Asked for help, REFUSED! *rant*
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You have already taken out 62llb!! You got this. Keep it going!0
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I am SO sorry this happened to you. No one wants anything- - -especially rejection- - -to depend on their weight. And there's a really crazy irony in getting told by a weight loss group that you can't join. If there is a manager, director or other supervisory person and you want to know, you can ask for more specificity. But, really, do you want to hear it?
My guess is that the group has guidelines in place to protect themselves in the event that someone hurts themselves. And, depending on what they are doing, that risk may increase with obesity. That said, I suggest you set that group aside and consider doing what they suggested- - -go to your doctor.
YOUR doctor, based on an evaluation of YOUR body, can tell you what exercise is safe. And I promise, someone in your area can share it with you. There are free/low cost classes at public recreation centers. There are "meetup" groups online for various workouts. You can even create one and invite people to join. Just find out what you are really capable of doing so that you will fee confident approaching any new activity.
All the best. This is a test. DON"T let this slap in the face stop you from moving forward with your fight to be fit!0 -
O.K. First of all, I understand. My BMI is 44, which is not good either. Can I tell you that the reason I think they may be refusing to help you is that with a BMI of 61, you need help, but there are medical concerns with people that have BMI's as high as yours. With medical concerns come certain liabilities - which scares a lot of people. I'm sure that it is not because you are not good for the group, but more than likely just a scare of anything happening to you medically that might be a liability for the group.
If it were me, and If you really think that this group can help you; I would first call the organization and explain it to them the same way that you explained it to us, that you are offended. You know you need help, which is why you sought their help in the first place. Even offer a compromise; if you are able to get a doctor's clearance before starting your fitness regime, do so, and let them know that you strongly want to do this.
If none of that appeals to you, try your local YMCA if you have one. That is the gym I use. The one in my town has very good principles, excellent fitness staffing and they promote a healthy LIFESTYLE....NOT just losing weight. I joined the YMCA recently and they have been patient, understanding, motivating and helpful; but as great as all that is, the biggest part of this journey lies with YOU! Don't give up. Be determined. Don't throw in the towel- instead, pick up the towel and use it to wipe the sweat from your brow! :flowerforyou:0 -
As you're in the UK I can explain this to you.
The Adult Obesity Care Pathway of the NHS provides different services by different teams with different expertise to people at different stages of the care pathway. These services are provided in different settings... community centres, health care settings, hospitals, depending on what they are.
Google your health board and their Obesity Care Pathway for your locality may be online.
Services work like a pyramid, in what they refer to as "tiers", with the most generic services being at the bottom (tier 1) and suitable for the majority of people who may be just overweight, so you're looking at basic public health advice.... All the way to the top (usually tier 4) where there are specialist services for those who are morbidly or super morbidly obese. You are in that category.
The staff were responsible in pointing you to the services that is targeted at your level of need, which in their view is beyond basic lifestyle management. Nobody is out to get you.
This is what I was thinking. I agree with her. You said you have made progress so far and are at a stall. Maybe you could check in with that group and ask them if you got a note from you dr if they would allow you to join. They may want to make sure they aren't going to be help liable if you developed health issues or got hurt.
Just a thought
Best wishes, I hope you don't let this hold you back from the success you are working to achieve.0 -
There SHOULD be programs tailored to include ANYONE who wants to learn healthy nutritional eating habits, and I think it is UNFAIR of an organization to turn away ANYONE no matter their BMI or weight if they need the help. Especally if that organization is TAILORED to help those kinds of people in the first place. If it's a liability thing, have them sign a waiver that keeps the organization safe from anything until the individual reaches a healthy working BMI... JMHO
As fo the OP, My suggestion is forget them. Take it in your own hands. Research, read books, check out online nutritional programs that tailor to you and stick to MFP!. Don't leave it up to someone else to change the way you think and eat. you can do it! Life hits us hard sometimes, even when we don't like it, but its all a matter of how you take the hits and whether you get back up. YOU CAN DO THIS! Don't give up, believe in yourself and know YOU ARE WORTH IT!
Best wishes.0 -
People are funny.
Being turned away was most likely due to the SAFETY of the OP. Their health is in danger due to their weight. At that size there is a number of health and safety concerns that the OP has to deal with. The group told them that they were not able to handle these issues but that there were people who could. Period. They were not being mean or jerks. They were looking at what is best for the patient who approached them.
