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Thoughts on getting old vs aging
Replies
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gentlygently wrote: »When I was a teenager I worked at a nursery gardens - run by a man from his wheelchair, whose dad was cycling everywhere and mending chimneys at 86. Both amazing role models for concentrating on what you CAN do - whatever your obstacles. I certainly aim to be cycling and climbing (hills not ladders on chimneys) at 86.
My original mfp aim was ‘to be fit at fifty’ (I’m 54 now so ‘fit in fifties’ more apt now - but it will ‘to be be fit at 86’ too!)
I have my own obstacles (i have chronic fatigue syndrome - still getting better and luckily for me no fibromyalgia) but as the nursery gardener showed you can have significant health issues and obstacles and still be fit and positive.... And I aim for this.
So whilst my need for daily siestas sometimes make me feel like I am in my 70s - my daily (carefully, boringly, energy managed) dog walking, yoga, music lessons and practise, and occasional cycling/biking /gardening ensure I feel and am a lot healthier than many others in their 50s....
Wow!! You had amazing role models.2 -
When I was in late 40's and training for tough mudder this was my motivation:
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When I was in late 40's and training for tough mudder this was my motivation:
Geezedude...I feel for the poor sap that makes excuses in front of that guy...1 -
So, I'm not old (19 actually) and I guess this is a little out of place for me, but I have two people I would like to compare for the sake of this discussion; my two grandfathers (well, one grandfather and one step grandfather, to be honest).
One is in his 80s and is still working out every day lifting weights, in addition to the many jobs he still works at, and his regular active lifestyle. While he obviously isn't in perfect shape - he is in his 80s after all - he is probably in better shape than many 30 year olds are, (thank G-d [not about the 30 year olds, about him]).
The other is almost 70, and while I've only known him for a couple of years, his health is definitely on the decline, and every time I see him he looks about a year older (I see him about once a month). He doesn't work out at all, and I think it shows very clearly.
And one last thing that "probably-should-have-been-said-earlier-but-I-forgot-and-am-too-lazy-to-go-back-so-I-will-stick-it-in-here." The healthy one eats way less healthy food than the unhealthy one. The unhealthy one eats (pardon my language) "health freak food" and the other one eats "regular food".
Also, I get that everyone is different and it probably has to do with genetics and many other stuff, but yeah, it definitely has a lot to do with your outlook and care.8 -
I have a friend who is 91. We met at a cafe a couple of years where we found we were both going to the theatre that afternoon.
After the theatre he asked for my email address so that we could meet up again and we now meet up every few weeks, (except during winter), either to go to the theatre or another outing. He still drives, although this depends on the weather, and lately he's used the bus more often.
He goes out for meals with another female friend, travels to a new town to get his haircut as his hairdresser moved - he is in the U3A and plays bridge and goes to a jazz appreciation group. His social life is far busier than mine. He travels abroad frequently, his only concession to old age is that he now asks his family to sort out the travel arrangements.
He has a very trim figure and looks years younger than he is. I really need to up my game if I'm going to be as healthy at that age, asuming that I'll reach it6 -
The way I think of it, when you are young you train for fun or glory or excitement. Later you train because it centers you and makes you complete. Still later you train to remain healthy. Eventually you train to fight against your greatest opponent, age, the one who stalks us all. Your greatest opponent will be age.4
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ttippie2000 wrote: »The way I think of it, when you are young you train for fun or glory or excitement. Later you train because it centers you and makes you complete. Still later you train to remain healthy. Eventually you train to fight against your greatest opponent, age, the one who stalks us all. Your greatest opponent will be age.
Dunno. Stage III cancer was a pretty decent opponent, when I wasn't "old" (44 at the time). So was full-bore cancer treatment.
There are other "great opponents", though: Accident, illness, dementia, none of them necessarily age-related. Some of us will die young, and never meet "greatest opponent age", and some will die quickly without much age-related disability. (My martial arts teacher husband, fit guy, died at 45 of esophageal cancer: Playing softball regularly in a league in September, dead in October.) I knew a guy who was born with cerebral palsy, and trained hard and regularly just to have a life a little bit like one I could have without any particular effort at all (and even with a bunch of bad habits on top of my ease).
