Dating and dieting

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Replies

  • bbell1985
    bbell1985 Posts: 4,571 Member
    Wow, you are all awesome!. I'm sorry I can't reply to each of you individually. So here's the thing, I actually love going out on dates. Sometimes they're awesome, sometimes they're not. My date tonight with a second date and it was pretty wonderful. If I met some guy who I was comfortable with I would be happy to cook at home or reduced to eating to a level I was comfortable with. The problem is first, Second, third dates. I need to get to the level that I'm comfortable with cutting back the food and letting them know I'm careful about what I eat. I want to have fun and I don't want to seem like a downer... Plus, food and whiskey! Who doesn't love that?

    Remember that you can have a say in the restaurant too. You can pick a place you'd think he'd like, while looking at the menu first for yourself. Maybe you can't fit in the steak and potatoes, but whiskey and a big salad with shrimp? Sure.
  • CafeRacer808
    CafeRacer808 Posts: 2,396 Member
    edited February 2017
    Wow, you are all awesome!. I'm sorry I can't reply to each of you individually. So here's the thing, I actually love going out on dates. Sometimes they're awesome, sometimes they're not. My date tonight with a second date and it was pretty wonderful. If I met some guy who I was comfortable with I would be happy to cook at home or reduced to eating to a level I was comfortable with. The problem is first, Second, third dates. I need to get to the level that I'm comfortable with cutting back the food and letting them know I'm careful about what I eat. I want to have fun and I don't want to seem like a downer... Plus, food and whiskey! Who doesn't love that?

    I love Scotch and I'm a foodie (although I hate that word). Now that I'm trying to lose weight, I moderate my intake. But that doesn't make me a downer. And I wouldn't consider a woman who's not eating or drinking a lot to be downer either. Your personality is what determines whether or not you're a downer, not what you decide to eat or drink. ;)
  • CafeRacer808
    CafeRacer808 Posts: 2,396 Member
    bbell1985 wrote: »
    Wow, you are all awesome!. I'm sorry I can't reply to each of you individually. So here's the thing, I actually love going out on dates. Sometimes they're awesome, sometimes they're not. My date tonight with a second date and it was pretty wonderful. If I met some guy who I was comfortable with I would be happy to cook at home or reduced to eating to a level I was comfortable with. The problem is first, Second, third dates. I need to get to the level that I'm comfortable with cutting back the food and letting them know I'm careful about what I eat. I want to have fun and I don't want to seem like a downer... Plus, food and whiskey! Who doesn't love that?

    Remember that you can have a say in the restaurant too. You can pick a place you'd think he'd like, while looking at the menu first for yourself. Maybe you can't fit in the steak and potatoes, but whiskey and a big salad with shrimp? Sure.

    Yup, this. Suggest a tapas place or a gastropub-type bar that has a good appetizer menu. You could also suggest meeting up for happy hour, which is usually all about small plates.
  • NoAnalHere
    NoAnalHere Posts: 97 Member
    I don't go on 3-4 dates a week but I understand!

    1. My advice is to bank your calories! You know at least a day in advance before a date right? So eat lighter that day then eat most of your calories later. Going out most of the week seems to be your usual so make your CICO (calories in calories out) fit your lifestyle because this isn't a special treat that happens once in a while to splurge so don't treat it as such and stick to your calorie counting.

    2. Another suggestion is you suggest the place to go out to, so your familiar with the place and plan ahead.

    3. Yes first dates and culture center around food but you don't have to let it. Instead of foods and drinks how about drinks + an activity or food + activity.
  • K3rB3ar89
    K3rB3ar89 Posts: 263 Member
    Ugh i lost 40 dated my husband and gained it back... i just stopped paying attention. I feel your pain. Its not worth it
  • Katimira
    Katimira Posts: 50 Member


    Whenever I'm going out, I try to burn "drink calories" on the treadmill. In my head, 500 calories = 3 or 4 drinks (depending on what I'm drinking).

  • bbell1985
    bbell1985 Posts: 4,571 Member
    Katimira wrote: »

    Whenever I'm going out, I try to burn "drink calories" on the treadmill. In my head, 500 calories = 3 or 4 drinks (depending on what I'm drinking).

    how you getting 4 drinks out of 500 calories?
  • K3rB3ar89
    K3rB3ar89 Posts: 263 Member
    3 or 4 drinks is WAY above 500... you may wanna play around with mfp. Alcohol and pop is loaded with calories. Its scary..
  • abrubru
    abrubru Posts: 137 Member
    bbell1985 wrote: »

    Don't let it stress you now though. It can be fun, it can be horrible, and yes some thought goes into dieting around it. But, you don't NEED to go on 3 dates per week. When you're ready, you can go on as many or as little as you want :)

    The biggest problem for me now is where does a 40 year old woman go to meet men that are single, intelligent, educated, working and relatively attractive? I am working on me, and if a "he" comes along, I'm willing to try!

