Less Alcohol - MARCH 2021

mainelylisa

~THIS IS A MONTHLY CONTINUING THREAD THAT HAS BEEN ACTIVE SINCE AS FAR BACK AS 2017. ALL WELCOME ~

Do you want to drink LESS?

Do it because it's a lovely thing to do for yourself!

I bet that thinking a day off is a sort of punishment and hasn't been working.

Be kind to the person you will wake up as.

Join us in drinking LESS (whatever that means for you) one day at a time, as we continue to support and learn from each other.

▪MFP LESS ALCOHOL ONE DAY AT A TIME RESOURCE & GENERAL INFORMATION LIST▪

USING THIS THREAD:
▪▪▪▪▪▪▪▪▪▪
•Join us at any time - this is a day to day challenge.
•Set your own goal - this thread is about drinking less and you decide what that means to you.
•There are no scheduled check-ins - post as often or as little as you want or need.
•AF is an acronym for Alcohol Free. For others commonly used on this site see - https://community.myfitnesspal.com/en/discussion/1069278/acronyms-and-terms-for-new-mfp-members-v-6/p1
•To follow this thread easily, bookmark it by clicking on the star at the top right of this thread.
•Remember that we are here for you and care about you. Check in with us when you have time and let us know what you need!

TIPS & OBSERVATIONS FROM OUR USERS:
▪▪▪▪▪▪▪▪▪▪▪▪▪▪▪▪▪▪▪▪▪▪
•Getting Started or Starting Over - The Early Days
•Some people find it easier to set small attainable goals at the beginning to help boost confidence.
•If you have been drinking daily the first days will be some of the hardest and drinking again will feel like a cure but it delays the relief that only time can provide.
•There will always be a reason to delay the start/restart of your journey.
•For those ready to commit to being alcohol-free permanently, the videos on YouTube by Craig Beck will help. He also has a program you can join.
•You may experience mood swings and anxiety during your first two weeks. It is suggested you try and focus on the benefits of your goal.
•Cravings are said to last only 6 minutes, so find something to distract you like arming yourself with alternatives: tea, mock-tails, activities, etc.
•You may find that filling the time you drink with other activities like exercise or hobbies can be a helpful distraction.
•If you find them tempting try and avoid events/outings that will have drinking for a time.
•Don't let pride or shame keep you from asking for the help you need.
•Sometimes talking it out or posting your thoughts/feelings/struggles may help you work things out for yourself.
•It is okay that you don't always have all the answers.
•Some days will be easier than others.
•You may have initial/increased sugar cravings.
•You should never take a day that you have lived up to your goals for granted.
•Celebrate the smaller victories too. Less alcohol is still less alcohol even if your goal was zero at that moment.
•Once you begin sticking to your goals for one day to many days you should believe you are capable of the same and more because you are.
•Failure is not giving in and drinking. Failure is to stop trying to accomplish your goals.
•Annie Grace (This Naked Mind author) has a free program on her website (https://www.alcoholexperiment.com/) called the 30 day experiment which can be joined anonymously.

Life with Less Alcohol:
▪▪▪▪▪▪▪▪▪▪▪
•It can be helpful to educate yourself with books and web research (Some suggested books and links listed below).
•There is no benefit to comparing yourself to others because this is a personal journey.
•You may often feel conflicted. You will know that there are numerous real benefits to sticking to your goal while at the same time think that alcohol is an important part of stress relief, relaxation, celebration, etc.
•You may feel punished by not drinking or drinking less but that feeling usually fades with time.
•Sometimes drinking less or quitting will strain friendships that centered around alcohol.
•Having a list of reasons to stick to your goals handy for yourself can be helpful. Some lists have included remembering how bad it feels to have a hangover, excess/unwanted calories, having a racing heart during the night, sleeplessness, anxiety, and depression.
•It is a good idea to have a plan for how you might deal with various tempting scenarios before engaging in a social situation.
•Self-Reflection is an important part of the journey. Once we figure out why we drink we can hopefully use that information to form new habits and make better and more mindful decisions.
•Sometimes doing something nice for yourself like a little reward for a success makes the journey easier.
•You will see many helpful suggestions and ideas that work for some people. However, finding what tactics work for you may involve some trial and error.
•It is not uncommon for certain activities that were once combined with alcohol to trigger temptation. Many have said that outdoor activities in warmer weather made alcohol very tempting.
•Many that have spent time with no alcohol after drinking again realized that it doesn't enhance experiences like they once believed it did. Some have said they no longer like the taste.
•Don't forget how sticking to your goal has made your life better and remember it to motivate you again if you fall off your path.
•If you begin drinking daily again whether planned like a vacation or unplanned you may once again face a struggle to get it under control.
•For some people it is easier to not drink than it is to moderate drinking. Others have found moderating impossible.

