is in databases. CI<CO has always made sense to me ... even all the way back 30 years ago when I first started using CI<CO to drop a few lbs now and then. I like that I can eat a certain amount and exercise a certain amount and lose weight. And I don't have to feel like I'm missing out.
Which leads me to this ... I'm perimenopausal, and have had just about every issue with perimenopause that a woman could have. I've been in surgery to have a large polyp removed which showed evidence of the early stages of cancer. I've been for repeated, rather invasive testing as they monitored suspicious cysts they thought might be cancerous. I've just now been told I've got fibroids ... and something else they want to check for cancer (I need to book an appointment next week, I think). I've had the emotional issues, hot flashes, night sweats, constant cramping, an allergy to my own hormones, acne, itchiness all over, difficulties with sleeping ... you name it. And I cannot take hormone replacement therapy at all. I just have to ride it out or find other solutions. It seems like every couple months there's something new and weird going on.
BUT ... the one thing I've had control over is my weight. Using the math of CI<CO, I've been able to drop back to my high school weight. And there's really something empowering to have that one bit of control in my life.
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If someone is used to eating 1/2 of a pizza and later cuts down for purposes of weight management to 1 or 2 pieces, then that person feels "deprived". But if one normally only has pizza on occasion and is used to eating a slice or two, then their perception will be one of plenty and gratitude.
I do think that deprivation is a mindset sort of like poverty. But with plentiful food intake our fat is carried on our bodies instead of a bank account.4 -
Need2Exerc1se wrote: »
I feel like I'm in a "I'm not on a diet" thread. I'm not on a diet I'm just eating less to lose weight. Okay then. ::laugh::
Lol. Yes.
I agree with OP in the sense that you don't really have to give up any specific food, which is pretty much the opposite of what people always assume (carbs are bad and whatnot).
But yep, definitely have to deprive myself somewhere or I would gain the weight back. I've been maintaining for 2.5 years and although I haven't banned any food, I still have to eat some of them in VERY limited quantities or just plain pass on them because it's hard to fit in a 1200 calorie piece of cheesecake (cries). If I don't deprive myself, I gain... but I love desserts the most and they're probably the worst bang for your buck when it comes to nutrition.4 -
A big part of starting a healthy lifestyle is to go slow. If you go from sitting on the couch eating pizza and drinking soda to intense workouts and eating nothing but salad it won't work. Watch the calories and macros and don't deprive yourself because food meets both nutritional and emotional needs when you deprive yourself of too much it can cause long term negative effects and ruin a helthy lifestyle. If you take your eye off the ball you are probably eating foods you have deprived yourself of and are compensating by over indulging in them. Everything in moderation that is how you embed a healthy lifestyle. Don't feel quily when you do over indulge or the scale doesn't say what you want because when you get upset the body releases stress chemicals that hender weight loss.You can have cake just not the whole cake. Good luck.depresseddancer wrote: »I've just posted this as my woe and asked for help! How do you embed healthy as a lifestyle choice? The
second I take my eye off the ball I pile back on my problem half a stone.
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CorneliusPhoton wrote: »It would be nice if we'd just automatically feel full at the exact moment our caloric needs have been met.
Yea, I want to eat that 1/2 of a pizza, but I certainly don't need to.
Research brompocriptine over on the Lyle McDonald forums.0 -
That moment when self control and deliberate eating amounts to deprivation.
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I recently hit a weightloss goal of 45 lbs, and it changed my calories from 1700 to 1400 so now im feeling the hunger pains i did like in my first week of dieting, i know its not the same thing. and im still eating stuff i like. i will NEVER do just salads and green tea. i would be bored and break the 2nd week, i didnt make it this far on salad and green tea....LOL4
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Carlos_421 wrote: »That moment when self control and deliberate eating amounts to deprivation.
so in now...esp because of this post.0 -
I recently hit a weightloss goal of 45 lbs, and it changed my calories from 1700 to 1400 so now im feeling the hunger pains i did like in my first week of dieting, i know its not the same thing. and im still eating stuff i like. i will NEVER do just salads and green tea. i would be bored and break the 2nd week, i didnt make it this far on salad and green tea....LOL
How much weight do you still have to lose? If you've lost that much weight (and congrats by the way!) it may be time to change your rate of loss goal, if you have less than 25 lbs to lose a goal of 0.5 lb/week would be appropriate, which should get you some additional calories.1 -
Carlos_421 wrote: »That moment when self control and deliberate eating amounts to deprivation.
Why no Oreo in that picture?
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Carlos_421 wrote: »That moment when self control and deliberate eating amounts to deprivation.
so in now...esp because of this post.
Aside from the fact he couldn't find one that had an Oreo in it, that meme is fitting since I think the point is about perspective and whether you are a glass half full or glass half empty person..2 -
Carlos_421 wrote: »That moment when self control and deliberate eating amounts to deprivation.
so in now...esp because of this post.
I know right? Cutting out cookies, soda pop, and pizza is now "deprivation". Lolz. 'Merica!
