WOMEN AGES 50+ FOR AUGUST 2022
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SophieRosieMom wrote: »Karen in VA ~ I looked up Swedish Death Cleaning and boy how I wish my husband would get aboard with that. It makes me quake to think of all the mess our son will have to deal with once we pass! So bad that I can't sleep thinking about it sometimes. Husband will not voice any opinion about what to do when/if he passes before me so I will be in a pickle when it happens.
Rant:We took over his parent's house when they passed (both died the same night after he had a heart attack and she had one helping him). The house was filled with their furnishings, all the contents of an antique shop they had owned, and all the belongings of both their families that has passed before them. Since moving here, DH spent years and years going to estate sales and added much, much more to the piles. He will not make any effort to dispose of this and it will all be left up to our son!
Carol in Ga
Carol - not sure how things work in Georgia, but around here a person can grab whatever personal items they want then turn the house over to an auction company and let them go thru, price, haul away and sell. Your son might have the option of doing that.
I worry about that a little too.
Karen had good ideas letting Habitat for Humanity or a similar charity come in and do the hard work if your son doesn't need income.
Hard to think about this stuff, but as my attorney said, "don't worry about leaving a mess for the survivors/beneficiaries, let them figure it out."
Lanette
SW WA State
OMG, Lanette!!! - worrying about leaving a mess for survivors is exactly what keeps me (and Carol!) up at night. My mom was a wonderful, organized woman, but she and her antique business partner Nancy had a lot of (well-organized) stuff in their shop, 3 storage units, a 2 car garage-full, and the entire back wall of another 2 car garage converted to a great room w/floor to ceiling built-in storage closets. I worked my @$$ off, but finally I ran out of time, so when the movers came, whatever was left came with me to Virginia. Though it was only a fraction of the stuff she had, added to my deceased sister's stuff, a modest amount of stuff from my grandparents, my own belongings, my spouse's, her mother's...well, you get the picture. And I am NOT going to leave that mess to my son. That's a gift I am giving him, though he may never fully recognize it. I am going to go through everything, keep the best of the best, and let the rest go. My spouse is finally getting so disgusted with the box after box after box of her belongings, and those of her mother, that she is becoming much more proactive in deciding to donate or discard items. There has been a big change in just the last week. She is dismayed at how much we have acquired, and sees the joy I am getting from giving things to people, and is starting to get into the spirit of gifting.
Carol, My heart goes out to you and I fully empathize. A former next door neighbor was a collector and some would say a hoarder, though that sounds so negative and judgmental. I wish there was a kinder word. Anyway, her husband died, and she got to the point where she needed to be in an assisted living facility. Their only son traveled back and forth for a year, gradually emptying the house. I do not know if one of the auction houses would have been able to save him from that onerous task, as Lanette has alluded to, but even if it could have been done, I would have been very nervous not knowing what might be found under the piles of stuff.
I am especially keen to find any old diaries and destroy them. My son doesn't need to read anything I wrote about his father when we were married. We are great friends now that we are divorced, and it would do no good for our son to read all that. Water under the bridge.
The attic is completely empty and all of that stuff has been disposed of (at least 150 boxes!); tomorrow Class and Trash will take more than half our furniture which will open up space, and Thursday my house cleaner is going to spend the day with me emptying my storage unit. Most of the storage unit boxes will be arranged on shelving in the (empty) dining room, so I can give up the expense of the storage unit, and go through the boxes in the comfort of my own home, rather than in a storage unit that lacks good lighting & a bathroom, for starters. Plus, it's a little bit spooky to spend hours in a storage facility.
We still have a ton to do - I am dreading the garage and the crawl space, but I know it will all be OK. Once done, I will be free from worrying about it for the rest of my life! I can't wait!