Reported Benefits of Less or No Drinking: (Results may be incremental, and/or they may vary)
▪▪▪▪▪▪▪▪▪▪▪▪▪▪▪▪▪▪▪▪
•Improved sleep after 2,4,7,10,& 60 days
•Improved skin/complexion after 10 days
•Improved ease in weight loss. Not only from the savings of alcohol calories but some report making poor food choices after drinking.
•Increased energy after as few as 2 days
•Increase in other fun activities. Some have found that daily drinking became their main recreational activity and their world was decreased in size.
•Increased productivity
•Reduction of high blood pressure
•Lower resting heart rate
•Less Acid Re-flux
•Significant financial savings
•More creativity
•More productivity
•Better relationships with family

When Alcohol Is Used for Avoidance:
▪▪▪▪▪▪▪▪▪▪▪▪▪▪▪▪▪▪
•We drink to ease the stress of the working day, to avoid it.
•We drink to avoid anxiety in social situations.
•We drink to avoid making decisions about not drinking.
•The Takeaway on Avoidance, our problems don't go away if we avoid them. We need to learn to face them.
•Having a clear head makes our problems seem much smaller.
•Having a clear head makes problems easier to solve.

How to Be Kind to "Tomorrow You":
▪▪▪▪▪▪▪▪▪▪▪▪▪▪▪▪
•Instead of lumbering with guilt, headaches, and poor nutrition hangovers in the morning, Think of think how nice it would be not to feel that way tomorrow.
•Worry about "me" and don't let "tomorrow Me" feel awful.
•Instead of thinking alcohol is something nice to have *now*, think of *NOT drinking* as something nice we can do for the person we are when we awaken in the morning.
•Do you bank calories for a festive occasion? (Handy tactic) We can bank a good mood for when we wake up.
•We need to have sympathy for "Tomorrow You" and be kind to her/him.
•Don't look at a day without alcohol as a punishment for being bad or having no willpower.
•Not drinking is a lovely, sympathetic gesture towards the person we are now, and whom we will wake up as.
•You’d be kind to a stranger. Be kind to "Tomorrow You".

LINKS:
▪▪▪▪
•Mydrinkaware:
https://www.mydrinkaware.co.uk

•A Sharing Site for Women:
http://www.drinkingdiaries.com/about/

•General Information/Blog Sites:
https://thesoberschool.com/
http://www.hipsobriety.com/
https://joinclubsoda.co.uk/
https://thisnakedmind.com/blog/
https://alcoholmastery.com/blog/

•Drinking and Your Liver:


•Sobriety Blog:
http://mummywasasecretdrinker.blogspot.com/

•The Thirty Day Experiment:
https://www.alcoholexperiment.com/

•Ten Things That Helped Me Quit Booze:
https://unpickledblog.com/2017/01/04/replacement-behaviours-ten-things-that-helped-me-kick-booze/?wref=tp

•The Neuroscience Behind How We Make Decisions:
https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/the-athletes-way/201505/the-neuroscience-making-decision

•Summary of Book on Addiction:
https://drgabormate.com/book/in-the-realm-of-hungry-ghosts/

•Article on the Difference Between Being an Alcoholic and Really Liking to Drink:
https://www.self.com/story/alcoholic-or-just-really-like-to-drink

•To the Mom questioning her drinking habits:
http://www.scarymommy.com/questioning-drinking-habits/

•Guided Meditations:
http://marc.ucla.edu/mindful-meditations

ALTERNATIVE DRINKS:
▪▪▪▪▪▪▪▪▪▪▪
•Overnight Cold Brew Iced Tea:
https://www.splendidtable.org/story/you-can-cold-brew-iced-tea-while-you-sleep

