4 Years of being single

mmartinez_az

If you just want somebody to make you sammiches and wash your dirty drawers, get a mail order bride. I hear they prefer anal too.

I bet a zombie would get cheated with you looking for brains.

SymphonynSonata

Bookmarking.......is there a way to do that without having to make a post?

SezxyStef

if you answered seriously in this thread, please delete yourself

Some people have no sense of humour. This thread could have been amazing but for all those dullards giving proper advice. Bore off losers!!!

Maybe you just don't get dry sense of humour :laugh:

Haha hence the hire a maid, hire a cook and hire a date....

mank32

are you in incredible shape?

yes.

lauren3101

I meet lots of women, but it's never the right person at the right time. I have certain standards like in school or college degree, into some type of fitness, open minded, that I haven't budged on.

As seen by some posts, some people see 4 years of voluntarily being single as me having a problem. If I go in relationship for a few months, then women will see me as desirable and won't be seen as stale meat anymore.

With how awesome I am, I usually get "4 years single? You must be a player."

I'm habitually single (are we allowed to slap people when they ask HOW AREN'T YOU MARRIED?!) I have standards as well, and I tend to not budge much either, hey I'm only 25 I am allowed to be picky! I feel like you shouldn't ever lower your stands on things like education and well being, I can't date someone I cannot converse with, besides intelligence is sexy! If you have things like "must be 5'4' and 12 pounds and a rockin body", time to reevaluate, you might meet a chubby girl with the potential to be 'the one' but you are too close-minded to see past that, and understand that weight can be lost.

Thanks for serving your country (if that bit is true) and good luck on your search!

ETA: I hate laundry just as much as the next person, soooo if that's a requirement, ditch it. No one LIKES laundry

i dont think theres anything wrong with wanting someone with a rockin body. if thats what you want, and you lower your standards thats settling. i get it, some people dont care and the "inner beauty is what matters. most guys arent in greek god shape either.

I WANT someone with a rockin body too, but I also understand that there's a rockin body underneath a layer of fat if people want to work at it. I was only suggesting, that maybe he look at that as a malleable 'requirement' people gain and lose weight all the time, if he finds someone who is perfect, but is currently overweight, yet going to the gym and eating right to correct that, he shouldn't wash his hands of her.

Also, you're the guy who insinuated that all a woman has to offer is laundry, cooking and sex. So I basically take everything you say with an entire gallon of salt, not just a single grain

thats not what i was saying, i know they offer other things. not triyng to be rude, its simply my preference. im from a small town, want someone with those values.

In all seriousness, I have no problem with the sort of woman you are after, everyone has different tastes.

I am however a bit shocked by your apparent opinion that women that aren't 1950's wives aren't 'real women'. This is probably why you have been single for 8 years. The mild, subservient, maid-like, dress-wearing woman you are after is a dying breed, on account of the fact that this is indeed 2014.

I am curious to know, on the other hand, that if this is the sort of woman you want, are you prepared to 100% financially support her while she bakes cakes and pops out children?

djeffreys10

Being a sole bread winner while a woman stays at home and cooks, cleans, and takes care of kids isn't hard. Being a sole bread winner while a woman stays at home and cooks, cleans, and takes care of kids, and then tries to occupy the rest of her time by making it her personal hobby to blow the money that I worked for by shopping with no regards for savings/bills/etc. (because all that other crap isn't anywhere near a full time job) is a total pain in the *kitten*!

RllyGudTweetr

Most women who cook clean etc don't work.

My fiance does 99% of the house work (I clean the cat box) and all the laundry. Trash goes to whoever grabs it. I do 99% of the cooking (Also on that note, guys, don't believe women when they say how they're "slaving" over a stove. It's flat out not that hard). Doesn't snow here so I'm not sure who would shovel but I get what little yard work we have. Both of us work full time. Neither of us work 60 hours a week (seriously, cut back and enjoy life more if you work 60 hours). She also she makes at least 50% more than me.

Yup I do 90% of the housework, I refuse to take the garbage and clean the cat litter...we split cooking....btw making homemade donuts and bread and pie is hard work...

But. . . but. . . if making homemade donuts, etc., is hard work, why do the MFP forumites have so much resistance to counting the activity as exercise? [/sarcasm]

Slacker16

At what age or point do I settle for less just so I can 'be in a relationship'? It'd be nice to stop doing my laundry every week, stop cooking every meal for myself, stop spending valentines day alone... etc.

Desperation starts when your kleenex budget becomes larger than your food budget.

I don't get why so many jimmies were rustled. He didn't say he wants to completely stop cooking and doing the laundry, just that he's tired of doing laundry _every week_ and cooking _every meal_. I.e. wants someone to share the burden.

DMZ_1

I have not read all the responses, but I think a lot of you are being too tough on the OP, if he's genuine.

If you are single and manage a one person household at any time for any period of time beyond a couple of months, you'd realize where he comes from is a perfectly rational place.

Let's say for instance that the OP lives in a one bedroom apartment complex. Since he's in an apartment, when things break, like the sink or the dishwasher, or there is an electrical malfunction, the apartment complex fixes it. He wouldn't have to deal with scheduling plumbers or electricians. That helps. But even after that, there's still laundry, grocery shopping, cooking, and cleaning. That comes on top of working an 40+ hour work, not to mention preparation time in the morning like showering, shaving, etc and commuting time. Put working hours, morning prep, and commuting time together, and you can easily have a 50-55 hour time commitment there, and that is even a conservative estimate. With such a time commitment, it is understandable that the OP would want support.