Karen in Virginia
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My appointment with the retina specialist is tomorrow. I've waited for a long time for the this appointment and I hope it will go well. My mother died in 1991 and as her only surviving child I had the job of dealing with all of her stuff. We were fortunate to be able to move into her house, move a lot of stuff into storage and after only ten years were able to get rid of the storage units. Even so, I had many dreams that my mother was alive and finding fault with what I'd done with her things. Tomorrow I'll be creating the new thread for September. Be watching for it.
Barbie in NW WA 4 -
Hi Gals,
Karen – I am with you, I think that the load it lifts to even clean out one small space is so worth it that what you are doing is a gift, to you, to your spouse, to your son, and actually to everyone and every charity that is getting items. Even if you take a global view a gift to the world as less is ending up in landfill, less is being bought and you are a good example to many many people. I have been wondering if your spouse was getting the bug seeing the joy you are getting and are giving to others… I am glad she is – that makes everything easier.
And Carol – if your DH passes before you do – you could work with your child, friends, or someone who does estate sales to clean out the property before you pass.
I’m still working on getting all the things done that need to be done to get Mom’s trust updated, my brother moved out of her home (he’s 56 and has mooched off her for 54 of those years) the house sold and her moved closer – but not with- me. Just to find a trust lawyer to handle her very complicated estate plan means I have learned more than enough to take the trust and estate part of the LSAT. LOL I have interviewed the 4th lawyer and still not a fit… she did not even know some of the things I have learned from trust and estates for dummies…. I am exhausted.
Smiles Kim
in Northern California5 -
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Karen - I love seeing how you are gaining energy from getting rid of the stuff that has been weighing you down. It's amazing how our physical environment affects us so much. I can feel your renewed energy sparking off the page. Fly my friend!
My friend G is moving tomorrow and shedding nearly all the stuff from her York apartment. Yesterday, the neighbours were dragging out nearly new heavy furniture they had purchased from her. Unfortunately, her place near Portsmouth, owned now by her son, has far too much storage - garage and attic, even though it's a one bedroom flat, so her task is not over yet! She easily gets overwhelmed. My amateur diagnosis is ADHD, though she has never seen it like that.
Again, Karen, I am feeling your joy! I don’t care what happens to any of my stuff, apart from my boxes of manuscripts and the old photos. I hope, still, one day, to be a very famous, dead, author, with my archive in the British Library. :laugh: "I have a dream!" I still hope DH will come round about the POA. Grrrr!
Didn't sleep well. Far too excited about the cruise. I still can't actually believe it. So soon! Normally, I have a year to get used to the idea! I'm slightly nervous, in that Saga don't finalise the booking until they've rung you about the medical declaration. It's always my BP meds that hold the booking up. Just procedure.
It's also always me who makes the booking. I did try this time, just to keep things tidy, but because DH had been looking at the only posh cabin left, it wasn't appearing on my laptop. My control freakery is a little anxious, but I am so happy that he took it upon himself to do this. Apparently, he has been turning the idea over for some time, and he knows my savings are rapidly shrinking.
We always say to each other, you never know what tomorrow may bring. Old friends are dying off, some just dropping dead, literally. Just before the cruise, I will be 73 and he, 77. It makes you treasure every moment.
I was so lucky to meet him, when I was 53. It was in the very early days of Internet dating. We have our frustrations, of course, but we both consider ourselves extremely fortunate to have found each other at this stage in our lives. Every day is a bonus and a blessing.
Lots of love to all, especially to Kim at the moment, wrestling with all that legal, and emotional, stuff. At least our wills are made. They are joint, mirror, wills. The survivor could revoke them, but I don't think they'll bother. Oh well, it's only money!
Much love, Heather UK xxxxxxxx
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KetoneKaren wrote: »SophieRosieMom wrote: »Karen in VA ~ I looked up Swedish Death Cleaning and boy how I wish my husband would get aboard with that. It makes me quake to think of all the mess our son will have to deal with once we pass! So bad that I can't sleep thinking about it sometimes. Husband will not voice any opinion about what to do when/if he passes before me so I will be in a pickle when it happens.