•Mocktail Recipes:
https://www.allrecipes.com/recipes/1822/drinks/mocktails/
https://www.foodandwine.com/cocktails-spirits/mocktails
https://www.townandcountrymag.com/leisure/drinks/how-to/g785/best-mocktail-recipes/

APPS:
▪▪▪▪
•Daybreak iOS link. A Deakin University study of hundreds of health apps found that Daybreak is one of only four that have proven effective and provide quality assistance.
•Dry Days by AlcoChange iOS is for those who want to cut down or cut out the booze throughout the year, while seeing the impact it has on your health and wallet.
•nomo - Sobriety Clocks iOS - In addition to an alcohol clock and monetary savings this app lets you check in and do a sobriety exercise if you're tempted, and connect with accountability partners.
•Sobriety Counter - Stop Drinking (Sobriety Counter - EasyQuit pro version) Android- Provides health stats, money saved, games to distract you, motivational tips, and several other features

BOOKS:
▪▪▪▪
•The Naked Mind by Annie Grace
•Alcohol Lied to Me by Craig Beck
•Rational Recovery by Jack Trimpey
•The Unexpected Joy of Being Sober by Catherine Gray
•The Liars Club, Cherry, and Lit by Mary Karr (3 different publications)
•Kick the Drink...Easily by Jason Vale
•Drinking: A Love Story by Caroline Knapp
•Being Sober: A Step-by-Step Guide to Getting To, Getting Through, and Living in Recovery by Harry Haroutunian
•The Easy, Illustrated Way to Quit Drinking by Alan Carr
•Alcohol Explained by William Porter


Credit and thanks to the MFP Less Alcohol One Day at a Time participants
For their willingness to share their insights and resourcefulness in finding this information

dew11252

Welcome March.

I sure would like to be AF this month. I think alcohol is playing a significant role in GI issues. Have a f/u with the doc next week but.... unless there is a clinical reason for my issues.... I'm holding alcohol responsible. Only way to feel better is process of elimination and alcohol needs to go first.

I gotta do this for me.

Womona

Great job creating the thread @mainelylisa ! Woo hoo! I’m in for March, time to get back on track.

dawnbgethealthy

@mainelylisa
Thank you for taking this on!

lmlmrn

@mainelylisa Thank you for starting March out with a bang whoot whoot

Lilylady3k

@mainelylisa - Thank you for chatting with @MissMay and picking up the thread!

It is so important for me to be accountable and ya'll are a great group that doesn't judge when I slip up on my own personal goals and cheers when I'm on target.

Here I go again! Working on my own personal challenge. Love to hear what others are targeting in March!
NOTE TO SELF: Remember how hard it used to be? It's easier today than it was a year ago, and it will be a lot easier a year from today as long as I keep practicing my skills and don't give up.

* Primary goal in 2021: Do not drink to excess when drinking. This is most important to me personally … don’t go over 2 drinks in a night.
* Secondary goal this year: Strive for 12-16 AF days per month.
* Monitoring:
* Aim for drinking no more than 3 nights in a row.
* Make sure drinks fit into available calories.
* Don’t let drinking lead to snacking.

EXTRA goal for March ... NO GREEN BEER
You are no longer in college or even in any way shape or form Irish and have no reason to celebrate St. Pat's with alcohol and especially not green beer LOL

globalhiker

I'm in for March! My goal is to drink every day this month - but only my favorite non-alcoholic beverages and the healthy stuff.

Then plan to snack daily and still lose weight. I wish to drop from 32.7% to 29% body fat this month. AF will do it.

I plan to write my daily intention for the day, each day on this thread
I plan to feed my motivation by watching out for negative thoughts and changing them to a positive.
I plan to use a breathing exercise to re-set my mind to manage emotions and cravings, then follow it up with a large glass of fizzy water and a distraction.
I plan to reward myself weekly, with a reward that is not digestable or drinkable.

globalhiker

@dew11252 you're on the right path!

For so many years I had GI issues and always blamed the food and just getting older! So I convinced myself that wine daily with dinner was good, because it was acidic and would HELP break down my food. I was wrong.

