Less alcohol- January 2018- one day at a time

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  • lporter229
    lporter229 Posts: 4,907 Member
    edited January 2018
    jenifer7teen wrote: »
    lporter229 wrote: »
    For some reason I can't find my last post where I was tracking my drinks. Oh well. I have Friday, Saturday and Sunday to add to the list. I stuck to my plan and drank moderately all weekend. No headaches and no hangovers. It feels good to be in conscious control of my drinking, but at the same time, there is a part of me that still feels like I could (should?) do more.

    I am right with you girl. I still overdid it a bit on the weekend but spaced it out during a number of social things so i didnt feel any consequenses. Its a bit hard to participate in this thread where there seem to be a) so many people who drank far less, far regularly than i dud in the first place anf b) who have quit completely....
    Truly i am proud that i had more sober days than days involving alcohol...but i guess i feel i have such a warped perspective on normal that i dont know if i am doing okay or need to do more. So much depends on your experience and social circle i suppose. I dont have a single friend who doesnt drink... only my old/religious in-laws. And honestly they might abstain from alcohol but also seem unhappy and boring in many ways haha

    Anyway where is the balance!? Am i just trying to justify my habit? Or am i flawed in being part of a thread where everyone seems to barely drink now when thats never even been my goal?! Haha ahhh

    Yes. Yes. Yes. I feel very much the same, but honestly, I am really proud of ho my January turned out. I feel that if I truly wanted to abstain from drinking forever, I would put my mind to it and do it. But what I really want is to be able to be able to enjoy a few drinks with my husband or friends and know that I have control over it and not the other way around. Is this impossible for some people? Yes, I know that it is. Am I one of them? I am still not sure and that it what I am currently trying to figure out.

    Yes, I have had those nights too where I drank too much and swore I was going to cut down or stop drinking altogether only to find myself back in the same spot a few days later. But the difference for me now is that I never actually tried to control my alcohol consumption. I mean, sure, I said, I'll only have one or two, but that was just a vague statement rather than a goal. This month, I actually set a definitive goal for each day (e.g. no alcohol today, two glasses of wine, three glasses of wine for a Saturday party, etc), and with the exception of one extra cocktail, I pretty much stuck with my plan. And that was really my goal.

    On the other hand, like you, being on this thread has made me question the validity of those goals. Three glasses of wine at a party on a Saturday night? Is that really "doing well"? IDK, compared to my norm, yeah, it is. I guess at the end of the day, I appreciate this thread because it has helped me to take a serious look at my relationship with alcohol, it has made me realize that there are others who share the same struggles, and it has given me support and encouragement to keep trying to do better, whatever that may be.

    @WinoGelato - Welcome to the group. It sound like you are going to fit right in!
  • Polo265
    Polo265 Posts: 287 Member
    Moxie42 wrote: »
    It's hard for me to be active on MFP lately because my workplace moved my desk and my screen is now visible to the world. But I wanted to hop on this group today (and try to get back to being here daily) because I'm seriously considering going to AA (I've been going anyway by court order...yeahhh, I got a DUI last April) because apparently I simply cannot moderate, and promising myself I won't drink doesn't work either. I think I've just held off for so long because I'm embarrassed and ashamed to admit this to anyone, especially my husband. He has the best intentions but truly believes I just need more willpower. I know this group isn't for alcoholics specifically, but I'd love to connect with anyone who is in recovery. I see so many people here who can have just a drink or two, or only have some on weekends, even if they were heavy drinkers before. I don't know why I can't do it too but I've tried for years, only to keep ending up in the same bad place. Everyone's posts are so motivating though- so many great reasons to move forward with this. I'm so glad I found this group!

    Moxie: There is a recovery group online. www.soberrecovery.com There is a very active forum where you can post. I cannot moderate either. I am 3 weeks without alcohol.
  • slimbyjune18
    slimbyjune18 Posts: 101 Member
    Thank you all for your support, honesty and motivation. I set out at the start of Jan to drink less and only at the weekend. The reality has been apart from one Saturday completely dry. It’s aided my marathon training and I think I feel better. I will be continuing in February, completely dry in the week and then an occasional weekend drink. The run is mid-March and I can feel the benefit. Not had much difference on the scale, surprised given I’ve stuck to calories and exercised lots.
  • SanDiegofitmom
    SanDiegofitmom Posts: 303 Member
    slimbyjune18 wrote: »
    Thank you all for your support, honesty and motivation. I set out at the start of Jan to drink less and only at the weekend. The reality has been apart from one Saturday completely dry. It’s aided my marathon training and I think I feel better. I will be continuing in February, completely dry in the week and then an occasional weekend drink. The run is mid-March and I can feel the benefit. Not had much difference on the scale, surprised given I’ve stuck to calories and exercised lots.