Rant:We took over his parent's house when they passed (both died the same night after he had a heart attack and she had one helping him). The house was filled with their furnishings, all the contents of an antique shop they had owned, and all the belongings of both their families that has passed before them. Since moving here, DH spent years and years going to estate sales and added much, much more to the piles. He will not make any effort to dispose of this and it will all be left up to our son!
Carol in Ga
Carol - not sure how things work in Georgia, but around here a person can grab whatever personal items they want then turn the house over to an auction company and let them go thru, price, haul away and sell. Your son might have the option of doing that.
I worry about that a little too.
Karen had good ideas letting Habitat for Humanity or a similar charity come in and do the hard work if your son doesn't need income.
Hard to think about this stuff, but as my attorney said, "don't worry about leaving a mess for the survivors/beneficiaries, let them figure it out."
Lanette
SW WA State
OMG, Lanette!!! - worrying about leaving a mess for survivors is exactly what keeps me (and Carol!) up at night. My mom was a wonderful, organized woman, but she and her antique business partner Nancy had a lot of (well-organized) stuff in their shop, 3 storage units, a 2 car garage-full, and the entire back wall of another 2 car garage converted to a great room w/floor to ceiling built-in storage closets. I worked my @$$ off, but finally I ran out of time, so when the movers came, whatever was left came with me to Virginia. Though it was only a fraction of the stuff she had, added to my deceased sister's stuff, a modest amount of stuff from my grandparents, my own belongings, my spouse's, her mother's...well, you get the picture. And I am NOT going to leave that mess to my son. That's a gift I am giving him, though he may never fully recognize it. I am going to go through everything, keep the best of the best, and let the rest go. My spouse is finally getting so disgusted with the box after box after box of her belongings, and those of her mother, that she is becoming much more proactive in deciding to donate or discard items. There has been a big change in just the last week. She is dismayed at how much we have acquired, and sees the joy I am getting from giving things to people, and is starting to get into the spirit of gifting.
Carol, My heart goes out to you and I fully empathize. A former next door neighbor was a collector and some would say a hoarder, though that sounds so negative and judgmental. I wish there was a kinder word. Anyway, her husband died, and she got to the point where she needed to be in an assisted living facility. Their only son traveled back and forth for a year, gradually emptying the house. I do not know if one of the auction houses would have been able to save him from that onerous task, as Lanette has alluded to, but even if it could have been done, I would have been very nervous not knowing what might be found under the piles of stuff.
I am especially keen to find any old diaries and destroy them. My son doesn't need to read anything I wrote about his father when we were married. We are great friends now that we are divorced, and it would do no good for our son to read all that. Water under the bridge.
The attic is completely empty and all of that stuff has been disposed of (at least 150 boxes!); tomorrow Class and Trash will take more than half our furniture which will open up space, and Thursday my house cleaner is going to spend the day with me emptying my storage unit. Most of the storage unit boxes will be arranged on shelving in the (empty) dining room, so I can give up the expense of the storage unit, and go through the boxes in the comfort of my own home, rather than in a storage unit that lacks good lighting & a bathroom, for starters. Plus, it's a little bit spooky to spend hours in a storage facility.
We still have a ton to do - I am dreading the garage and the crawl space, but I know it will all be OK. Once done, I will be free from worrying about it for the rest of my life! I can't wait!
Karen in Virginia
Both times I've done this, I set up a large folding table so I could spread things out and decide what to do with them in some measure of comfort.
M in Oz1 -
Heather, I lovelovelove what Johnny decided to do. What a wonderful man he is. I understand being frugal and saving for one's dotage, but recognizing when that phase is over and dotage has begun is a difficult transition for many people. I am jumping for joy for you and for Johnny. May this be just the beginning of many more adventures to come!
Thank you for your kind words; I am beginning to experience joy every day, and feeling better & lighter than I have felt for a long time. Today will be an important day as we dispose of over half our furniture. I will take some photos this morning as mementos of this day.