  • JaydedMiss
    JaydedMiss Posts: 4,286 Member
    K3rB3ar89 wrote: »
    3 or 4 drinks is WAY above 500... you may wanna play around with mfp. Alcohol and pop is loaded with calories. Its scary..

    Not really light beer is under 100 per...A shot of hard in diet coke is to. Just likely not when going out to bars your likely to get bigger portions XD
  • K3rB3ar89
    K3rB3ar89 Posts: 263 Member
    1 ounce of vodka alone is about 100 calories. That doesnt account for pop or any "special" drinks.
  • DeficitDuchess
    DeficitDuchess Posts: 3,099 Member
    When I was attempting to date, my 1st goal was to; seek someone either already healthy or making sound progress, to be. Living the same type of, lifestyle'll make it easier to; decide now & later where to eat, you'll both bring something like; a picnic and/or do something active like, a hike before/after to, still hopefully stay on track!

    For 1st dates I, don't believe they should begin as an elaborate production; coffee's fine & you don't even've to stay in the cafe while drinking it, walk somewhere outside away from people that'll easily; overhear you getting to know each other. Agree beforehand that it's casual/dressy so, no wondering how; much/little to dress, etc. Mention where'd you be coming from. A gym well you'll be in athletic clothing, work well you'll be in a uniform, suit, etc.
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  • abrubru
    abrubru Posts: 137 Member
    bbell1985 wrote: »
    Katimira wrote: »

    Whenever I'm going out, I try to burn "drink calories" on the treadmill. In my head, 500 calories = 3 or 4 drinks (depending on what I'm drinking).

    how you getting 4 drinks out of 500 calories?

    If you are just drinking shots of hard liquor...or something on the rocks. And you can always mix with diet soda instead of juices or reg soda.
  • abrubru
    abrubru Posts: 137 Member
    @ OP: You can have a whiskey up or on the rocks for under 100 calories...although I prefer vodka for that.
  • K3rB3ar89
    K3rB3ar89 Posts: 263 Member
    Im also canadian.. our light beer is 95-125 calories. But who just drinks? There's MANY factors.. after 2 or 3 you wanna eat too
  • JaydedMiss
    JaydedMiss Posts: 4,286 Member
    K3rB3ar89 wrote: »
    Im also canadian.. our light beer is 95-125 calories. But who just drinks? There's MANY factors.. after 2 or 3 you wanna eat too

    I like your back tracking LOL. I only drink just fine. Its called self control ;) I saved up for my alcohol i get my alcohol
  • subcounter
    subcounter Posts: 2,382 Member
    I mean I guess this heavily depends on the person. I am not much for expensive dinner first dates, and I find them boring. They don't give an impression about you ever, rather your trivial choices in that moment. There is nothing wrong with being straight forward about your nutrition either.

    A good date for example was just walking around town, stopping by small craft shops, talking about everything and nothing. I think I remember 8 hours non stop talking with small rests in between my fav coffee shop, some random benches, and few buildings I know the designs of (Amazing views from the roof). The places were rather just slight background changes. I guess this heavily depends on the town though. Tokyo is amazing on foot.
  • K3rB3ar89
    K3rB3ar89 Posts: 263 Member
    All im saying is no where here csn you find light beer for much less then 100 calories. Beer is gross and unless your drinking straight up alcohol 500 calories would be hard to meet. Its got nothing to do with self control. I dont even drink.. going out is a very difficult thing for most.. thats what this post was about. Who cares about YOUR self control
  • JaydedMiss
    JaydedMiss Posts: 4,286 Member
    im canadian... I know whats here
  • JaydedMiss
    JaydedMiss Posts: 4,286 Member
    edited February 2017
    if no one cares about my self control why are you saying EVERYONE wants to eat after alcohol. Why does your opinion count if mine doesnt. 500 calories is plenty for 3-4 drinks its not WAY over

    by the way you straight up asked who only just drinks and then got mad when i responded. Interesting
  • NoAnalHere
    NoAnalHere Posts: 97 Member
    subcounter wrote: »
    I mean I guess this heavily depends on the person. I am not much for expensive dinner first dates, and I find them boring. They don't give an impression about you ever, rather your trivial choices in that moment. There is nothing wrong with being straight forward about your nutrition either.