After doing a month AF I came to realize I have NO GI issues now. I read up on it and found out that alcohol reduces stomach acid so food doesn't get digested optimally. This causes gut bacteria get out of balance, resulting in poor nutrition absorption, bloating, discomfort, you name it. Body goes into a state of inflammation and not only that, dehydration. I used to think oh well, I will just drink a glass of water before bed to hydrate, but no, because alcohol disrupts the hormone that retains water in the body, the kidneys just pee that water right out. Then lie down in bed and get the heartburn. Next came the poor sleep.

All that madness is gone now....:)

MissMay

HELLO March you lovely month.
I am so IN!
Lisa, wonderful job and thank you sincerely for getting us started on a new and fabulous month of accountability.

My 4th March of a Less Alcohol change in my lifestyle. If I had only done this 30+ years ago who knows how different my life would have been?For the better is a definite answer.

@Lilylady3k and @globalhiker you both are rays of morning sunshine everytime I get in to read your posts. 💜.

Keeping with my same goals as Feb I want March to be as relaxed a drinking experience as possible.
I am even looking forward to tying a few new flavors/types of drinks.

▪︎no consecutive days of drinks
▪︎TRY to keep it to once a week only
▪︎1 or 2 standard size drinks, never more in one day
▪︎exercise 5-6 days per week

That is about it on my goals for March. Here's to another 31 days together LA participants.

Best of wishes to everyone and their own personal triumphs.

CMB44512

Lilylady3k wrote: »

@CMB44512 - Onward to March! Curious if your GF is a daily drinker ... I think I remember that she is not. After the gift of rum and the hangover ... did you have the hare of the dog or get out to walk or something to clear the head?

@Lilylady3k you are right, she normally does not drink much. Certainly not daily. It was one of those moments we both got caught up in. We had planned to be in Hawaii last week. Our plans were canceled and money refunded when covid numbers went up this past Fall. We were both feeling defeated and sad when our original departing flight dates came around. Then a friend thought a bottle of rum as a gift would ease our pain. We did to. It did not

We both discussed that it was a stupid over indulgence on our part, no one pushed us to get hangovers. We did not have to open the rum. We each felt bad we dragged the other down the same rum devil road. After we gained our walking legs, we did take a pop over to Bryant Park for some fresh air.

lmlmrn

Hello to all, Hello March
AF last night, but slept poorly the past few nights. After doing some research I found out some of the trouble I am having is a side effect of a medication I started not long ago. But in my case the benefits outway the discomfort of dry throat and sinus stuff.

Back later to post more

Lilylady3k

@CMB44512 - Wonderful that you were able to get some fresh air. I love a good walk myself. DH's foot/toe joint is swelling. He usually joins me but after walking Fri, Sat & Sun 3 miles per day he was unable to make it today.
I do love a good rum drink!!! Though I cannot drink many either. So many recipes ... and I can only imagine the bummer feeling of not making your Hawaiian trip.

Lilylady3k

Okay starting March with 2 glasses of wine this evening with a glass of water before between and after!

Gave my mom a lesson in phishing (pron fishing) this afternoon. She responded to a text message from a number she did not know and provided personal info. The message was asking for political support. Well it was not even a phone number! And on top of that the URL that it told you to go to was not the US politician's url but a similar one with ".co" (Columbia internet country code) instead of what many would read and assume ".com". I told her these were two dead giveaways that it was a fake message (spam).
She is 84 and unaware of this digital world. I worked for HP/HPE for 30 years and received annual phishing training on top of everything else ... and still slip up myself sometimes. I really wish we could trust what we see but we need to be skeptics or at least dive a little deeper sometimes.

vvlucky

Hi all, I am so glad I found this thread. I will start this process tomorrow (today is daughter's 20th birthday celebration). I will post daily. My weight is too high, and it's primarily because I drink too much wine. Looking forward to getting to know you and read about your journeys.

dawnbgethealthy

Happy March!

I am continuing with my goals that I have mostly been following for a year:

• 16-20 AF days per month
• Don't drink 2 days in a row
• Try to keep 2 AF days in between drinks days

I choose the diary style so that I check in every day, keep myself accountable, and can see at a glance where I am at.

Monday March 01 - AF - Had to start the new month off with an AF day : - )

Womona

Lilylady3k wrote: »

@mainelylisa - Thank you for chatting with @MissMay and picking up the thread!

It is so important for me to be accountable and ya'll are a great group that doesn't judge when I slip up on my own personal goals and cheers when I'm on target.

