The Face Problem
Replies
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saraonly9913 wrote: »Ok. So, I lost a lot of weight but have not reached my goal yet. At least 4 people have commented on my face recently. Basically telling me I'm getting too thin and that my face no longer looks good........ Believe me, it seems as if overnight my face has aged 10 years. It has shocked me. I imagine I'm looking at a facelift if I can ever afford it. I'm 49.
Has anyone experienced this? How have you handled it? How has it affected your self esteem? Have you made peace with your face as it is?
Thanks.
I had to trade 'good looks' for good health, the only difference is, young girls are opening doors for me, not sure if this is because of political correctness or that I look quite old and feeble now
. How do I handle it ? officially am offended but privately am glad there is not so many videos of me pushing on doors marked 'pull' appearing on youtube ;-)
I say we go with you are a fine looking man who doesn't realize it! Haha on pushing on pull doors. I do that too sometimes!2 -
saraonly9913 wrote: »saraonly9913 wrote: »Ok. So, I lost a lot of weight but have not reached my goal yet. At least 4 people have commented on my face recently. Basically telling me I'm getting too thin and that my face no longer looks good........ Believe me, it seems as if overnight my face has aged 10 years. It has shocked me. I imagine I'm looking at a facelift if I can ever afford it. I'm 49.
Has anyone experienced this? How have you handled it? How has it affected your self esteem? Have you made peace with your face as it is?
Thanks.
I had to trade 'good looks' for good health, the only difference is, young girls are opening doors for me, not sure if this is because of political correctness or that I look quite old and feeble now. How do I handle it ? officially am offended but privately am glad there is not so many videos of me pushing on doors marked 'pull' appearing on youtube ;-)
I say we go with you are a fine looking man who doesn't realize it! Haha on pushing on pull doors. I do that too sometimes!
By the way, I hold doors for anyone and everyone!4 -
saraonly9913 wrote: »Ok. So, I lost a lot of weight but have not reached my goal yet. At least 4 people have commented on my face recently. Basically telling me I'm getting too thin and that my face no longer looks good........ Believe me, it seems as if overnight my face has aged 10 years. It has shocked me. I imagine I'm looking at a facelift if I can ever afford it. I'm 49.
Has anyone experienced this? How have you handled it? How has it affected your self esteem? Have you made peace with your face as it is?
Thanks.saraonly9913 wrote: »Ok. So, I lost a lot of weight but have not reached my goal yet. At least 4 people have commented on my face recently. Basically telling me I'm getting too thin and that my face no longer looks good........ Believe me, it seems as if overnight my face has aged 10 years. It has shocked me. I imagine I'm looking at a facelift if I can ever afford it. I'm 49.
Has anyone experienced this? How have you handled it? How has it affected your self esteem? Have you made peace with your face as it is?
Thanks.
Maybe i'll tell the next person who says something something along of the lines of, " Yes, I know! Won't you please donate to my plastic surgery Go Fund Me Page" or just plain "plastic surgery fund" !7 -
Congratulations first and foremost on the amazing weight accomplishment! People are weird. We want to support others. But secretly we’re jealous. We’re constantly comparing. We hope they succeed. But not become better than us. We operate in this constant state of silently monitoring everyone around us, and in some cases, not so silently. All of the commotion of right now will pass. Everyone will get used to the new normal, they will pipe down with the commentary, and everyone will move on.
I’ve thought a lot about a lower face lift once I’m down to my goal weight, and am setting aside the $5,000 it will cost if I do it. I’m 48, so it feels too young to be thinking about it but my face sags a bit even now. If I bust my behind, I could reach my goal this summer then see how my face looks then.
Congrats again, and just keep doing you.
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Congratulations first and foremost on the amazing weight accomplishment! People are weird. We want to support others. But secretly we’re jealous. We’re constantly comparing. We hope they succeed. But not become better than us. We operate in this constant state of silently monitoring everyone around us, and in some cases, not so silently. All of the commotion of right now will pass. Everyone will get used to the new normal, they will pipe down with the commentary, and everyone will move on.
