doing it "right" getting nowhere
Replies
-
yeah but MFP is not a first resort. i've been counting calories and working out like a beast for 6 months. so it feels pretty dang depressing.
On the plus side, working out like a beast has probably improved your cardiovascular health. But if weight hasn't changed, you've been eating at maintenance - weight not changing is the definition of eating at maintenance.
Once you actually log accurately (and it may take some modification of exercise burns or a change to TDEE approach), and eat at a deficit, your weight will change.0 -
yeah but MFP is not a first resort. i've been counting calories...for 6 months.
No, you have not. You are not doing yourself, or the rest of us, any favors by saying this. You have no idea how many calories you've been eating.
You won't be able to change until you admit to yourself that you're doing something wrong.
because i haven;t been counting calories on this site it doesnt count?
OK, I'll play along.
Where have you been logging calories all this time? All through June, July, and August? Where did you log all those days?0 -
ok. eat more, log faithfully. i get that. i'll do it and pray i don't drive myself crazy. i'm so sorry i offended all of you. i really didn't mean to. i'm new to message boards clearly and take things too personally. i guess i was looking to hear if what i was trying was on the right track and didn't expect quite the passion y'all have for making sure everything is done a certain way. i'm so so sorry.
You'd just be surprised how often we hear "doing everything right, still not losing". We then question and look at diaries, and discover OP is not doing everything right, and try to explain this fact to them. They then argue about it. Often against people who really have been doing everything right and have lost 100, 200 or even 300+ pounds by doing so.
It gets people's backs up very quickly, because there's generally a constant low level of annoyance with all the other posters to begin with. So don't take it personally.
But do listen. Because some of the people in this thread are the most knowledgeable and helpful people you are likely to meet. And they can help you if you let them.
and that's why i came here- because i am so brokenhearted and depressed at how hard i work and how careful i've been and hoe stuck i am. i thought someone could encourage me to not lose hope because i'm just at the end of my rope.
You're not at the end of your rope. You're barely at the beginning. Start doing the things that will actually make MFP work for you and I think you'll find some hope pretty quickly.
yeah but MFP is not a first resort. i've been counting calories and working out like a beast for 6 months. so it feels pretty dang depressing.
Reading back through the thread I've discovered that you aren't logging accurately and you aren't doing it consistently.
Therefore - you are not at the end of your rope. The end would be where you were doing everything 100% accurately and consistently and could not lose. You are not doing that. You have lots of rope left.
No one is judging you or coming down on you. They're just telling you that you are not doing the work that will result in weight loss.
hate to disagree, but the WORK is the eating well and exercising. logging it into an app is the easy part.0 -
hate to disagree, but the WORK is the eating well and exercising. logging it into an app is the easy part.
Interesting is that the easy part is the part you're not doing.0 -
ok. eat more, log faithfully. i get that. i'll do it and pray i don't drive myself crazy. i'm so sorry i offended all of you. i really didn't mean to. i'm new to message boards clearly and take things too personally. i guess i was looking to hear if what i was trying was on the right track and didn't expect quite the passion y'all have for making sure everything is done a certain way. i'm so so sorry.
You'd just be surprised how often we hear "doing everything right, still not losing". We then question and look at diaries, and discover OP is not doing everything right, and try to explain this fact to them. They then argue about it. Often against people who really have been doing everything right and have lost 100, 200 or even 300+ pounds by doing so.
It gets people's backs up very quickly, because there's generally a constant low level of annoyance with all the other posters to begin with. So don't take it personally.
But do listen. Because some of the people in this thread are the most knowledgeable and helpful people you are likely to meet. And they can help you if you let them.
and that's why i came here- because i am so brokenhearted and depressed at how hard i work and how careful i've been and hoe stuck i am. i thought someone could encourage me to not lose hope because i'm just at the end of my rope.
You're not at the end of your rope. You're barely at the beginning. Start doing the things that will actually make MFP work for you and I think you'll find some hope pretty quickly.
yeah but MFP is not a first resort. i've been counting calories and working out like a beast for 6 months. so it feels pretty dang depressing.
Reading back through the thread I've discovered that you aren't logging accurately and you aren't doing it consistently.
Therefore - you are not at the end of your rope. The end would be where you were doing everything 100% accurately and consistently and could not lose. You are not doing that. You have lots of rope left.
