I DO NOT WANT my cake and I DO NOT WANT to eat it too...
shartran
Posts: 304 Member
Is it rude to refuse a piece of my own birthday cake?
My sister-in-law always purchases a store bought cake
for my birthday. I do not eat dessert/packaged or, in my view,
'unhealthy'(sugar, fat and other 'questionable' food-like products)items.
Will it be rude to refuse a piece? What can I say to her when I'm offered a
piece?
Thanks!!
My sister-in-law always purchases a store bought cake
for my birthday. I do not eat dessert/packaged or, in my view,
'unhealthy'(sugar, fat and other 'questionable' food-like products)items.
Will it be rude to refuse a piece? What can I say to her when I'm offered a
piece?
Thanks!!
0
Replies
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Can you tell her in advance? That way there won't be an awkward moment. Happy birthday!0
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Is there something else you would want in place of a standard birthday cake, that you could request?
As long as there are other people there to eat the cake, then I guess it's no big deal if you don't have any, but to keep it from being awkward, you could accept a small piece and then kind of play with it on your plate. No one is going to be watching you to make sure you actually eat it.
However, if you are only avoiding the cake because you have developed orthorexia, then that's very, very sad.0 -
Just have a piece! I promise it won't kill you.0
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Maybe you could have one cake for the guests and a "special" cake just for you. No one has to know it's different or healther.
If you don't want to go that route just take a piece, smile and say thank you. Then pick at it for a bit and put it down. Odds are no one will even notice.
Happy Birthday!0 -
Is there something else you would want in place of a standard birthday cake, that you could request?
As long as there are other people there to eat the cake, then I guess it's no big deal if you don't have any, but to keep it from being awkward, you could accept a small piece and then kind of play with it on your plate. No one is going to be watching you to make sure you actually eat it.
However, if you are only avoiding the cake because you have developed orthorexia, then that's very, very sad.
Beat me to it! :laugh:0 -
Happy birthday
Yea, id be bit offended if i were your SIL. She bought it out of love. A piece spoon fed probably wont destroy your body's cleanliness. Or you could take the slice she cuts for you and walk around the house entertaining ( if theres a party in store).. and then just throw bits and pieces out or leave it on a random table ("some random loser left cake lying around!"). I doubt she;ll be following you to see if you've eaten. Good luck & enjoy your day! 0 -
For my birthday for the last 4 years I have either had watermelon or some fruit medley.
Its my birthday and thats what I ask for.
The trouble at least for me is one piece leads to about 5 pieces.0 -
I'd call her before and just explain that you would prefer not to have anything, but thank her for thinking of you. Maybe suggest she gets an eatable arrangement instead of a cake if she still wants to get you something. I'd eat the cake, but that's just me.0
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Make a call and tell her that you'd love to change it up this year with a fruit pizza "cake"...it's still store bought, so minimal effort...plus WAY less calories, which is something everyone can enjoy!0
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I haven't had a piece of birthday cake on my birthday for a long time. Some birthdays, if there's a party (mine is the day before a holiday), we've had cake for everyone else. Cake is lots of fun!
What I know to be true is that you not having cake doesn't have to be a big deal. If you don't make a fuss, no one else will.
I would most definitely talk to your sister before the day. That is just common sense -- hash it out ahead of time so that there isn't any drama in the moment.
Anyone who tries to get you to have some, you can just politely say "Oh, no thanks, I really don't want any. Maybe later. And by the way I just love your outfit, where did you find it?" Just deflect the focus away from you and cake.
On my birthday I eat seafood, lots and lots of seafood, drenched in tons of butter. Make sure you still treat yourself to something that you love.0 -
you could accept a small piece and then kind of play with it on your plate. No one is going to be watching you to make sure you actually eat it.
That's such an anorexic strategy. A small slice of birthday cake won't kill the OP, or make her fat.
However, if she doesn't ENJOY birthday cake, there are a number of different things she could request as an alternative. For instance -> http://www.babble.com/babble-voices/invitation-only-rachel-faucett/5-alternative-birthday-cakes-youll-love/
Just google "alternatives to birthday cakes."0 -
Eat a small piece.
You don't have to gorge on it, besides it was a really kind gesture of her to think of you and buy it.
Or, just feed it to me. I'll eat the cake.0 -
It's your birthday.
tell her what you want.
They might enjoy the challenge
I was bad.. i ate all kinds of cake. (I got 2 bought for me!! and both of them ended up at my house, plus my son made me cake pops and cookie muffins for my birthday.. UGH Be glad you're only worried about one!!)
but i wont' do that again.. I am STILL reeling from it..
ETA: how about fruit dipped in vanilla yogurt and rolled in nuts?0 -
Or you could just have the piece of cake and everyone is happy!?0
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I would eat a tiny bit and not make a big deal.
