Living with an unhealthy eater

tfleischer

Also another thing that helps me decide whether to eat it or not is by logging it before I eat, then I can decide if it is worth the calories

That is awesome advice! Much better than logging afterwards and then having the guilties about it.

laineybz

Willpower is needed. Plain and simple. None of my family (who I live with) watch what they eat. They eat a lot of rubbish. Don't get me wrong, I don't eat 100% healthy. I get the sighs and comments when I say I don't want a Chinese takeaway but I genuinely don't want one. If I want one, I work out to allow for one.

zyxst

Moar cake gifs!



Sort of OT: My husband and I eat different amounts of the same foods. Yes, he should lose weight (as the doctor and his mother keep nagging him). I rarely mess with his food, unless he's chowing through a whole bag of something he'll want later. I had to hide his bag of Ruffles last night so he could have some to eat tonight with supper.

As others have said: you can only control what goes into your mouth. I'm leery of people who control what other adults (not with standing any mental or physical problems) eat.

QuietBloom

12 Steppers have an old saying: "If you sit in a barber's chair long enough, you're gonna get a haircut."

I think the same is true of unhealthy foods, especially for me. If the place where I LIVE every day has bags and bags of chips and cookies, 2-inch thick fatty ribeye steaks, tubs of ice cream, giant baked potatoes loaded with sour cream, butter, bacon bits and dozens of pies, the truth is this: I am gonna F'ing eat them! If I were the picture of self control, I wouldn't weight 300+ lbs.

Personally, I didn't get to the shape I am in where I need to lose 125 lbs. because I was able to resist that stuff before. What in the world makes me think that after decades of over-eating this stuff that I can flick a magical switch in my mind and henceforth and forevermore choose to eat celerty and carrots when everyone else is eating cake, cookies and goddam delicious cheese dip and Tostitos?

Food is a connection. It carries social and family connections, sensory and memory connections. We remember the meals from our childhood with love and fondness. Things were "made with love" when the food itself was made to kill us! Think about the meatloaf, mashed potatoes and gravy mom made for us... Fill in the blanks on whatever dish it is that brings back those feelings and memories of being safe and loved and in the heart of a family. And if you didn't have that family, maybe you turned to food as a replacement for those feelings.

Food is powerful stuff. It is more than nutrients and calories. Much more. Pretending otherwise is false.

However, having said all of this, for people like me, food is also dangerous stuff. It is hard to resist because it is made to set off chemical and other reactions (that I have no real understanding of how it works, but it does) that make certain foods irresistible. Unfortunately, it is the deadly, fatty and sweet and salty foods that are most irresistible... Or am I the only one?

So, when we have made the decision to try to eat healthier and live healthier, it is going against every bit of advertising and marketing out there, as well as the close personal feelings driven by food and memory.

IT AIN'T EASY.....

Yet, it can be done. With support.


If we are honest with the people around us who SAY THAT THEY LOVE US, then the truth is that they are ****heads for not wanting us to succeed in being healthier people. I have been married 25 years to the same woman, more than half of my life. She's not going anywhere and I am not going anywhere. She knows me and knows that I have a problem with... let's face it..

Gluttony. And Sloth.

I want to be a couch potato. It is an old, in-grained habit that is hard for me to stop. But those two cardinal sins are killing me.

So I am trying to change, but if I had to do it in environment filled with the stuff that is killing me, I could not do it.

My family has made changes. That is not to say we are some kind of prison camp where you will eat your vegetables! But the junk food is gone. My 24 year old son keeps it in his bedroom, in his own fridge.

It is not wrong for the original poster to seek support in her new lifestyle.

You know - I hear your struggle man. But the whole 12 step thing is a crock. At some point, we are all called to deal with our own bad habits (not throw them in the trash so we don't have to look at them). The 12 steppers and AA'ers are all like, 'we can't help it man, it's a DISEASE.' Which is a pile of stinking doo-doo. Bad habits are not diseases. Diseases are caused by bad habits.

QuietBloom

Last year we ended up with a lot of leftover cake after a graduation celebration. It was a full sheet cake, so it was huge and I couldn't resist it. I pleaded with my husband to throw it away while we were cleaning up after the party. He refused. I kept going back to that damn cake. By the next day I took it upon myself to toss it in the nearest dumpster.

Only a real d!ck would light up in front of their friend despite their request not to.

So what you're saying about your husband is...........

bahahaha, glad I"m not the only one who thought this! Man, tell us how you really feel about your husband...