No one is judging you or coming down on you. They're just telling you that you are not doing the work that will result in weight loss.
hate to disagree, but the WORK is the eating well and exercising. logging it into an app is the easy part.
You can "eat well" to the moon and back, it doesn't matter if you're not in a calorie deficit. That's how weight loss happens.
I think I'm about the 50th person who has said this in this thread.
Log every single bite you take for 6 weeks. Everything. Weigh and measure all of your food. Count every darn calorie. Eat back your breastfeeding calories AND your exercise calories. Do it right for 6 weeks and if you still haven't lost anything, then come back and complain. PM me personally and I will hold your hand through finding an answer.
But right now, the answer is (and remains) you aren't logging so you don't know what you're eating so you're probably not in a deficit and therefore not losing weight.0 -
hate to disagree, but the WORK is the eating well and exercising. logging it into an app is the easy part.
Interesting is that the easy part is the part you're not doing.
0 -
Weight loss is calories in vs calories out plain and simple if you do not know how many calories are going in no matter where you log it , on here or on paper, in a note book, on a mirror, on a boat, in a moat, you cannot accurately know what's going wrong!!!!!0
-
I think your username is very misleading.
You began this thread and asked, very broadly, for thoughts.
You've been given five pages of replies, and you deny or make excuses for every single comment.
What do you want to hear? That you're right, you must be a genetic outlier because you can't have possibly over or underestimated ANYthing, and of course you're doing it all right.
Except your results say you aren't.
Carry on. You clearly don't want advice from the responses you've given, so good luck in doing everything "right."
This is the perfect response.0 -
ok. eat more, log faithfully. i get that. i'll do it and pray i don't drive myself crazy. i'm so sorry i offended all of you. i really didn't mean to. i'm new to message boards clearly and take things too personally. i guess i was looking to hear if what i was trying was on the right track and didn't expect quite the passion y'all have for making sure everything is done a certain way. i'm so so sorry.
You'd just be surprised how often we hear "doing everything right, still not losing". We then question and look at diaries, and discover OP is not doing everything right, and try to explain this fact to them. They then argue about it. Often against people who really have been doing everything right and have lost 100, 200 or even 300+ pounds by doing so.
It gets people's backs up very quickly, because there's generally a constant low level of annoyance with all the other posters to begin with. So don't take it personally.
But do listen. Because some of the people in this thread are the most knowledgeable and helpful people you are likely to meet. And they can help you if you let them.
and that's why i came here- because i am so brokenhearted and depressed at how hard i work and how careful i've been and hoe stuck i am. i thought someone could encourage me to not lose hope because i'm just at the end of my rope.
Don't lose hope. You can do this. And the plan does work. If you follow it properly, and adjust based on observed results.
If you weigh accurately and log consistently, you can be pretty confident in your intake number.
Then in six weeks time you can compare your actual results to the predicted results. If the actual results don't match the predicted results, then you are either under logging food, or over-logging exercise. You can discount the food, because you've been so careful in weighing it accurately. So you know you need to adjust down exercise. Calorie burns are always estimates at best, and you always have to adjust based on observed results. Personally I'd start with the spin bike burns. I know spin bike is exhausting, but even so those burns are pretty large and a likely source of error.
Let me share an example from the summer of how this technique really works. It's real, and if you want I can show you weight loss charts and my diet/exercise diary to prove it.
I'd lost 60 pounds pretty consistently since September 2012. Then summer time arrived, and I started swimming and taking the kids to the pool. I logged my swimming and ate back the calories. I adjust down a little due to interruptions from the kids. Then my weight loss stalled. I bounced around 160 pounds for about six weeks. Then the kids went back to school, I stopped swimming with them so much, and bam, my weight loss started up again. I could go on the forum and say "I'm doing everything right, but not losing!", or I could look at the item in my diary with the least proven track record of leading to weight loss - my swimming. Now, if I go swimming with the kids, I adjust the calories even further back to account for distractions, and now it doesn't interfere with my weight loss. I didn't mean to, but I was simply eating too much. The fact that everything else had been logged accurately and I constantly compared actual to existing results, meant I could isolate what I was doing wrong very easily, and fix it.0 -
Good grief OP. Quit arguing with everyone and just admit that you haven't been eating as well as you claim, you haven't been logging as well as you claim and quit being so damn defensive!! If you want results, LISTEN TO ALL THE GOOD ADVICE THAT HAS BEEN OFFERED IN THIS THREAD. If you want to continue to be frustrated and disappointed, then by all means, keep whining and arguing and insisting that you are doing things right.