    I know what you mean, but I am guessing your body is holding on to water weight given your training. I had the same thing- but then had to have a minor skin surgery that then got infected and I had to stop working out. Within two days I lost 3 pounds.
  • MaryBethHempel
    MaryBethHempel Posts: 513 Member
    dbanks80 wrote: »
    WinoGelato wrote: »
    I've been lurking here as well and have been really inspired and encouraged by everyone's stories and experiences.

    For my own personal accountability... I always say that I have 1-2 glasses of wine a few nights a week, but in actuality when I started taking a hard look at it, it was almost always 2-3 glasses and really pretty much every night. It wasn't holding me back in my weight management (I lost my weight and am now maintaining for a few years).
    I told myself it was because I'm a busy working mom and it was to help me relax - most nights I wait till after the kids were in bed when I feel like I'm off the clock from all my obligations and would pour a glass to unwind while checking in on MFP forums or to watch Netflix with hubby (who doesn't drink - gave it up a few years ago for a health issue exacerbated by alcohol). When socializing with friends or at work functions involving alcohol maybe once every couple weeks - I would just keep refilling the glass and often found myself at the bottom of a bottle - having a DD all the time probably influenced those decisions.

    After a couple of recent family cancer diagnoses and following a mid Jan social event where I was hung over and couldn't remember everything I had said the night before (making me worry that I had embarrassed myself), I decided to cut back and this thread has really helped. I wasn't intending to do dry Jan but to be more moderate when I do drink and also to have dry days rather than just automatically reaching for wine in the evenings.

    At the end of the month - here is how it turned out.

    More dry days than wine days (but not a landslide victory).

    On the dry days, like others, I relied heavily on hot tea and something sweet like a shortbread cookie. I've enjoyed trying new teas and definitely in these cold months have found that to be a really nice way to end my evening.

    A couple of small personal victories including:
    - on a recent work trip I had one glass at dinner, one glass alone in the bar waiting for a colleague who didn't show up - I didn't even want the second glass just felt weird sitting alone drinking water. When she didn't make it I went back to my room and had a hot tea and cookie just like at home!
    - Same work trip second night with a group dinner after a big presentation I did have a few glasses at the dinner and went to the bar with colleagues, but I had one glass and was the first to call it a night - usually I would be closing the bar down.
    - At a recent trivia night I did drink almost a full bottle of rose but had some offers to keep going, people continuing the party at another bar, and I turned them down and went home to bed. Normally would have kept on, gotten a ride home and felt horrible the next morning.
    - Last night work function - only one glass of wine during the social hour, none with dinner and was the first person to leave because I wanted to get home to see my family and have my tea.

    My biggest observation is how "present" wine is for me and how I would almost be bargaining with myself when I would be looking at the week and saying I wouldn't be drinking until Saturday or whatever. I would then stop to count how many days that was, and wonder how many drinks I would have, wonder if it would feel different, etc. One night I had a glass at home because it was an open bottle and I didn't want the wine to go to waste - hardly a good reason!

    Planning to continue trying to be more mindful and moderate in February.

    Cheers (in the greeting sense, not the drinking sense)!

    Welcome to the group!! Reading these threads really helps me to stay mindful as well in how much wine I consume.

    Welcome to our group! This thread has been a blessing for me and I hope it will be for you also! :)
  • MaryBethHempel
    MaryBethHempel Posts: 513 Member
    Goal — January under 7 drinks a week- for my health.....my mind.....my body....Freedom from alcohol ruling my life!

    1/1 =alcohol free
    1/2 = 4 wine spritzers
    1/3 =alcohol free
    1/4 =alcohol free
    1/5 =alcohol free while my husband must of drank almost 2 bottles of wine....I wasn't tempted, which was great!
    1/6 =alcohol free while my husband must of drank almost 2 bottles of wine
    1/7 =alcohol free while my husband must of drank almost 2 bottles of wine-I copy and paste! Rerun! :) I feel that now I don't even want one drink as it is never enough...I always want more! I will see how long I can be FREE from alcohol. Losing weight and feeling great!
    1/8 =DITTO...I slept better last night--had an Atkins bar around 8...maybe that was it...I also had to go to my guest room again for my husbands snoring started again! :)
    1/9 =DITTO and lost another pound---Wow! 7 days alcohol FREE!! This is the longest I have gone for years!
    1/10 =8 days freedom
    1/11 =9 days freedom- looking forward to reading my new books...This Naked Mind and Blackout-Remembering The Things I Drank to Forget...
    1/12 =10 days clean! My hubby only drank during the day, not last night. He didn't snore last night, so I didn't have to go to our guest room to sleep. Read the first 2 1/2 chapters of This Naked Mind and finding it interesting.
    1/13 =11 Days freedom! It is actually getting easier at this point...I just ordered some liver detox....
    1/14 =12 Days freedom! It really helps to have all you on MFP for support! Thank you all!! :)
    1/15 =13 days---Wow! I am finally sleeping in my own bed now because my husband cuts off his drinking at night and he doesn't snore so loud to make me go into our guest room! LOL! He didn't like me going into the guest room, so he cut down... :)
    1/16 =14 days freedom! 2 weeks!! YAY! I have to note how yesterday was a bit interesting when my hubby just bottle a bunch of wine and said to me, "Taste this, it is better than the usual Concord that we make". I told him immediately that I was just drinking green tea and it wouldn't taste good. I was so glad that I was drinking tea, as I would have been tempted to taste it. I feel that if it happens again that I am prepared now and will decline. I am going to tell him today not even to ask me to taste. :)