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I am also seeing my brother gaining energy as we discuss getting him into a better situation. I have to be so careful not to overwhelm him. He is vulnerable, and starts shutting down if he feels backed into a corner about anything. He feels backed into a corner about nearly anything that involves brainstorming. He was bullied as a kid, and still has horrible nightmares about being in danger or even killed. He is always victimized in these dreams. I have wondered if EMDR (Eye Movement Desensitization and Retraining) might help him process some of the old traumas. I believe he suffers from a form of PTSD.
I have written letters to both of my brother's former payees asking them to provide me with an accounting of his money, and I am sending copies to the Elder Attorney and to the SSA. I hope that gets their attention. I found out it is a federal felony for a representative payee to mismanage funds, punishable by $250,000 or 10 years in a federal prison. (!!!)
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Kim, I still have much legal stuff to accomplish and your post has reminded me that I need to get it done. I am going to meet with an elder care attorney soon to get some help recovering my brother's social security assets from his former payees. If I like the attorney, I will speak with my spouse about using her to establish trusts, update wills and powers of attorney, etc. My spouse will be elated; she has been after me for a couple of years about updating our legal papers and doing estate planning. I am finally ready to do it.
I am struck by the contrast between you and your brother concerning your mother's assets and your choices about how to survive living in a high cost area of the country. I admire your approach. Not so much your brother's. My oldest brother has always felt resentful about, and entitled to, my mother's rather modest assets. Mom added a codicil to her will instructing her executrix (me) to distribute her remaining assets in such a way that made up for giving 2 of the 4 of us siblings more money while she was alive. Because my brothers were both nearly penniless, and my sister was already dead, I chose to be more generous because I could afford to. It's interesting that my youngest brother wasn't interested or concerned about the distribution of assets at all, but my older brother was suspicious and not so trusting. In any case, I saw to it that his mortgage was paid off and he got his share of the life insurance. So he was mortgage free and had a reasonable chunk of change as a result. I used some of my own money, as well as what he had coming from Mom, to do that. He was still suspicious and untrusting, and later made up a story that I had cut off communication with him. Patently false, but he is always making up stories. I think he has a paranoid personality disorder, so I didn't spend a lot of time trying to convince him of the truth about either Mom's estate distribution or my attempts to communicate with him. No use beating my head against a brick wall. I did the right thing & it doesn't matter to me that he doesn't get it. My conscience is clear.
I'm going to find a copy of Trusts and Estates for Dummies and follow your lead. I hate not being able to grasp legalese. It's about time I added that foreign language to my repertoire.
I see there is Estate & Trust Administration for Dummies also. I may try to find used copies of both.
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Carol, I have been thinking about you a lot because of your worry about what your son may have to deal with at your house. I know you didn't ask for advice, but if I had it to do over again, I would have gone through one box or drawer or shelf a day, devoting 20-30 minutes daily. Just your belongings, or things that are not important to your husband - for me that would be kitchen gadgets, my own books, items I inherited, etc. My stuff.
If your activities draw his attention enough for him to remark on it, you could simply say that you want to start preparing for the future to spare your son as much as possible, at least with the things that are yours to dispose of. Then you could assure him that you are not planning to touch his stuff, and leave it at that. That way, you've planted a seed without it feeling personal to him. I don't know him, so I don't know if my advice sucks, but you've really been on my mind.
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I love all of you! I'll check in this afternoon after Class and Trash have gone.
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Karen in Virginia
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cityjaneLondon wrote: »We always say to each other, you never know what tomorrow may bring.
Much love, Heather UK xxxxxxxx
That's why we decided to do an 8-month "tour" to various parts of the world in 2012.
We packed everything into storage except our bicycles and panniers and set off in June 2012.
Where we went:First stop ... Hong Kong for a few days. Then Taiwan and Japan.
Hop over to Europe where we spent some time in England and Scotland.