Age per se being the greatest opponent, I think, signals kind of a fortunate life. I know I'm grateful for mine.
I think I hear what you're saying, and generally agree, though.8 -
ttippie2000 wrote: »The way I think of it, when you are young you train for fun or glory or excitement. Later you train because it centers you and makes you complete. Still later you train to remain healthy. Eventually you train to fight against your greatest opponent, age, the one who stalks us all. Your greatest opponent will be age.
I hear where you're coming from, although my view is different. Due to circumstances that were only slightly controllable by me, my younger years were my greatest opponent, by far. Given the opportunity to do it all again, I would decline.
The answers and experience I've gained through the years, and believe it or not age itself, have given me the freedom I never had as a youth. I certainly don't have all the answers, never will. But I have the freedom to let it be someone else's turn now.
That will make sense to some and probably sound silly to others, and that's ok. The years have been better to me, than not. 😉🙂3 -
Age per se being the greatest opponent, I think, signals kind of a fortunate life. I know I'm grateful for mine.
Great point, Ann. Thank you for the reminder to be grateful for the gift of old age. All of us have lost someone who did not receive that gift.
I don't know if there is an afterlife. I hope there is, though. There are several people I hope to see again.
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Back when I was in my 20s I remember going to the gym, seeing women in their 40s, and wondering whether I would still be working out when I got to be that "old". It seemed like such a lifelong commitment to exercise, and at that age, I hadn't even committed to a relationship for more than a few months. Of course, decades later, I am still at it, and now when I see women in their 60s and 70s at the gym, I know that I too am in it for the long run.
I will be turning 50 this summer (I keep checking the mail for my AARP card) and I feel just as fit as I did at 30. Granted some things aren't as perky as they used to be (having three kids will do that). I have to touch up my grey roots on a regular basis. I wish I had been more diligent about using sunscreen in my youth. But overall, I feel great. I listen to friends my age complain about their health issues, the meds they take, and I realize I am lucky to be as healthy as I am. On Facebook I see people I knew in high school who seem so much older...suffering from age- and weight-related problems. The only thing I take is a daily multi-vitamin...and that's mostly just an excuse to eat gummies every day. Maybe part of it is that I was a little slow to mature. I got married in my early 30s and didn't have kids until my mid-to-late 30s. This often means I am the oldest mom in the room...so I have to keep up with those youngsters. On the other hand, I don't want to look like I am desperately trying to cling to my youth. Sometimes I worry that I dress too young, but I figure Jennifers Anniston and Lopez are my age, so if they can get away with something, so can I.
Of course just because I feel young doesn't mean I can ignore the realities of aging. I figure menopause is just around the corner. I still need to schedule mammograms and colonoscopies...I have a tendency to avoid seeing my own doctor regularly. I should probably get a bone density scan, since osteoporosis does run in my family (we tend to be slim and small-boned people). Obviously I know leading a healthy lifestyle is guarantee of living to a ripe old age...but my grandmas both survived to their 90s (one is still alive and kicking and one week younger than Betty White) so I like to think genetics are on my side.6 -
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I just turned the big five O!
I have the mindset to stay active & have yet to slow down. People tell me I look much younger!
However I tend to push myself as hard as I did when I was 20. This sometimes causes much soreness. This past weekend I did some hill work. I was way ahead of guys my age and some younger. My right knee is reminding me that it might have been too much too soon... lol3 -
I think the comment about a guarantee of living to a ripe old age was a mistake, I think she meant to say no guarantee judging by the rest of the comment.3
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I plan to be walking and talking at my 110th birthday and have invited a few but it does require age discrimination.4
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GaleHawkins wrote: »I plan to be walking and talking at my 110th birthday and have invited a few but it does require age discrimination.
Nice 😁1 -
RetiredAndLovingIt wrote: »I think the comment about a guarantee of living to a ripe old age was a mistake, I think she meant to say no guarantee judging by the rest of the comment.
