WOMEN AGES 50+ FOR APRIL 2024
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Had a nice Easter. Jess is a good hostess. She thinks she might have found a home for Eva (the other dog, the one Marnie had Jess watch “for a few days” which turned into a few months). There’s a lady in SC who seems very interested. Jess told her all of Eva’s faults (her anxiety, etc) and the lady is quite interested. She just wants to be sure that Eva will get along with her dog, which I think will happen, Eva is very social. The lady told Jess that as long as the dogs get along, Jess should bring the crate and all of Eva’s things when Jess goes there next weekend.
April – I’m so sorry about your son and your father. Take care of yourself, too. Be sure to really stretch your legs after walking. I found out the hard way. But good for you increasing your walking
In one sense, I was sorry to be away this weekend. The weather was so nice, I would have liked to have gotten the pool cover off. Looks like the next possible day will be this coming Sunday. Did wash and wax my car, tho
Did do walking this weekend, tho. Sunday both dogs got an hours walk each. Today Jess took Eva to work with her and I took Ganon for an hour walk. I think it’s just too much for Colby to have both dogs at home, so Jess takes Eva to work and leaves her in the kennel there. This morning I said good by to her and told her to have a good life. If something happens and this lady doesn’t take her, Jess has decided that Eva will need to be put down. She just is getting more and more anxious, there are too many behavioral problems emerging, not only with Eva but then also for Ganon.
Eating has NOT been good. Jess doesn’t have a whole lot of decent things. But I did buy a container of Cottage cheese. I had some for breakfast today and yesterday. I do find that high protein keeps me full a lot. I’ve really known this for a long time, I always have eggs or something like that before we go to FL and I really don’t want to stop for lunch. Vince usually does, but then again he usually has cereal for breakfast
Vince was talking that perhaps in June we’d get more cats. We’ll be going to DE and PA the end of May/beginning of June so after that since you really should be home when you first get the cat(s)
Rita – sending love and hugs from NC to NM
Barbara – thank goodness you found your wallet. Wonder how many calories you burned worrying? I know when I am afraid I lost something, my heartrate goes thru the roof
Jess had me plant onion seeds. I think she is hoping that I’d get interested in gardening. Not going to happen. I just told her “they probably won’t grow since I’m the one who planted them”
Annie – I’m so sorry about your dad. How frustrating, for you AND him. How wonderful that you can go to LV. You sure do have your hands full!
Easter dinner: Jess made a ham and canned corn (I didn’t have any). I made macaroni & cheese (Jess likes it, Vince won’t eat it and I can only eat so much), I also made a hash brown casserole, a chocolate cake and an apple pie
Rori – happy Easter to you and Mars. Mars looks so cute. Love what you’ve done. I know there’s no way on this green earth you could ever have gotten him to wear a hat and bow.
Emailed Bryan to say that I was sorry I hadn’t gotten back to him because we were in Florida and then I had a problem with my eyes. Got some more pics of Leo but not a question as to what was wrong with my eyes or how they are now. Oh well….. I also tried to send him an Easter ecard but got a message saying that the recipient will not accept ecards. So I just sent him an email
Heather – glad John had such a good day with his daughter
Debbie – What a pain that the temp crown came off. One of the reasons I’m not brushing my teeth hard on the left side of my mouth or using the water pick until I get the permanent crown in is that I’m afraid the temp. will come out. When can you get it put back in?
Carol – best of luck to you getting things in order from BIL
Joy – I have very dense breasts. I also have a tendency to benign cysts because of the dense breasts. How many mammos and ultrasounds I’ve had and fortunately not one has shown anything other than a benign cyst
Allie – the ONLY time I ever have Gatorade is when I have to drink that stuff.
Barbara – I truly believe that one of the reasons Vince has so many health problems is because he keeps a lot bottled up. Me? I’m just the opposite.
