Do you leash your kid?
Replies
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My mom used one of those harness things on my brother when he was really young, but he was a hellion and would take off in a split second. This was over 40 years ago.
No, I have never put a harness on my kids. The only one wearing a leash in my house is my English Bulldog when he goes out for his walk.0 -
^^ This was me (the few times I tried it.)0 -
I can just feel it... this thread's going to be the perfect distraction for Friday afternoon boredom @ the office.
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I leashed my oldest child. She was a runner when she was little. She also had nursemaid's elbow, which meant it was very easy for her to partially dislocate her radius near her elbow. It was very painful for her, and it happened quite frequently when she was younger, caused by rolling over in bed at night or tugging on her hand at the wrong angle, among other causes. If she was holding my hand when we were walking somewhere, I had to drop her hand immediately when she tugged or she could easily have her arm partially dislocated. The leash was a backup safety mechanism for us, so that if I did have to drop her hand she was still not able to bolt into traffic.
I used it as a tool in my parenting arsenal. I used it to keep my child safe and healthy. I try hard to not judge any parent for making a choice that I would not make, especially when I realize that their reasons for doing something may not be visible to me as an outsider. I don't know what factors went into their decision making process.0 -
Have nothing against either opinion, but I do wonder, "Are you required to carry a pooper scooper if you leash your child? Or plastic bags are good enough?" Just in case.
It's not like you are attaching them with a choke collar.0 -
I was one of those sanctimonious parents who swore I'd never leash my kid.
Then my 2-year old (now 7) ran away from me at a very crowded zoo in Tokyo. Imagine trying to chase a fast little bugger through a sea of people who will not get out of your way for anything. I mean thousands of people. Not like here where you can see her 20 or 30 feet ahead of you in a crowd. 5 feet away, and she's completely out of sight.
Lose your kid in Japan just once, and you put a leash on her from then on.0 -
I don't have children, but I was a full-time nanny for 2 years, and I never leashed the toddlers.
And I judge the crap out of people who do. >_>0 -
I just don't understand some of the comments....and still wonder why it bothers so much what a parent is doing for their own child's safety.0
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You leash pets, not children. If you can't keep control of them in public, don't take them out in public. This is one of those things that's a parent problem, not a child problem.
Lol, what? How do you never take your kids in public?0 -
I am loving the perfect people on here with their seemingly perfect offspring... as if you never did anything that other parents might question ever... I hope your perfection lasts.0
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On my way to work this morning, I was listening to the local radio station and they were discussing parents placing their kids on leashes to prevent them from running off. One of the radio hosts commented that leashing your kid is only for fat and lazy parents. My daughter is older now but I would have never considered putting her on a leash! What in the world is wrong with holding your kid's hand? Leashes are for animals, not children.
I've used one...at the airport. People can say what they want; I was travelling without my husband, with luggage, a toddler, and a carseat. Everyone knows how awful the airport is, and since I couldn't hold her and everything else, I didn't want to risk taking my eyes from my child for one second to get a ticket/boarding/pass/or do the myriad of other things that need to be done at the airport, and have someone casually walk by and snatch her. Can't happen if she's attached to me.
I remember one guy telling me he had back problems and the "leash" kept him from having to bend down when he held hands with his small child.
The point is,
With all the horrible things parents do to their children out there, how dare anyone (and especially people without kids) judge people for something like this? They can kiss my rosy white bum.0 -
I am loving the perfect people on here with their seemingly perfect offspring... as if you never did anything that other parents might question ever... I hope your perfection lasts.
This times 100.
I wish I was a super-mom type who never did anything wrong, but I'm not. I'm just a mom who makes sure my kid is safe, fed, loved and clean and the rest is just semantics.0 -
^this!This topic has already been discussed on here and it did not go well.
Some children don't hold hands well and slip out of their parents grip and if it came down to putting your kids in a backpack leash or them dying by running in front of a car or getting stolen, I would go with the leash.
How about you not judge other parents?0 -
You leash pets, not children. If you can't keep control of them in public, don't take them out in public. This is one of those things that's a parent problem, not a child problem.
Lol, what? How do you never take your kids in public?
Well, obviously the poster is a perfect parent with perfect children...
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You leash pets, not children. If you can't keep control of them in public, don't take them out in public. This is one of those things that's a parent problem, not a child problem.
Lol, what? How do you never take your kids in public?
And also wanting to add that you can't "control" kids anyway; they're to be guided. Boundaries are needed. Again, they're not mini adults.
I also wonder how those of you who are so against harnesses feel about things like extended rear-facing in carseats, breastfeeding only, etc.....things that other parents think are best for YOUR child.0 -
with my first i used a leash...it looked like a monkey back pack with a tail for the handle. it made me feel safer when taking her to busy places and let her have a little more freedome than being in the stroller. My second hasnt really gotten to the point where she wants the freedome to walk yet so i dont know if i will feel like we need to use it or not0
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Having walked a dog and held on to a tail of a backpack lion, let me be the first to tell you having a child with a cute animal backpack is not a "leash". You cannot control a child's direction or make him or her move. You can only restrict movement (like a car with a passenger side set of breaks in a car where you can stop the car but not steer). The tail is secure enough to prevent forward motion, but that is about it.