Yes, it sucks to get told "we can't help you because you exceed our abilities due to your size", but better that then the OP not get the help THEY need. The OP needs specialized help, not random help.0 -
And remember even a Tier 4 service will be completely free of charge. The NHS is great like that.
Is a tier 4 only for surgical intervention? If you were at a teir 4 but decided that you didnt want surgery would there be other options?
Why the H! cant the states do something like this...no instead we got Obummercare :grumble:
Obummer care? I thought Obama care was a step towards more socialised medicine. It is out welfare state that enables free services like this, so I think Obama care will be a good thing. Not that I know much about it but it sounds great to me. But that is a whole other debate. Thank you everyone xxx0 -
Called for an appointment about accessing a tier 3 thing... but not before sending a slightly curt email to first place, saying 'ok fine, i look forward to seeing you in the near future when my bmi is below 40.'
he he, just couldnt resist! I'll show them.0 -
And remember even a Tier 4 service will be completely free of charge. The NHS is great like that.
Is a tier 4 only for surgical intervention? If you were at a teir 4 but decided that you didnt want surgery would there be other options?
Why the H! cant the states do something like this...no instead we got Obummercare :grumble:
Obummer care? I thought Obama care was a step towards more socialised medicine. It is out welfare state that enables free services like this, so I think Obama care will be a good thing. Not that I know much about it but it sounds great to me. But that is a whole other debate. Thank you everyone xxx
It's actually a mandate to purchase private health insurance. It's about as far from socialism as you can get. As an Englishman living in the US, I laugh mightily when I hear people describing the affordable care act as socialism.0 -
Called for an appointment about accessing a tier 3 thing... but not before sending a slightly curt email to first place, saying 'ok fine, i look forward to seeing you in the near future when my bmi is below 40.'
he he, just couldnt resist. I'll show them.0 -
Called for an appointment about accessing a tier 3 thing... but not before sending a slightly curt email to first place, saying 'ok fine, i look forward to seeing you in the near future when my bmi is below 40.'
he he, just couldnt resist. I'll show them.
Glad you called.
Also you'll get all you need from your level 3 service so there should be no need for you to access level 2 later... only unless you wanted to skip in and say "remember me?" 0 -
There SHOULD be programs tailored to include ANYONE who wants to learn healthy nutritional eating habits,
If they include ANYONE, then they aren't tailored. They're generalized.0 -
Hello,
I am trying to lose weight but have found my efforts stalling a lot, like my progress as ground to a halt, and I have not been able to lose in some months. So, I wanted to get things back on track, and I heard about a local organisation that offers fun social group exercise stuff, and also lessons about healthy eating, cooking, lifestyle etc. I thought that this sounded a good thing to get involved in, and a nice friendly way to get help with other people.So I enquired about it.
I was told I could NOT be involved
My BMI is 61, far over their 'top' threshold of 40. Therefore they say they can't help and that I can only gethelp from the HOSPITAL!! I am very angry and upset about this!! I do not want to have to go to the hosptial to get all clinical help like I was an invalid, and also, I don't LIKE hospitals, who does??? It was not what I was after at all- as I say, I was seeking a nice fun informal way to get help- about working towards a better lifestyle, not about being treated as a patient. I think I would benefit much more from the class than hospital. Am I so much of a 'special needs' fatty that the group would be better off without me??
It annoys me that there is a group to help ppl about weight, but they only want to help people with a minor wieght problem. It just upsets me thinking WHY? Is it tht they think I am beyond 'normal' help and interventions? that I wouldbe bad for the group? That I would not keep up wth the class, physically or mentally? What is it?
Ugh, sorry for the rant, just so annoyed!!
Wow!!! No offense but this is discrimination and it makes me very upset. You are willing and able yet they refuse to allow you in? Who do they think they are? Me...I would get a news crew involved in this one and get that rule changed but fast. Good luck!0 -
Wow!!! No offense but this is discrimination and it makes me very upset. You are willing and able yet they refuse to allow you in? Who do they think they are? Me...I would get a news crew involved in this one and get that rule changed but fast. Good luck!
Have you read back? At all...?0 -
Ha ha, I kinda do at least show up one day and say remember me? Not that they probably will, or care if they do, but it make me feel good, haha.