Let's review the basic tasks again and what support is out there:

1. Cooking
2. Grocery Shopping
3. Laundry
4. Cleaning

Of the four major categories, the only one that can reasonably and cost effectively be sent off is cleaning. The OP could hire a maid service approximately twice a month. Depending on his neatness level, he can fill in the gaps occasionally, or let the maid service do everything. Even with cleaning off his plate, there's still cooking, grocery shopping, and laundry. Sure, he could eat all meals out and takeout options abound, but is that really the best alternative for living healthy? Not necessarily. There are laundry services, but they are cost prohibitive.

Besides the time commitment for work, OP would need time to go to the gym to look good for prospective dates, get adequate down time on the weekends, and navigate the perilous early stages of dating. All are time commitments.

My basic model of errands also doesn't take into consideration odds and ends errands that come up, like shopping for clothes, coordinating auto repairs, haircuts, or other types of things that naturally come up that can't necessarily be randomly assigned to other people.

Living a single life for any period of time post college is not easy. Most people conveniently overlook the needs of single people, particularly single males. So a little bit of understanding for where the OP is coming from should be due to him. The workplace is demanding more and more time these days, dating properly takes time, as does living a healthy lifestyle. It is understandable why he is crying out for support. A maid service might be a start in the right direction, as well as having a mother or aunt that might be willing to help out with odds and ends errands and maybe a nice home cooked meal from time to time would be good while he looks for a quality dating partner.

asimmons221

The majority of guys my age that I know that are single are for a reason, weather they want to realize it or not.

SezxyStef

I have not read all the responses, but I think a lot of you are being too tough on the OP, if he's genuine.

If you are single and manage a one person household at any time for any period of time beyond a couple of months, you'd realize where he comes from is a perfectly rational place.

Let's say for instance that the OP lives in a one bedroom apartment complex. Since he's in an apartment, when things break, like the sink or the dishwasher, or there is an electrical malfunction, the apartment complex fixes it. He wouldn't have to deal with scheduling plumbers or electricians. That helps. But even after that, there's still laundry, grocery shopping, cooking, and cleaning. That comes on top of working an 40+ hour work, not to mention preparation time in the morning like showering, shaving, etc and commuting time. Put working hours, morning prep, and commuting time together, and you can easily have a 50-55 hour time commitment there, and that is even a conservative estimate. With such a time commitment, it is understandable that the OP would want support.

Let's review the basic tasks again and what support is out there:

1. Cooking
2. Grocery Shopping
3. Laundry
4. Cleaning

Of the four major categories, the only one that can reasonably and cost effectively be sent off is cleaning. The OP could hire a maid service approximately twice a month. Depending on his neatness level, he can fill in the gaps occasionally, or let the maid service do everything. Even with cleaning off his plate, there's still cooking, grocery shopping, and laundry. Sure, he could eat all meals out and takeout options abound, but is that really the best alternative for living healthy? Not necessarily. There are laundry services, but they are cost prohibitive.

Besides the time commitment for work, OP would need time to go to the gym to look good for prospective dates, get adequate down time on the weekends, and navigate the perilous early stages of dating. All are time commitments.

My basic model of errands also doesn't take into consideration odds and ends errands that come up, like shopping for clothes, coordinating auto repairs, haircuts, or other types of things that naturally come up that can't necessarily be randomly assigned to other people.

Living a single life for any period of time post college is not easy. Most people conveniently overlook the needs of single people, particularly single males. So a little bit of understanding for where the OP is coming from should be due to him. The workplace is demanding more and more time these days, dating properly takes time, as does living a healthy lifestyle. It is understandable why he is crying out for support. A maid service might be a start in the right direction, as well as having a mother or aunt that might be willing to help out with odds and ends errands and maybe a nice home cooked meal from time to time would be good while he looks for a quality dating partner.

excuse me as I roflmao...

I was single for a very long time ...14 years...add in a child to that with no child support...a male child at that.

I did everything you mentioned plus took care of a child on my own.

If it is especially hard for a single male to live on their own then their mother didn't do her job.

In all honesty I don't think the OP is being genuine but if he is he is a being a chauvinist and I pity the woman who does eventually take him on.

MM_1982

I'm habitually single (are we allowed to slap people when they ask HOW AREN'T YOU MARRIED?!) I have standards as well, and I tend to not budge much either, hey I'm only 25 I am allowed to be picky! I feel like you shouldn't ever lower your stands on things like education and well being, I can't date someone I cannot converse with, besides intelligence is sexy! If you have things like "must be 5'4' and 12 pounds and a rockin body", time to reevaluate, you might meet a chubby girl with the potential to be 'the one' but you are too close-minded to see past that, and understand that weight can be lost.

So let me get this right. You don't feel you should lower your standards because you're "25 and allowed to be picky"? You also said you won't budge on things like education and well being.

Yet, you want us to lower our standards and date a chubby girl?

Strong logic.

MM_1982

I've been single for over 4 years. I consider myself successful, in shape, attractive, etc.

"I just haven't found the right one."

At what age or point do I settle for less just so I can 'be in a relationship'? It'd be nice to stop doing my laundry every week, stop cooking every meal for myself, stop spending valentines day alone... etc.

I'll echo what the others posters said, get a maid. 100% serious.

I plan to keep my maid even after I get married. She does a great job.

moya_rargh

If you can lift, you can cook and clean. Easily.