WOMEN AGES 50+ FOR AUGUST 2017

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  • csofled
    csofled Posts: 3,022 Member
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  • OregonMother
    OregonMother Posts: 1,664 Member
    KetoneKaren wrote: »
    Katla and KJ You have NO IDEA how much I would like to speak to my son about how he approaches Griffin. I don't dare. One time I asked him if I could make a small suggestion about something I had observed about his communication with my daughter-in-law. He went ballistic and without me really knowing what was up, "invited" me to a therapy session with him, where he and his "therapist" proceeded to beat up on me. I was supposed to just listen and echo back what he was saying to me to be sure I understood my crime. It was a total ambush.

    This is the same guy that wrote a letter to me after my partner and I started our relationship that was nothing short of ugly. He accused me of abandoning my family and friends for my partner (patently false) and used rhetoric that was damaging to our relationship with him. I have never figured out where that vitriol came from, but it was extremely damaging to my partner and I, and we have been very wary ever since.

    Since then, my daughter-in-law has found her spine and holds her own with him. She can bring him to his knees, and believe me, that is a good thing. She is remarkable. My son truly adores his wife and children and they adore him, despite of his faults. Griffin just wants to please his dad, ever since he was a tiny boy, and it just doesn't happen very often. Not sure he adores me, despite our great relationship when he was a boy. I love him so much but as I said, I don't like the adult him very much. He turned from such a wonderful little boy into such an *kitten*. Part of the problem is, he is very intelligent and he IS right so much of the time, that when he gets on his Badger suit and starts haranguing it is just unbearable, because he is "right" in quotes, but he isn't really right because his approach is so wrong.

    Ugh.

    Glad to get that off my chest.

    Karen in Virginia

    p.s. this is a photo taken yesterday of my grandkids and their momma:

    kjqwx8vdahfk.jpg

    Just hugs, Karen. <3

    Felicia
    Willamette Valley, Oregon
  • Machka9
    Machka9 Posts: 25,611 Member
    The waves are loud tonight. There's only about a 1 metre swell at most, so it must be the direction they're coming in that makes them sound loud.

    But I love it when they are loud ... love the sound of waves. :)
  • grandmallie
    grandmallie Posts: 10,095 Member
    Well guess who didn't show up to the deposition ,Tom and his lawyer..ughhh it's all going to come back and bite him in the butt.
  • janetr7476
    janetr7476 Posts: 4,001 Member
    grandmallie wrote: »
    Well guess who didn't show up to the deposition ,Tom and his lawyer..ughhh it's all going to come back and bite him in the butt.

    Yes, it will. Hang in there.

    Janetr okc
  • margaretturk
    margaretturk Posts: 5,258 Member
    Allie I agree he is playing games with you. Breathe and have your lawyer handle it. Agree time to have him move out and change your locks before he does it to you. It is his problem to find a place to live.

    :heart: Margaret
  • OregonMother
    OregonMother Posts: 1,664 Member
    grandmallie wrote: »
    Well guess who didn't show up to the deposition ,Tom and his lawyer..ughhh it's all going to come back and bite him in the butt.

    This is ridiculous! I'm so sorry, Allie. Dragging it out isn't going to make it any easier for him.

    Felicia
    Willamette Valley, Oregon
  • trulydivyn725
    trulydivyn725 Posts: 92 Member
    My August Goals:
    ~ Stay under 1500 calories daily - not including exercise ---
    8/1 = 1,289 8/2 = 1,151 8/3 = 1,295 8/4 = 1,780 8/5 = 1,390
    8/6 = 1,323 8/7 = 1,454 8/8 = 1,275
    ~ Walk 5k steps daily ---
    8/1 = no app 8/2 = no app 8/3 = 3,980 8/4 = 4,675 8/5 = 7,306
    8/6 = 3,374 8/7 = 3,132 8/8 = 2,852
    ~ Plexus regimen ---
    8/1 = yes 8/2 = yes 8/3 = yes 8/4 = yes 8/5 = yes
    8/6 = no 8/7 = yes 8/8 = yes
    ~ WATER equal or exceeding 64 ounces ---
    8/1 = 80 oz 8/2 = 72 oz 8/3 = 64 oz 8/4 = 70 oz 8/5 = ??
    8/6 = ?? 8/7 = 66 oz 8/8 = 70 oz

