Less Alcohol - June 2019 - One Day at a Time

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Orphia
Orphia Posts: 7,097 Member
in Challenges
Do you want to drink less?

Do it because it's a lovely thing to do for yourself! I bet thinking a day off is a sort of punishment hasn't been working.

Be kind to the person you will wake up as.

Join us in drinking less (whatever that means for you) one day at a time as we continue to support and learn from each other.

MFP LESS ALCOHOL ONE DAY AT A TIME
RESOURCE & GENERAL INFORMATION LIST

Remember that we are here for you and care about you. Check in with us when you have time and let us know what you need!

USING OUR THREAD:
  • Join us at any time - this is a day to day challenge.
  • Set your own goal - this thread is about drinking less and you decide what that means to you.
  • There are no scheduled check-ins - post as often or as little as you want or need.
  • AF is an acronym for Alcohol Free. For others commonly used on this site see - https://community.myfitnesspal.com/en/discussion/1069278/acronyms-and-terms-for-new-mfp-members-v-6/p1
  • To follow this thread easily, bookmark it by clicking on the star at the top right of this thread.

TIPS & OBSERVATIONS FROM OUR MEMBERS:

Getting Started or Starting Over - The Early Days
  • Some people find it easier to set small attainable goals at the beginning to help boost confidence.
  • If you have been drinking daily the first days will be some of the hardest and drinking again will feel like a cure but it delays the relief that only time can provide.
  • There will always be a reason to delay the start/restart of your journey.
  • For those ready to commit to being alcohol-free permanently, the videos on YouTube by Craig Beck will help. He also has a program you can join.
  • You may experience mood swings and anxiety during your first two weeks. It is suggested you try and focus on the benefits of your goal.
  • Cravings are said to last only 6 minutes, so find something to distract you like arming yourself with alternatives: tea, mocktails, activities, etc.
  • You may find that filling the time you drink with other activities like exercise or hobbies can be a helpful distraction.
  • If you find them tempting try and avoid events/outings that will have drinking for a time.
  • Don't let pride or shame keep you from asking for the help you need.
  • Sometimes talking it out or posting your thoughts/feelings/struggles may help you work things out for yourself.
  • It is okay that you don't always have all the answers.
  • Some days will be easier than others.
  • You may have initial/increased sugar cravings.
  • You should never take a day that you have lived up to your goals for granted.
  • Celebrate the smaller victories too. Less alcohol is still less alcohol even if your goal was zero at that moment.
  • Once you begin sticking to your goals for one day to many days you should believe you are capable of the same and more because you are.
  • Annie Grace (This Naked Mind author) has a free program on her website (https://www.alcoholexperiment.com/) called the 30 day experiment which can be joined anonymously.
  • Failure is not giving in and drinking. Failure is to stop trying to accomplish your goals.

Life with Less Alcohol
  • It can be helpful to educate yourself with books and web research (Some suggested books and links listed below).
  • There is no benefit to comparing yourself to others because this is a personal journey.
  • You may often feel conflicted. You will know that there are numerous real benefits to sticking to your goal while at the same time think that alcohol is an important part of stress relief, relaxation, celebration, etc.
  • You may feel punished by not drinking or drinking less but that feeling usually fades with time.
  • Sometimes drinking less or quitting will strain friendships that centered around alcohol.
  • Having a list of reasons to stick to your goals handy for yourself can be helpful. Some lists have included remembering how bad it feels to have a hangover, excess/unwanted calories, having a racing heart during the night, sleeplessness, anxiety, and depression.
  • It is a good idea to have a plan for how you might deal with various tempting scenarios before engaging in a social situation.
  • Self-Reflection is an important part of the journey. Once we figure out why we drink we can hopefully use that information to form new habits and make better and more mindful decisions.
  • Sometimes doing something nice for yourself like a little reward for a success makes the journey easier.
  • You will see many helpful suggestions and ideas that work for some people. However, finding what tactics work for you may involve some trial and error.
  • It is not uncommon for certain activities that were once combined with alcohol to trigger temptation. Many have said that outdoor activities in warmer weather made alcohol very tempting.
  • Many that have spent time with no alcohol after drinking again realized that it doesn't enhance experiences like they once believed it did. Some have said they no longer like the taste.
  • Don't forget how sticking to your goal has made your life better and remember it to motivate you again if you fall off your path.
  • If you begin drinking daily again whether planned like a vacation or unplanned you may once again face a struggle to get it under control.
  • For some people it is easier to not drink than it is to moderate drinking. Others have found moderating impossible.