I’ve thought a lot about a lower face lift once I’m down to my goal weight, and am setting aside the $5,000 it will cost if I do it. I’m 48, so it feels too young to be thinking about it but my face sags a bit even now. If I bust my behind, I could reach my goal this summer then see how my face looks then.
Congrats again, and just keep doing you.
Thank you so much.
Best to you !1 -
saraonly9913 wrote: »Congratulations first and foremost on the amazing weight accomplishment! People are weird. We want to support others. But secretly we’re jealous. We’re constantly comparing. We hope they succeed. But not become better than us. We operate in this constant state of silently monitoring everyone around us, and in some cases, not so silently. All of the commotion of right now will pass. Everyone will get used to the new normal, they will pipe down with the commentary, and everyone will move on.
I’ve thought a lot about a lower face lift once I’m down to my goal weight, and am setting aside the $5,000 it will cost if I do it. I’m 48, so it feels too young to be thinking about it but my face sags a bit even now. If I bust my behind, I could reach my goal this summer then see how my face looks then.
Congrats again, and just keep doing you.
Thank you so much.
Best to you !
I'm 65, have lost around 50lbs and aim to lose about another 25lb. My skin is sagging but I didn't know you could get a lower face lift. I would rather deal with that problem than the extra weight. Is a lower face lift just your jaw line?
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Oops copied the wrong quote. I was responding to @RedBull460
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If it's any help, at all... I had a pretty impressive neck wattle when I first lost the weight off my face... two years later, it's shrunk down to a "normal" size neck wattle for a 53 year old chick. My wrinkles have lightened up, too. Just keep on doing what you are doing for your health, and ignore the unsolicited comments.
Hugs!12 -
OP, your old friends are used to you being overweight. So,it is shocking to them to see you different.
I suggest you spend some time looking at the before and after face thread on here. They all look incredible, no matter the age..they look younger and more attractive thinner..BY FAR. your 'rude' friends...(and they are) want to keep you looking somewhat the same so you don't rock their little rude world. Don't let them derail you...their little brains will get used to the new fit fabulous you in due time. 8 -
saraonly9913 wrote: »saraonly9913 wrote: »Ok. So, I lost a lot of weight but have not reached my goal yet. At least 4 people have commented on my face recently. Basically telling me I'm getting too thin and that my face no longer looks good........ Believe me, it seems as if overnight my face has aged 10 years. It has shocked me. I imagine I'm looking at a facelift if I can ever afford it. I'm 49.
Has anyone experienced this? How have you handled it? How has it affected your self esteem? Have you made peace with your face as it is?
Thanks.saraonly9913 wrote: »Ok. So, I lost a lot of weight but have not reached my goal yet. At least 4 people have commented on my face recently. Basically telling me I'm getting too thin and that my face no longer looks good........ Believe me, it seems as if overnight my face has aged 10 years. It has shocked me. I imagine I'm looking at a facelift if I can ever afford it. I'm 49.
Has anyone experienced this? How have you handled it? How has it affected your self esteem? Have you made peace with your face as it is?
Thanks.
Maybe i'll tell the next person who says something something along of the lines of, " Yes, I know! Won't you please donate to my plastic surgery Go Fund Me Page" or just plain "plastic surgery fund" !
Try “enough about ME. Let’s talk about YOU for awhile.” Most of the time, shifting to the other person after they’ve overstepped is a great tactic. Ex:
Them: wow you look awful
You: having a bad day? I’m sorry. What can I do to help?
Them: no, I mean your face is so much older now that you’re skinny
You: it’s not like you to be insulting. What’s bothering you?
I kind of enjoy that game and it’s sure better than letting comments get to me (they do, but I hate to show it).