Here I go again! Working on my own personal challenge. Love to hear what others are targeting in March!
NOTE TO SELF: Remember how hard it used to be? It's easier today than it was a year ago, and it will be a lot easier a year from today as long as I keep practicing my skills and don't give up.

* Primary goal in 2021: Do not drink to excess when drinking. This is most important to me personally … don’t go over 2 drinks in a night.
* Secondary goal this year: Strive for 12-16 AF days per month.
* Monitoring:
* Aim for drinking no more than 3 nights in a row.
* Make sure drinks fit into available calories.
* Don’t let drinking lead to snacking.

EXTRA goal for March ... NO GREEN BEER
You are no longer in college or even in any way shape or form Irish and have no reason to celebrate St. Pat's with alcohol and especially not green beer LOL

Very reasonable goals!! Similar to mine, stick to just one, be AF at least 3 days/week.

Yeah, I know, everyone is Irish on St. Patrick’s day, but I never understood the appeal of green beer!

Womona

Started off the new month AF! I was AF last night too, and my weight was down as well. I’ve also been logging my food these last two days, which can only help. Hopefully I’ll be able to sleep through the night tonight. Proud of myself that I didn’t drink wine after coming home from work at 9:00. Just a delicious dinner compliments of my DH!

Womona

The good news, my weight is screaming down by having two nights off of drinking, and actually logging food. 2.8 lbs away from my goal weight!

The bad news, still woke up in the middle of the night and couldn’t sleep. I can’t wait until all the alcohol I drank last week gets out of my system so I can finally get some good shut- eye. Usually happens for me by day 3 or 4. Here’s hoping!

dew11252

AF yesterday
down 2.2 from last week
had a really really good nights sleep
ready to conquer the day

globalhiker

Today will be day 30 of my AF streak.....husband is still doing it with me....

I have really INCREDIBLE news! You can't see me but I am dancing with joy right now.....

I get to sign up for the covid vaccine today finally! Now all I need is for the vaccine passport idea to be implemented and the Canadian border to open so I can schedule a really, really good hiking experience!!! And party with @dawnbgethealthy ...!

globalhiker

Hello @vvlucky good idea to post daily. I saw improvements in me when I did that. And it was beneficial for me to post about days that were not favorable - helped me analyze what went wrong and think about what I could do different next time. Also helped me to lose the guilt which did me no favors.

I also saw even greater improvement when I started to read different online forums like reddit, clubsoda, etc. I'd just search google for sober 30 days or sober curious etc or tips to cut down on drinking, etc. Just knowing there are thousands upon thousands of people out there working towards similar goals (and being incredibly successful) was really motivating. I started to finally accept that I deserve to realize my goals and can absolutely achieve them. I lost the doubt.

Bottom line, losing the DOUBT and losing the GUILT where 2 big turning points to get me on my AF road trip

ducky133

@mainelylisa thank you for taking over the thread! I read daily but rarely post. It is super helpful and I appreciate those of you who post regularly. I have not had an AF night in a long while but in the last few weeks have found that if I cut the size of my drink down it makes a huge difference in terms of no fuzzy memories of the previous night, etc. I want to be consistent with pouring a smaller drink and work towards some AF time.

tiptoethruthetulips

I joined the Feb thread in the hope of going AF at home as I was drinking more and more at home. Open a bottle of wine I was getting to the point where I didn't stop until the bottle was finished. I did reasonably well, had a couple of slip ups, not slip ups at all though really, I stopped at the bottle shop and bought the wine with the intention of drinking it, so not a slip up at all.


For March my goal again is to be AF at home and look for ways to distract myself. I have joined a gym, I will be going to the gym three times a week, go for a walk the other days, do puzzles, read books, connect with some friends. Another goal for the second half of March is to start a clean out of my home in readiness for some renovations or sale.

Lilylady3k

Started to type 2 glasses of wine then realized that I only had 1 tonight LOL!

Stressful day yet again. DD's 1st anniversary party (married during covid shutdown in April 2020 to 10 or less people at the time down from 150) is coming up. The photographer just bailed (after confirming in June and Oct that she would do it) and I'm weeks away needing to now find someone again. Lots to follow up on but the whole idea of invitations, responses, outfits, etc ... I know I'll make it through this but it is a lot to reorganize again.
Glad that it was only 1 glass and not a bucket of bourbon + a bottle of wine. Drinking my water got to shed those pounds I lost and then gained this year. Almost there!