Sue WA – hug for you. Can’t wait for Toxic to be gone, you deserve so much more
Michele NC
The preying mantis I picked up today
Jess' other birthday present that I made her. I told her to use this dish but she wants to display it
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Heather - I 100% agree that funeral homes charge so much. I also think it’s not necessary for the viewing, the people I talked about didn’t want anything at all, not even a celebration of life. I believe that those left need something to remember and honour their loved one. I learned a lot about my Dad from his friends and family that attended, it was so nice to learn about him from a different angle.
I am very interested in MAID here in Canada. I think that quality overrides quantity when it comes to life.
I hope the Grands are not too tiring for you today.
The paintings are beautiful!
Kylia - it must be difficult that your daughters aren’t getting along. Maybe your house could be neutral and a feud free zone.
I too am a hugger and touchy person, but I know who in my circle really doesn’t want touched or hugged.
Lisa - I loved doing the gallery wall, I’m quite happy with it now that I made a couple of small changes.
Annie - I have a terrible time at resisting lately, I used to be better at it. I think I’m not eating as healthy as I was, so I’m always looking for something to satisfy me.
Margaret - lovely photo.
Rita - I’m so glad you found what may be causing the higher anxiety. I used to watch 911 all the time, I need to get back to it. I’ve heard of the “living funerals” I think that is awesome.
A friend’s story regarding medication:
Trigger warning so I’ll put in a spoiler.My friend started a new medication for fibromyalgia in February 2020, she was to have a follow up appointment in a month, but Covid hit and everything, including her doctors office shut down. She didn’t see a doctor again until April, but it was a video appointment and the main thing they discussed was a spot on her nose that turned out to be skin cancer. In June she had surgery that required a lot of plastic surgery afterwards to rebuild her nose. She was depressed and chalked it up to Covid restrictions and her surgery.
In October of that year they found out they needed to bring her MIL out to live with them, the MIL was terrible, called her names, threatened her, etc. Her husband didn’t believe his mother was being this bad. She ended up spending most of her days in the bedroom so that she didn’t have to interact with her. I was growing very concerned and invited her to come stay with us. I felt no one was paying attention to her.
In January of 2021 she ended up attempting suicide, when she was finally given the help she so needed it was found that the medication she had started almost a year before had suicidal ideation as a side effect. She never even thought about that, she had so many other things going on that she thought that was causing all of her thoughts and actions. Medication is nothing to play around with. As soon as the medicine was removed (slowly, she couldn’t stop it cold turkey) she was able to handle all of the other stuff that had been happening.
Linda - sounds like an eventful Easter!
Joy - I hope your daughter has a positive result from the tests. I had to have a lump removed when I was in my early 20’s, the stress of waiting for the result was hard to deal with.
Barbara - why music in the crawl space?
Sue - how terrible! I hope you fell better soon. That tenant needs to get out soon. Does your lawyer have any advice on how to do it?
Ginny - you are so right about the differing work schedules. This year hasn’t been as bad as last year when he worked nights and I was working days and nothing has been as bad as when he drove truck but it’s still been hard to stay connected this year. Although I have to say the last few days have been better.
I hope you don’t have to use your “go bag.”
Michele - pretty ceramics.
I have a tough assignment this week. I have to partner with a classmate that the instructor chose, we need to have a one minute conversation using only ASL. We are meeting after class tomorrow to write our script, we present on Friday and it’s worth 50% of our mark. I think that online courses should have any assignments that rely on a partner. It seems unfair, we don’t know each other, have only met in person once. Just strange to me.
I coloured my hair tonight, and am now watching American Idol and then The Voice.
Tracey in Edmonton6 -
Have always felt connected to hubby from the time we met at 20/21 years of age. Got married at 21 and now just about 74 years old so 53 years married.
Joy
WOW ... congratulations!
And I hope your daughter will be all right.Machka I ached when I read your post about not talking about your feelings. For many/most of us saying how we feel is one step in processing them. Keeping them inside can be corrosive. That having been said, there is no way I mean to force you to speak your feelings or even “feel” some. We are all different pixels on the prism. ((gentle virtual hugs from outside your personal space :> ))
Barbara
I've rarely had anyone I could talk to, and now I have no one. My family has their own troubles and I have no close friends.