Your skin probably will settle into your new weight. Be proud.15 -
saraonly9913 wrote: »saraonly9913 wrote: »Ok. So, I lost a lot of weight but have not reached my goal yet. At least 4 people have commented on my face recently. Basically telling me I'm getting too thin and that my face no longer looks good........ Believe me, it seems as if overnight my face has aged 10 years. It has shocked me. I imagine I'm looking at a facelift if I can ever afford it. I'm 49.
Has anyone experienced this? How have you handled it? How has it affected your self esteem? Have you made peace with your face as it is?
Thanks.saraonly9913 wrote: »Ok. So, I lost a lot of weight but have not reached my goal yet. At least 4 people have commented on my face recently. Basically telling me I'm getting too thin and that my face no longer looks good........ Believe me, it seems as if overnight my face has aged 10 years. It has shocked me. I imagine I'm looking at a facelift if I can ever afford it. I'm 49.
Has anyone experienced this? How have you handled it? How has it affected your self esteem? Have you made peace with your face as it is?
Thanks.
Maybe i'll tell the next person who says something something along of the lines of, " Yes, I know! Won't you please donate to my plastic surgery Go Fund Me Page" or just plain "plastic surgery fund" !
Try “enough about ME. Let’s talk about YOU for awhile.” Most of the time, shifting to the other person after they’ve overstepped is a great tactic. Ex:
Them: wow you look awful
You: having a bad day? I’m sorry. What can I do to help?
Them: no, I mean your face is so much older now that you’re skinny
You: it’s not like you to be insulting. What’s bothering you?
I kind of enjoy that game and it’s sure better than letting comments get to me (they do, but I hate to show it).
Your skin probably will settle into your new weight. Be proud.
I do this and it's amazingly effective in a lot of situations 4 -
saraonly9913 wrote: »saraonly9913 wrote: »Ok. So, I lost a lot of weight but have not reached my goal yet. At least 4 people have commented on my face recently. Basically telling me I'm getting too thin and that my face no longer looks good........ Believe me, it seems as if overnight my face has aged 10 years. It has shocked me. I imagine I'm looking at a facelift if I can ever afford it. I'm 49.
Has anyone experienced this? How have you handled it? How has it affected your self esteem? Have you made peace with your face as it is?
Thanks.saraonly9913 wrote: »Ok. So, I lost a lot of weight but have not reached my goal yet. At least 4 people have commented on my face recently. Basically telling me I'm getting too thin and that my face no longer looks good........ Believe me, it seems as if overnight my face has aged 10 years. It has shocked me. I imagine I'm looking at a facelift if I can ever afford it. I'm 49.
Has anyone experienced this? How have you handled it? How has it affected your self esteem? Have you made peace with your face as it is?
Thanks.
Maybe i'll tell the next person who says something something along of the lines of, " Yes, I know! Won't you please donate to my plastic surgery Go Fund Me Page" or just plain "plastic surgery fund" !
Try “enough about ME. Let’s talk about YOU for awhile.” Most of the time, shifting to the other person after they’ve overstepped is a great tactic. Ex:
Them: wow you look awful
You: having a bad day? I’m sorry. What can I do to help?
Them: no, I mean your face is so much older now that you’re skinny
You: it’s not like you to be insulting. What’s bothering you?
I kind of enjoy that game and it’s sure better than letting comments get to me (they do, but I hate to show it).
Your skin probably will settle into your new weight. Be proud.