Yes. Darn the editing time limit.2 -
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My parents are in their 70s and just retired to VA. They had a 2 story house built on a decent sized piece of land, and everyone told them they were nuts to make their retirement home with stairs and a big yard to care for. But their philosophy is use it or lose it. If I have to get up the stairs, I'll prioritize being capable of getting up the stairs.
THIS...
I turn 63 this year... and other than back surgery about 23 years ago, and a nasty sneaky development of raging bursitis flaring-up in my left hip this last fall (thank the gods for cortisone shots... I am not used to not being able to 'just walk it off'), I am in surprisingly decent shape/activity level (Now that I've lost weight that is!)
I live in a two story house (and constantly use all 3 levels (lotsa stairs, tall ceilings!)
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My office area at work is on the second floor with a long set of steep stairs I am up and down at least 2 dozen times a day!
When customers my age come into the show-room, and are daunted by the prospect of having to go up those stairs, outwardly I commiserate with them... but inwardly? I thank my lucky stairs I have my two built-in stairmasters... as I give them full credit for just how well I CAN manage stairs (yes, even when the bursitis 'hit')
I am convinced that to move to a one level house / no stairs at work would quickly result in me finding stairs daunting as well, as I all too well remember that at a much heavier weight, I used to struggle in years past as well.
Yes, I also love to walk... sure do miss my walking partner, but not sure I will ever be ready for another (miss my faithful 'KIta' [ a husky], too much still).
Have never feared death (I am sure I will 'miss' out on things that happen after I am gone though, and that bothers me some)... plus I am constantly wanting to try/do new things.
Recently had a blast learning to use a plasma cutter and designing/making a steel 'dragon' head wall-art for my son for christmas! LOL
Before too much longer I am determined to try skydiving.. at least once! (despite being terrified of heights!).
It WILL happen.
I dare anyone to tell me I am too old! LOL
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This is so inspiring!!! I'm only 32 but I look at my husband who just turned 40 & it scares me to know how quickly his health went downhill within the past 5 yrs due to not taking care of himself, physically and mentally. I try to have faith he will make a change bc right now he's acting like someone who is in there 50's who hasn't' taken care of themselves.. (no offence to anyone) I just wish he had someone who'd push him to do better in his health.
Thank you for this read! 3 -
ShellyMacchi wrote: ».....
My parents are in their 70s and just retired to VA. They had a 2 story house built on a decent sized piece of land, and everyone told them they were nuts to make their retirement home with stairs and a big yard to care for. But their philosophy is use it or lose it. If I have to get up the stairs, I'll prioritize being capable of getting up the stairs.
THIS...
I turn 63 this year... and other than back surgery about 23 years ago, and a nasty sneaky development of raging bursitis flaring-up in my left hip this last fall (thank the gods for cortisone shots... I am not used to not being able to 'just walk it off'), I am in surprisingly decent shape/activity level (Now that I've lost weight that is!)
I live in a two story house (and constantly use all 3 levels (lotsa stairs, tall ceilings!)
+
My office area at work is on the second floor with a long set of steep stairs I am up and down at least 2 dozen times a day!
When customers my age come into the show-room, and are daunted by the prospect of having to go up those stairs, outwardly I commiserate with them... but inwardly? I thank my lucky stairs I have my two built-in stairmasters... as I give them full credit for just how well I CAN manage stairs (yes, even when the bursitis 'hit')
I am convinced that to move to a one level house / no stairs at work would quickly result in me finding stairs daunting as well, as I all too well remember that at a much heavier weight, I used to struggle in years past as well.
Yes, I also love to walk... sure do miss my walking partner, but not sure I will ever be ready for another (miss my faithful 'KIta' [ a husky], too much still).
Have never feared death (I am sure I will 'miss' out on things that happen after I am gone though, and that bothers me some)... plus I am constantly wanting to try/do new things.
Recently had a blast learning to use a plasma cutter and designing/making a steel 'dragon' head wall-art for my son for christmas! LOL
Before too much longer I am determined to try skydiving.. at least once! (despite being terrified of heights!).
