Revolving door MFP-er

coderdan82

Back here again for the upteenth time. This time trying to simplify things to make calorie counting easier.

I was just wondering, has anyone here been able to form a meaningful and genuinely supportive group? The last time I tried making connections it started off with some introductions but then quickly got reduced to just a bunch of notifications on my phone about "likes" and, conversely, me spending a few minutes a day clicking the like button whenever a notification popped up. It felt empty and meaningless. Is it better to meet local people and meet in person? Or do you do Skype calls or something? What's the key to making the group supportive?

Nurse_Christy

I too am here for the umpteenth time. I’m not sure about how to make things better, but I’m going to give it one more try. Feel free to add me.

FeFiFo123

I've personally gave up on trying to assemble a list of interactive and supportive list of friends like I had in years past. I attribute it to a few different reasons, but I may be wrong. The forums are not very active any longer compared to what they used to be years ago.

Wish you luck!

AnnPT77

Consider joining one of the challenges or motivation groups over in one of these parts of the Community:

https://community.myfitnesspal.com/en/categories/challenges
https://community.myfitnesspal.com/en/categories/motivation-and-support

Those tend to be a lot more interactive/supportive. You can read their intro posts, get an idea of how each one works and what the "culture" is like, and maybe join in on one (or more) if it suits you.

I personally get a lot more out of participating in the Community than from the MFP friend side of things, but that may just be me. Now that I'm in maintenance, rather than those things, I participate in a sort of exercise accountability thread (there are several), and in some long-running threads that are age group or food category focused. That works for me. (I can be more specific about linking some of those if anyone cares.)

SafariGalNYC

coderdan82 wrote: »

Back here again for the upteenth time. This time trying to simplify things to make calorie counting easier.

I was just wondering, has anyone here been able to form a meaningful and genuinely supportive group? The last time I tried making connections it started off with some introductions but then quickly got reduced to just a bunch of notifications on my phone about "likes" and, conversely, me spending a few minutes a day clicking the like button whenever a notification popped up. It felt empty and meaningless. Is it better to meet local people and meet in person? Or do you do Skype calls or something? What's the key to making the group supportive?

FeFiFo123 wrote: »

I've personally gave up on trying to assemble a list of interactive and supportive list of friends like I had in years past. I attribute it to a few different reasons, but I may be wrong. The forums are not very active any longer compared to what they used to be years ago.

Wish you luck!

@coderdan82 I’ve been on MFP - off an on about 10 years. I was lucky to find a little beehive of really awesome friends that have also become friends outside of MFP!

Sometimes .. we become “friends” with people who may not be so active or are just serial “likers” - I’ve found it’s just a process of weeding out who is the best fit for ya. They exist!

I also echo @AnnPT77 ’s idea- there are a few challenges here that are cool and supportive. Happy to cheer you on! I like the UAC challenge - really cool people that invest their time there.

@FeFiFo123 I agree the boards are not as active as years past.. I’ve always wondered why that is.. think it’s just life changed post pandemic? There is a lot of noise out there. Thoughts?

ninerbuff

Join my TLFC thread. Post there EVERYDAY since I've started and you can ask me anything there regarding fitness and weight loss.


A.C.E. Certified Personal and Group Fitness Trainer
IDEA Fitness member
Kickboxing Certified Instructor
Been in fitness for 35+ years and have studied kinesiology and nutrition

coderdan82

Nurse_Christy wrote: »

I too am here for the umpteenth time. I’m not sure about how to make things better, but I’m going to give it one more try. Feel free to add me.

They say the definition of insanity is doing the same thing over and over again and expecting a different result. I'd rather think the upteenth time is the charm

coderdan82

FeFiFo123 wrote: »

I've personally gave up on trying to assemble a list of interactive and supportive list of friends like I had in years past. I attribute it to a few different reasons, but I may be wrong. The forums are not very active any longer compared to what they used to be years ago.

Wish you luck!

I did notice it's a lot more quiet

coderdan82

AnnPT77 wrote: »

Consider joining one of the challenges or motivation groups over in one of these parts of the Community:

https://community.myfitnesspal.com/en/categories/challenges
https://community.myfitnesspal.com/en/categories/motivation-and-support

Those tend to be a lot more interactive/supportive. You can read their intro posts, get an idea of how each one works and what the "culture" is like, and maybe join in on one (or more) if it suits you.