Bookbags with tails allow you to allow your small child on his or her own feet to explore and yet still prevent potential disaster. It allows him or her to move and explore without you attempting to hold on to your 12-24 month old's hand constantly. It allows them more freedom to the child than any other method I've tried. I'm not talking about a harness here (and I am slow to judge even there, because you never know why a parent makes that decision), but a bookbag with a tail is much like a walker with a parent or gaurdian as the safety feature. I wasn't able to shop or do anything while having my nephew's lion's tail because he decided what we were doing, but we had a blast.0 -
I have 3 boys ages 13, 10 and 5 I have never used a leash on them and they all learned that when we are in parking lots or walking they need to hold my hand or the cart.. They learned it very fast and never had a issue with them... My sister has a 5 year old who is Autistic and doesn't understand he can't just dash off in a parking lot or when she holds his hand he will fling him self to the floor which has caused him to hurt himself.. When he was about 2 she put him on one of those backpacks that it looks like the kid is wearing a animal back pack but their is a leash that the parent holds on to.. it worked like a charm, she was able to go places with him like the zoo and allow him to walk and explore things without having to panic about him getting hurt or run off... I think all parents need to do what they feel is best for Their child and not worry if others don't do what they do...0
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When you have two hands to hold onto at the same time, you damn well bet I leashed them (twins).
I have two children.. and two hands. I've never leashed my children and we have spent plenty of times in airports, zoos and even foreign countries.
Rather than leashing them I taught them when they needed to stay close, and disciplined them when they didn't.
Why do you care how other people raise their kids?
It's a discussion forum, I'm not obligated to agree with you. Otherwise every thread on the board would be very short and go like this:
Post #1 - I have an opinion
Post#2 - I agree with your opinion
/thread
By the way those of us that don't leash our pets, I mean kids, don't think we are perfect parents, nor do we think we have perfect children. What we are doing is disagreeing with a method that you are employing to raise your kids.
I don't see what value a leash has, other than to make it so that some people have to pay less attention to their kids.
Again if the environment is not SAFE enough for your child to walk unrestricted, then why are you giving them more freedom or space? If's life is so dangerous that you need to tether your child to your side... then there is a problem.0 -
I don't have children, but I was a full-time nanny for 2 years, and I never leashed the toddlers.
And I judge the crap out of people who do. >_>
You seem pleasant.
Regarding the OP: I don't have kids and when I started reading this thread, I was of the opinion I would never leash one of my own. However after reading the descriptions of the unruly little ones and wanting to keep them from getting hurt, it may be something I consider in the future. I guess it'll just depend on what my future kid will be like.0 -
I wouldn't go so far as to say that leashes are for "fat/lazy parents". You can not possibly know what a parent/child situation is in the minute it takes for you to walk by them.
That being said, I have 7 children when my twins were born #6  my eldest was 7, and I don't use leashes. I practiced at home what was expected and if someone tried not listening when called, we would go home. I didn't care how long we had been there or even if we had just arrived. They knew it and worked hard at following directions. I also had an awesome double stroller that had hand grips on each side which worked so well for the 1 1/2 and 3 year old to have something tangible to hold on to. We go to zoos, parks, museums, stores, etc most of the time I take them by myself.
It takes time to train children and some are little firecrackers that take all the more patience and practice. When the twins were starting to walk well, we practiced holding hands or stroller handles quite a few times in a safe place before I ever tried it out in public. It took lots of work, but now they do very well. They come when called and will hold my skirt or hand when instructed. If they don't, they loose the freedom of walking and exploring.
When I see a parent and child using and leash that are interacting with each other and enjoying each others company, I don't think anything about it. When I see a parent and child using a leash and the child is being a terror and the parent has this frazzled "I don't know why they act like this" look on their face, I feel sorry for them both. Although, neither one of those really has much to do with the use of a leash.0 -
I read somewhere that the child learns to prefer the leash, and feels safe with it, and learns to like the limitations & constraints.
But if used excessively, they willl grow up passive, and like to wear leather collars & leashes, and will seek a dominant mate.0 -
When you have two hands to hold onto at the same time, you damn well bet I leashed them (twins).
I have two children.. and two hands. I've never leashed my children and we have spent plenty of times in airports, zoos and even foreign countries.
Rather than leashing them I taught them when they needed to stay close, and disciplined them when they didn't.
Why do you care how other people raise their kids?
It's a discussion forum, I'm not obligated to agree with you. Otherwise every thread on the board would be very short and go like this:
Post #1 - I have an opinion
Post#2 - I agree with your opinion
/thread
By the way those of us that don't leash our pets, I mean kids, don't think we are perfect parents, nor do we think we have perfect children. What we are doing is disagreeing with a method that you are employing to raise your kids.
I don't see what value a leash has, other than to make it so that some people have to pay less attention to their kids.