It WILL happen.
I dare anyone to tell me I am too old! LOL
Love your attitude, and that last bolded line 1 -
This is so inspiring!!! I'm only 32 but I look at my husband who just turned 40 & it scares me to know how quickly his health went downhill within the past 5 yrs due to not taking care of himself, physically and mentally. I try to have faith he will make a change bc right now he's acting like someone who is in there 50's who hasn't' taken care of themselves.. (no offence to anyone) I just wish he had someone who'd push him to do better in his health. Thank you for this read!
You'll be the best inspiration he will have. Keep yourself going and be patient. Us guys...we can be slow sometimes
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ShellyMacchi wrote: »
I dare anyone to tell me I am too old! LOL
I like your style, Shelly! <thumbs up>
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I will be 51 next week and my husband is 55. To me age is a number. I have always admired people in their 60s 70s and 80s who are very active and have such a vibrant, positive outlook on life.
I work out 6 days a week and people are shocked to know that I am 51. I love life, and I always try to find ways to better myself spiritually, mentally and physically. Until God calls me home I am going to keep it going with vigor and vitality and enjoy this journey.
My 27 yr old son wanted us to go with him and his friends to Vegas for his birthday. His friends thought we were the coolest and was seeking us out to hang with. We had a great time!
My mom is 77 and is very active. My dad is 76 and he acts like he's 96.
It's all about how you view yourself and life.
If you feel like you can't do this or that because you are old then you will feel and look old.5 -
I completely agree. Have you ever had people around you actually get uncomfortable because of your activity? I'm going to spend Sunday with a room full of them lol.I will be 51 next week and my husband is 55. To me age is a number. I have always admired people in their 60s 70s and 80s who are very active and have such a vibrant, positive outlook on life.
I work out 6 days a week and people are shocked to know that I am 51. I love life, and I always try to find ways to better myself spiritually, mentally and physically. Until God calls me home I am going to keep it going with vigor and vitality and enjoy this journey.
My 27 yr old son wanted us to go with him and his friends to Vegas for his birthday. His friends thought we were the coolest and was seeking us out to hang with. We had a great time!
My mom is 77 and is very active. My dad is 76 and he acts like he's 96.
It's all about how you view yourself and life.
If you feel like you can't do this or that because you are old then you will feel and look old.
I don't try to go over the top around anyone, but I do insist on just being me and that means being active and living the fullest I'm able until...I can't
5 -
ttippie2000 wrote: »The way I think of it, when you are young you train for fun or glory or excitement. Later you train because it centers you and makes you complete. Still later you train to remain healthy. Eventually you train to fight against your greatest opponent, age, the one who stalks us all. Your greatest opponent will be age.
This is a good perspective that I wish people in their teens and 20s had. I know so many people who wrecked their health by pushing themselves too far in sports or chasing gym PRs and ended up impaired and physically limited way too soon. I wouldn't trade being in my late 40s and beyond and feeling great physically for any amount of high school, college, or gym "glory" .3 -
I completely agree. Have you ever had people around you actually get uncomfortable because of your activity? I'm going to spend Sunday with a room full of them lol.I will be 51 next week and my husband is 55. To me age is a number. I have always admired people in their 60s 70s and 80s who are very active and have such a vibrant, positive outlook on life.
I work out 6 days a week and people are shocked to know that I am 51. I love life, and I always try to find ways to better myself spiritually, mentally and physically. Until God calls me home I am going to keep it going with vigor and vitality and enjoy this journey.
My 27 yr old son wanted us to go with him and his friends to Vegas for his birthday. His friends thought we were the coolest and was seeking us out to hang with. We had a great time!
My mom is 77 and is very active. My dad is 76 and he acts like he's 96.
It's all about how you view yourself and life.
If you feel like you can't do this or that because you are old then you will feel and look old.
I don't try to go over the top around anyone, but I do insist on just being me and that means being active and living the fullest I'm able until...I can't
I literally had a conversation with my mom this morning about your post. I told her I am so proud of her and to stay as active as she can. She knows when she needs to rest but she really loves her activities.