Pure gold, right? smh

LiminalAscendance

12 Steppers have an old saying: "If you sit in a barber's chair long enough, you're gonna get a haircut."

I think the same is true of unhealthy foods, especially for me. If the place where I LIVE every day has bags and bags of chips and cookies, 2-inch thick fatty ribeye steaks, tubs of ice cream, giant baked potatoes loaded with sour cream, butter, bacon bits and dozens of pies, the truth is this: I am gonna F'ing eat them! If I were the picture of self control, I wouldn't weight 300+ lbs.

Personally, I didn't get to the shape I am in where I need to lose 125 lbs. because I was able to resist that stuff before. What in the world makes me think that after decades of over-eating this stuff that I can flick a magical switch in my mind and henceforth and forevermore choose to eat celerty and carrots when everyone else is eating cake, cookies and goddam delicious cheese dip and Tostitos?

Food is a connection. It carries social and family connections, sensory and memory connections. We remember the meals from our childhood with love and fondness. Things were "made with love" when the food itself was made to kill us! Think about the meatloaf, mashed potatoes and gravy mom made for us... Fill in the blanks on whatever dish it is that brings back those feelings and memories of being safe and loved and in the heart of a family. And if you didn't have that family, maybe you turned to food as a replacement for those feelings.

Food is powerful stuff. It is more than nutrients and calories. Much more. Pretending otherwise is false.

However, having said all of this, for people like me, food is also dangerous stuff. It is hard to resist because it is made to set off chemical and other reactions (that I have no real understanding of how it works, but it does) that make certain foods irresistible. Unfortunately, it is the deadly, fatty and sweet and salty foods that are most irresistible... Or am I the only one?

So, when we have made the decision to try to eat healthier and live healthier, it is going against every bit of advertising and marketing out there, as well as the close personal feelings driven by food and memory.

IT AIN'T EASY.....

Yet, it can be done. With support.


If we are honest with the people around us who SAY THAT THEY LOVE US, then the truth is that they are ****heads for not wanting us to succeed in being healthier people. I have been married 25 years to the same woman, more than half of my life. She's not going anywhere and I am not going anywhere. She knows me and knows that I have a problem with... let's face it..

Gluttony. And Sloth.

I want to be a couch potato. It is an old, in-grained habit that is hard for me to stop. But those two cardinal sins are killing me.

So I am trying to change, but if I had to do it in environment filled with the stuff that is killing me, I could not do it.

My family has made changes. That is not to say we are some kind of prison camp where you will eat your vegetables! But the junk food is gone. My 24 year old son keeps it in his bedroom, in his own fridge.

It is not wrong for the original poster to seek support in her new lifestyle.

You know - I hear your struggle man. But the whole 12 step thing is a crock. At some point, we are all called to deal with our own bad habits (not throw them in the trash so we don't have to look at them). The 12 steppers and AA'ers are all like, 'we can't help it man, it's a DISEASE.' Which is a pile of stinking doo-doo. Bad habits are not diseases. Diseases are caused by bad habits.

And maybe some handle their "bad habits" by avoiding situations that precipitate them. Why does how someone else deals with their issues such a concern to so many here?

RivenV

12 Steppers have an old saying: "If you sit in a barber's chair long enough, you're gonna get a haircut."

I think the same is true of unhealthy foods, especially for me. If the place where I LIVE every day has bags and bags of chips and cookies, 2-inch thick fatty ribeye steaks, tubs of ice cream, giant baked potatoes loaded with sour cream, butter, bacon bits and dozens of pies, the truth is this: I am gonna F'ing eat them! If I were the picture of self control, I wouldn't weight 300+ lbs.

Personally, I didn't get to the shape I am in where I need to lose 125 lbs. because I was able to resist that stuff before. What in the world makes me think that after decades of over-eating this stuff that I can flick a magical switch in my mind and henceforth and forevermore choose to eat celerty and carrots when everyone else is eating cake, cookies and goddam delicious cheese dip and Tostitos?

Food is a connection. It carries social and family connections, sensory and memory connections. We remember the meals from our childhood with love and fondness. Things were "made with love" when the food itself was made to kill us! Think about the meatloaf, mashed potatoes and gravy mom made for us... Fill in the blanks on whatever dish it is that brings back those feelings and memories of being safe and loved and in the heart of a family. And if you didn't have that family, maybe you turned to food as a replacement for those feelings.

Food is powerful stuff. It is more than nutrients and calories. Much more. Pretending otherwise is false.

However, having said all of this, for people like me, food is also dangerous stuff. It is hard to resist because it is made to set off chemical and other reactions (that I have no real understanding of how it works, but it does) that make certain foods irresistible. Unfortunately, it is the deadly, fatty and sweet and salty foods that are most irresistible... Or am I the only one?