Reported Benefits of Less or No Drinking: (Results may be incremental, and/or they may vary)
  • Improved sleep after 2,4,7,10,& 60 days
  • Improved skin/complexion after 10 days
  • Improved ease in weight loss. Not only from the savings of alcohol calories but some report making poor food choices after drinking.
  • Increased energy after as few as 2 days
  • Increase in other fun activities. Some have found that daily drinking became their main recreational activity and their world was decreased in size.
  • Increased productivity
  • Reduction of high blood pressure
  • Lower resting heart rate
  • Less Acid Reflux
  • Significant financial savings
  • More creativity
  • More productivity
  • Better relationships with family

When Alcohol Is Used for Avoidance by @Orphia:
  • We drink to ease the stress of the working day, to avoid it.
  • We drink to avoid anxiety in social situations.
  • We drink to avoid making decisions about not drinking.
The Takeaway on Avoidance:
  • Our problems don't go away if we avoid them. We need to learn to face them.
  • I've learned that not drinking makes the problems often go away (e.g. drinking out of worry about drinking).
  • Having a clear head makes our problems seem much smaller.
  • Having a clear head makes problems easier to solve.

How to Be Kind to "Tomorrow You" by @Orphia
  • Instead of lumbering myself with guilt, headaches, and poor nutrition hangovers in the morning, I think of think how nice it would be not to feel that way tomorrow.
  • I worry about "me" and don't want "Tomorrow Me" to feel awful.
  • Instead of thinking alcohol is something nice to have *now*, think of *NOT drinking* as something nice we can do for the person we are when we awaken in the morning.
  • Do you bank calories for a festive occasion? (Handy tactic, I might add.)
  • We can bank a good mood for when we wake up.
  • We need to have sympathy for "Tomorrow You" and be kind to her/him.
  • Don't look at a day without alcohol as a punishment for being bad or having no willpower.
  • Not drinking is a lovely, sympathetic gesture towards the person we are now, and whom we will wake up as.
  • You’d be kind to a stranger. Be kind to Tomorrow You.
LINKS:
A Sharing Site for Women:
http://www.drinkingdiaries.com/about/

General Information/Blog Sites:
https://thesoberschool.com/
http://www.hipsobriety.com/
https://joinclubsoda.co.uk/
https://thisnakedmind.com/blog/
https://alcoholmastery.com/blog/

Sobriety Blog:
http://mummywasasecretdrinker.blogspot.com/

The Thirty Day Experiment:
https://www.alcoholexperiment.com/

Ten Things That Helped Me Quit Booze:
https://unpickledblog.com/2017/01/04/replacement-behaviours-ten-things-that-helped-me-kick-booze/?wref=tp

The Neuroscience Behind How We Make Decisions:
https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/the-athletes-way/201505/the-neuroscience-making-decision

Summary of Book on Addiction:
https://drgabormate.com/book/in-the-realm-of-hungry-ghosts/

Article on the Difference Between Being an Alcoholic and Really Liking to Drink:
https://www.self.com/story/alcoholic-or-just-really-like-to-drink

To the Mom questioning her drinking habits:
http://www.scarymommy.com/questioning-drinking-habits/

Guided Meditations:
http://marc.ucla.edu/mindful-meditations

ALTERNATIVE DRINKS:
Overnight Cold Brew Iced Tea:
https://www.splendidtable.org/story/you-can-cold-brew-iced-tea-while-you-sleep

