Red Flags
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One of my red flags is I'm a ham.4
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Is this a swipe at me personally? Sorry if it's not but these Chit Chat waters get sharky sometimes and I assume the worst. Anyhow, I started a thread with this theme, that's all I meant about the "font of inspiration " thing. It was legit.
No definitely not a swipe. Just trying to clarify my position. I may not always agree with you, but i have never thought of you as a hypocrite at all. You think, i respect you.2 -
Is this a swipe at me personally? Sorry if it's not but these Chit Chat waters get sharky sometimes and I assume the worst. Anyhow, I started a thread with this theme, that's all I meant about the "font of inspiration " thing. It was legit.
No definitely not a swipe. Just trying to clarify my position. I may not always agree with you, but i have never thought of you as a hypocrite at all. You think, i respect you.
Don't make me have an unrequited moonlight fantasy about carressing your rugged cheeks and gazing into your penetrating eyes. Again.4 -
Mr_Healthy_Habits wrote: »Wait I'm confused about the red flags... Are these supposed to be... Run if you see these traits in me... Or traits that would cause me to run when I see them in others?
If the later, well then this is just like every other... What do you hate about people thread...
If they are my own faults then, we'll that's rather interesting.
I've thought about doing a thread before regarding our own faults... But it seems so many people here suffer from some type of depression or anxiety, so I felt it unwise to create something where people would just use it to bludgeon themselves...
- I way, and I mean way over think and analyze everything... Everything. To the point of paralysis.
I think the intention was what are your own faults. I feel like to some degree that is like an interview where someone asks your biggest weakness and you answer "I just work WAY too hard sometimes"
You know what's funny...
I've actually used that in an interview before lol, the fact that I over think things I meant...
But seriously, I wish it was something I had better control of... I've listened to tons of audiobooks for just this issue.
I know that I've already reached a decision subconsciously and that whatever is going to happen will happen regardless of my mullings, so why not just jump or eat the frog, bite the bullet or act...
Although this is not always the case, ironically I don't really have this issue at work lol4 -
Avocado_AS5 wrote: »george5911 wrote: »Red flags you should catch about me
-I've been told I like to brood a lot and that I always seem down based on my (lack of) expression. Really I'm just the stoic type and I promise a nothing face is a happy face.
-I have a tendency to follow through with bad choices and decisions to the end, just to learn what not to do again.
-I like dogs more than people. A lot of people say this, but if a person and a dog were drowning in a river, I'd probably save the dog. You shoulda learned to swim.
-I have no control when M&M's are in the equation. Game over.
-I have control issues. Not so much as in what you do, but as in I'm driving, I'm pushing the cart, I'm doing the heavy lifting etc...
-I love babies. I had 4. I still have them, and they are full blown children now. I still love them, but I miss babies. (not going to make anymore though, I promise)
-I don't let things go because of the way you were raised. You should be at least 30 to talk to me, by now you've had plenty of time to figure the world out.
Red Flags I'll catch about you
-You want to date me seriously even though I live on my sisters sofa. I need to be held accountable too, and you have no standards.
-You use astrology as your faith. What is the point if the story has already been written?
-You have children from a previous relationship, but are not involved.
-You can not turn your phone off and put it away for the weekend every once in a while. All those status updates and emails will still be there on Monday.
-You're so independent that you won't allow me to open a door or pull up a chair for you. It isn't degrading to your abilities, it's just a nice thing to do and I do it for my guy pals too.
So, are you single or nah?
Very! Fits good too!0 -
laprimaJenny wrote: »
Maybe, to recognize ones hypocrisy is i think normal....but to recognize it and still condemn others on similar faults is to me a red flag.8 -
laprimaJenny wrote: »
This is kinda how human nature works and has always worked: that which people despise most in others is what they fear or don't like about themselves. That's why you'll find so many raging homophobes on the DL asking to be treated like the prom queen.6 -
Bullet_with_Butterfly_Wings wrote: »Everyone has their quirks and idiosyncrasies. What you might see as a red flag in one person, you are willing to work through with another. I think it depends on what you know and how long you have known the person and what type of relationship has been established. If I've chatted with you a handful of times and a flag goes up, I'm out. If some sort of relationship has been established and I see a I'm more willing to work through it, depending of course on what the red flag is. Some red flags are a simple misunderstandings, Some are because the person in question is in fact unstable.
Best yet, thread over :-)
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I tend to prefer sleep over hanging out.3
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Mean_Spice wrote: »All my away from work time, I want to spend alone. At this point in my life, I guess I am a grouchy old man :-). I can not wait till retirement so I can get up at 0600AM and make other people late for work ;-P
LOL, when my husband and I were in our 20's, we would be in a rush to get to work. There was a seniors community on the way. So at 6:30, they were up, pulling out into traffic, putting on their brakes and then creeping up to the 7-11 at the corner to get a coffee and the newspaper. And making us crazy, wondering why the *kitten* they were out there in the way of people trying to get to work. I mean, they had all day.1 -
laprimaJenny wrote: »TheSneakyCheese wrote: »I will judge you on your cheese of preference.
What cheese is your favourite?