((gentle virtual hugs from outside your personal space :> )) ... I smiled at this because it reminded me ... there were a group of ladies where I worked in Victoria (Australia) and we went out to lunch and did a few things together. One in particular was very huggy. One of our other work colleagues passed away and we went to his funeral. After the funeral, the 4 of us went out to a dark and quiet pub and got talking about all sorts of things, and the subject of hugging came up during which time I mentioned my aversion. After that, she still hugged me, but always warned me about the incoming hug. There have been a few times over the past 6 years I have wished I could hug her again.Ps to Machka, it would creep me out, too, if strangers touched my hair. Eeuww!
I've heard pregnant women comment about strangers coming up and touching their abdomens ... like they have the right to rub a pregnant woman's abdomen. The pregnant women don't like it. The hair situation is similar. I've been walking along and all of a sudden there's someone kind of beside/behind me stroking my hair!!! Thankfully, COVID seems to have put a stop to that.
M in Oz3 -
I have been watching 911 this past week due to my not being able to do much. I have discovered that the anxiety/dizziness is being caused by a medication that was increased about 2 weeks ago. I am now detoxing from that and feel better but not quite there. Back to 911, on one episode they had an accident involving a funeral, however, they were having a ‘Living funeral.’ The person who was dying from cancer had a ‘funeral’ while still alive, to say goodbye to family while still alive. In thinking about it, this sounds like an interesting way to do it. In the end she still died from the cancer, not the accident but the funeral had already been done. Just an interesting thing to think about.
RVRita
I'm glad you've discovered that!
The past few days I have not been well, and one of the days, I was super dizzy and shaky. Plus my tinnitus was screaming loud. That night I was taking my vitamins etc. and suddenly realised I had not taken my Effexor!
Those meds we're on have quite an effect!
M in Oz4 -
RAIN!!
In the last 13 or 14 hours, we have had the 10 mm in the image below plus another 11 mm that hasn't been added to the first 10 mm yet. 😃 And it is still raining!!
But have a look at how dry it has been leading up to this!!
Everything is brown and dusty here with bushfires popping up here and there.
Machka in Oz
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For whoever is interested ...
These are the main Brain Injury websites I referred to in the beginning after my husband's Severe Traumatic Brain Injury. They were very helpful and informative.Brain Injury Australia
https://www.braininjuryaustralia.org.au/
Synapse – good fact sheets
https://synapse.org.au/
Brain Link - Victoria
http://www.brainlink.org.au/
Headway (UK) – lots of good fact sheets
https://www.headway.org.uk/
Brain Injury Canada
https://www.braininjurycanada.ca/
Brainstreams.ca – British Columbia
http://www.brainstreams.ca/
Brain Injury Association of America
https://www.biausa.org/
Brainline – several good blogs written by survivors and caregivers
https://www.brainline.org/
International Brain Injury Association
https://www.internationalbrain.org/
MSKTC – TBI – somewhat more technical information
https://msktc.org/tbi
Machka in Oz2 -
Sue- I hope the tenant from H*** moves out soon. I also hope my mom doesn't end up with problems like that when she finally tells that woman that is living in her home she needs to leave.
Allie- Still saying lots of prayers for your daughter, her family and especially those two new grandbabies that are coming.
Ginny- Thanks- Yes, it is very hard on dh ,not only because he is her son but also because there is no one else left.
Lynette- I would love a second chance with former hubby but that is not in the cards. He has married again(third one, second died from cancer).
Michele-
I was very careful to not floss or eat on that side and the thing came off while I was eating a super soft/moist piece of cake. I need to start using the antibiotic rinse again. Getting a little sore in my mouth. I go in next Tuesday to have the permanant one put in, unless it comes in before that and they will call me if they can get me in sooner. If my mouth gets any sorer, I will call and let them know. She had said if it came off soon after getting it, to call in, but, if it was later/closer to my appointment, not to worry about it.
Weather was beyond amazing today.