So, when we have made the decision to try to eat healthier and live healthier, it is going against every bit of advertising and marketing out there, as well as the close personal feelings driven by food and memory.

IT AIN'T EASY.....

Yet, it can be done. With support.


If we are honest with the people around us who SAY THAT THEY LOVE US, then the truth is that they are ****heads for not wanting us to succeed in being healthier people. I have been married 25 years to the same woman, more than half of my life. She's not going anywhere and I am not going anywhere. She knows me and knows that I have a problem with... let's face it..

Gluttony. And Sloth.

I want to be a couch potato. It is an old, in-grained habit that is hard for me to stop. But those two cardinal sins are killing me.

So I am trying to change, but if I had to do it in environment filled with the stuff that is killing me, I could not do it.

My family has made changes. That is not to say we are some kind of prison camp where you will eat your vegetables! But the junk food is gone. My 24 year old son keeps it in his bedroom, in his own fridge.

It is not wrong for the original poster to seek support in her new lifestyle.

You know - I hear your struggle man. But the whole 12 step thing is a crock. At some point, we are all called to deal with our own bad habits (not throw them in the trash so we don't have to look at them). The 12 steppers and AA'ers are all like, 'we can't help it man, it's a DISEASE.' Which is a pile of stinking doo-doo. Bad habits are not diseases. Diseases are caused by bad habits.

And maybe some handle their "bad habits" by avoiding situations that precipitate them. Why does how someone else deals with their issues such a concern to so many here?

Avoiding the situation is not dealing with it. It is avoiding it. Literally.

thekyleo

Bacon

2_blackdogs

My hubby is a crappy eater too...We are in the midst of a "no outside food" challenge for the month of November..maybe your boyfriend would be game for something like that too...that way you control EVERY calorie.

anorangie

So, I have been trying to change my lifestyle for the past 4 months now and it seems nearly impossible. I work in an office for 8 hours a day (which the only physical activity I get at work is walking to and from the printer... pathetic, I know) I bring healthy lunches, and eat a healthy breakfast every morning, but when I get home there's a box of Krispy Kreme donuts sitting on the counter that my boyfriend decided to pick up. Every weekend he's wanting to order pizza or stop by the burger joint that's next to our house, so we don't have to cook. It is the MOST difficult thing ever to try and resist the pizza and the treats when its in the house! I've been trying to motivate him so that we can do this together, (he could stand to lose a few pounds too) but it always seems to back fire! Are there any suggestions on what I should do, or what I can change?! I know the obvious choice is to resist the goodies, but it drives me insane trying to do this on my own without any support!

P.S.- Ive gained 25 pounds in the past 6 months- at this rate, I'm rapidly moving towards obesity! HELP!

Also, my profile picture is definitely not recent. Its my motivation picture. That was me at 120lbs

Hi, OP. Here's what helps me not to overeat--

1. I generally try to tell myself that it's not what I eat (whether pizza, or burgers, or chicken w/veggies) that matters as much as when I eat (when I'm hungry) and how I eat (mindfully and slowly, so I can tell when I'm full).

(My personal exception to this is obvious added sugar, which I limit but do not eliminate.)

2. I try to plan ahead and have foods on hand for those times when I know I will be rushed (in the am) or tired (in the pm), that is, those times when I will more likely make a food choice out of convenience, tiredness, or stress instead of consideration of my goals. It takes me some weekend time to prepare foods like soups (in the slow cooker), chicken or other proteins (again, in the slow cooker), hard boiled eggs, frozen breakfast smoothie fruit packs, breakfast quiches, mini meat & veggie loaves, or quinoa, but it doesn't take a lot of time. And it makes my week so much easier if I have at least some foods pre-made.

3. I have the mindset that I can't expect others to eat like I eat. For example, my husband brings home treats he likes that I'm currently limiting but that he's not avoiding. He is supportive of my goal to lose weight, but he doesn't have to do what I'm doing to show that support. (I do ask that we not keep the foods that I have historically either overeaten or binged on in sight, like on the counter all the time, just so I don't have to constantly exercise my willpower muscle. Just like my physical muscles, my willpower muscle needs rest days!)

4. And I try not to let myself get too hungry. By the time I'm past regular hunger and into famished territory, I'm more likely to overeat. So I always have a little something - like a Quest bar or some peanuts - with me to prevent getting too hungry.

Sorry if something like this has already been shared...I haven't read through all the thread yet. (I stopped reading when some of the posts became so judgy. )

Best wishes, OP.