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WinoGelato wrote: »I recently hit a weightloss goal of 45 lbs, and it changed my calories from 1700 to 1400 so now im feeling the hunger pains i did like in my first week of dieting, i know its not the same thing. and im still eating stuff i like. i will NEVER do just salads and green tea. i would be bored and break the 2nd week, i didnt make it this far on salad and green tea....LOL
How much weight do you still have to lose? If you've lost that much weight (and congrats by the way!) it may be time to change your rate of loss goal, if you have less than 25 lbs to lose a goal of 0.5 lb/week would be appropriate, which should get you some additional calories.
I have 71 more lbs to go. I was 303 lbs before, and now i am at 255.4 - ive been plateauing for a month, so im switching stuff up a bit in hopes to break it 1 -
Obviously they're not something anyone can't leave without, but we're talking about finding something sustainable for everyone... I might not NEED cookies but if I lived somewhere where you can't have them, you bet that I'd end up missing them. So yeah, for me not eating them would probably lead to deprivation (and that's when I'd end up binging).tlflag1620 wrote: »Carlos_421 wrote: »That moment when self control and deliberate eating amounts to deprivation.
so in now...esp because of this post.
I know right? Cutting out cookies, soda pop, and pizza is now "deprivation". Lolz. 'Merica!
Couldn't care less about soda though and I'm now extremely picky about my pizza.2 -
kommodevaran wrote: »It was also easy to "give up" things like regular overeating (I didn't enjoy being uncomfortably stuffed, it was just a bad habit that started in childhood), compulsive eating, mindless eating, worry, defeat, feeling of never getting enough. Instead I got heightened enjoyment of food, and joy of home cooking, even shopping has become fun.
One of the decisions I made when I started with MFP was that I wasn't going to waste my calories on foods I didn't like and that was liberating! Prior to starting with MFP, I ate meat pies and sausages because my husband liked meat pies and sausages, but I wasn't all that keen. I don't mind the occasional meat pie, but we were having them a couple times a week. And I've never been fond of sausages. So I told him he could have all the meat pies and sausages he wanted, but I was eating something I liked that fit within my calorie limit. Now 98% of the food I eat is food I really like ... instead of eating stuff to make other people happy.
Another decision I made was to slow down with my eating and really enjoy what I was eating rather than just stuffing it in.
I liked the overall post, but these really resonated with me, and are similar to how I approached it, and why I felt like I was eating better when doing a deficit as opposed to depriving myself.1 -
tlflag1620 wrote: »My take on it - for most people, simple calorie counting, without necessarily changing what they eat, just how much, will work just fine.
Agreed, but I also think there's a misunderstanding that "deprivation is not necessary" or "calories are what matters" mean "don't change your diet AT ALL" (other than portions, of course). I don't see it that way. I don't think that people who eat without attention to calories and often quite mindlessly are always (or even usually) eating exactly as they think is the most satisfying and delicious way to eat. So attention to calories often (IMO, usually) will lead to a change in how one eats (and even an improvement of the diet from a nutrition perspective). But the point is that this change doesn't have to feel like deprivation and can even, as Machka9 and others have noted, result in enjoying your diet even more. There's this notion that dieting requires being hungry or eating boring or "diet" foods or never eating something for just enjoyment again, or stereotypical meals of green salad and rice cake (that often aren't even balanced or all that healthful, overall) -- the horrible "Military Diet" is one such example, or the cabbage soup diet or the assumption one must not eat carbs (I get that works for some, but is not necessary for all) or must go vegan/do "raw 'til 4" or (ugh) juice or on and on. That's what I see OP saying isn't needed -- dieting can involve eating a diet one enjoys and would choose voluntarily and which no one watching would necessarily assume is a "diet" diet at all. One thing I loved when losing was that no one knew I was trying to.I lost 50lbs by "depriving" myself, and have happily kept it off for three years.
If you see it that way, that's cool, and I'm glad it works for you. It seems to me, though, that most doing LCHF (or other LC variants) choose it because it is a way they enjoy eating (lots and lots of talk about how they can eat all these foods that were typically assumed to be barred on a diet) and make a point of eating normal, enjoyable meals they would happily eat when not trying to lose. I often think that whether LCHF appeals has to do with just what kind of diet one finds enjoyable. Just as I would do well from a satiety standpoint on low fat, but don't do it, since that would feel like deprivation to me (although I could make it work if I needed to). But others love low fat or prefer no meat (even without ethical issues) or things like that. Finding a diet that fits with weight loss goals and is enjoyable may indeed require changing it up some (I suspect many of us change our diet over the course of our lives, after all -- my preferences are different now than when I was 21), but the point is that that does not mean that one must feel deprived, that a "diet" diet is sad and unappealing compared to the alternatives. If one has strong preferences in how one eats, one can usually build around that (of course there are limits, I suppose, although this was quite easy for me).3 -
Obviously they're not something anyone can't leave without, but we're talking about finding something sustainable for everyone... I might not NEED cookies but if I lived somewhere where you can't have them, you bet that I'd end up missing them. So yeah, for me not eating them would probably lead to deprivation (and that's when I'd end up binging).tlflag1620 wrote: »Carlos_421 wrote: »That moment when self control and deliberate eating amounts to deprivation.
so in now...esp because of this post.