It was 75 when I was driving to class at 6:00Pm tonight. Had to have the windows all open and fans on right after class started. Lately we have all been bundled up and take off a layer after every song or two.
Took the menu from Meals on Wheels and told MIL that I filled out the forms for her.
I told her because she doesn't want to cook and doesn't like my cooking, and she told dh she was going to have a friend take her to sign up(friend was going to sign her up months ago but never did).
She said she never said she didn't like my cooking and she never threw it away. I told her I didn't believe her. I know dh exagerates a lot but not totally on that. She got really quiet when I caller her out on it.
I then explained how the MOW works- she doesn't get to pick what she wants each day like she told dh she got to do(kept saying he was a liar and didn't know what he was talking about). I just told her we were signing her up and she would try it for one month and then decide if she wanted to continue getting it. It is about $100 a month for it.
So, tonight, dh took some of the left over salmon, asparagus and chocolate cake and she ate all of it.
Debbie
Napa Valley,Ca6 -
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🤗🤗🤗 and 🙏🏻🙏🏻🙏🏻 for those who need them..
🙋♀️ Miele failte to the newbies.
☘️ Terri3 -
I started the day, v early, by emailing the sweet physio at the injury clinic, asking if she could change her wording a little in the letter for the insurance. They don't like you to have the condition when you book. I booked this cruise around a year ago!
Then, just before breakfast, I emailed Saga, stating that I was getting my medical documentation together, but the Easter holidays had caused a delay.
Then, just now, I rang the surgeon's secretary to enquire about his letter. She explained he had sent her a whole bunch of dictations all at once, so she had them all to do. I praised the fact that she had resisted coming in over Easter to do them.
She said also that she would start to look at dates this week.
So, all I have left to remind is my useless doctor's practice. I will visit them today with the official form, as they haven't responded to my written request for a letter. I've got to print out the form first.
So, after a difficult night's sleep, I feel better for being proactive.
I'm still a bit high from our lovely morning with the grandchildren. All on good form. Edie said, "I wish I could do something to help you." I explained that they were more help than anything on earth to me, keeping my spirits up.
The girls are coming over on Friday afternoon for a few hours.
During our session yesterday, Bea looked up and said, "Oh, I forgot we were in our house! I thought we were at yours! I didn't know where I was!"
Love Heather UK xxxxxxxx
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Michele-hope thing work out for Eva.
Machka-I can't remember-do you journal?. While it is not exactly the same as talking to another it does help with feeling expression. My husband missed his antidepressant several days in a row and found himself feeling suicidal-important to stay on top of meds.
Debbie-it sounds like you very calmly explained options to MIL (rather than arguing the point with her). Sometimes calling people on their stuff is most effective. It may be the best way to break the crazy making cycle,
No strong storms yet-looks lik a band is moving through. Going to try to get stretches and shower before thunder and lightening hit. Predicted it may be worse this afternoon. I will work from home until around 9:30 then have a meeting in town. Will go into office then even though it is a work from home day. Hopefully nothing really hits until after 4:30 so staff can get home.
Take care all,
Ginny in Ohio5 -
To add to Machka's list, here is an article from the bbc today, about the link between brain injury and depression.
https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/health-68557769
Love Heather UK xxxxxxxx3 -
Good morning ladies!
I have to go out in the rain today, hope it isn't too bad. I'm picking up new glasses, and taking my dad to physical therapy. I'm putting off groceries until tomorrow, so I hope I can put something together for Dad's supper. Hmm, there is always frozen pizza. But it's hard for me to watch him eat it.
Hmm. I don't have to pick up my glasses yet if I don't want to. It would be better for me to study a bit. Actually the more urgent task is to get the trash to the curb. My dad used to do that, so I don't think about it much. He emptied the dishwasher last night. He can barely hobble around, but he wants to be useful.
I need to send a deposit for this Las Vegas trip in October. My friend suggested Venmo, and I asked about mailing a check. I really resist signing up for new apps. Have you tried Venmo? Did it result in a flurry of advertising? Security troubles?