All the cheeses!2 -
Woah woah woah....red flags? Here I've been looking for blue flags hanging out their backside, but only on the left side is that not correvt? If not.....I've been doing everything wrong!1
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I'm a momma's boy. I'll clutch onto your skirt tail in public and ask if we can get ice cream later.
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-I get needy and want lots of cuddles.
-My house is either complete perfection or a mess (OCD), there is no in between really.
-I say things too soon because I start getting the feels...
Being single can sometimes be toughhhhhhhh.
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2
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Gah.... red flags about me....
-I'm lazy
-I'm very stubborn
-I won't argue, just get quiet and shut down.
-I can hold a grudge for quite some time.
-This could be different if I met someone I wanted to be with, but at this point, if I have an issue with someone, and it's a repeat issue, I'm just walking away. I am more inclined to just cut you out of my life, than try and make it work.... again and again and again.
-I always think I'm right. And will..... (usually grudgingly) admit when I'm wrong... quietly. Maybe. Don't push it.
-When it comes to dating, I don't do second chances. If a breakup happens, its done. Over. Never again.
-I am a pushover with those I care about, and depending on how often it happens, I can be resentful about it. But I won't say anything.
-I'm passive aggressive.
-I make excuses for other people's shortcomings.
-I refuse to change anything about myself until I decide I want to.
-I am picky when it comes to food (could be seen as a red flag to some....?)5 -
Gah.... red flags about me....
-I'm lazy
-I'm very stubborn
-I won't argue, just get quiet and shut down.
-I can hold a grudge for quite some time.
-This could be different if I met someone I wanted to be with, but at this point, if I have an issue with someone, and it's a repeat issue, I'm just walking away. I am more inclined to just cut you out of my life, than try and make it work.... again and again and again.
-I always think I'm right. And will..... (usually grudgingly) admit when I'm wrong... quietly. Maybe. Don't push it.
-When it comes to dating, I don't do second chances. If a breakup happens, its done. Over. Never again.
-I am a pushover with those I care about, and depending on how often it happens, I can be resentful about it. But I won't say anything.
-I'm passive aggressive.
-I make excuses for other people's shortcomings.
-I refuse to change anything about myself until I decide I want to.
-I am picky when it comes to food (could be seen as a red flag to some....?)
When you meet someone that pushes you out of these comfort levels they are a very special person. Some people go into fight/flight mode but it sounds like you might be someone that goes into a freeze mode. I do the same thing. (and i should note, these aren't red flags...just things that make you the wonderful you that you are)2 -
Gah.... red flags about me....
-I'm lazy
-I'm very stubborn
-I won't argue, just get quiet and shut down.
-I can hold a grudge for quite some time.
-This could be different if I met someone I wanted to be with, but at this point, if I have an issue with someone, and it's a repeat issue, I'm just walking away. I am more inclined to just cut you out of my life, than try and make it work.... again and again and again.
-I always think I'm right. And will..... (usually grudgingly) admit when I'm wrong... quietly. Maybe. Don't push it.
-When it comes to dating, I don't do second chances. If a breakup happens, its done. Over. Never again.
-I am a pushover with those I care about, and depending on how often it happens, I can be resentful about it. But I won't say anything.
-I'm passive aggressive.
-I make excuses for other people's shortcomings.
-I refuse to change anything about myself until I decide I want to.
-I am picky when it comes to food (could be seen as a red flag to some....?)
When you meet someone that pushes you out of these comfort levels they are a very special person. Some people go into fight/flight mode but it sounds like you might be someone that goes into a freeze mode. I do the same thing. (and i should note, these aren't red flags...just things that make you the wonderful you that you are)
He kinna smawt.1 -
Gah.... red flags about me....
-I'm lazy
-I'm very stubborn
-I won't argue, just get quiet and shut down.
-I can hold a grudge for quite some time.
-This could be different if I met someone I wanted to be with, but at this point, if I have an issue with someone, and it's a repeat issue, I'm just walking away. I am more inclined to just cut you out of my life, than try and make it work.... again and again and again.
-I always think I'm right. And will..... (usually grudgingly) admit when I'm wrong... quietly. Maybe. Don't push it.
-When it comes to dating, I don't do second chances. If a breakup happens, its done. Over. Never again.
-I am a pushover with those I care about, and depending on how often it happens, I can be resentful about it. But I won't say anything.
-I'm passive aggressive.
-I make excuses for other people's shortcomings.
-I refuse to change anything about myself until I decide I want to.
-I am picky when it comes to food (could be seen as a red flag to some....?)
When you meet someone that pushes you out of these comfort levels they are a very special person. Some people go into fight/flight mode but it sounds like you might be someone that goes into a freeze mode. I do the same thing. (and i should note, these aren't red flags...just things that make you the wonderful you that you are)
It's more like someone who has no follow through. And me not being a pushover about it.
When I tell someone that something they say or do often, is hurtful to me in some way, and it continues, I am more inclined to deal with it and bring it up over and over, if it's someone I care about.
But if it's a person I am not close to, and I mention it once or twice, there won't be a third time. I'm out.
I do like to be pushed out of my comfort zone, and I have done it to myself many times. Some of those experiences have been amazing. But the timing needs to be right, or I will push back and be biotchy about it. hahaha
I am an introvert and need to mental prepare for things in my own way.
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https://youtu.be/0eUdk0YVHZM
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