Ferry to The Netherlands to cycle the Rhine Route into Germany.
Decided to head for Switzerland but spent a few days in Luxembourg first.
Then down to Perpignan, in France near the border with Spain.
And up to Bordeaux and northward along the coast.
Over to Paris.
Ferry to Portsmouth.
Several days in Plymouth.
Canada next, then 6 weeks through the US all the way down to Florida and back.
Hop over to Hong Kong.
Then to Western Australia.
And back to the eastern side of Australia.
I am so incredibly glad we did that! We had no idea what would happen several years later!!
M in Oz
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Morning ladies
Still stuffy and sneezy but not as bad..
All this talk about packing up houses ,
My Grandparents were antique dealers,my mom a tag sale queen thinking she could find something worth money to resell.. and my dad a depression baby and a paper packrat..
When he passed in Jan of 2018 it took my brother and I ,mostly Sean as I was still working..I took care of the legal stuff ,he did the grunt work..until end of November to clean that house out...
And my condo is less than 800 sq ft and im working on getting rid of stuff..
I vow not to leave my kids the mess my dad left us.. my papers are all in order im working on the book so its easier to get them through it all.1 -
Finished!
2022 Monthly August
Walking/Running Distance (km): 61.7
Walking/Running Time (min): 770.8
Cycling Distance (km): 80.8
Cycling Time (min): 269.2
Flights Stairs Climbed Number: 102.5
Flights Stairs Climbed Time (min): 73.8
Rowing Distance (km): 5.9
Rowing Time (min): 40.5
Other Distance: 0.0
Other Time: 180.0 (gardening and weight-lifting)
Totals
Total Distance (km): 148.3
Total Distance (miles): 92.2
Total Time (min): 1334.3
Total Time (hr): 22:14:15
Machka in Oz2 -
Grandmallie We toured a Loon sanctuary at Lake Winnesquam. We didn't see any loons but enjoyed learning about them and I loved the gift shop! I believe children get a chance to free play at a good children's center and outdoors if their lucky.
RVRita Thinking about you. Hope the medication situation improves
TerriRichardson112 I have a friend I porch sit with. Caretaking has cut into that. I do miss it.
Lisa I hope the medical tests go well
Melanie Hi I had a treadmill in my kitchen for years
Barbiecat Hope the appointment goes well with the retina specialist
The sales rep comes at 10 am this morning to show us how to use an Eye Gaze. This is a fancy device where one can generate speech or send an email by looking at a letter with one's eyes and this formulates words. Means getting my husband up early so he will be ready for the appointment. I am fatigued and very bored with care giving. My brain feels like mush. Very little opportunity to read or work on calligraphy or write. It isn't forever.
Rosemarie from GA
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Rosemarie,
You sound totally compassion-fatigued.
I may have mentioned that my grandfather had ALS.
We lived in a small town without a lot of resources. I realize now the toll it must have taken on my grandmother, though at the time I really didn't get the relentless nature of caretaking someone with ALS.
You're right, it isn't forever. Nonetheless, I wish you had someone to give you a few hours each day to nurture yourself.
I love that you do calligraphy. My best friend from high school and my mom both do/did calligraphy. I remember having a good laugh one day with Mom when she showed me a beautifully done calligraphy project with a misspelled word. I guess when you are using the right brain to create, the left brain might be ignored. She did the same thing with a Christmas ornament; she wrote To: Mom From: Gary and Gaynor instead of vice versa.
Karen in Virginia2 -
Yesterday I had a call from a good friend in Oregon. She has been looking out for our home in Oregon. Her call was a gift3
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Karen - So good to see you posting more again.
Kim - Seriously, you have the patience of a saint regarding your mother and your brother.
Heather - Well done to your DH for knowing the perfect gift to give you! Your ability to live your joy out loud through all the people and activities and things that matter to you is a goal for me. Thanks for all the pics of the family.