Mocktail Recipes:
https://www.allrecipes.com/recipes/1822/drinks/mocktails/
https://www.foodandwine.com/cocktails-spirits/mocktails
https://www.townandcountrymag.com/leisure/drinks/how-to/g785/best-mocktail-recipes/

APPS:
  • Daybreak iOS link. A Deakin University study of hundreds of health apps found that Daybreak is one of only four that have proven effective and provide quality assistance.
  • Dry Days by AlcoChange iOS is for those who want to cut down or cut out the booze throughout the year, while seeing the impact it has on your health and wallet.
  • nomo - Sobriety Clocks iOS - In addition to an alcohol clock and monetary savings this app lets you check in and do a sobriety exercise if you're tempted, and connect with accountability partners.
  • Sobriety Counter - Stop Drinking (Sobriety Counter - EasyQuit pro version) Android- Provides health stats, money saved, games to distract you, motivational tips, and several other features

BOOKS:
  • The Naked Mind by Annie Grace
  • Alcohol Lied to Me by Craig Beck
  • Rational Recovery by Jack Trimpey
  • The Unexpected Joy of Being Sober by Catherine Gray
  • The Liars Club, Cherry, and Lit by Mary Karr (3 different publications)
  • Kick the Drink...Easily by Jason Vale
  • Drinking: A Love Story by Caroline Knapp
  • Being Sober: A Step-by-Step Guide to Getting To, Getting Through, and Living in Recovery by Harry Haroutunian
  • The Easy, Illustrated Way to Quit Drinking by Alan Carr
  • Alcohol Explained by William Porter
VIDEOS:

https://youtu.be/T3eIiS-Rl4k
https://youtu.be/Qiueo1nVyF8
https://youtu.be/VB5WyBeFc8U
https://youtu.be/XNr62PhHOC8

Credit and Thanks to the MFP Less Alcohol One Day at a Time participants for their willingness to share their insights and resourcefulness in finding this information.

MFPLARD 12.28.18 Version 2.0.1 (compiled by @NovusDies ; revised 28 Dec 2018 by Orphia)
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Replies

  • Womona
    Womona Posts: 1,605 Member
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    My goal is the same, 4 AF days a week, one on the nights I do have something. If at a party or special event, no more than two with lots of water and food in between so I don’t get wasted.
  • AbandondedKSCharger
    AbandondedKSCharger Posts: 562 Member
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    @FeelinFooFoo Yes! I made one attempt the day after Mother's Day. On day 4 unexpected company, they walked in holding cocktails so I automatically joined them. Today is day 2 and it feels so much easier so far then last time.
    @Womona two at an event is a huge success for me!
  • dawnbgethealthy
    dawnbgethealthy Posts: 7,572 Member
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    Hi : - )
    I am going to set my June goals for 4-5 AF days per week. I tried 5 AF days per week in May, but didn't quite get there.
    May was 18 AF days for me, would have been more, but the warm weather and sweating it out in the garden led to some rum punches, as did being away. It might be challenging during the summer months, but I am going to try to have some discipline.

    June 01 - AF - going out of town in the morning, kind of expect to have a few drinks Sunday.

    Running tally - 1AF day out of 1 day so far lol.
  • KillerFrostie
    KillerFrostie Posts: 18 Member
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    Weekend was a bit of a bust on Sat. Went out to a friend's house and they were serving strawberry martinis. Total 5 drinks, which is 1 over what I've allowed myself. Today I was AF, even though we do "pasta sundays" and that usually means a big Italian meal and some vino. So not only did I replace the pasta with eggplant, but I also replaced the wine with seltzer.
    This week I have two birthdays and a graduation, so navigating these events without alcohol will be challenging.
    Good luck this week everyone!!
  • AbandondedKSCharger
    AbandondedKSCharger Posts: 562 Member
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    annengineer wrote: »
    Hi all! I stopped tracking in May and definitely went over my goals, but had more AF days than I would have without setting them at all.

    This month, and the rest of the year are currently planned to be AF, because I got a positive pregnancy test! Who knows, maybe less drinks helped! Should anything happen (it is after all SUPER early) my primary goal will be to not drown my feelings with it, but fingers crossed that never becomes a concern.