Yeeeah, I was annoyed but I am not one to sue or make a huge fuss and get the press etc. I just ranting on here lol0 -
Hello,
I am trying to lose weight but have found my efforts stalling a lot, like my progress as ground to a halt, and I have not been able to lose in some months. So, I wanted to get things back on track, and I heard about a local organisation that offers fun social group exercise stuff, and also lessons about healthy eating, cooking, lifestyle etc. I thought that this sounded a good thing to get involved in, and a nice friendly way to get help with other people.So I enquired about it.
I was told I could NOT be involved My BMI is 61, far over their 'top' threshold of 40. Therefore they say they can't help and that I can only gethelp from the HOSPITAL!! I am very angry and upset about this!! I do not want to have to go to the hosptial to get all clinical help like I was an invalid, and also, I don't LIKE hospitals, who does??? It was not what I was after at all- as I say, I was seeking a nice fun informal way to get help- about working towards a better lifestyle, not about being treated as a patient. I think I would benefit much more from the class than hospital. Am I so much of a 'special needs' fatty that the group would be better off without me??
It annoys me that there is a group to help ppl about weight, but they only want to help people with a minor wieght problem. It just upsets me thinking WHY? Is it tht they think I am beyond 'normal' help and interventions? that I wouldbe bad for the group? That I would not keep up wth the class, physically or mentally? What is it?
Ugh, sorry for the rant, just so annoyed!!
Wow!!! No offense but this is discrimination and it makes me very upset. You are willing and able yet they refuse to allow you in? Who do they think they are? Me...I would get a news crew involved in this one and get that rule changed but fast. Good luck!
You should really read the thread before posting...0 -
I would sign up for the hospital program, see what it's like, ask what my options are if I don't like it, and then get upset if warranted.
I think you've closed your mind to the hospital program without giving it a chance. It may not help you--but it may. It may provide group support and nutrition discussions found in the other group--if it doesn't, ask how you can get that added to the program.0 -
With a BMI of 61, you are a liability.
As others have pointed out, even a BMI of 40 isn't just a minor weight problem.
They are correct - you should be under doctor supervision. That's not to say the only place you can go is the hospital to get some exercise, but you definitely need to see your doctor.0 -
Ha ha, I kinda do at least show up one day and say remember me? Not that they probably will, or care if they do, but it make me feel good, haha.
Yeeeah, I was annoyed but I am not one to sue or make a huge fuss and get the press etc. I just ranting on here lol
Hey maybe that was a good thing they denied you.. Because it led you to find something BETTER here with what the poster above recommended the 3 tier thing.
so it worked out after all
something better for you! 0 -
There is a lot of prejudice against very overweight people. Somehow, people feel free to make moral judgments about prople because of their size. In my judgment, body weight and composition are morally neutral.
The group you contacted may very well gear their workouts to people within a certain weight range. I know that right now, I cannot keep up with a boot camp type workout, or a hardcore cardio routine, but it isn't because I'm inferior. It's because I'm not physically ready to do thise types of exercises yet. At some point, I will be.
You might be able to get some help from a weight loss support group in your area, or from a nutritionist experienced in dealing with people who have a lot of weight to lose. You might even be able to start an informal group on your own!
Good luck to you.0 -
I went to a weight loss doc once.
The beauty of it.. Insurance pays for it. They don't pay for Weight Watchers or a nutritionist, but the same program done by an MD they pay for.
It was strictly a financial decision. But I lost 25#.
So don't be upset about seeing a doc. it's has its benefits.0 -
I don't think it's fair that a yacht costs hundreds of thousands of dollars and I can't afford one. They should sell them for $10 so everyone can have one.I know it is entitle to make it's own rules but I just think those rules are not fair. I don't want to have to go to a hospital to get help, I want help in that kind of setting. I really feel I would benefit from it, so I don't know why I can't. I think I could keep up because I have as good brain as anyone and I always try my best. I don't know why they assume I couldn't. I don't know that there are any other groups out there, this is the main local organisation for this sort of thing. It's just really frustrating
No need to be condescending to the man! Just because he is upset does not mean that he does not understand the concept of "life isn't fair"
I completely agree.0 -
I CALLED LEVEL 3 PPL AND THEY SAID I CANNOT GO THERE BECAUSE IT IS CLOSING IN TWO WEEKS, FML DEVASTATED. 0
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Oh no... So much for 'The NHS is safe in my hands'...