Rosemarie - Thank you for the good wishes. As you've probably noticed, we've other caretakers that post in this thread. Some have run the full gamut from the beginning to the end of losing those they love, and some are still in caretaker mode. I hope you find both the support and distraction that you need here.
Rebecca - Thank you for the pic. Watching Athena grow has been one of the many joys I find here.
Barbie - Hope the retina specialist has good news for you.
The air handler (the bit in the attic) on our air conditioner went out Monday night, and the repairman is supposed to be here this morning. On top of that, I also had a spectacularly bad reaction to one of the new medications the gastroenterologist started me on, so was dealing with that fallout most of the morning yesterday after the blood tests. Once I got home and dealt with all that, I just largely stayed in the bedroom, where we have a window air conditioner. Honestly, kinda ready to see August depart at this point. I'll see you all in the September thread.
To reassure y'all, I'm doing fine physically, just tired.
Love y'all,
Lisa in AR4 -
Phoned Saga at 9 am this morning to complete the booking. With DH'S permission, I asked them to make me lead passenger. I'm used to the admin so it makes sense. They did that OK.
We were ready to pay, but DH'S bank refused to put it through. I secured the booking with a deposit on my credit card. DH rang his bank and sorted that out. I then completed the payment for him online. So it's done! Poor DH got very annoyed with the bank and the hassle, but he's OK now. I will let the deposit stand as my small contribution. We forgot to book a designated table for dining, so I've just emailed them. The woman we spoke to was new and not very good. I had to remind her that we hadn't paid yet!
Then couldn't settle to write, so I went out to the doctor and pharmacy. Flu jabs booked. Then charity shop and groceries. All good.
Still excited!
Flea - Does your Belize cruise go through the Panama Canal ?
Love Heather UK xxxxxx2 -
Rosemarie2972 wrote: »The sales rep comes at 10 am this morning to show us how to use an Eye Gaze. This is a fancy device where one can generate speech or send an email by looking at a letter with one's eyes and this formulates words. Means getting my husband up early so he will be ready for the appointment. I am fatigued and very bored with care giving. My brain feels like mush. Very little opportunity to read or work on calligraphy or write. It isn't forever.
Rosemarie from GA
Sounds like you need respite. Do you have resources like that where you are?
I'm also a carer but fortunately my husband can be on his own while I'm at work now. The first year or so after his brain injury, he was either in hospital or had a carer come in while I was at work, but he has made enough of a recovery to be all right at home. The only help I've been offered through the carer organisations here is respite, but that's one thing I don't need yet. I wish I could give you the respite I've been offered.
These days, work is my main break from being a carer. It gives me something else to focus on. And he usually goes to bed about an hour before I do, so I've got a little quiet time on my own.
But there is a lot of work once I get home from work ... legal work, organising things, taking care of things.
I catch moments here and there to spend a bit of time in the garden, to colour, or to walk our cat. Grab the moments when you can.
Because of these legal issues (worker's compensation) we're also confined to our state ... our island. I long to travel, but for 4.5 years now, my travel has been limited to 68,401 km² on the island where we live. But like you say ... it isn't forever.
Meanwhile, slowly but surely, I'm trying to organise and simplify things.
We were told yesterday that in his most recent MRI, there's evidence that my husband has an even greater risk of developing dementia than he would have done with simply a severe TBI. I'd like to try to get our ducks in a row (or at least in the same pond??) before anything like that happens.
Machka in Oz6 -
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Heather, our Belize trip isn't a cruise, and the S America cruise does not go through the Panama canal. I looked at one that does, goes all the way to Antarctica and through the canal , but it is three months and 40,000 per person, so I ruled it out. It went all the way up the Eastern seaboard of the US, as well, and that seemed redundant for us. Even if we did have three months and 40,000 to spare.
Flea
Willamette Valley OR1 -
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Good morning ladies!
I did my dumbbells last night Yay! And my friend challenged me to write a bit so we both did. Yay!