    1/17 =15th day freedom! Had another great morning of working out...ready to play some music!
    1/18 =16th day freedom! I am going for a month!! I joined the "Alcohol Experiment" Super informational...I have been just reading and listening..this weekend I am going to start writing in the journal. I recommend this to you all, if just to read and listen to all the interesting information.
    1/19 =17th day- my husband drank through the day until bedtime and I had to go to the guest room to sleep because he snored again. A definite pattern of loud snoring when he drinks wine at night. I caught up in the "Alcohol Experiment" yesterday and started writing in it. It really is helping me in so many ways. I feel blessed to have the opportunity to be able to go through it, and I highly recommend it. There is no pressure about your alcohol intake.
    1/20 =18th day of freedom from alcohol addiction. My mind and body are really loving it. Yesterday was my first social event to go to. I had no problem in saying that I wasn't having any wine, when asked twice. I said I was on a cleanse and I have to stay away from the sugar. My doctor did say that I have to stay away from sugar last year, as I have a hereditary condition called GSID-Genetic Sucrase-Isomaltase Deficiency. I have been following the diet fine, except for the alcohol, until now. I have even another reason to stay away from it.
    1/21 =19th freedom day
    1/22 =20th day...a tempting day in that I just don't feel up to doing much. Previously, this is when I drank. I am hanging in there.
    1/23 =21st day...did intermittent fasting and just love it! Started a Thread on Challenges!
    1/24 =22nd day of freedom. I went way past my goal of under 7 drinks a week. I have no cravings and am loving my life without alcohol.
    1/25 =23rd day of freedom! I finished This Naked Mind last night! Such a great book! I will continue to refer to it!
    1/26 =24th day...6 more days and I will hit the 30 mark! I was thinking about how it was so difficult to hold my drinking until 2 pm...I was drinking daily at noon...I feel so blessed now to be away from that addiction. Thank you God!!!! :)
    1/27 =25th day...I really don't feel liking drinking anymore. It just feels like it would wreck what I feel like I got in my life now from not drinking. I feel so much stronger, happier, healthier, and enjoying life so much more, as well as accomplishing so much more...I am so so thankful for this thread...It really has helped me to realize and accomplish a whole new way of life. :)
    1/28 =26th day freedom!
    1/29 =27th day freedom! I think I am going to save this log in my computer for future reference, as a reminder.
    1/30 =28th day of freedom done! I have been tearing apart our basement and getting so much done! I have much more mental and physical energy for projects since I stopped drinking.
    1/31 =
  • erikNJ
    erikNJ Posts: 1,009 Member
    MaryBethHempel wrote: »
    jclark14572 wrote: »
    I have also started doing this. Seems to be the only way for me to
    Lose weight now

    That is how I got started on this journey! I have lost 21 pounds since December 1st.

    That is great!!!
  • RubyRed427
    RubyRed427 Posts: 4,416 Member
    @DCRunnerGirl78 Great story because you set the tone and suspense, and I couldn't wait to see if you had that rum and coke!!
    What a triumph! When all is said and done, these successes add up. Builds strength and mental fitness. So happy for you!! Sober and clearheaded in the morning- like winning a lottery, I feel.
  • justlog
    justlog Posts: 125 Member
    Great job everyone! I close the month at 25 days without (all in a row) & 6 with. I'm going to shoot for a totally free dry Feb, but I'm not sure at this point how stringent I want to hold myself to that.
  • kittybenn
    kittybenn Posts: 444 Member
    @JuliaAL1969 and everybody else -- I agree, I could not have done it without this thread. I never felt alone. And now, it's the night of Jan. 31 and I can proudly say that the entire month was dry. I am so amazed that I've come this far. Maybe it was that epic New Year's Day hangover that inspired me to get headed in the right direction! See you guys over on the Feb. thread and really looking to keeping this going. I plan to never go back to daily wine drinking, with the help of all of you, of course. Planning on another dry day tomorrow, and then a glass or two with my celebratory dinner out Fri. night. I'm very curious to see how I'll react.
  • RubyRed427
    RubyRed427 Posts: 4,416 Member
    kittybenn wrote: »
    @JuliaAL1969 and everybody else -- I agree, I could not have done it without this thread. I never felt alone. And now, it's the night of Jan. 31 and I can proudly say that the entire month was dry. I am so amazed that I've come this far. Maybe it was that epic New Year's Day hangover that inspired me to get headed in the right direction! See you guys over on the Feb. thread and really looking to keeping this going. I plan to never go back to daily wine drinking, with the help of all of you, of course. Planning on another dry day tomorrow, and then a glass or two with my celebratory dinner out Fri. night. I'm very curious to see how I'll react.

