Funniest things said in bed

Options
12357

Replies

  • wheird
    wheird Posts: 7,963 Member
    Options
    "You took it like a champ".

    LOL!!!!

    I said that ONE time. :angry:
  • Still1Workoutatatime
    Still1Workoutatatime Posts: 250 Member
    Options
    "You took it like a champ".

    LOL!!!!


    :laugh: :laugh: :laugh:
  • Still1Workoutatatime
    Still1Workoutatatime Posts: 250 Member
    Options
    Whispers in my ear in BABY TALK "Is your little lovehole ready for my shaft". Um....


    :noway: :noway: :noway: :laugh: :laugh: :laugh: :laugh:
  • Capt_Apollo
    Capt_Apollo Posts: 9,026 Member
    Options
    oh, is it really that little?
  • MyChocolateDiet
    MyChocolateDiet Posts: 22,281 Member
    Options
    On a front seat encounter with a firefighter between dinner and the movie was just supposed to be a make-out session for first date but then I guess he found it hot and left it wet as they say about those guys. Premature whatevs. (he was so worried about the impression he was leaving and thought if I got mine then he'd still be in good standing I guess? IDK) Since I just started dating him I didn't trust him to finish me off plus I didn't want to be late to the movie so when I bragged off/pleaded/excused him with the fact I could finish myself in 30 seconds it turned into a bet. I really didn't want to miss that movie and he really didn't want to pay the bet so he yelled at me at the top of his lungs in the parking lot..."GO GO! You can do it! Do it for your country!!!!" The whole time. I won the bet. I also won patriotism that night. :wink:
  • MyChocolateDiet
    MyChocolateDiet Posts: 22,281 Member
    Options
    Whispers in my ear in BABY TALK "Is your little lovehole ready for my shaft". Um....


    :noway: :noway: :noway: :laugh: :laugh: :laugh: :laugh:

    anytime if a guy ever says shaft I right away hear 70's funkadelic music and that guy in the show. it's haylair. but only to me.
  • skinnyinnotime
    skinnyinnotime Posts: 4,141 Member
    Options
    Guy: Feels good huh

    Me: er yeah (not at all)
  • harvo
    harvo Posts: 4,676 Member
    Options
    'Did i just break your nose?' My now ex wife asks as we were on yhe trampoline changing positions....or what my ex gf said (i wake up in her mouth and hear 'now that you are awake you have 3 minutes to finish or you are on your own' (as she hits the timer on her watch)
  • aquarabbit
    aquarabbit Posts: 1,622 Member
    Options
    One time my husband threw his arms in the air screamed "I AM AWESOME!" Lucky he did it to be funny because I burst out laughing and didn't stop for a good 10 minutes.
  • Hauntinglyfit
    Hauntinglyfit Posts: 5,537 Member
    Options
    Not necessarily funny, but i did have one guy try to convince me that I DID actually come after he asked me and i said "nope". He found it unbelievable that he didn't get me off and he was actually pissed off at me afterwards.
  • Amadbro
    Amadbro Posts: 750 Member
    Options
    Not directly "bed related" but my fiance and I had been dating for a little while and I had been staying at her apartment. After a few months she was getting letters from her apartment manager about complaints of "bedroom noises" late at night. Was rather embarrassing lol.
  • JONZ64
    JONZ64 Posts: 1,280 Member
    Options
    Was in hotel with VERY thin walls my girlfriend and I had "finished" we heard the people in the next room "start" They lasted about 2 minutes and my girlfriend beats on the wall and yells "You got ripped off!"
  • harvo
    harvo Posts: 4,676 Member
    Options
    Was in hotel with VERY thin walls my girlfriend and I had "finished" we heard the people next store "start" They lasted about 2 minutes and my girlfriend beats on the wall and yells "You got ripped off!"

    I call bullsh1t...i got mine....
  • KCoolBeanz
    KCoolBeanz Posts: 813 Member
    Options
    Was in hotel with VERY thin walls my girlfriend and I had "finished" we heard the people next store "start" They lasted about 2 minutes and my girlfriend beats on the wall and yells "You got ripped off!"

    I think your girlfriend is awesome!
  • JONZ64
    JONZ64 Posts: 1,280 Member
    Options
    Was in hotel with VERY thin walls my girlfriend and I had "finished" we heard the people next store "start" They lasted about 2 minutes and my girlfriend beats on the wall and yells "You got ripped off!"

    I think your girlfriend is awesome!

    She was pretty awesome
  • Just_Scott
    Just_Scott Posts: 1,766 Member
    Options
    "Just forget it.. Let's watch tv"

    That was you?!?
  • MyChocolateDiet
    MyChocolateDiet Posts: 22,281 Member
    Options
    Not necessarily funny, but i did have one guy try to convince me that I DID actually come after he asked me and i said "nope". He found it unbelievable that he didn't get me off and he was actually pissed off at me afterwards.

    THAT is haylarious. "Oh you know what you're right after all I think I did, don't know how I missed it?". Like WHAT do you say to that?
  • Amadbro
    Amadbro Posts: 750 Member
    Options
    "where's the rest of it?"
  • melb_alex
    melb_alex Posts: 1,154 Member
    Options
    I always get 'you effing s** girl' hehehehehe

    such a turn on.
  • wheird
    wheird Posts: 7,963 Member
    Options
    I accidentally got headbutted once. :grumble:

Categories