    Much love and respect from Vegas,
    Dorrie aka TrulyDivyn
  • coastalgosgal
    coastalgosgal Posts: 2,900 Member

    Becca How did your kids do in the apartment hunting? Hope they were successful. Glad you are enjoying their visit.
    One of you lovely ladies posts anchors. What do they mean? I'm sure as a newcomer, that I missed that. :)
    Have a great week everyone! Pray for our fires to stop please. thanks! Bear Lady Weez'[/quote]

    Lady Weed, they found an apartment complex they like! More expensive than the place we have! I am happy for them! I post the anchors, just to save my place where I read to! Stay safe from the fires!
    Becca
    Oregon

  • Peach1948
    Peach1948 Posts: 2,473 Member
    Karen in VA ~ Thanks for sharing about your relationship with you son. My husband can be very over bearing…loud, in your face, etc…so I know what you mean. I decided many, many years ago that therapists were a waste of my money.

    Pip ~ That is a great picture of you and Kirt with short hair. I like that on both of you.

    Alison ~ So sorry you’ve been bamboozled again. Shame on T.

    My DH’s BnL (who I have mentioned before as being widowed for over 40 yrs) is really giving us problems. My DH is the one he counts on to come when he is having health problems. Lately, he keeps calling to say he can’t get out of bed because his blood pressure is low and he feels dizzy. This is the third time my husband has had to go make sure he is all right. Second time this week. He has not bothered to call his doctor to let him know. DH told him he needs to get this taken care of because he may not always be there to come. He is 73 so not that old in our day and time.

    Carol in GA
  • trulydivyn725
    trulydivyn725 Posts: 92 Member
    ~ Lenora - I could write for a few hours on the topic of my "prince" currently, but this isn't the forum for that. I really enjoyed reading how your family fell in love, because this has quickly turned into something I can't define yet - I just know it's not infatuation for either of us! Actions ALWAYS speak louder than words, and at this point I have no misgivings or reason for pause. Each day has been as good if not better than the last. I'm REALLY looking forward to spending more time with him - not electronically, but actually together. He knows I'm off Fri/Sat/Sun for my normal work week (I work 4x10's) and has asked if he can kidnap me Thursday evening too. Not just the wine and canvas date already planned, but he wants my "Thursday nights too"... Direct quote from his text last night...... "let's just set this up on your busy calendar that Thursday night and Friday are mine. Saturday you spend with your family, as you should, but I want all day Sunday too. I'll help you with your homework if I have to so I can get that much time with you. It's becoming more and more difficult to not see you every day"....

    I'm giggling because normally I'd be asking myself if he's a stalker, or a control freak, which neither is true. You'd have to see the entire conversation to understand that he is very serious, very sweet and sincerely trying to get as much of my time as he can. He's retired, so has a lot of idle time to "come up with a master plan, since you're so busy working"...no, he doesn't resent my career..."I want to be the best man you've ever been with, even if I have to wash your socks by hand"...I LOL every time I read that...it's very typical of his humor!

    ~ Machka - thank you, and I KNOW RIGHT!!?!!

    Much love and respect from Vegas,
    Dorrie aka TrulyDivyn
  • skuehn48
    skuehn48 Posts: 3,046 Member
    <3
  • pipcd34
    pipcd34 Posts: 17,266 Member
    M
  • cityjaneLondon
    cityjaneLondon Posts: 12,710 Member
    Hi all,
    Had a great day in Stockholm. Mainly orientation as we have a whole day tomorrow.
    The chef cooked us a special fish curry and came and talked to us afterwards. They always make a special effort to make what you like. The waiters remember every preference and keep back special cheese for me. The chef said the waiters are genius. He is right.
    ABBA evening tonight. Then a rock show on deck till late. We are so tired!!!!! It is all irresistible.
    Love Heather UK XXXXXX
  • SophieRosieMom
    SophieRosieMom Posts: 3,658 Member
    edited August 2017
    Karen in VA, (((HUGS))). So glad you and Griffin's mom are there for him. How is Jillian doing through Griffin's rough times? Is she older? I can't recall. Anyhow, super cute photo of mom and the kids! Looks like they were having some great fun!