It's ok to be wrong. It's not ok to be proven wrong and continue to insist that you're right.0 -
ok. eat more, log faithfully. i get that. i'll do it and pray i don't drive myself crazy. i'm so sorry i offended all of you. i really didn't mean to. i'm new to message boards clearly and take things too personally. i guess i was looking to hear if what i was trying was on the right track and didn't expect quite the passion y'all have for making sure everything is done a certain way. i'm so so sorry.
My tips for surviving the message boards.
1) Read everything with an open mind.
2) Realize no one is judging you, except yourself.
3) Don't take anything personally, everyone is just trying to help.
4) Advice can vary and will only be as good as the info that is given. This is why you have to give as much truthful info as possible.
5) If you start getting upset by something you read, see #1, #2 and #3. Rinse and repeat.
I forgot rule #6 the MOST important one...If you don't really want advice or help, then don't ask. If you only want to hear things that coddle you, enable you, or you have tunnel hearing...again, don't ask.0 -
I have now officially spent too much time down in the gutter arguing with unsuccessful people who are not doing the things they need to be doing, but are super argumentative and whiny regardless.
I am now going to go do some deadlifts then eat a dinner and dessert that I've carefully weighed and logged. I will then continue being wildly successful, as I have been for quite some time now.
I shall lead by example, and hope the OP follows.0 -
Weight loss is calories in vs calories out plain and simple if you do not know how many calories are going in no matter where you log it , on here or on paper, in a note book, on a mirror, on a boat, in a moat, you cannot accurately know what's going wrong!!!!!
Stop with your logic!!!0 -
I have now officially spent too much time down in the gutter arguing with unsuccessful people who are not doing the things they need to be doing, but are super argumentative and whiny regardless.
I am now going to go do some deadlifts then eat a dinner and dessert that I've carefully weighed and logged. I will then continue being wildly successful, as I have been for quite some time now.
I shall lead by example, and hope the OP follows.
Again, high five!!!0 -
OP, I'm positively impressed that you've done a 180 turn on your attitude and are listening to some advice from people willing to put in the time to help you.
You've got this. Listen and learn.
My only additional advice is that weight loss has a huge psychological factor that not only directly affects adherence but also thr weight loss itself (UVA sleep, hormones, etc...) find your balance, relax, you aren't at the end if your rope. You will get this, sometimes it just takes time.
Good luck.0 -
I just want to say I love my FL.
0 -
OP, I'm positively impressed that you've done a 180 turn on your attitude and are listening to some advice from people willing to put in the time to help you.
You've got this. Listen and learn.
My only additional advice is that weight loss has a huge psychological factor that not only directly affects adherence but also thr weight loss itself (UVA sleep, hormones, etc...) find your balance, relax, you aren't at the end if your rope. You will get this, sometimes it just takes time.
Good luck.
She's now done a 360! That was the fastest 180 and then 180 again ever...0 -
So, OP, you have received some wonderful advice here. The first thing you have to do is start logging everything. That's the only thing you have to change today. Start logging, to ensure you are at a calorie deficit.
Do that for a month. Then, please start another thread if you are still struggling, and you will get help. Support here isn't always a pat on the back - sometimes, it is a wake up call. Don't beat yourself up, and don't apologise any more. Just agree to accept the advice you have been given and use it.
The people here are taking the time to reply to you because they don't want you to fail. Caring is expressed in different ways. By bothering to respond, instead of just ignoring your thread, these people have shown you that they care and they think you can succeed.0 -
Do that for a month. Then, please start another thread if you are still struggling, and you will get help. Support here isn't always a pat on the back - sometimes, it is a wake up call. Don't beat yourself up, and don't apologise any more. Just agree to accept the advice you have been given and use it.
She'll come back, post another thread, get great advice and still not listen to it.0 -
Do that for a month. Then, please start another thread if you are still struggling, and you will get help. Support here isn't always a pat on the back - sometimes, it is a wake up call. Don't beat yourself up, and don't apologise any more. Just agree to accept the advice you have been given and use it.
She'll come back, post another thread, get great advice and still not listen to it.