I personally get a lot more out of participating in the Community than from the MFP friend side of things, but that may just be me. Now that I'm in maintenance, rather than those things, I participate in a sort of exercise accountability thread (there are several), and in some long-running threads that are age group or food category focused. That works for me. (I can be more specific about linking some of those if anyone cares.)

Thanks, I'll check it out

coderdan82

SafariGalNYC wrote: »

coderdan82 wrote: »

Back here again for the upteenth time. This time trying to simplify things to make calorie counting easier.

I was just wondering, has anyone here been able to form a meaningful and genuinely supportive group? The last time I tried making connections it started off with some introductions but then quickly got reduced to just a bunch of notifications on my phone about "likes" and, conversely, me spending a few minutes a day clicking the like button whenever a notification popped up. It felt empty and meaningless. Is it better to meet local people and meet in person? Or do you do Skype calls or something? What's the key to making the group supportive?

FeFiFo123 wrote: »

I've personally gave up on trying to assemble a list of interactive and supportive list of friends like I had in years past. I attribute it to a few different reasons, but I may be wrong. The forums are not very active any longer compared to what they used to be years ago.

Wish you luck!

@coderdan82 I’ve been on MFP - off an on about 10 years. I was lucky to find a little beehive of really awesome friends that have also become friends outside of MFP!

Sometimes .. we become “friends” with people who may not be so active or are just serial “likers” - I’ve found it’s just a process of weeding out who is the best fit for ya. They exist!

I also echo @AnnPT77 ’s idea- there are a few challenges here that are cool and supportive. Happy to cheer you on! I like the UAC challenge - really cool people that invest their time there.

@FeFiFo123 I agree the boards are not as active as years past.. I’ve always wondered why that is.. think it’s just life changed post pandemic? There is a lot of noise out there. Thoughts?

Yup, it kind of feels like fishing or throwing darts randomly.

I'll check out the challenges.

coderdan82

ninerbuff wrote: »

Join my TLFC thread. Post there EVERYDAY since I've started and you can ask me anything there regarding fitness and weight loss.


A.C.E. Certified Personal and Group Fitness Trainer
IDEA Fitness member
Kickboxing Certified Instructor
Been in fitness for 35+ years and have studied kinesiology and nutrition

What's a TLFC thread?

chris_in_cal

-

AnnPT77

coderdan82 wrote: »

Nurse_Christy wrote: »

I too am here for the umpteenth time. I’m not sure about how to make things better, but I’m going to give it one more try. Feel free to add me.

They say the definition of insanity is doing the same thing over and over again and expecting a different result. I'd rather think the upteenth time is the charm

Or . . . it's time to take a little different approach?

A lot of people seem to arrive here with a "lose weight fast" mindset, and speak as if it's a project with an end date, after which things will go back to normal. Sometimes that even means restrictive eating rules, named diets, punitively intense and impractical exercise schedules.

That "lose fast, then back to normal" thing tends to be a revolving door, just from observation over the time I've been on MFP (a little over 8 years, loss then maintenance). It's not exactly what it seems like most of the long-term successful MFP-ers have done.

For someone like me, who has a tendency to become overweight, weight management is a forever endeavor, not a temporary project.

That, to my mind, puts a priority on finding strategies one can continue long term, relatively easily - almost on autopilot - and be relatively happy doing that. To me, that means the weight loss phase is sort of a grown-up, productive science fair experiment: Try things out, find the changes in routine habits that will allow weight management to happen without a lot of willpower, motivation, etc., then practice the habits until they stick.

Exactly what that is will differ from one person to the next, since we all have different preferences, strengths, limitations, etc.

AnnPT77

coderdan82 wrote: »

ninerbuff wrote: »

Join my TLFC thread. Post there EVERYDAY since I've started and you can ask me anything there regarding fitness and weight loss.


A.C.E. Certified Personal and Group Fitness Trainer
IDEA Fitness member
Kickboxing Certified Instructor
Been in fitness for 35+ years and have studied kinesiology and nutrition

What's a TLFC thread?

He means this one:

https://community.myfitnesspal.com/en/discussion/331789/tlfc-exercise-and-accountability-support#latest

There are others somewhat similar, like:

https://community.myfitnesspal.com/en/discussion/10705619/what-was-your-work-out-today#latest
https://community.myfitnesspal.com/en/discussion/10796095/what-youtube-workout-did-you-do-today#latest

chris_in_cal

"coderdan82 wrote:

Thanks, I'll check it out

Hey @coderdan82 MFP has three main "Social" parts

1) Newsfeed
2) Community (threads)
3) Groups

#1 is easy to find and shows up in real-time for all users. It's a default first screen. It is just you, and whoever else you have friended.