Womona

Love the posts so far!

@Lilylady3k what a drag to have to scramble to find a replacement photographer. Ugh! Hope it all works out. Big events are a part time job to organize, but worth it!

AF again tonight. A little surprised I had no alcohol because I have something to celebrate.... finally getting a sailboat!!! 17’ cat boat on a trailer, but she is beautiful and easy to manage. Put the deposit down today. So excited!!!! Yet I didn’t need a drink! Woo hoo!

lmlmrn

hello to all
AF last night, which was super stressful.. I had interviewed for a p/t job last week, the interview went fantastic and I really thought I would be offered the job before I left the building. Monday I got the email saying they had chosen someone else who had the same level of skills I have but one difference, they had experience with the proprietary software. What a kick in the teeth for me. The urge was really really strong last night and tonight.

I feel the stress devil knocking at my ear, saying get up and just get your drink(s) what's one day out of 31?.....I am struggling and it may or may not happen. We went to Total Wine N More and I bought some new flavor of bitters to put in tonic water. That seemed to help in the past and I am praying it will tonight

dawnbgethealthy

Happy March!

I am continuing with my goals that I have mostly been following for a year:

16-20 AF days per month
Don't drink 2 days in a row
Try to keep 2 AF days in between drinks days

I choose the diary style so that I check in every day, keep myself accountable, and can see at a glance where I am at.

Monday March 01 - AF - Had to start the new month off with an AF day : - )
Tuesday March 02 - AF - Needed to wait 6 minutes many many times, I really felt like having a couple of drinks tonight. I know that I (and my waistline) will be happy tomorrow that I resisted.

Rolling total: 2AF days out of 2 days.

mainelylisa

I'm on generator power and on roaming cell due to tower outage, so not posting much, but so glad to see so many people here!

Goals:

• 20 max drinks in Mar
• No consecutive drinking days
• Exercise 6 out of 7 days

0 out of 20 drinks so far! (But I did start out the month eating Cheetos for breakfast because of 3 drinks on Sunday.)

Womona

lmlmrn wrote: »

hello to all
AF last night, which was super stressful.. I had interviewed for a p/t job last week, the interview went fantastic and I really thought I would be offered the job before I left the building. Monday I got the email saying they had chosen someone else who had the same level of skills I have but one difference, they had experience with the proprietary software. What a kick in the teeth for me. The urge was really really strong last night and tonight.

I feel the stress devil knocking at my ear, saying get up and just get your drink(s) what's one day out of 31?.....I am struggling and it may or may not happen. We went to Total Wine N More and I bought some new flavor of bitters to put in tonic water. That seemed to help in the past and I am praying it will tonight

So sorry to hear you didn’t get the job that seemed like the perfect fit. That really stinks. Nothing worse than that gut punch feeling combined with abject disappointment. I hope you find the perfect one soon!

Whether you drank last night or not, just recognizing your disappointment as a trigger is huge. Beats blindly reaching for a drink.

SLuv0710

dawnbgethealthy wrote: »

Happy March!

I am continuing with my goals that I have mostly been following for a year:

• 16-20 AF days per month
• Don't drink 2 days in a row
• Try to keep 2 AF days in between drinks days

I choose the diary style so that I check in every day, keep myself accountable, and can see at a glance where I am at.

Monday March 01 - AF - Had to start the new month off with an AF day : - )

I lurk a bit in this group, and I really like your thinking around not drinking 2 days in a row and two AF days between. I am going to try that this month as well!

vvlucky

Thank you @globalhiker. Yesterday was Day 1. I've done this before and realize the first few days are easier than the next few. But I'm proud of myself. I stayed within my calorie count.

I appreciated all the advice you gave me yesterday. Especially when you said there are so many people working towards similar goals - and being successful. Part of this - for me - is being private about it because I carry shame.

It was hard to fall asleep - I had a big day work-wise and parenting-wise (all good, though) - but when I did, I slept like a rock. And woke up rested and proud of myself. Through a series of really difficult events in our family, I have kind of lost myself. Spring is the perfect time to start radical self care.

Have a nice day.