Maybe. Or maybe if she takes the advice that was given, it will be a success story. Being an optimist is exhausting, sometimes, but I am what I am.0 -
ok now that was unnecessary. Hopefully she does not.
Do that for a month. Then, please start another thread if you are still struggling, and you will get help. Support here isn't always a pat on the back - sometimes, it is a wake up call. Don't beat yourself up, and don't apologise any more. Just agree to accept the advice you have been given and use it.
She'll come back, post another thread, get great advice and still not listen to it.0 -
Do that for a month. Then, please start another thread if you are still struggling, and you will get help. Support here isn't always a pat on the back - sometimes, it is a wake up call. Don't beat yourself up, and don't apologise any more. Just agree to accept the advice you have been given and use it.
She'll come back, post another thread, get great advice and still not listen to it.
Maybe. Or maybe if she takes the advice that was given, it will be a success story. Being an optimist is exhausting, sometimes, but I am what I am.
And I agree, but she's already went back to her original stance.0 -
Do that for a month. Then, please start another thread if you are still struggling, and you will get help. Support here isn't always a pat on the back - sometimes, it is a wake up call. Don't beat yourself up, and don't apologise any more. Just agree to accept the advice you have been given and use it.
She'll come back, post another thread, get great advice and still not listen to it.
Maybe. Or maybe if she takes the advice that was given, it will be a success story. Being an optimist is exhausting, sometimes, but I am what I am.
And I agree, but she's already went back to her original stance.
Let's just hope she proves you wrong. It could totally happen.
0 -
So, OP, you have received some wonderful advice here. The first thing you have to do is start logging everything. That's the only thing you have to change today. Start logging, to ensure you are at a calorie deficit.
Do that for a month. Then, please start another thread if you are still struggling, and you will get help. Support here isn't always a pat on the back - sometimes, it is a wake up call. Don't beat yourself up, and don't apologise any more. Just agree to accept the advice you have been given and use it.
The people here are taking the time to reply to you because they don't want you to fail. Caring is expressed in different ways. By bothering to respond, instead of just ignoring your thread, these people have shown you that they care and they think you can succeed.
I love you
0 -
The body keeps an accurate diary no matter what you write down. It doesn't sound like you're ready to admit you're not a special snowflake so I recommend getting your thyroid checked, that MUST be it.0
-
you guys are hilarious. someone comes on for support and you do nothing but try to tear them to shreds.
Oh, support? I thought you wanted advice. I thought you wanted to understand what you were doing wrong.
You want support instead? OK.
You are doing everything right, honey. The world is conspiring against you and your genes and the universe and gluten and food addiction all have it in for you. You keep trying, dear. You're doing fine, even though you're failing miserably at your goals. Just keep doing what you're doing, because you're awesome and pretty and perfect and important.
If you decide you actually want to progress and achieve your goals, then we can talk, but you might not like what you hear because it will involve you changing something and admitting to yourself that you might not be comfortable hearing.
other than eating more, what do you suggest i change?
Log consistently over time. A week, week and a half of logging is not enough data. Log your food accurately using a food scale, enter calorie burns in a reasonable manner (yours look much, much higher than reasonable), and hit your goal consistently.
have you taken a spin class at a sustained 160-180bpm? done the JMBR workouts at 150-175 bpm sustained? as a 180 pound woman? i'm fairly confident in my burns. i will give the logging more time, because i do want to see if eating more helps.
I weigh over 100 lbs more than you and am male and younger, I MIGHT burn that much doing those activities, but it's unlikely.
HRMs are rated for jogging outdoors. Not intervals, not treadmills with your hands on the railing, not exercise videos, not weight lifting or resistance training. Even then, it's based off estimates, generalizations to be 'kinda close' for as many people as possible. There's a VERY high possibility your burns are inaccurate. That's not to say you aren't working hard or burning a lot, but rather that the technology isn't designed for what you're asking it to do.0 -
Do that for a month. Then, please start another thread if you are still struggling, and you will get help. Support here isn't always a pat on the back - sometimes, it is a wake up call. Don't beat yourself up, and don't apologise any more. Just agree to accept the advice you have been given and use it.
She'll come back, post another thread, get great advice and still not listen to it.
Maybe. Or maybe if she takes the advice that was given, it will be a success story. Being an optimist is exhausting, sometimes, but I am what I am.
And I agree, but she's already went back to her original stance.
Let's just hope she proves you wrong. It could totally happen.