    A good date for example was just walking around town, stopping by small craft shops, talking about everything and nothing. I think I remember 8 hours non stop talking with small rests in between my fav coffee shop, some random benches, and few buildings I know the designs of (Amazing views from the roof). The places were rather just slight background changes. I guess this heavily depends on the town though. Tokyo is amazing on foot.


    Totally agree. I'm not going to be spending a lot of money on first dates. It's a "can I be around this person for long periods of time" I understand breaking the ice with a drink (I'm 24 that's our default) but drinks get expensive and the logical part of my brain is "I don't know how much they drink what if a drunk stranger turns super bad" and I need to put my best foot forward with judgment and not be buzzed on a date.

    But I also live in NYC which gives me the luxury of easily finding outdoor activities besides food and drinks someone from a rural or suburbs might not have the same luxury
  • JaydedMiss
    JaydedMiss Posts: 4,286 Member
    subcounter wrote: »
    I mean I guess this heavily depends on the person. I am not much for expensive dinner first dates, and I find them boring. They don't give an impression about you ever, rather your trivial choices in that moment. There is nothing wrong with being straight forward about your nutrition either.

    A good date for example was just walking around town, stopping by small craft shops, talking about everything and nothing. I think I remember 8 hours non stop talking with small rests in between my fav coffee shop, some random benches, and few buildings I know the designs of (Amazing views from the roof). The places were rather just slight background changes. I guess this heavily depends on the town though. Tokyo is amazing on foot.

    I bet you make your dates swoon thats awesome :P
  • K3rB3ar89
    K3rB3ar89 Posts: 263 Member
    Because normally if you sit at a place on a date you have acouple drinks and eat food or snack. You visit and talk.. sounds like a sloppy date if your there too just drink. Maybe we have diff ideas of a date. If i went on a date im not going to say nope can't eat drank over calories.. lol... your there to enjoy yourself
  • JaydedMiss
    JaydedMiss Posts: 4,286 Member
    K3rB3ar89 wrote: »
    Because normally if you sit at a place on a date you have acouple drinks and eat food or snack. You visit and talk.. sounds like a sloppy date if your there too just drink. Maybe we have diff ideas of a date. If i went on a date im not going to say nope can't eat drank over calories.. lol... your there to enjoy yourself

    Your entire arguement was ...and ill quote...Now your argueing about this? Im so confused on what your point is
    K3rB3ar89 wrote: »
    3 or 4 drinks is WAY above 500... you may wanna play around with mfp. Alcohol and pop is loaded with calories. Its scary..

    Im so done :neutral:
  • K3rB3ar89
    K3rB3ar89 Posts: 263 Member
    You must be such a fun date;)
  • JaydedMiss
    JaydedMiss Posts: 4,286 Member
    edited February 2017
    nice. Jabbing at me when your proven wrong XD Classy

    Sorry OP I was being helpful before this XD
    K3rB3ar89 wrote: »
    You must be such a fun date;)

  • K3rB3ar89
    K3rB3ar89 Posts: 263 Member
    I was never proven wrong by anything. I was making a point. Dates usually involve food and alcohol. As said its the "default". Your basically arguing that im wrong because if i was it wouldnt be the topic of HOW TO AVOID IT. So good for you to say you have self control and can have 3 or 4 drinks without food. Most people dont have the control. And no MOST drinks people want to drink are over the limit. Realistically most people will NOT drink ONLY within the limit because realistically everyone loves the drinks that arent healthy and they wouldnt be anyone's first choice.


  • K3rB3ar89
    K3rB3ar89 Posts: 263 Member
    My advise to the op is..have fun eat drink what you want. You deserve one night a week to do what you want but dont lose sight of your goal ciz its easy to fall off the wagon and forget about whats important
  • JaydedMiss
    JaydedMiss Posts: 4,286 Member
    edited February 2017
    K3rB3ar89 wrote: »
    My advise to the op is..have fun eat drink what you want. You deserve one night a week to do what you want but dont lose sight of your goal ciz its easy to fall off the wagon and forget about whats important
    I need help. How do you balance dating and dieting? I've lost 50 pounds in the last year and feel confident and pretty for the first time in forever. I still have a little ways to go but I'm comfortable with where I'm at. My question is how do I balance dating and dieting? I want to go out and I want to eat all the food and I want to drink all the drinks and I want to meet all the boys. The problem is I can't fit this in my calorie range. I don't want to unload the whole "I used to be fat" thing right away. Yes, I really enjoy the smoke meats and whiskey and I enjoy a carefree evening. The problem is I have three or four of these a week... What in the hell am I supposed to do?

    3-4 isnt one night a week. But yeah she should do her thing she clearly enjoys it so thats her priorities