I do this and it's amazingly effective in a lot of situations
Agree! I started doing it when I worked with a woman who greeted me every morning with a comment about how I needed to fix my makeup (“omg girl! Put on some LIPSTICK!” etc) because I looked “tired.” I had a newborn. (She never had kids.) Yes I was tired. Exhausted, really. I started saying “oh, your work is overwhelming you today? You can vent to me anytime.” Lol.3 -
Good thread !!!2
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I went through this too. People *will* comment, whether you want them to or not, LOL! And no, you don't have to pretend that it's okay for someone to make comments about your appearance. You can tell them you don't appreciate it when they point out something about someone else's appearance without being asked to. Anyway, for me, at first, it was really disheartening to hear that even though I was so much healthier, I had wrinkles that were much more noticeable. Then, one day, I pulled up an old photo from my heavier days and REALLY looked at it. I saw how puffy my face looked, with noticeable swelling under the eyes, and how sallow the skin was. Then I looked at a recent photo and saw the puffiness and swelling were gone, and while yes, there were more wrinkles, my skin was also brighter, clearer, and had a youthful glow. Also, over time, the facial sagging perked up a bit, which helped.11
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Sounds like people you don't need in your life, OP. Anyone who feels the need to comment in this way is not being helpful, just plain rude and unnecessary. If a facelift makes you happy, go for it, but don't take to heart what a few thoughtless humans tell you.2
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If it's any help, at all... I had a pretty impressive neck wattle when I first lost the weight off my face... two years later, it's shrunk down to a "normal" size neck wattle for a 53 year old chick. My wrinkles have lightened up, too. Just keep on doing what you are doing for your health, and ignore the unsolicited comments.
Hugs!
I'm in my late 40's. Thanks for the future hope!2 -
elisa123gal wrote: »OP, your old friends are used to you being overweight. So,it is shocking to them to see you different.
I suggest you spend some time looking at the before and after face thread on here. They all look incredible, no matter the age..they look younger and more attractive thinner..BY FAR. your 'rude' friends...(and they are) want to keep you looking somewhat the same so you don't rock their little rude world. Don't let them derail you...their little brains will get used to the new fit fabulous you in due time.
Thank you.0 -
elisa123gal wrote: »OP, your old friends are used to you being overweight. So,it is shocking to them to see you different.
I suggest you spend some time looking at the before and after face thread on here. They all look incredible, no matter the age..they look younger and more attractive thinner..BY FAR. your 'rude' friends...(and they are) want to keep you looking somewhat the same so you don't rock their little rude world. Don't let them derail you...their little brains will get used to the new fit fabulous you in due time.
I will look up that thread. Thank you!0 -
saraonly9913 wrote: »saraonly9913 wrote: »Ok. So, I lost a lot of weight but have not reached my goal yet. At least 4 people have commented on my face recently. Basically telling me I'm getting too thin and that my face no longer looks good........ Believe me, it seems as if overnight my face has aged 10 years. It has shocked me. I imagine I'm looking at a facelift if I can ever afford it. I'm 49.
Has anyone experienced this? How have you handled it? How has it affected your self esteem? Have you made peace with your face as it is?
Thanks.saraonly9913 wrote: »Ok. So, I lost a lot of weight but have not reached my goal yet. At least 4 people have commented on my face recently. Basically telling me I'm getting too thin and that my face no longer looks good........ Believe me, it seems as if overnight my face has aged 10 years. It has shocked me. I imagine I'm looking at a facelift if I can ever afford it. I'm 49.
Has anyone experienced this? How have you handled it? How has it affected your self esteem? Have you made peace with your face as it is?
Thanks.
Maybe i'll tell the next person who says something something along of the lines of, " Yes, I know! Won't you please donate to my plastic surgery Go Fund Me Page" or just plain "plastic surgery fund" !
Try “enough about ME. Let’s talk about YOU for awhile.” Most of the time, shifting to the other person after they’ve overstepped is a great tactic. Ex:
Them: wow you look awful
You: having a bad day? I’m sorry. What can I do to help?
Them: no, I mean your face is so much older now that you’re skinny
You: it’s not like you to be insulting. What’s bothering you?
I kind of enjoy that game and it’s sure better than letting comments get to me (they do, but I hate to show it).
Your skin probably will settle into your new weight. Be proud.
Very interesting way to look at this. Thanks.2
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