So sorry to hear that. Chin up honey! xxx0 -
Thanks for your mail. I mailed you back. I don't live in your neck of the woods so I don't know if there is a local funding problem.
If I were you I would contact my GP and discuss with him what you're looking for. At the end of the day they HAVE to meet your clinical needs, even if that means referring you out of area to a neighbouring health board's service.0 -
Again, sorry to be on this note but i dont like how they are keeping services for general obese people, but not for more heavier obese people. we mustnt be a worthy investment,0
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Again, sorry to be on this note but i dont like how they are keeping services for general obese people, but not for more heavier obese people. we mustnt be a worthy investment,
Before anyone jumps on me, i've read the entire thread, I get it. And i'm not 'a hater', just a realist and my BMI started at over 40, so I get it.
The NHS is here to provide general services to English residents (i'm only talking England here), you claim that the 'heavier people aren't a worthy investment' well actually statistically you're not.
24.8% of adults in England are obese, barely 3% of those are morbidly obese (i.e. BMI over 40), so in the grand scheme of statistics what is better for using up limited resources? Helping the 21% of obese people or channelling funds to run programs for the small minority of people who are morbidly obese?
Go to your GP if you feel like you need extra help and see what they say. Although I don't understand why you need it, you've done great so far!
P.s. Your posts do come across like you have a sense of entitlement. I.e. i'm entitled to everything just because and a little whingey. It got my back up a little which could explain some of the 'nastier' comments on the thread.0 -
Well, I am entitled to everything as it happens,I am a UK citizen who pay taxes, as such I am entitled to have my health care needs met, either by the local authoriy or nhs that is all.
The same could be said of most illness(yea yea i know obesity is not a 'proper' condition because it is self inflcted etc, I agree, this is what i am saying, that i dont want too clinical an approach as it happens), they only affect a small number of people, but it still matters.
I just really really DO think I am entitled to this sort of thing. I am going to see my doctor and I am not going to be fobbed off with something like a dietician referal on its own.0 -
Well, I am entitled to everything as it happens,I am a UK citizen who pay taxes, as such I am entitled to have my health care needs met, either by the local authoriy or nhs that is all.
The same could be said of most illness(yea yea i know obesity is not a 'proper' condition because it is self inflcted etc, I agree, this is what i am saying, that i dont want too clinical an approach as it happens), they only affect a small number of people, but it still matters.
I just really really DO think I am entitled to this sort of thing. I am going to see my doctor and I am not going to be fobbed off with something like a dietician referal on its own.
That's an incredibly selfish attitude to have. I am also an UK citizen who pays taxes and for me the NHS is for when i'm sick or injured. Right now i'm fat, not sick.
There's nothing making me fat apart from food. I can control my food through free resources such as this. Apart from general nutrional guidance for education (which you've already said you won't accept) what else are you expecting the NHS to do?! What are you after exactly?
You can't expect a NATIONAL health service to provide tailored programme just for you.0 -
I'm sorry that is just a blinkered point of view. A lot of people with weight issues have such because of psychological issues these need to be addressed. You seem to be worried about the cost to your taxes. Just do a quick Google and you'll see the cost obesity related illnesses cost the bag. By treating and helping people it will reduce your tax burden overall. No matter what people like you wish to think obesity is not as simple as eat lessWell, I am entitled to everything as it happens,I am a UK citizen who pay taxes, as such I am entitled to have my health care needs met, either by the local authoriy or nhs that is all.
The same could be said of most illness(yea yea i know obesity is not a 'proper' condition because it is self inflcted etc, I agree, this is what i am saying, that i dont want too clinical an approach as it happens), they only affect a small number of people, but it still matters.
I just really really DO think I am entitled to this sort of thing. I am going to see my doctor and I am not going to be fobbed off with something like a dietician referal on its own.
That's an incredibly selfish attitude to have. I am also an UK citizen who pays taxes and for me the NHS is for when i'm sick or injured. Right now i'm fat, not sick.
There's nothing making me fat apart from food. I can control my food through free resources such as this. Apart from general nutrional guidance for education (which you've already said you won't accept) what else are you expecting the NHS to do?! What are you after exactly?
You can't expect a NATIONAL health service to provide tailored programme just for you.0
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