Less alcohol- January 2018- one day at a time

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  • kittybenn
    kittybenn Posts: 444 Member
    Last night I woke up and was thinking about wine and how it doesn’t even sound good anymore. Crazy!
    Have been having the same thoughts. You are doing so great! Congrats!
  • RubyRed427
    RubyRed427 Posts: 4,155 Member
    kittybenn wrote: »
    @JulieAL1969 - I was wondering about you and so happy you let us know how great you're doing. Many congrats! Way to be tough! Day 26 begins. I can't even believe I'm writing that and that I've made it this far. SO inspired by all the success I'm reading about here!

    Bravo!! @kittybenn - you are doing awesome! Day 26 is going to be another dry one for us. Been in and out of bars all day in Nashville. On Day 2 (today ) on this girls' trip, I asked bartender to make me a delicious mocktail. He made me a tequila sunrise without the tequila; let's say that drink needs tequila to be drinkable. Waste of calories! So, back to club soda. Some of us have 5 more days to go for a successful Dry January; I know I didn't think I was capable of going that long without.

    I also congratulate the many who have been slowly cutting back, or setting some goals and following through with moderation, limiting the alcohol to certain days or amounts, and just following this thread and commenting, etc. We are all doing well and doing the best we can. Be kind to yourself if sometimes you stumble.

    Here's a great 10 minutes video describing some addiction book that a knowledgeable young lady reviews. Some of us have read a few of the books she mentioned. I got some ideas for others books to add to my list.
    https://youtu.be/cM1BVDQlZjw
  • RubyRed427
    RubyRed427 Posts: 4,155 Member
    JenT304 wrote: »
    To those wondering about the author of Drinking: A love story, Caroline Knapp, sadly, she died at age 42 from lung cancer. She was a wonderful writer. She also wrote a book called, Pack of Two, which details how after she got sober, she adopted a dog and it is a sweet story about the relationship and love between a dog and their human.

    Oh my that is so sad!!! Thanks for looking it up. I was wondering. She really moved me in her book.

  • RubyRed427
    RubyRed427 Posts: 4,155 Member
    JenT304 wrote: »
    To those wondering about the author of Drinking: A love story, Caroline Knapp, sadly, she died at age 42 from lung cancer. She was a wonderful writer. She also wrote a book called, Pack of Two, which details how after she got sober, she adopted a dog and it is a sweet story about the relationship and love between a dog and their human.


    Yeah finding out she died several years after getting sober (from smoking/lung cancer) made me wonder how realistic sobriety is for people with certain mental/enotional/addiction issues. She went from anorexia, to alcohol, smoking... i too was anorexic, then a smoker (i quit in my late 20's), then alcohol and sex became problematic. Now its really JUST alcohol and its not causing other problems except my knowledge that in the long term my body will be negatively impacted. Etc
    I am currently doing some counseling with my husband (we do this periodically) and my thetapist kind of suggested it may be a legitimate way i cope with some of my mental darkness. Even from a young age i would count the number of starving children who died each day, or feel guilty for being alive while othets suffered in war zones or through horrific abuse. Even today a simple tragic news story can send me into an existential crisis and endless philisophical analysis that usually ends in "f-it, there is no god who will save all the dying children, and i am powerless too.... i guess i will have a drink to turn the volume of those thoughts down."

    I guess i see alcohol as no different tgsn someone who might take any form of medicine to help with mental issues. Ideally id like to not be one of those people but at a certian point we have to be realistic.
    Anyway, i still found her book to be provocative and even profound. But i cant help but wonder what she might have written 10 years later ( had she lived longer).

    Did she really find the mental/emotional root of her addiction and remove it, or would it just sprout something new in a later season of life?

    You are an empath. Someone who feels so deeply others' pains. I would guess many of us on the thread feel this way at times. This deep compassion or empathy for those in need, hurt, abused or harmed. You are a beautiful soul. I can see that you are a deep thinker; perhaps, the alcohol takes you to a happier place for awhile where you dont have to feel so deeply. Xoxo
  • NormInv
    NormInv Posts: 3,285 Member
    islandbeez wrote: »
    NormInv wrote: »
    Day 25 - check....wow I am amazed at not having had a drink for this long. Good job self!

    Great job, @NormInv ! And thanks for the morning chuckle!

