Less Alcohol- June 2018- One Day at a Time

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  • RubyRed427
    RubyRed427 Posts: 4,416 Member
    merickson1013 wrote: »
    Hi Everyone,
    My name is Megan and I have been up and down on my weight loss journey for the past 5-6 years (I am currently 28). I am 5'8" and was down to about 170 at my lowest and felt great-- I wouldn't mind sticking with that as an overall goal. I got up to 270.4 at my highest :disappointed:. I started a 6 week challenge with awesome coaches, a provided nutrition plan, and fantastic workouts. In the first two weeks, I have lost 10.4 pounds so far. However, I am still really struggling with the drinking. I know that I will be feeling better and have much more success with the weight loss if I go AF, but my job is extremely stressful and unpredictable and I definitely use drinking as an outlet. I am obviously not supposed to be drinking as part of my nutrition plan, but I still find myself drinking 3-4 times per week. I know I missed out on June, but I really want to commit to an AF July. Just need some support on how to do it!

    Hi Megan, We are here to help. We aren't experts just supportive people who want to have less alcohol in our systems, too. Anyway, very soon, the July link will be posted. And you will find a slew of places to go for support - @NovusDies has put together most of the resources we've been using to try to reduce/quit.
    The first thing that popped up in my mind is for you to go to Annie Grace's site "This naked mind" author. She has a free one month program you may want to join. Then, you can view her videos each day- that will be a start for you.
    Alcohol is sugar. It impacts our diet negatively. So, no matter how well you eat, it seems to cancel that out and you get a fat middle:)
  • NovusDies
    NovusDies Posts: 8,940 Member
    JulieAL1969 wrote: »
    Good blog about going to holiday parties.
    https://thesoberschool.com/survive-boozy-bbq/

    I remember back in January, I told my daughter that I realized I can still have fun at parties without drinking. She said "Duh, of course you can." She's 17 years old. I know my brain chemistry has really changed since I was a teen. Alcohol has made a serious imprint in my chemistry. It will take some work to get it back to basics.
    I wonder why I can have self control in some situations like I would NEVER drink before work or before driving my kids somewhere; there's no struggling there with my decision. I just wouldn't drink.
    It's a fascinating journey, that's for sure. I am optimistic however.

    That is one of the reasons I was so fascinated by the link you posted:

    https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/the-athletes-way/201505/the-neuroscience-making-decision

    Which summarized to this:
    Mindful decision-making can derail compulsive or addictive patterns of behavior and take you down a path that's in your best interest for long-term health, happiness, and overall well-being.

    This is what started me thinking about making my drinking decisions earlier than I realized. Whether instinctively or not you made the decision to be a responsible parent and educator. With that came a rule about drinking. That rule was and will always will be non-negotiable. You don't make that decision each day because it is never a question.

    I don't know if you remember what happened in early May but I intended 1) to go all of May without hard liquor and 2) to skip drinking completely on my normal allowance day of May 6th. I failed both and in record time. At first I was so defeated but if you remember I perked up a few days later when I started thinking about myself then (and now) compared to last year. It was then I started realizing that I was lying to myself. Am I really weak sometimes and strong others or was it a lie? How can I have rules about drinking and actually have had rules about drinking even when I was doing it daily and not have some measure of control? So then the question is how much control do I have and that answer has been surprising me lately.
  • NovusDies
    NovusDies Posts: 8,940 Member
    @Ke22yB Thanks for sharing your story. It is very inspiring.

    I have a couple of questions if you don't mind:

    When you went cold turkey did you know you were doing it at that time or did it start out as a daily decision that just kept going?

    How long did it take you to get from the desire to drink to thinking it was an abnormal thing to do?


  • RubyRed427
    RubyRed427 Posts: 4,416 Member
    @Ke22yB Thank you for sharing your story. I learn so much from others and I'll reread your posts a few times to let it digest. I dont think I've ever heard of anyone who says "I regret that I quit drinking." Which makes me think it's like a precious gift you give to yourself and family - not to depend on a toxic substance in good times and bad, and you feel terrific when you wake up each morning . Your family must have also benefitted in many ways. Please continue to post when you feel like it. You have an inspiring story. Xo
  • RubyRed427
    RubyRed427 Posts: 4,416 Member
    edited June 2018
    @NovusDies You make some good points. Xo

    Quote below is from the psychology today blog; this seems like what you've been doing successfully this last few months.