We can only hope. :flowerforyou:0 -
Normally I would agree with the above posters about not being accurate BUT I do agree with a couple of "been there, done that" nursing mothers who have chimed in. I am nursing a 4 month old and have a similar story about how I lost all my weight quickly and have stalled despite several different calorie config. At first I was trying to eat above maintenance (plus 500 for nursing) and *lo and behold despite the "calories in, calories out method* DID NOT GAIN. I was then at maintenance for about 2 months and stayed the same. I then dropped by 300 cals a day (netting 1700-1800) and DID NOT LOSE. And I log consistently. Everything. I just reached 250 days straight, minus 1 cheat day a week.
My point is that, while you obviously need to log to be certain of the calories you're eating, the nursing body is a phenomenon in every way, especially when it comes to weight loss/gain. This is my fourth baby that I have nursed and I have found that I stay the same weight until I stop nursing. Although exercise is necessary for my mental health/energy/levels/body comp, I've learned not to rely on it or food logging for weight loss while nursing. As long as I'm not consistently OVER my calorie goals, I know that I will pretty much stay the same weight. It is frustrating, and I have found myself wishing I could *actively* lose weight, but then I remember that what I am doing while nursing (and being at the sadistic whims of my hormones) is the most important thing right now and that it doesn't matter if I feel "fat." (I remember you said that earlier in the thread and I can relate to that, although I am at a healthy BMI and only have about 5 more pounds to lose so I know I am not fat.)
If you are ready to log consistently and get positive feedback/encouragement (no attention for whining, though,) feel free to add me as a friend!0 -
OP, to answer the question you've mentioned the last couple of pages, no, you probably don't need to eat more. I agree with those who suggest start with logging every day, and if you don't lose or even gain, reevaluate your burns.
But I saw you mention anorexia, getting OCD about your logging, PCOS, pregnancy/delivery, breastfeeding, having lost weight successfully, and an awful lot of exercising. My main question is-are you under the care of a doctor? Consider working with a doctor who takes an integrated approach to health-diet, fitness, medicine when appropriate, mental health therapy when needed, stress management. I am not trying to judge you, but the common theme in your posts seems to be that you are not truly content in your approach to your health. Whether your maintenance is caused by inaccurate logging or burns, or a lower metabolism due to your medical conditions (even if your HRM was right in the past, I could imagine pregnancy and breastfeeding could be a change variable especially with PCOS), if you are doing everything right and getting nowhere, doesn't it make sense to get a professional on board with you?0 -
OP, to answer the question you've mentioned the last couple of pages, no, you probably don't need to eat more. I agree with those who suggest start with logging every day, and if you don't lose or even gain, reevaluate your burns.
But I saw you mention anorexia, getting OCD about your logging, PCOS, pregnancy/delivery, breastfeeding, having lost weight successfully, and an awful lot of exercising. My main question is-are you under the care of a doctor? Consider working with a doctor who takes an integrated approach to health-diet, fitness, medicine when appropriate, mental health therapy when needed, stress management. I am not trying to judge you, but the common theme in your posts seems to be that you are not truly content in your approach to your health. Whether your maintenance is caused by inaccurate logging or burns, or a lower metabolism due to your medical conditions (even if your HRM was right in the past, I could imagine pregnancy and breastfeeding could be a change variable especially with PCOS), if you are doing everything right and getting nowhere, doesn't it make sense to get a professional on board with you?
Totally agree. It sounds like you feel very stressed/anxious about this. It wouldn't hurt to talk to a doctor about everything that's going on, including how much you exercise, to see if he/she has some suggestions.0
Categories
- All Categories
- 1.4M Health, Wellness and Goals
- 393.3K Introduce Yourself
- 43.8K Getting Started
- 260.2K Health and Weight Loss
- 175.9K Food and Nutrition
- 47.4K Recipes
- 232.5K Fitness and Exercise
- 424 Sleep, Mindfulness and Overall Wellness
- 6.5K Goal: Maintaining Weight
- 8.5K Goal: Gaining Weight and Body Building
- 153K Motivation and Support
- 8K Challenges
- 1.3K Debate Club
- 96.3K Chit-Chat
- 2.5K Fun and Games
- 3.7K MyFitnessPal Information
- 24 News and Announcements
- 1.1K Feature Suggestions and Ideas
- 2.6K MyFitnessPal Tech Support Questions