    Thank you :)))
  • RubyRed427
    RubyRed427 Posts: 4,155 Member
    Moxie42 wrote: »
    It's hard for me to be active on MFP lately because my workplace moved my desk and my screen is now visible to the world. But I wanted to hop on this group today (and try to get back to being here daily) because I'm seriously considering going to AA (I've been going anyway by court order...yeahhh, I got a DUI last April) because apparently I simply cannot moderate, and promising myself I won't drink doesn't work either. I think I've just held off for so long because I'm embarrassed and ashamed to admit this to anyone, especially my husband. He has the best intentions but truly believes I just need more willpower. I know this group isn't for alcoholics specifically, but I'd love to connect with anyone who is in recovery. I see so many people here who can have just a drink or two, or only have some on weekends, even if they were heavy drinkers before. I don't know why I can't do it too but I've tried for years, only to keep ending up in the same bad place. Everyone's posts are so motivating though- so many great reasons to move forward with this. I'm so glad I found this group!

    You're not the only one. I'm in the same place. I cannot moderate. I guess 50 percent of the population drinks. But only 2 percent cannot moderate and drink too much. Lucky us - we must be in the 2 percent. Wishing you a big hug. You're not alone.
  • erikNJ
    erikNJ Posts: 1,009 Member
    @Moxie42 everyone’s battle and journey is going to be different. Good to see you are being honest with yourself!

    @JulieAL1969 so great to read about your vacation and your strength!
  • Alzzi76
    Alzzi76 Posts: 504 Member
    islandbeez wrote: »
    @Moxie42 I do not believe I will ever. EVER. be able to moderate. I am still coming to terms with this reality and I don't really love it, but I have to accept it. My husband got a DUI exactly 2 years ago. He was a very severe alcoholic, though because he was so high functioning and sweet he was able to fool many. He blew a .42 and then a .44 and was capable of walking, talking, and sadly, driving. The entire police department kept going to his cell because they had never seen anyone so coherent with such a high BAC. He didn't have to do AA but he had probation for a year with random alcohol screens and that scared him sober. It's a very scary thing having seen what he went through and I don't want to go there myself. If AA helps and you are comfortable there you really need to go and don't be embarrassed. Another DUI is embarrassing, losing your job is embarrassing, but admitting you need help is STRONG! I know it's tough, I have watched it and am now also going through it. I know we all keep mentioning it, but The Naked Mind has changed my views so much, there is no way I was going to be able to change without it...at least it was going to take more to convince me than the fact that alcohol cost me my job. If I had found it a month earlier my story would be much different right now.


    Lots of hugs to u... I have similar situation. I never used to drink when i was at home. But it seems i got into a life style with company and i have into my inner feelings trusted people i shouldn't have . I now want to take control of my life. Look after what i have left.
  • Alzzi76
    Alzzi76 Posts: 504 Member
    I appreciate the honesty of people on this board. I think this month has truly been an eye opening time. I know for a long time I’ve been in denial. I eat very healthy and always have stayed fairly thin and worked out - but I didn’t see daily drinking as unhealthy. This month and reading the Naked Mind and other books has forced me to face the fact that if I truly want to be the “healthy” person I want to be, alcohol and wine have to be a small piece of the picture. I would never eat two big pieces of chocolate cake every night or a big fried dinner, but alcohol has been ok even though it causes cancer, it’s a toxin and depressant. It’s a weird thing. All that said, I do love a glass of wine. However, I don’t ever want to go back to daily drinking ever again. Not even every other day. I plan to stay on this board indefinitely! :)

    yep.. i found that too. It was like alcohol was a substitute for cakes and sweets etc.
  • MaryBethHempel
    MaryBethHempel Posts: 513 Member
    JenT304 wrote: »
    To those wondering about the author of Drinking: A love story, Caroline Knapp, sadly, she died at age 42 from lung cancer. She was a wonderful writer. She also wrote a book called, Pack of Two, which details how after she got sober, she adopted a dog and it is a sweet story about the relationship and love between a dog and their human.


    Oh dear, she was so young. I am glad she was able to enjoy part of her life being sober. I will have to read her books. Thanks for the info.
  • MaryBethHempel
    MaryBethHempel Posts: 513 Member
    Yesterday I did a 30 minute strength training work out in the morning before work. When I got home I told my husband I wanted to go for a run and he laughed and joked about me being addicted to my new home gym. I told him that I just didn't have time in the morning to do both cardio and strength training and I really wanted to make up for it. He asked me what I did before I quit the gym last month, I said that I just dealt with short work outs. Then I thought about it a realized that I would come home and drink and just do nothing. This goes back to my original posts about having "too much energy" when sober. I'm definitely finding more healthy ways to help with that extra energy and am loving it!!

    Awesome! I feel the same way and it is so wonderful. I am looking forward to some bike riding soon. It is to just enjoy life! :)