    The next time that you need to make a decision, take a few deep breaths and think about the the pros and cons of your next move in a pragmatic and mindful way. Then, do the right thing for your well-being.

    Using mindfulness could give various regions of your striatum and prefrontal cortex time to relay the true "neuroeconomic" costs of a decision and help you make smarter choices. Mindful decision-making can derail compulsive or addictive patterns of behavior and take you down a path that's in your best interest for long-term health, happiness, and overall well-being.

    And clearly this can also help with our eating habits and fitness goals.
  • Famof72015
    Famof72015 Posts: 393 Member
    donimfp wrote: »
    I want to share something that has occurred for me the last 2 days. This is not advice, just an observation about myself. I realize it might sound Loony Tunes to some people. This came after I read "Kick the Drink," which I'm re-reading slowly now. I intentionally had some alcohol on Tuesday because the author advised continuing your usual pattern until completely finishing the book (I'm so obliging!). I did finish the book Tuesday. Yesterday and today, I have had no alcohol, and the weird thing is that I haven't wanted any. That's a shift for me. What has caused this, I think, is a concept in that book. I found myself both days thinking, "I'm so glad I don't have to drink." Usually I think, "I'm so glad I'm managing not to drink today. I hope I can do it again tomorrow." The metaphor of being released from prison really resonated with me. Who gets out of prison and thinks, "I'm so glad I haven't returned to that prison today. I hope I can avoid going back in tomorrow"? Instead, it's, "I'm so glad I don't have to go back there any more."

    I think this helps me because it has gotten to the point where drinking feels like a prison to me, not like a treat and certainly not like a joy. Usually, I think, "Whew, Day 1 is over. Here's to Day 2." Today, I had lunch with a friend and she said, "You deserve a drink since your job fell through" (Note: I haven't shared that my job that hadn't started yet is now not happening--so I'm job-hunting again). Instead of being tempted, I thought, "Whew, I'm glad I don't have to go back there again," and I ordered a delicious hibiscus tea.

    Again, this may sound goofy to everybody else, but it's really making me feel good. I don't think of this as "Day 2 and counting." I just feel good not to feel hungover, stressed, conflicted, nauseated, and deprived (of that poison that makes me so unhappy).

    @Ke22yB, welcome, and thank you for sharing your story. Very inspiring. I'm 62, so older than most here. It's pretty exciting to think that in 10 years I can feel great with a decade of AF, healthy living behind me.



    I really like that.... I don’t have to drink. Way to go! Be proud of yourself
  • NovusDies
    NovusDies Posts: 8,940 Member
    @donimfp That sucks about your job falling through. I hope you find something else soon that you love.

    I haven't actually shared the details of my story over the last 50ish days because it sounds a bit ridiculous and unbelievable. I have to ask if the book you read offer any explanation for how you can lose the thirst like that?
  • NormInv
    NormInv Posts: 3,303 Member
    merickson1013 wrote: »
    Hi Everyone,
    My name is Megan and I have been up and down on my weight loss journey for the past 5-6 years (I am currently 28). I am 5'8" and was down to about 170 at my lowest and felt great-- I wouldn't mind sticking with that as an overall goal. I got up to 270.4 at my highest :disappointed:. I started a 6 week challenge with awesome coaches, a provided nutrition plan, and fantastic workouts. In the first two weeks, I have lost 10.4 pounds so far. However, I am still really struggling with the drinking. I know that I will be feeling better and have much more success with the weight loss if I go AF, but my job is extremely stressful and unpredictable and I definitely use drinking as an outlet. I am obviously not supposed to be drinking as part of my nutrition plan, but I still find myself drinking 3-4 times per week. I know I missed out on June, but I really want to commit to an AF July. Just need some support on how to do it!