#2 is ADHD-tastic, continuous stream of easy to lose content. As a workaround there are some named "monthly" or "challenge" threads that people stick with for a bit. Using the 'bookmark' feature is your friend here.

#3 MFP groups are horrible. A tiny fraction are good. But it is an infinity of zombie groups that are created, abandoned, and sit forlorn and unloved for all time. The whole MFP group feature barely has a pulse. Some people find this niche and stick it out. To find the vital groups from the 10000 zombie groups isn't easy. And they never go away, just sit there with a 2007 final post "hey any zoomba fans in here?" If MFP wiped out all groups that have been abandoned for more than a month 99% of them would disappear.

I do a tiny bit of #1, liking a friends post here and there.

In #2 I found a monthly thread that's really been working well for me (on running)

And in #3 I love my tiny "Weekly Weigh Ins" group. It's just the right amount of accountability and support, without all the noise and fluff in #2

coderdan82

AnnPT77 wrote: »

coderdan82 wrote: »

Nurse_Christy wrote: »

I too am here for the umpteenth time. I’m not sure about how to make things better, but I’m going to give it one more try. Feel free to add me.

They say the definition of insanity is doing the same thing over and over again and expecting a different result. I'd rather think the upteenth time is the charm

Or . . . it's time to take a little different approach?

A lot of people seem to arrive here with a "lose weight fast" mindset, and speak as if it's a project with an end date, after which things will go back to normal. Sometimes that even means restrictive eating rules, named diets, punitively intense and impractical exercise schedules.

That "lose fast, then back to normal" thing tends to be a revolving door, just from observation over the time I've been on MFP (a little over 8 years, loss then maintenance). It's not exactly what it seems like most of the long-term successful MFP-ers have done.

For someone like me, who has a tendency to become overweight, weight management is a forever endeavor, not a temporary project.

That, to my mind, puts a priority on finding strategies one can continue long term, relatively easily - almost on autopilot - and be relatively happy doing that. To me, that means the weight loss phase is sort of a grown-up, productive science fair experiment: Try things out, find the changes in routine habits that will allow weight management to happen without a lot of willpower, motivation, etc., then practice the habits until they stick.

Exactly what that is will differ from one person to the next, since we all have different preferences, strengths, limitations, etc.

A lot of good insight here. And you're right, it's time to change the approach. I think my problem before was that I was overcomplicating things while trying to do everything perfectly. I've learned a few lessons from that and the approach I'm taking now should be easier to stick to (fingers crossed).

coderdan82

AnnPT77 wrote: »

coderdan82 wrote: »

ninerbuff wrote: »

Join my TLFC thread. Post there EVERYDAY since I've started and you can ask me anything there regarding fitness and weight loss.


A.C.E. Certified Personal and Group Fitness Trainer
IDEA Fitness member
Kickboxing Certified Instructor
Been in fitness for 35+ years and have studied kinesiology and nutrition

What's a TLFC thread?

He means this one:

https://community.myfitnesspal.com/en/discussion/331789/tlfc-exercise-and-accountability-support#latest

There are others somewhat similar, like:

https://community.myfitnesspal.com/en/discussion/10705619/what-was-your-work-out-today#latest
https://community.myfitnesspal.com/en/discussion/10796095/what-youtube-workout-did-you-do-today#latest

Thanks. This looks pretty cool.

coderdan82

chris_in_cal wrote: »

"coderdan82 wrote:

Thanks, I'll check it out

Hey @coderdan82 MFP has three main "Social" parts

1) Newsfeed
2) Community (threads)
3) Groups

#1 is easy to find and shows up in real-time for all users. It's a default first screen. It is just you, and whoever else you have friended.

#2 is ADHD-tastic, continuous stream of easy to lose content. As a workaround there are some named "monthly" or "challenge" threads that people stick with for a bit. Using the 'bookmark' feature is your friend here.

#3 MFP groups are horrible. A tiny fraction are good. But it is an infinity of zombie groups that are created, abandoned, and sit forlorn and unloved for all time. The whole MFP group feature barely has a pulse. Some people find this niche and stick it out. To find the vital groups from the 10000 zombie groups isn't easy. And they never go away, just sit there with a 2007 final post "hey any zoomba fans in here?" If MFP wiped out all groups that have been abandoned for more than a month 99% of them would disappear.