    Congratulations!! That's a great reason to be AF!! Do some research on alcohol fetal syndrom to keep yourself focused.
  • AbandondedKSCharger
    AbandondedKSCharger Posts: 562 Member
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    A new month is always so exciting. A fresh start. Clean slate. High hopes.
    I loved reading all of your posts.
    It pushes me to think about making my own personal goals for the month.
    A good part of me wanted to approach it with an AF month....but not off to a good start..
    I will do the daily teacker also. Because it really helped me to see how I did last month, which was 8 AF days. Most I've had in 12 years.
    My June goal will be AF Mon -Thurs.
    June 1 goal 0 / actual 1 beer
    June 2 goal 0 / actusl 5 beers
    June 3 goal 0 / actual
    June 4 goal 0 / actual
    June 5 goal 0 / actual
    June 6 goal 0 / actual
    June 7 goal....? / actual
    June 8 goal 4 / actual...
    To be continued;)
  • suzanne6094
    suzanne6094 Posts: 104 Member
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    This is a great challenge.... !!!! Such rewards going AF and rather have a drink when you want and not because you need to...

  • Womona
    Womona Posts: 1,605 Member
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    annengineer wrote: »
    Hi all! I stopped tracking in May and definitely went over my goals, but had more AF days than I would have without setting them at all.

    This month, and the rest of the year are currently planned to be AF, because I got a positive pregnancy test! Who knows, maybe less drinks helped! Should anything happen (it is after all SUPER early) my primary goal will be to not drown my feelings with it, but fingers crossed that never becomes a concern.

    Oh my goodness, congratulations! Very exciting news!
  • Womona
    Womona Posts: 1,605 Member
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    Two parties this weekend, only two drinks at one and one at the other yesterday. I did have a glass of wine last night at home “just because”- just because there is a half open bottle of rose in the fridge. (My new favorite.) I really didn’t need or want it, and must avoid the nightly glass because it’s there or because it’s “that time of night”. I am not a human garbage dump. So, plan for next 4 nights is AF.
  • MissMay
    MissMay Posts: 3,554 Member
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    Hello and nice to see our new faces on here.

    Starting another month that begins on a Saturday seemed kind of cruel. So if you did make it with less alcohol through this weekend.... EXCELLENT.

    Tried Kombucha for the first time Saturday night. It was on the drink list at an Italian reastraunt we went to. It was VERY good and for the price you could get like 2.5 pours into a stemmed glass. Not even going to count the .5% (there is more percentage in cough medicine for goodness sake).

    win-win weekend

    😁
  • mckinlau
    mckinlau Posts: 29 Member
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    May’s tally was 11 AF days and I strayed way off track that last week after the holiday weekend. Looking forward to recommitting in June. I have a lot of fitness goals this month and know I won’t see the efforts pay off if I’m drinking calories every night. I think the 30 day AF goal is a bit overwhelming for me right now so I’m going to set my June goal to at least 4-5 AF days a week and more mindful moderation within my calorie goals on weekends.
  • whitpauly
    whitpauly Posts: 1,483 Member
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    annengineer wrote: »
    Hi all! I stopped tracking in May and definitely went over my goals, but had more AF days than I would have without setting them at all.

    This month, and the rest of the year are currently planned to be AF, because I got a positive pregnancy test! Who knows, maybe less drinks helped! Should anything happen (it is after all SUPER early) my primary goal will be to not drown my feelings with it, but fingers crossed that never becomes a concern.

    Congratulations! Very exciting news
  • 2kellymike
    2kellymike Posts: 72 Member
    Options
    annengineer wrote: »
    Hi all! I stopped tracking in May and definitely went over my goals, but had more AF days than I would have without setting them at all.

    This month, and the rest of the year are currently planned to be AF, because I got a positive pregnancy test! Who knows, maybe less drinks helped! Should anything happen (it is after all SUPER early) my primary goal will be to not drown my feelings with it, but fingers crossed that never becomes a concern.

    Congratulations! That's wonderful news. Best wishes!

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