So it's a day of small chores, and minor concerns for me.
Have a fabulous day, my friends! May you be happy, healthy, safe and free!
Annie in Delaware
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Morning all
Well I got the dreaded stuff down and will hop in the shower in a bit..
It wasn't to bad but i just want it over.4 -
Machka-I can't remember-do you journal?. While it is not exactly the same as talking to another it does help with feeling expression. My husband missed his antidepressant several days in a row and found himself feeling suicidal-important to stay on top of meds.
Ginny in Ohio
This was the third time in 6 years I've missed a dose. First time, I was royally cranky and felt really unwell. Missed 3 days that time. The second time I forgot to bring them when we went away for a weekend, but I got lots of sleep so it wasn't too bad. Missed 2 days. This time I missed 1 day. It is very important not to miss doses!
I don't journal ... never have. I've tried once or twice but just cannot be bothered. I'm more inclined to try to solve the problem than deal with the emotions the problems are creating.
For example, I went to a carer's get together some time ago, and they were talking about dealing with the emotions that can come up caring for people. The example was given about feeling angry when the person being cared for can do the dishes but doesn't do the dishes and the carer is left to do everything. The focus was on how to deal with the anger. My response was ... buy a dishwasher! Solve the problem.
So when I feel something, 1) I ask myself why I am feeling that way, and 2) I try to figure out how to solve it. Usually. It doesn't always work that way.
M in Oz
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Machka I don't express my feelings at home. My dad is just difficult to talk to; his hearing is bad, he forgets what I say, and he thinks of me as a little girl. And his generation doesn't believe in feelings. Most of our conversations are about getting through the day's errands. So this forum is a great release for me.
And I recently started journaling, as part of my diet journey. I feel awkward about having a written record of my thoughts, but it feels good to actually do the writing. I haven't gotten into anything personal and I probably won't. But just expressing myself feels good and helps me focus on the day's diet lesson.
Annie in Delaware5 -
HI all,
Thank you for keeping things moving into this fresh new month, Barbie.
My cat has come as the bringer of death to my little spider plant spuds. I got some cuttings from my dad's gorgeous plant and was excited to try potting them, but my cat decided it was personal salad and tore them up. She is overly interested in houseplants. She shredded my cat grass offering and expanded her eye to other options. I'll have to figure out a way to manage the spider plant and keep it out of reach from her
Snowflake was talking about hair. My mom was always critical about my choice not to try and cover gray. She, to the day she passed, dyed her hair dark brown. It wasn't subtle, but was her preferred approach. I am light brown, dark blond and while the gray at my temples is obvious, now, the rest is not so abrupt within my regular hair. I want to own my age without misgivings. She had hang-ups that made her self conscious and unhappy. If I can fight absorbing those mindsets, I will fight to be kinder to myself than she was to herself. But I have had fun with coloring my hair. I do recognize it is as a way that people express themselves and their style. I support people making a choice to color and they don't have to justify.
I'm plateaued on weight loss at the moment. I'm trying to stay firm in my practices because my measurements are still shrinking. I am not shocked. I've lost a goodly amount since January. I was overdue. Or, I was just bad the last few weeks while dealing with Dad and as I focus it will shake loose, again.
Love my dad, but back in November we had an appointment for his hearing and got a lecture about not doing needed care for the hearing aids. They showed him how to do things and I assumed he was doing the tasks...but he's been bad about wearing them, again. When I asked about the care regime I found out he didn't do any of the needed once-month practices. I showed him what to do and put a reminder on his phone. He's not dumb or out of it all the time, but he has gotten flakey about some basic items.
Stay strong my fitnesspal comrades. Thank you for having a place to find solidarity and support.
-Anna in Michigan10 -
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Anniesquats100 wrote: »Machka I don't express my feelings at home. My dad is just difficult to talk to; his hearing is bad, he forgets what I say, and he thinks of me as a little girl. And his generation doesn't believe in feelings. Most of our conversations are about getting through the day's errands. So this forum is a great release for me.