I do a tiny bit of #1, liking a friends post here and there.

In #2 I found a monthly thread that's really been working well for me (on running)

And in #3 I love my tiny "Weekly Weigh Ins" group. It's just the right amount of accountability and support, without all the noise and fluff in #2

Um, why did you repost?

AnnPT77

coderdan82 wrote: »

AnnPT77 wrote: »

coderdan82 wrote: »

Nurse_Christy wrote: »

I too am here for the umpteenth time. I’m not sure about how to make things better, but I’m going to give it one more try. Feel free to add me.

They say the definition of insanity is doing the same thing over and over again and expecting a different result. I'd rather think the upteenth time is the charm

Or . . . it's time to take a little different approach?

A lot of people seem to arrive here with a "lose weight fast" mindset, and speak as if it's a project with an end date, after which things will go back to normal. Sometimes that even means restrictive eating rules, named diets, punitively intense and impractical exercise schedules.

That "lose fast, then back to normal" thing tends to be a revolving door, just from observation over the time I've been on MFP (a little over 8 years, loss then maintenance). It's not exactly what it seems like most of the long-term successful MFP-ers have done.

For someone like me, who has a tendency to become overweight, weight management is a forever endeavor, not a temporary project.

That, to my mind, puts a priority on finding strategies one can continue long term, relatively easily - almost on autopilot - and be relatively happy doing that. To me, that means the weight loss phase is sort of a grown-up, productive science fair experiment: Try things out, find the changes in routine habits that will allow weight management to happen without a lot of willpower, motivation, etc., then practice the habits until they stick.

Exactly what that is will differ from one person to the next, since we all have different preferences, strengths, limitations, etc.

A lot of good insight here. And you're right, it's time to change the approach. I think my problem before was that I was overcomplicating things while trying to do everything perfectly. I've learned a few lessons from that and the approach I'm taking now should be easier to stick to (fingers crossed).

Maybe not so much "fingers crossed", but "if it turns out not to be easier, analyze why, tweak the approach to improve the tactics, keep going". If you keep trying stuff until you find the right tactics, you'll succeed.

You don't even have to be perfect every day: Pretty good, the majority of the time, on average - that will work out OK.

chris_in_cal

coderdan82 wrote: »

Um, why did you repost?

Technical difficulties editing 'category' to 'community'

coderdan82

AnnPT77 wrote: »

coderdan82 wrote: »

AnnPT77 wrote: »

coderdan82 wrote: »

Nurse_Christy wrote: »

I too am here for the umpteenth time. I’m not sure about how to make things better, but I’m going to give it one more try. Feel free to add me.

They say the definition of insanity is doing the same thing over and over again and expecting a different result. I'd rather think the upteenth time is the charm

Or . . . it's time to take a little different approach?

A lot of people seem to arrive here with a "lose weight fast" mindset, and speak as if it's a project with an end date, after which things will go back to normal. Sometimes that even means restrictive eating rules, named diets, punitively intense and impractical exercise schedules.

That "lose fast, then back to normal" thing tends to be a revolving door, just from observation over the time I've been on MFP (a little over 8 years, loss then maintenance). It's not exactly what it seems like most of the long-term successful MFP-ers have done.

For someone like me, who has a tendency to become overweight, weight management is a forever endeavor, not a temporary project.

That, to my mind, puts a priority on finding strategies one can continue long term, relatively easily - almost on autopilot - and be relatively happy doing that. To me, that means the weight loss phase is sort of a grown-up, productive science fair experiment: Try things out, find the changes in routine habits that will allow weight management to happen without a lot of willpower, motivation, etc., then practice the habits until they stick.

Exactly what that is will differ from one person to the next, since we all have different preferences, strengths, limitations, etc.

A lot of good insight here. And you're right, it's time to change the approach. I think my problem before was that I was overcomplicating things while trying to do everything perfectly. I've learned a few lessons from that and the approach I'm taking now should be easier to stick to (fingers crossed).

Maybe not so much "fingers crossed", but "if it turns out not to be easier, analyze why, tweak the approach to improve the tactics, keep going". If you keep trying stuff until you find the right tactics, you'll succeed.

You don't even have to be perfect every day: Pretty good, the majority of the time, on average - that will work out OK.

You're totally right. There's definitely a learning process to this.