I did some comparison of my main character to three other popular female private investigators. Very interesting to see how the background makes a framework that supports the recurring actions in each series. Mine is original enough, but may need more flaws. They say a woman without flaws is not an interesting character, but it seems like men are: Jack Reacher, James Bond. Hmm. And I think the self-destructive alcoholic detective has been exhausted as a character. I should write a mistake or two into my plot outline.
My mom had a smooth doctor visit yesterday. Sometimes these things go well. Yay!
I took a day off from caregiver duties last Wednesday and spent the night with a friend. I'm lucky I can still do that with minimal risk. I'm making plans to attend a theater festival next summer even though we might need respite care. Being burned out isn't good for anybody. I might have to lean on my cousin, which I hate to do. But she offered.
Anyway life goes on. I have grocery shopping and yoga to do, and I must pay my storage bill online today. I have two storage units full of my furniture. I probably should have sold it years ago, but it helps me to feel like an adult. It's down in central Virginia so it would be a major trip to go work on sorting it. And there's not much that I really want to get rid of. So I just keep paying the storage bill. Someday I will have my own house and my own furniture again. But by then I will likely have my parents' furniture too. Hmm. I wish I had my treadmill back.
Annie in Delaware
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Katla: Think of you often. Feel the waves of love and healing energy I am sending to you and DH. I hope that every day gets better and better for you both.
Rosemarie: I was 24/7 caregiver to my DH who had dementia up until he passed a little over a year ago. I kept a journal and occasionally go back and read all I did and felt while in that bondage. I had a VA sponsored caregiver 10 hours a week, otherwise I did it all. Slept with my shoes on because he wouldn't sleep through the night and I needed to jump up right away when he'd get up at strange hours. I made 3 meals and 4 snacks a day for years, and grew to resent cooking and meal planning so much I still can barely get myself to turn the stove on. Not sure how I survived, but I did. The ladies here were stalwart in their long distance support and you are always free to vent here. Today in retrospect, I see what an honor it was to be able to care for him, at home, and see him transition with dignity and love. Stay strong. Smile at the little things. Take pictures and play your favorite music. (I really got into the powerful songs of Sia when at my wits end). As you said, it's not forever. You, Machka, Beth, Annie and all the other caregivers hold a huge place in my heart and my highest admiration for your daily compassion in the hardest of circumstances. 💜💜💜
Heather: Yay! Bonus cruise means we get to travel along through your always delicious posts and pictures. Belated congratulations on publishing latest installment of your memoirs. It's on my list. As for travelling to England...the friends I am visiting next week in Montana want me to join them on a trip to Scotland in 2023. We will iron out details for that, and I will certainly make it a priority to stop in London as part of that journey.
Meg: Omaha, yes! Is there any concert or theatre event you want to see and can't find a companion? I can be there in about 8 hours.🚗
Karen in VA: My chest swells with pride for you and all you are doing for your loved ones. Your motives are so pure and I think everyone is responding to you positively because they feel the good vibes radiating from your big generous heart. Love you! Keep it up.
Flea: My Hadestown shift was in the lobby, so didn't get to see this show. Not sure I will make it back before the run is over. The bits of music I heard certainly were interesting.
Ladies, happy to report my weight is down even though my exercise discipline seems to have disappeared. Found cobwebs on my kettlebell...ewww. So, today I'm declaring to you that I am heading to the condo gym and will do at least 20 minutes on at least 2 cardio machines. Ready, set, go!
Stay well friends. We can do this.
Rori
Colorado Foothills
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Rori,
Thank you! Love you, too! ...you role model, you...
I have always loved giving gifts to people, especially when I can figure out exactly the right thing. Buy Nothing is fantastic because I have a whole host of potential recipients, and I know for certain that whoever I choose will love their gift. It's a win-win!