    Welcome to the club
  • NovusDies
    NovusDies Posts: 8,940 Member
    @donimfp I wasn't really looking for a summary but more of a yes or no. Since I am not actually looking to quit completely I haven't really felt the need to read a book like that but I might if it can shed light on my question.
  • lorrainequiche59
    lorrainequiche59 Posts: 900 Member
    Hi Megan & Ken...Welcome & Welcome!!! Long weekend starts tomorrow for those of us in Canada. Hoping whoever this applies to has a good weekend with no regrets!

    Sounds like everyone is doing well & thank you for all the tidbits of info...it is all very helpful. We have a really good group here...

    I've been doing some work on mindfulness through a meditation CD a former therapist gave me. I've been consistently meditating for a couple of weeks now & realize that time will tell how it benefits me. I think the key is consistency. Does anyone have any personal experience to relate showing the benefits of mindfulness training?
  • lorrainequiche59
    lorrainequiche59 Posts: 900 Member
    donimfp wrote: »
    "I'm so glad I don't have to drink." I don't think of this as "Day 2 and counting." I just feel good not to feel hungover, stressed, conflicted, nauseated, and deprived (of that poison that makes me so unhappy).

    I feel the same way. I remember when I really realized drinking was actually becoming a problem for me. It was when I got up one morning & thought, "I don't want to drink today." But realized that I likely would drink today. I'd "try" to make a deal with myself & then repeat the same pattern I'd been repeating for too long, make the deal in the a.m. & as my day progressed, I'd start making a different deal & promise myself I'd only have one...well...maybe two! Three max!! I remember thinking of my alcoholic ex-hubby!! It did begin to feel like a prison.

    This is a process and the real test will be when a big stressor comes along. I've had one situation recently that would have definitely required a bottle of wine to calm me down, but have decided to deal with it differently. So far so good :) One day at a time. I can do pretty much anything for one 24-hour period! So can y'all.

    L <3 VE BEING SOBER!!

  • RubyRed427
    RubyRed427 Posts: 4,416 Member
    @JenT304 @donimfp For me, I feel like alcohol is my prison and I keep going back to prison. I like how you both paraphrased that.
    Had a few drinks last night, didn't even enjoy them but was out with friends. Today, I feel awful. Back to prison. I will buy that book today and read it. I need some hope.
    For the next ten days, I should be fine. I'm going on vacation with extended family and they dont drink, so I wont be tempted.

  • RubyRed427
    RubyRed427 Posts: 4,416 Member
    lorrainequiche59 wrote: »

    I've been doing some work on mindfulness through a meditation CD a former therapist gave me. I've been consistently meditating for a couple of weeks now & realize that time will tell how it benefits me. I think the key is consistency. Does anyone have any personal experience to relate showing the benefits of mindfulness training?

    I have been meditating for 5 months now nearly every day. I do know that this article speaks about escaping suffering when you do mindfulness meditation. I can relate to that. I know I feel quite different and much calmer after I've meditated.
    https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/the-courage-be-present/201001/how-practice-mindfulness-meditation
  • RubyRed427
    RubyRed427 Posts: 4,416 Member
    @trishfit2014 We love you, too. Safe travels!
  • RubyRed427
    RubyRed427 Posts: 4,416 Member
    edited June 2018
    https://community.myfitnesspal.com/en/discussion/10678084/less-alcohol-july-2018-one-day-at-a-time#latest

    The July thread has been posted!! See you in July!
    @NovusDies Thanks again for your efforts to organize and synthesize our collective, helpful tip list. I think I successfully copied it!

    For our newer friends, wait until you see the list of tips and hints we have for you on the July thread. We aren't experts, but from our sincere desire to have less alcohol in our lives, we have a beautiful resource list for YOU <3
  • karenesg
    karenesg Posts: 318 Member
    JenT304 wrote: »
    @donimfp Thank you for sharing your thoughts on that book. I once posted a quote on here about "habits are the only prison where the locks are on the inside. When we are ready we simply stand up and open the door and walk out to freedom." I love this image.

    I like this. Yeah, good image. Thank you!
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