And I recently started journaling, as part of my diet journey. I feel awkward about having a written record of my thoughts, but it feels good to actually do the writing. I haven't gotten into anything personal and I probably won't. But just expressing myself feels good and helps me focus on the day's diet lesson.
Annie in Delaware
For whatever reason writing my thoughts makes me irritated and upset. I have started to do it. I've gotten a few words out then deleted the whole thing and felt like I just wasted precious time.
It's the same sort of reaction I have to meditation. I have attempted some sort of meditation, usually with a group going through a guided meditation, but it usually just makes me feel irritated and upset and like I could have been doing something productive with that time.
I have even tried to write the story of what happened to my husband, but I haven't been able to do that either. I've started it and have the framework done, but when it comes to the non-technical stuff, the emotional stuff, I just can't bring myself to write it.
Machka in Oz6 -
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Matchka ~ Perhaps posting here is writing your thoughts.
Carol in GA4 -
I have had a nice 5-day break from work and from pretty much everything else. I wasn't feeling brilliant which was a good excuse to spend half my days in bed, and my waking time mostly reading and colouring.
As I started to feel better I felt like I should be doing things but I was able to put that constant drive to be productive away for the most part.
I did dye my hair, tidy the bathroom, clean a little of the kitchen, tidy the dressing room, and make some progress on some computer organising. But that's about it!
I did not go to the dentist ... she cancelled and I have rebooked. So the 'old tooth with the temporary crown is still a bit sore.
Back to work tomorrow ... but it's only 11:30 and I am already in bed!
M in Oz4 -
RAIN!!
In the last 13 or 14 hours, we have had the 10 mm in the image below plus another 11 mm that hasn't been added to the first 10 mm yet. 😃 And it is still raining!!
But have a look at how dry it has been leading up to this!!
Everything is brown and dusty here with bushfires popping up here and there.
Machka in Oz
We ended up with a very welcome 26 mm. Not nearly enough but because it fell steadily , it should do some good.
M in Oz5 -
@Heather. I figured out that the medication had just been increased a week earlier and thought I’d give it a shot. The first day, it worked. Tried another day, still good, so when I talk to doc tomorrow, I will explain what happened and what I did. I also plan on NOT taking or trying any more anxiety/depression medication! Seems every time I feel better, something happens to make the meds not work correctly. I will only try non-medicinal treatments for now.
RVrita6 -
Anna in Michigan - Good job standing firm! For me, measurements are a better indicator than that fickle scale that for me just tracks bathroom habits.
After years of stepping on Weight Watcher's scale, it was hard to give up. So I established a 5# range and no longer get focused on the daily ups and downs. Seems like older guys like your dad have a hard time keeping up with wearing and taking care of hearing aids. 
I will say my dad was pretty faithful wearing his up until he died 20 years ago - but they were always chirping - maybe this was the low battery indicator.
Today I'm hoping to play with the new laptop. It came with Windows 10S and I need to disable the S: instructions are on the Microsoft support website. Looks like 10S was created to only allow apps from the Microsoft store - some businesses and agencies and regular folks with busy grandkids needed it to prevent downloading willy nilly and potentially unsafe apps. Anyhow it's blocking downloads of Windows 11 and also apps like LibreOffice.
Did some weed eating yesterday then hopped on the mower and knocked down the high grassy spots in my lawn. There's a big patch in the back yard where grass just doesn't want to grow - crane fly damage and drought - and that's just the way it is. Seems many lawns on my little block have the same problem.
Have any of you ever played pickleball?
It's a beautiful morning. Quiet except for birds singing their little hearts out. I just had the girls out for a little walk/scratch about. I've noticed Fairy has the keenest eyesight - she can scratch just about anywhere and pull out an earthworm Gladys and Thelma overlook. I'm so fortunate to have them so tame I can stand right by them and watch so closely.
Back in a bit. Make it an awesome day
Lanette
SW WA State6 -
Rita-that is good news you were able to figure out the cause. Medications have lots of side effects (and some that aren't listed).