Again if the environment is not SAFE enough for your child to walk unrestricted, then why are you giving them more freedom or space? If's life is so dangerous that you need to tether your child to your side... then there is a problem.
i agree that you do not have to agree with parents who choose to leash and that if everyone agreed life would be boring, what i have a problem with is that you feel the need to be rude. its ok that you dont see the value but dont argue that its so people can pay less attention to their children, that is just as rude as accusing you of thinking you are a perfect parent. also your little slam in the beggining where you called kids pets...not neccisary. i do feel that we live in a dangerouse world where people take children and hurt them so if "tethering" my child to me makes me feel like i can keep them safer then awesome for me!0 -
When you have two hands to hold onto at the same time, you damn well bet I leashed them (twins).
I have two children.. and two hands. I've never leashed my children and we have spent plenty of times in airports, zoos and even foreign countries.
Rather than leashing them I taught them when they needed to stay close, and disciplined them when they didn't.
Why do you care how other people raise their kids?
It's a discussion forum, I'm not obligated to agree with you. Otherwise every thread on the board would be very short and go like this:
Post #1 - I have an opinion
Post#2 - I agree with your opinion
/thread
By the way those of us that don't leash our pets, I mean kids, don't think we are perfect parents, nor do we think we have perfect children. What we are doing is disagreeing with a method that you are employing to raise your kids.
I don't see what value a leash has, other than to make it so that some people have to pay less attention to their kids.
Again if the environment is not SAFE enough for your child to walk unrestricted, then why are you giving them more freedom or space? If's life is so dangerous that you need to tether your child to your side... then there is a problem.
i agree that you do not have to agree with parents who choose to leash and that if everyone agreed life would be boring, what i have a problem with is that you feel the need to be rude. its ok that you dont see the value but dont argue that its so people can pay less attention to their children, that is just as rude as accusing you of thinking you are a perfect parent. also your little slam in the beggining where you called kids pets...not neccisary. i do feel that we live in a dangerouse world where people take children and hurt them so if "tethering" my child to me makes me feel like i can keep them safer then awesome for me!
I am sorry. I was rude and judgmental. After going back through the thread and re-reading some of the posts I now understand your point much more clearly.
Keeping kids close and safe is a difficult task. I know my kids make me work for it. It only makes sense to tie them up with a rope so they can't get too far away. I stand corrected.
My apologies.0 -
I saw a woman once lift her child up by the harness and belt him. It was ugly. Dangling there like a bloody kick bag. And yes I stood and judged and copped a gobful for it. However that's the only negative I've seen with the use of them. I've never used one but understand why some parents would and since that episode, thankfully, I've only ever seen parents using them for peace of mind. I've always noticed that the harness is relaxed and no tugging or dragging of the child. Most parents who use them still pick their child up or go to the child if they begin to strain on it. If I did use some sort of restraint (especially in a crowd) I think I'd prefer the wrist to wrist one as the parent is harnessed too. Fair's fair
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On my way to work this morning, I was listening to the local radio station and they were discussing parents placing their kids on leashes to prevent them from running off. One of the radio hosts commented that leashing your kid is only for fat and lazy parents. My daughter is older now but I would have never considered putting her on a leash! What in the world is wrong with holding your kid's hand? Leashes are for animals, not children.
I totally agree!!!!!0 -
I live in the UK and come from the Jamie Bulger generation. I had no qualms using reins when my daughter was toddling. However, its each to their own. I wouldn't dictate to another parent if they should use them or not.0
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Did I? No... but I sure wished I could have. It only takes a SPLIT SECOND for your attention to be taken away from your child and your child could disappear or hurt himself/herself.
I was at Walmart, my daughter was very young... about 2 years old and I took all 3 of the children to get their pictures taken. She was standing right beside me and the other 2 children, and when I was looking at the prints she bolted off... It wasn't even 30 seconds and I went to grab her hand and she was GONE. I looked everywhere in that photography station... and at the time it was by the doors leading to the outside. I WAS FRANTIC!!!! I asked my oldest if he had seen her, and he said no he was playing with the baby! I tell you... MY HEART STOPPED. Walmart called a code ADAM and shut every entrance to the store... NO ONE could come in or leave. I found her.... talking to an elderly couple back by the tires.
All of that was in a span of 5 minutes, but let me tell you... the TEARS and PANIC and FEAR that swept over me.... it was horrible!!!!
I never... EVER judge someone when it comes to using a leash to keep their child from running very far. If I had used that, she wouldn't have left my side. It doesn't take long for something horrible to happen. I btw never used a leash afterwards... I never heard of them! ((or maybe they weren't made back then?))
Please be kind to another... and don't judge someone that uses these. I'd rather have a child that was around to love than to have a child gone forever. You just never know.0 -
Time and place, is all I can say. Not having any children of my own, I want to say that I wouldn't do it, but who knows... I remember being "leashed" as a kid when we went on family vacations. My mom was not lazy at all. She was paranoid that I'd wander off and a stranger would snatch me up...seriously. (I was probably the most cautious kid since she would tell me horror stories about kids being kidnapped at disneyland or being crushed to death by a television or having my head chopped off by a fence or tree if I put it out the window in the car. She wasn't trying to be cruel. She was actually paranoid that these things would happen...)
Sister?!! The head or arm out the window...omg you were going to get it snapped off if another car came too close.0
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