    Tere - WOW on those shoes. Thirty years ago I would have armwrestled you for them, lol. Beautiful and I love the ankle strap - I can't believe I used to wear 2" heels at work all day, for years without my feet complaining. Now they are yelling at me when I just look at the picture, LOL. Arthritis has won.

    Machka - I too adore the sound of the waves. And thanks for the website about Mammals of Australia! Very, very informative. So fascinating how animals on different continents evolved. We have lots of opossums around here and sometimes I see them with babies on their backs. They might not be pretty but do a great clean-up job.

    Dorrie - did you and your DBF (Dear Boy Friend <3 if that's his status) find each other online? We have many friends who have great relationships and successful marriages with spouses they found online that were "pre-vetted" by the questionnaires. If I ever am in the situation where I was looking for companionship, online or not, I think I'd do a credit check and criminal history check - just because I used to work in law enforcement and used to do pre-employment background checks on 911 dispatchers. The neighbors would be surprised at all I know about them from online resources.... just something I do when I'm bored, lol. Kind of scary all the information that a person thinks is private is now published for the whole world to see. :(

    Being willing to wash your socks is a definite plus in my book! B)

    Carol - hope your DH's Bnl calls the doctor! That's a lot of responsibility on your DH to expect him to run over and check on him. 73 does seem young!

    Becca - glad the kids found a place in Vancouver and also glad you and Prudence are back where you started. Nice to be able to smile and say "Hi" to someone you bump into instead of quickly darting around a corner to avoid eye contact, LOL. Which I've done a time or two!

    NYKaren - congrats on the hike! Fun chatting about what the "kids" are up to!

    Heather - love all the vacation photo's! Stockholm is very charming. Are you fluent in Swedish or do they speak English there too? ABBA and a rock show - I'd say you are getting your money's worth! So nice the chef and waiters give personal attention like that.

    OK ladies, that's the quick catch-up.

    Lanette
    SW WA State



  • jmkmomm
    jmkmomm Posts: 3,247 Member
    .
  • DamitJanit
    DamitJanit Posts: 1,329 Member
    Call me crazy but I love to see other people happy and succeeding .

    Good Evening my dear Friends,

    Jeanne, welcome. I’m the one that is active in the Women of the Moose. Obviously your mom was also. I have just been a member for 3 years so this is my first year on the board at our lodge. I went to my first International Convention the end of June and thoroughly enjoyed it. Are you a member? What part of Texas are you in? I’m sure you see that we have other Texans with us. Come often for great support.

    Rye, one thing about this group is we allow venting any time from anyone.. Feel free to vent away and I do hope the flashes will diminish soon!

    Tere, what darling shoes. OMG there is no way I could wear a heel like that! I’m just now back in a 2” heel since losing weight. My back is not too crazy about any.

    Chris, I do hope you don’t develop a cold or something before your date. You will have to give us all the details. <3

    KarenVA, glad your DGS is home. I hope his dad will let up long enough for him to relax a bit. I know my DD feels the same from DH. It’s really too bad that our sweet, loving children sometimes turn into adults that we don’t like as much. Great picture of the grands and DDIL.

    Pip, what a great picture of you and Kirby. I just love your hair short.

    M, I love the sound of waves, too. If I could afford it we would live right by the ocean so I could hear that every night.

    CarolGA, maybe the next time your BIL calls your DH, ya’ll should just pick him up and take him to the doctor or the ER? >:) Is he trying to take care of himself or just wants company?

    Dorrie, your new beau sure sounds like a “Keeper” so far. Do keep giving us details.

    Heather, your trip sounds wonderful and do keep the pictures coming when you can.