Kylia-glad you got out. Rain is supposed to start here tonight. According to our EMA memo we got-tomorrow around 3 pm it may turn very nasty-go home early! Channel 7 has same story.
Tracey-differing work schedules can cause relationship issues.
Debbie-sorry MIL struck again. However, it sounds like you cooked food you like (and son) so you have leftovers and don't have to bother with cooking. In terms of your DH-it is tougher getting out of some of the parental relationships than we may think. I believe it is harder for sons with their mother, but I could be wrong. I have found a lot of people at church dinners are reluctant to try anything new.
Machka-I had a very close work colleague who was not a toucher. When I was in the line at my mother's funeral she came up to me-many people were giving me hugs. She stood back a foot or so and looked at me-I nodded because I knew she could not hug-but the compassion and look in her eyes conveyed more support than any jug.
Heather-once again successful family art!
Carol-depending upon how BIL had things set up it may not be too hateful-let's hope attorney gave him good advice.
Lisa-fitbit does indeed say you are busy!
Margaret-great picture with your choir members.
Linda-it does sound like a true comedy of errors-it is good everyone could laugh!
Joy-prayers your daughter gets good news!
Lanette-glad you are comfortable with computer resolution.
Sue-that really stinks that toxic tenant has impacted you this much. Hope you can get her out soon.
Annie-I am happy they got your dad into PT. See it they let you in to observe-that way you know the proper exercises he will need to do at home. I am sure they will emphasize flexibility and balance-you may find them helpful also.
Terri-I admire your consistency and discipline.
Pip- don't know if I would have walked to gym or not, but I guess when weather is really bad and I walk inside the ouse for 30-45 minutes that is an alternative plan.
Busy day, got stuff done, more left to do. Need to get trash together for tomorrow. Don't think I will put big can to curb in case the storms over night are strong. Going to put together a "go" bag to have ready if have to hit basement tonight or tomorrow night.
Take care all,
Ginny in Ohio
The only time we drive to the gym is when we have to go somewhere else right after, sometimes not even then.3 -
Janie (sister) told me the cremation was going to be tomorrow, she’ll let me know the time. Janie also told me that she called judy(sister in law) and told her about mom, tony(brother) wasn’t home. She called to invite them to a gathering, potluck/bbq they were going to have for her. Tony and mom have been on the outs since I don’t know when so I doubt that he will be there but the invitation is there. Joey (brother that was staying with her) didn’t want to do any get together so Janie is and told him if he didn’t show up that was fine.
I swear, this is better than a soap opera, you can’t make this $”&t up14 -
For whatever reason writing my thoughts makes me irritated and upset. I have started to do it. I've gotten a few words out then deleted the whole thing and felt like I just wasted precious time.
It's the same sort of reaction I have to meditation. I have attempted some sort of meditation, usually with a group going through a guided meditation, but it usually just makes me feel irritated and upset and like I could have been doing something productive with that time.
I have even tried to write the story of what happened to my husband, but I haven't been able to do that either. I've started it and have the framework done, but when it comes to the non-technical stuff, the emotional stuff, I just can't bring myself to write it.
Machka in Oz
Machka- for what it's worth, I've been following Dr. David Hanscom for quite a while. He's a spinal surgeon in Seattle who discovered most folks can effectively treat back pain effectively without surgery.
Some of his ideas on healing include writing down thoughts every day then ripping them up. Expressive writing. Bad thoughts, good thoughts. Write out a page or two then tear it into bits. I do this from time to time and it's a great way to let off steam whether I'm experiencing actual pain or just getting lost and tangled in my own thoughts. I think he's right, physical and even emotional pain cut deep grooves in our brains over time. Figuring out how to detour pain and cut grooves of happiness and well-being is our mission.
Note that there's a way to do this even if a person doesn't want to write things down. Visualizing what we would write down, for example. Lots to unpack here:
https://backincontrol.com/the-4-stages/stage-1-laying-the-foundation/begin-expressive-writing/
I was a failure at journaling. This I can do.
Sending hugs
Lanette
SW WA State
5
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