She and people like her keep me motivated.
So @Phirrgus keep being you. Those people that are uncomfortable is because you are making them look bad and I am sure they regret not taking care of themselves. US OLD PEOPLE ROCK!!!
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I completely agree. Have you ever had people around you actually get uncomfortable because of your activity? I'm going to spend Sunday with a room full of them lol.I will be 51 next week and my husband is 55. To me age is a number. I have always admired people in their 60s 70s and 80s who are very active and have such a vibrant, positive outlook on life.
I work out 6 days a week and people are shocked to know that I am 51. I love life, and I always try to find ways to better myself spiritually, mentally and physically. Until God calls me home I am going to keep it going with vigor and vitality and enjoy this journey.
My 27 yr old son wanted us to go with him and his friends to Vegas for his birthday. His friends thought we were the coolest and was seeking us out to hang with. We had a great time!
My mom is 77 and is very active. My dad is 76 and he acts like he's 96.
It's all about how you view yourself and life.
If you feel like you can't do this or that because you are old then you will feel and look old.
I don't try to go over the top around anyone, but I do insist on just being me and that means being active and living the fullest I'm able until...I can't
I literally had a conversation with my mom this morning about your post. I told her I am so proud of her and to stay as active as she can. She knows when she needs to rest but she really loves her activities.
She and people like her keep me motivated.
So @Phirrgus keep being you. Those people that are uncomfortable is because you are making them look bad and I am sure they regret not taking care of themselves. US OLD PEOPLE ROCK!!!
@dbanks80 and you as well! I Love folks like your (and my!) Mothers...and if anyone were to ask if we're trying to redefine "old" I would say oh hell yes . Let's keep going.
🙂💪👊1 -
I completely agree. Have you ever had people around you actually get uncomfortable because of your activity? I'm going to spend Sunday with a room full of them lol.I will be 51 next week and my husband is 55. To me age is a number. I have always admired people in their 60s 70s and 80s who are very active and have such a vibrant, positive outlook on life.
I work out 6 days a week and people are shocked to know that I am 51. I love life, and I always try to find ways to better myself spiritually, mentally and physically. Until God calls me home I am going to keep it going with vigor and vitality and enjoy this journey.
My 27 yr old son wanted us to go with him and his friends to Vegas for his birthday. His friends thought we were the coolest and was seeking us out to hang with. We had a great time!
My mom is 77 and is very active. My dad is 76 and he acts like he's 96.
It's all about how you view yourself and life.
If you feel like you can't do this or that because you are old then you will feel and look old.
I don't try to go over the top around anyone, but I do insist on just being me and that means being active and living the fullest I'm able until...I can't
I dunno about uncomfortable, but sometimes surprised or concerned.
Usually it's holiday dinners with the in-laws (who kept me after my husband died), many of whom, to be fari, aren't really immobilized older people themselves (golf & bowling regularly at 75-80, for example).
Mostly it's been some side-effect of playing with my great-grand nephew, who's about 5 now: Caught a startled "Look at you!"/"How do you do that?" over my unthinking plank-up after playing with him, lying on the floor on my stomach; and some worry pretty much every time he asked me to pick him up (body crosswise of my arms) and "fly" him through the house with his arms outstretched. (Super-cute: He loved it.) And once when I touched my palms to my toes to stretch after sitting for a while, and my 20-something great niece said she couldn't do that! These have all been things that I didn't even think twice over, until someone said something.
Sometimes very nice young people want to help a li'l ol' lady out in public. (I don't resent this, I appreciate it!) But I've had to control my face a couple of times when, on the way back from bead shows in Tucson, some nice young man saw me hoisting my wheelie carry-on into the overhead and kindly jumped in to help. Poor youth sometimes almost keeled over backwards when he discovered I had overstuffed it, quite possibly past the official 50-pound limit, with stone beads, rocks, minerals, and metal bits to fuel my jewelry-making hobby. (The airlines hardly ever weigh the carry-ons! ). 7 -
In my fortune cookie tonight.24
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YErZ5GjOyas
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