    I really just need to vent so feel free to skip this part. I just don’t have anyone else I can talk to about this because I’m too embarrassed. My DD obviously has some mental problems or is just a mean, nasty person. She and her father, my sweet DH just can’t seem to get along at all. She doesn’t want anyone talking to her when she first gets up in the morning or will snap your head off. When she gets home from work, she wants to unwind before you can even say, “how was your day?” She wants everything (including where groceries are placed in the fridge) her way and will tell you so in very snotty tone. If you move anything of hers she attacks like we are trying to harm her. Now mind you, she will move and rearrange our things every day. She seems to just snap at the drop of a hat and it doesn’t seem to matter what’s going on. Her father is beginning to seriously dislike her and the problem is, she can’t afford to live on her own. She is so unpleasant that she could never have a roommate, so that’s out. We had to help her financially while she was in Oregon to the point that it was draining our retirement. Needless to say it is making home life very unpleasant. I can get along with her much of the time because I just ignore a lot of what she does, although it’s not unusual to really get my feelings hurt by her. I pray every day that we can all get along but I don’t see anything improving. She can just say such mean and hurtful things and in a tone that makes you want to….I don’t even know what??? She comes home from work and starts drinking beer and will have 5 to 8 every night. If you say anything about the amount she drinks, she is in denial and gets angry. I know that’s a problem but don’t know what to do about it. OK..vent over. Thanks. I wrote this last night but didn’t post it. Today has been better so far with just a few minor altercations. I hope she and DH don’t get into it while I’m at the Moose tonight. He said he just doesn’t plan to talk to her unless he has to.
    This was on FB today and immediately made me think of all of you:
    Dear God, Please keep my family and friends safe. Please watch over them always and let good health, happiness and good fortune befall them. Amen

    Sending love, good thoughts and cool sunshine to all of you.

    I Love youwriting-a-love-letter-smiley-emoticon.gif
    DJ
    Myrtle Beach, SC
  • Katla49
    Katla49 Posts: 10,385 Member
    Allie: NYKaren has the right idea. You do seem to be moving on and I'm thrilled for you. I hope the bumps ahead are mainly felt on Tom's side and that you get a fair outcome. :flowerforyou:

    Karen in VA: I'm sorry the relationship with your son is difficult. It does sound as though he has problems with others, as well. I hope your DDIL continues to keep things on a positive track for the kids & the marriage. :star:

    Heather: You look great in Stockholm, and in blue. :smiley: I saw ABBA perform live at Mac Court in Eugene, OR, more than 47 years ago. They were fabulous! I'll enjoy them again vicariously through you. :bigsmile: I also saw Van Cliburn play the piano back in those days. The memories of both performances are fresh, clear and happy. :heart: Simon & Garfunkel played there, too. Paul Simon made the performance shine. Art Garfunkle had a cold and was grumpy. Poor guy. :ohwell:

    Kate, UK: I had my gallbladder out a number of years ago. I got the earliest surgery appointment I could, but we went on vacation before my surgery date & I had an attack that was pretty bad while boating with friends. I think cheesy appetizers might have been the trigger. We were in Longview, Washington at the time and somebody took me to the local hospital. It was a near thing for me. I almost had to have emergency surgery but I got through the attack okay and had the surgery after I got home. In the end I had only one gallstone and it was the size of a robin's egg. You will be so glad once it is done. :heart:

    Pip: I said I'd support your ride but haven't heard how to make my contribution yet. Please send me a "how to" message. (((HUGS)))

    Becca: It makes sense that the apartment your DS and DDIL found is more expensive. The whole Portland Metro area is experiencing a huge surge in housing costs. That would include Vancouver. We're seeing quite a lot of building new housing here in St Helens, and I expect costs to be less than Portland, but more than they've been here in the past. :ohwell:


    Yesterday we planned to take the Passat back to the VW dealer due to problems with the instrument panel not lighting up. Today it has been perfect, so we didn't go. We'll keep an eye on it. The air here has not been perfect, though. It is still hazy with smoke from distant fires.

    Katla in beautiful NW Oregon

    "That which doesn't kill us, makes us stronger." Friedrich Nietzsche
  • grandmallie
    grandmallie Posts: 10,095 Member
    Still at work,cousin found nothing wrong with computer..so going to pick that up tomorrow and then going to look at a table and chair set with barstools for 120.00 would fit lovely if I get condo.
  • KetoneKaren
    KetoneKaren Posts: 6,412 Member
    edited August 2017
    Allie Tom and his lawyer are poops.

