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Guess whats in my pocket?

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Replies

  • Pandemonium_
    Pandemonium_ Posts: 945 Member
    A single serv packet of parmesan cheese. Its old and stained, but one day....one day...she will open it.
  • slimgirljo15
    slimgirljo15 Posts: 269,456 Member
    He has a pocket full of mayonnaise, no bottle.. he just squirted it straight into the pocket
  • pizzamyheart
    pizzamyheart Posts: 1,836 Member
    a little plastic container with a lid. She tells people that inside it she keeps her most favorite fart.
  • lx1x
    lx1x Posts: 38,330 Member
    Miniture pizzas
  • slimgirljo15
    slimgirljo15 Posts: 269,456 Member
    Tacos..
  • lx1x
    lx1x Posts: 38,330 Member
    Scones
  • slimgirljo15
    slimgirljo15 Posts: 269,456 Member
    Paper with phone numbers
  • PaperDoll_
    PaperDoll_ Posts: 32,857 Member
    A stop sign
  • slimgirljo15
    slimgirljo15 Posts: 269,456 Member
    A go sign
  • lx1x
    lx1x Posts: 38,330 Member
    Danger sign
  • Pandemonium_
    Pandemonium_ Posts: 945 Member
    edited September 2019
    A Vanilla ice mask, complete with scored eyebrows. Whenever someone asks him a question, he whips it out, puts it on, and says "All right...stop...collaborate and listen". His friends have stopped coming around recently.
  • CoffeeAndContour
    CoffeeAndContour Posts: 1,466 Member
    Lint and toenail clippings
  • Pandemonium_
    Pandemonium_ Posts: 945 Member
    Business cards that say "Die, Frown, Hate" on them. She hands them out to counter the Live, Laugh, Love crowd.
  • pizzamyheart
    pizzamyheart Posts: 1,836 Member
    A small garden gnome. He likes to show it to people when he feels he needs a conversation starter by waggling his eyebrows and saying "I NEVER use this for anything inappropriate.....or DO I?!!!!"
  • Pandemonium_
    Pandemonium_ Posts: 945 Member
    A half eaten jar of Grey Poupon. Shes just waiting for the day someone asks "pardon me, do you have any Grey Poupon". She meant to leave it unopened but a gal gets hungry.
  • slimgirljo15
    slimgirljo15 Posts: 269,456 Member
    edited September 2019
    A glock and a ski mask
  • pizzamyheart
    pizzamyheart Posts: 1,836 Member
    A notebook of sayings that she makes up herself such as "A bird eats worms because nobody will cook for him" and "a peanut isn't a nut but I am". She likes to pull it out and read it to people on the bus.
  • s1im62
    s1im62 Posts: 31,211 Member
    Gummy bears. Soft and warm. And fuzzy. :/
  • Pandemonium_
    Pandemonium_ Posts: 945 Member
    A handwritten note dated 1982 that reads: "Please excuse Barney for missing ______(the next word is whited out). He has irritable bowel and frequently needs to go poo" Signed, Barneys Mom" He still uses that note to this day when hes late.
  • slimgirljo15
    slimgirljo15 Posts: 269,456 Member
    A pink lacy thong.. his mum always told him to carry spare undies in case of emergency.
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  • pizzamyheart
    pizzamyheart Posts: 1,836 Member
    two styrofoam packing peanuts. When someone farts around her she makes a big deal about it while pulling them out and sticking them in her nose.
  • s131951
    s131951 Posts: 3,776 Member
    A James Franco doll that is missing the right arm.
  • pizzamyheart
    pizzamyheart Posts: 1,836 Member
    A whistle that he will Blow loudly into when he runs because he wants people to think he’s a police car
  • forestfreek
    forestfreek Posts: 5,770 Member
    pizzamyheart wrote: »
    A whistle that he will Blow loudly into when he runs because he wants people to think he’s a police car

    I don’t know why but this struck me as so effing hilarious that I spit my coffee out laughing.
    That’s all I wanted to add.
    Proceed. 😜
  • s131951
    s131951 Posts: 3,776 Member
    edited September 2019
    A train whistle. Just in case she comes across a steam train that happens to have a broken whistle and she can save the day. Then she'll keep the clipped and folded article from the newspaper about the heroic act in her pocket. Thank you forestfreek and thank you Guttenberg. Johannes, not Phteven.
  • pizzamyheart
    pizzamyheart Posts: 1,836 Member
    He has an autographed picture of THE Steve Gutenberg portraying his character “Lobo Marunga”. He also purchased his leather jacket at an auction for ten bucks!
  • Pandemonium_
    Pandemonium_ Posts: 945 Member
    A picture and a peach pit. The picture is one of her face superimposed on Angelina Jolie's body and the pit, she calls Brad. Id describe her daily lunch routine with the pit, but its NSFW, NC-17, and banned in 37 countries.
  • pizzamyheart
    pizzamyheart Posts: 1,836 Member
    He keeps a toothbrush in his pocket. Not one that he brushed his teeth with. No, this one he pulls out and brushed your arm hairs if he notices that you are getting goose bumps. When asked why he does such a thing he only smiles, hums a little under his breath, and whispers "there, there" as he pats you on the butt.
  • slimgirljo15
    slimgirljo15 Posts: 269,456 Member
    edited September 2019
    3 peach seeds for throwing at people who get in her way

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