    Bravo Kitty!! Yes, see how you'll react on Friday. Annie Grace or another author says that you will feel it right away and maybe one or two drinks will be enough for the buzz. Let us know:)
    I giggled when you said epic hangover. My last epic hangover was Dec. 1, 2017. That is burned in my brain:) LOL
  • RubyRed427
    RubyRed427 Posts: 4,416 Member
    Alzzi76 wrote: »
    Well done everyone!!! Youve all have done an awesome job o:)o:)B)B)<3<3

    I completed 23 days of Jan with 2 slips :/

    Im thinking to make mini goals for myself of 23 days withoutany slips ... ;):p than i only have 6 more days to hang on to it til the end of the mth.

    23 days is awesome!! What an accomplishment indeed:)

    @justlog 25 days is nearly four weeks. I bet your body and mind feel great! I'm sure you will make February just fine!
  • dbanks80
    dbanks80 Posts: 3,685 Member
    DCRunnerGirl78 wrote: »
    Personal victory for last night!

    I was having one of those days...all day long. My husband was behind schedule, frustrated, and taking it out on me. I got an email from two of my son's (16) teachers telling me once again, "he's brilliant, but not pushing himself." No homework and incomplete classwork will result in two C's on his forth coming report card. My daughter (13) kept texting me all day because she was bored...testing day, she was done so they could have their phones. When she got home she explained that she thought she was brightening my day, but I was busy (work from home), so really it was just adding fuel to the fire.

    By the time my husband left to make deliveries, I was ready to fix a rum and Coke. I managed to talk myself into a hot cocoa, and that worked well. Too well. I got sidetracked looking at Facebook while I drank it, and ended up starting dinner an hour late...with two hungry teens in the house. My plan was for homemade chicken and dumplings, but of course, I'd forgotten to thaw the chicken. No worries, my husband gave me a pressure cooker for Christmas, I got this! I got the veggies all cleaned and chopped, the spices all measured out and added, tossed in the chicken, set the timer, then started cleaning up. Not until about 10 minutes later did it occur to me that the pot hadn't started yet. I figured in the rush I hadn't sealed the lid correctly, so I opened it up, checked everything (seemed fine), and tried again. Waited about 5 more minuets, it still didn't sound right. Opened it up, checked it again, still looked alright, so headed to the internet to see what I could possibly be doing wrong. I hadn't realized, the meat being frozen, it would take longer to build pressure. So if I hadn't kept messing with, it would probably have been about done at that point. I left it alone, the pressure finally started to build, so I got on to the dumplings. I was rushing now, didn't read the directions carefully enough, and added the milk before I got the butter cut into the flour. My hands were covered in sticky dough, and I had to call my daughter down to keep sprinkling flour over the mess until I could get it scraped off of me. Once we got those leveled out, the soup part was done...my son was so hungry he actually emerged from his room unbidden...the dumplings only took about 5 minutes to cook, and I had made a healthy dinner that we all seemed to enjoy.

    I was thinking hard about the rum and Coke again by the time we all got our chores done, but I was able to distract myself with the Downton Abbey tea the kids gave me for Christmas and a few cookies from my secret stash. After that I figured I'd call it an early night and get ready for bed. As soon as I was done, hubby gets home...with groceries. Don't get me wrong, I'm happy he went shopping, but putting away groceries at 9pm was not what I had planned for the rest of the night. We get that done, but I didn't want to go to bed anymore. I wanted the rum and Coke that had been looming the back of my mind all evening. I gave in. I was heading to the kitchen to fix it when it hit me that I knew one would easily turn to two, which would probably turn to three before it was all said and done, so, begrudgingly, I fixed another cup of tea. After that, I really did head to bed...SOBER. And woke this morning...with NO HANGOVER!

    I'm sure this just seems like the ramblings of any wife and mother to some, but maybe someone else can relate and take something from it. Hopefully it will help if ever another of you finds yourself in a similar situation...or just wants to know that yes, we all have the same mundane struggles.

    I enjoyed reading this!! You almost got me when you said you went to make the rum and coke LOL!
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