    DJ Your daughter sounds a lot like my daughter-in-law's sister. Until her parents moved to assisted living, she lived with them, spent their money, and controlled as much of the environment as she could. She yelled and/or snapped at her parents and generally treated them with disrespect, all while ostensibly "helping" them (actually a nurse paid for by LTCI was doing most of the helping). She was a mooch. She is bipolar and has substance abuse problems and probably a personality disorder. Hardwired that way. It's unclear what she is going to do when the house sells and she can't live there anymore. My heart goes out to you. Your daughter is feeling entitled.

    Lanette My granddaughter is younger, Jillian is 8 and Griffin is 11. Jillian is pretty philosophical about what Griffin is going through. She is well-adjusted and does not have the same power struggles with her dad that Griffin does. Makes Griffin feel even worse for it to only be him. My son treats them differently.

    Karen in Virginia
  • janetr7476
    janetr7476 Posts: 4,001 Member
    edited August 2017
    DJ - I wish I had a magic answer for you. It does sound as if she needs to help in a couple of ways. We've been thru the same thing with my oldest grandson. I know it sounds heartless and you think you could never do it, but she needs a time limit to move out on her own. She could work two jobs (not easy but I did when my girls were small). She won't have you guys all her life and you do not owe her your retirement money nor peace of mind. That being said, my grandson was put out of my daughter's and her husband's home when he was only 17. It was gut wrenching to say the least. He'll turn 24 tomorrow and is currently living in a halfway type housing situation. He has a full time job and we are praying this time he makes it, but we've been here before too.

    Please keep you and your husband's welfare and quality of life first. You cannot be her safety net forever. Easier said than done, I know. I'll keep you all in my prayers and know that there are others of us here who have gone thru this situation. Much love. <3

    Janetr (#2) OKC

    PS I recommend a book titled " Setting Boundaries With Adult Children" has some helpful information
  • janetr7476
    janetr7476 Posts: 4,001 Member
    KetoneKaren wrote: »

    Lanette My granddaughter is younger, Jillian is 8 and Griffin is 11. Jillian is pretty philosophical about what Griffin is going through. She is well-adjusted and does not have the same power struggles with her dad that Griffin does. Makes Griffin feel even worse for it to only be him. My son treats them differently.

    Karen in Virginia

    Unfortunately, it seems many men are much harder on their sons. Ugh

    (((Hugs)))

    Janetr OKC
  • cityjaneLondon
    cityjaneLondon Posts: 12,710 Member
    DJ, - big (((HUGS))). I know I could not live with that, but hardening your heart is hard. Thank you for sharing. I echo Janetr <3. Grasp the nettle.

    Tonight's rock and roll session on the top deck was fantastic! :DB) So many old people letting it all hang out. We even did the Conga! :o:p I remembered my swing steps, but was not so good at the Jive. DH had a good try. We did the Twist as well.
    Going to try to get to the Vassa tomorrow. A medieval war ship that sank and is now preserved in a museum. Ferry ride to get there. Our ship leaves at 3.30pm for Helsinki. :D

    Love Heather UK XXXXXX
  • lhannon062709
    lhannon062709 Posts: 1,140 Member
    Mary! So good to see your smiling face...
  • grandmallie
    grandmallie Posts: 10,095 Member
    Evening Ladies
    I am up with Faith, and Buddy the dog.. Sean and Jean left a check for me for 225.00 so that will help with things..
    Will help Millie out in morning, then get my dgd and do some errands and have some fun.. will stop at the house and get the dogs out for a walk and then come up here again.
    Lisa - listened to that song by rascal flattest , Love it.. thanks for thinking of me. And thank all of you ladies for the love and helping me through this ordeal
    love ya all more than I can say <3
  • Katla49
    Katla49 Posts: 10,385 Member
    Mary: You look wonderful! What beautiful children. Thanks for sharing your picture. I agree with Lisa, it is good to see you. :bigsmile:
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