If you refuse, and than if you EVER eat a piece of desert or anything unhealthy in front of any of these people, you will look like a crazy .&****.
I have a friend who is on and off vegetarian. One week she will be torturing the waiter regarding if broth has touched any meat and such, and next week she will be eating said meat. It is incredibly annoying and, of course, we can't take her seriously! It just looks like she wants attention all the time.0 -
Are you currently getting treated for an eating disorder? ( as per previous posts) if so I would discuss this with your therapist. IMO it would be good for you to have a slice of cake. No foods are unhealthy in moderation and you need fats and sugar as part of a balanced diet.0
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Will it be rude to refuse a piece? What can I say to her when I'm offered a
piece?
Thanks!!
yes. it would be rude.
and you answered your own question... you say Thanks!!!0 -
It's never rude, unless you say so rudely.
Case in point - I HATE butter-cream. (with a passion) Bunch of friends bought me a butter-cream cake. I blew out the candles, excused myself, and grabbed a beer. When they asked if I was having any I said I was drinking my carbs.0 -
Highly rude. Your sister went out of her way to get you a cake.
Tell her ahead of time for a different kind of cake, and get off your high horse for the sake of family. Its one day out of the year.
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If the cake is for you, tell her in advance what you would prefer in its place. If the cake is actually for the other people celebrating with you, then there's nothing wrong with politely refusing.
I'm not against eating cake, but as someone who doesn't really like cake I have refused my own bday cake. People know that I don't like cake. No heads exploded. Overall, people were so busy eating cake that they enjoy that zero ****s were given.0 -
Is it rude to refuse a piece of my own birthday cake?
My sister-in-law always purchases a store bought cake
for my birthday. I do not eat dessert/packaged or, in my view,
'unhealthy'(sugar, fat and other 'questionable' food-like products)items.
Will it be rude to refuse a piece? What can I say to her when I'm offered a
piece?
Thanks!!
how dare she!
HOW DARE SHE BUY YOU A BIRTHDAY CAKE!
disown her.
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Is it rude to refuse a piece of my own birthday cake?
My sister-in-law always purchases a store bought cake
for my birthday. I do not eat dessert/packaged or, in my view,
'unhealthy'(sugar, fat and other 'questionable' food-like products)items.
Will it be rude to refuse a piece? What can I say to her when I'm offered a
piece?
Thanks!!
Neither sugar or fat are unhealthy without context and dosage taken into consideration, so your logic is flawed0 -
Can I has your cake? I was under on fats and carbs last night.0
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Just posted this over the weekend among me and my friends:
?Why are people afraid to turn down food? I've seen so many people discuss eating simply to be polite. I don't believe in this whatsoever. I have a right to control EVERY bit of food that goes into my mouth regardless of whose feelings it might hurt. Would you do drugs just to avoid hurting someone's feelings or just because some authority figure presented it to you? Heck, I turned down my own birthday cake at work this year. Is it really that you're trying to be polite, or is it an easy excuse? Or am I just a really nasty person with no regards for the feelings of others?"
If I'm mean and nasty, then I'm mean and nasty. If you're a family member, friend or co-worker YOU KNOW I'm trying to lose weight and busting my *kitten* to do so. If you STILL choose to buy me a cake - SORRY about your hurt feelings. You knew better.........0 -
My mom always love to make Birthday cakes. This year i asked her in advance to make me a paleo watermelon cake. It was delicious and refreshing and nobody complained about not having real cake.0
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It's never rude, unless you say so rudely.
Case in point - I HATE butter-cream. (with a passion) Bunch of friends bought me a butter-cream cake. I blew out the candles, excused myself, and grabbed a beer. When they asked if I was having any I said I was drinking my carbs.
Hate buttercream??? GASP!!!0 -
It's up to you what you want to eat. It's not rude.
But if you take somebody's homebrew but only drink half the bottle leave the other half sitting around, then that's rude.0 -
It would be rude to let her waste her money and time. If you really don't want it ask her not to buy a cake. Or she can buy a cake for others to enjoy and you can have what you want for your birthday. It is a nice gesture and you can't expect others to adhere to your extreme no-cake diet, but I'm sure there is a simple compromise.0
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No, it's not rude. At our company, we went out and bought a big expensive cake for our boss's birthday - and we even had a surprise party for him. Come to find out he doesn't eat eggs so he had to refuse to eat the cake.
He thanked us profusely though so we did feel our efforts were appreciated.0 -
Rude in the extreme.
Eat the cake. Smile. Thank her with all the sincerity that you should be felling for someone that cares enough to do something nice for you.
Step away from the center of the universe and show a little grace.0
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