I know right? Cutting out cookies, soda pop, and pizza is now "deprivation". Lolz. 'Merica!
Couldn't care less about soda though and I'm now extremely picky about my pizza.
Deprivation is in the eye of the beholder. I tend to think Carlos is right in his assessment - self control and deliberate eating (whether that comes in the form of eliminating certain foods or just limiting calories overall) is not really "deprivation" in the truest sense (you aren't being deprived of anything necessary for life). Now, *feeling* deprived is totally subjective. You would feel deprived if you went long enough without cookies, so much so you would end up binging, but working some in, even if it is a small portion, and even if it crowds out other more filling foods, keeps you from feeling deprived. I'm just the opposite - I would feel deprived with the one or two cookies I might be able to work in, especially when they edge out other more satiating foods and leave me hungry, but if I don't have them at all, I'm perfectly fine and don't miss them. Different strokes.
But his point still stands - calling going without excess "deprivation" is silly. Going without excess is just normal. The excess is what causes the need for "deprivation" in the first place. If we would have just ate what we needed, and no more, all along, there would be no need to "deprive".
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Carlos_421 wrote: »That moment when self control and deliberate eating amounts to deprivation.
Yep! Like when someone complains they are 'starving' because they haven't eaten for a few hours. Gimme a break.
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tlflag1620 wrote: »
Obviously they're not something anyone can't leave without, but we're talking about finding something sustainable for everyone... I might not NEED cookies but if I lived somewhere where you can't have them, you bet that I'd end up missing them. So yeah, for me not eating them would probably lead to deprivation (and that's when I'd end up binging).tlflag1620 wrote: »Carlos_421 wrote: »That moment when self control and deliberate eating amounts to deprivation.
so in now...esp because of this post.
I know right? Cutting out cookies, soda pop, and pizza is now "deprivation". Lolz. 'Merica!
Couldn't care less about soda though and I'm now extremely picky about my pizza.
Deprivation is in the eye of the beholder. I tend to think Carlos is right in his assessment - self control and deliberate eating (whether that comes in the form of eliminating certain foods or just limiting calories overall) is not really "deprivation" in the truest sense (you aren't being deprived of anything necessary for life). Now, *feeling* deprived is totally subjective. You would feel deprived if you went long enough without cookies, so much so you would end up binging, but working some in, even if it is a small portion, and even if it crowds out other more filling foods, keeps you from feeling deprived. I'm just the opposite - I would feel deprived with the one or two cookies I might be able to work in, especially when they edge out other more satiating foods and leave me hungry, but if I don't have them at all, I'm perfectly fine and don't miss them. Different strokes.
But his point still stands - calling going without excess "deprivation" is silly. Going without excess is just normal. The excess is what causes the need for "deprivation" in the first place. If we would have just ate what we needed, and no more, all along, there would be no need to "deprive".
Going without excess isn't what's needed for fat loss. We must go without enough to maintain before fat stores will be used. We must deprive our bodies of food fuel.2 -
Need2Exerc1se wrote: »tlflag1620 wrote: »
Obviously they're not something anyone can't leave without, but we're talking about finding something sustainable for everyone... I might not NEED cookies but if I lived somewhere where you can't have them, you bet that I'd end up missing them. So yeah, for me not eating them would probably lead to deprivation (and that's when I'd end up binging).tlflag1620 wrote: »Carlos_421 wrote: »That moment when self control and deliberate eating amounts to deprivation.
so in now...esp because of this post.
I know right? Cutting out cookies, soda pop, and pizza is now "deprivation". Lolz. 'Merica!
Couldn't care less about soda though and I'm now extremely picky about my pizza.
Deprivation is in the eye of the beholder. I tend to think Carlos is right in his assessment - self control and deliberate eating (whether that comes in the form of eliminating certain foods or just limiting calories overall) is not really "deprivation" in the truest sense (you aren't being deprived of anything necessary for life). Now, *feeling* deprived is totally subjective. You would feel deprived if you went long enough without cookies, so much so you would end up binging, but working some in, even if it is a small portion, and even if it crowds out other more filling foods, keeps you from feeling deprived. I'm just the opposite - I would feel deprived with the one or two cookies I might be able to work in, especially when they edge out other more satiating foods and leave me hungry, but if I don't have them at all, I'm perfectly fine and don't miss them. Different strokes.
But his point still stands - calling going without excess "deprivation" is silly. Going without excess is just normal. The excess is what causes the need for "deprivation" in the first place. If we would have just ate what we needed, and no more, all along, there would be no need to "deprive".
Going without excess isn't what's needed for fat loss. We must go without enough to maintain before fat stores will be used. We must deprive our bodies of food fuel.
True. I guess my point was, if we hadn't been overindulging (excess), we wouldn't need to deprive. In terms of the "long haul" (what the OP was about), no, deprivation isn't necessary, so long as you never went to excess in the first place. Deprivation in the context of weight loss is simply paying the piper, so to speak. Overeating, getting fat, then whining about "deprivation" (when it's time to pay the piper and lose the weight), is a first world problem. That said, we do all have to 'pick our deprivation' and decide what is easier for us to go without.
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