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The Class and Trash people are here right now. I am in the family room, staying completely out of the way. I told Lisa where I would be so she can come and get me if she needs me. I figured they didn't need me hovering over them. I took pictures of everything this morning. I'll post a couple of before & after photos later. Some of our furniture items are very heavy, and there are only 2 guys, so there is a possibility that they will leave some items until next week when they can bring a helper. We shall see.
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I have written letters to my brother's 2 former representative payees. My son and ex-husband read and edited the letters and we all agree that they can be posted. Somehow I think it has escaped the former payees' attention that mismanagement of Social Security funds by a payee is a felony punishable by $250,000 or 10 years in federal prison. I have come to understand that it is common practice for representative payees in group homes of disabled people to mismanage funds. It seems shameful to me to take advantage of the people who are the least able to protect their own interests.
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Karen in Virginia7 -
440
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Rita--Sending hugs and prayers. Yesterday my doctor put me on low dose anti-anxiety to see if that helps my panic attacks and help me relax to sleep.
Meg--So glad to see you post. Been thinking of you.
Karen--So happy you and your DB have a chance to work things out and you will be a great help as things keep lining up for him. He is lucky to have you looking out for him and sounds like you have a great support system in place for both of you. Since I have become the payee for my friend that had the stroke and will never live on her own again. Her daughter was her payee the first 3 years and because her mom was on a medicaid she kept the money and when the waiver ran out she told the home she didn't have any money and to figure it out. So I became her POA a arranged for the home to become her payee. I get a statement every month. I turned into social security about the money and they were to check into it, but been a year and no one has done anything. It makes me so mad to think she took her mom's money and thought it was ok.
Heather--What a great suprise. So happy for you.
Allie--Be careful. Call the doctor, with you heart problems don't mess around.
Karen--WOW! You have gotten so much done. I keep trying to do that our son doesn't have to. DH just isn't much help yet.
Barbie--Good Luck with your eye appointment. Pray you get positive news.
Rosemarie--Sending hugs and prayers. Sounds like you are doing all you can. Please see if you can get some respit care to help out a couple hours a day or week. Give you some me time.
Plan to go to the State Fair tonight and listen to a christian concert. It is at 6pm and I get off at 430 so will have to get moving to get out there. Our grandson that is 9 wants to go with us.
Blessings, Vicki GRAND ISLAND, NE 5 -
Vicki- yes had the echocardiogram done.. saw the results ,i dont really know how to read them but im still standing so that's a good thing
Basically flonase is the only thing I can take for allergies. I feel a bit better today. But have tomorrow off from watching Miles so ,im going to pack for my weekend trip and relax ,so some laundry and get the garbage out.0 -
I checked out the one thing I wanted to take DH to see in Barcelona, and, of course, it's closed on Mondays.
There is one other place on my list, and it is open. We have both been before - me for 8 days! I love just wandering about.
Also, in Sète, a lot of the good restaurants are shut on Tuesdays.
I have found a nice one though.
It's annoying when you turn up on a day when the one thing you wanted to see is shut. That has happened to us a few times. I now check before I get my hopes up!
Thinking about losing a few pounds. Again. Easier when you have a good reason.
Edie's game and art stuff turned up today. Lucky girl. Her birthday is later in September, so I've hidden it from her eyes that notice everything.
Plus my thermal top. Need all the help I can get with our prices shooting up.
Love Heather UK xxxxxxxx
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It is already the new day, new month, and new season in Australia so I am posting the new thread for September now.
Here is the link
https://community.myfitnesspal.com/en/discussion/10872855/women-ages-50-for-september-2022/p1?new=13 -
Stats for the day.-
outside bike ride- 1hr 48min 33sec, 344elev, 74aw, 13.9amph, 135ahr, 159mhr, 25.10mi= 930c
Strava app = 534c
Walk home to gym- 11.22min, .53mi= 59c
Strava app = 65c
Elliptical machine- 20min, 2incl, 2resist, 129ahr, 151mhr, 1.58mi= 205c
Walk gym to home-10.58min, .54mi= 68c
Strava app = 67c
Total cal 12622
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