Poll: Giving compliments at the gym?
Replies
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I wouldn't walk up to someone in the gym who was in the middle of a workout but I did compliment someone in the locker room the other day. She just happened to be standing next to me while getting ready so I started asking her how long she'd been working out and mentioned that she has a physique I'd love to have.
Unfortunately she was a figure skater for 17 years and has never been overweight so the likelihood of having a physique like hers.. 0% lol0 -
i told this hot asian chick in the gym last night that i was admiring her quads. she loved it0
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These people are just rude. How do you develop and nurture a support system with such rudeness. Is this what you teach your children? No wonder we as a society are in trouble. My goodness!
I teach my kids to respect boundaries. I have social anxiety and I would feel totally weird and creeped out by some random comment about my body. Crazy folks come in all types.0 -
WOW, im just getting too old school to keep up it sounds like. Old days, people... WOMEN included LOVED having people compliment them on their well kept physiques. I work HARD to stay in shape...GUYS know how hard another guy is working to have a thin stomach I LOVE when someone notices my progress
AND I LOVE talking with people I don't put myself in a shell with headphones and "do my thing" and get out of there. You have to be kind to your fellow man. TALK TO PEOPLE BE APPROACHABLE yourself ...It isn't JUST about you. Sorry,, but its not.
How do you ever make friends? Oh let me guess, you don't "need" anymore friends. THAT is the bggest way today you are fooling yourself It says you think youre "all that"
It doesn't mean JUMP in bed with me if someone says wow youre looking great!!
WOW
lol i have to say i'd probably like the gym a little better if i opened my mouth now and then.
I'm all about getting in and out, but it might seem like less of a chore if there was some people i at least said 'hi' to in there lol0 -
After I did a particularly difficult session of lifting weights at the gym, one of those body builder type guys complimented me. He said, "You worked really hard today. Great job!" It was just an off-hand comment in passing, but it really made me feel great! Not that I want anyone watching me or looking, but it is a public forum and people are going to look no matter what. I'm horribly out of shape and have a long way to go to reach my goal weight, but the fact that he took a brief moment to give me that encouragement was awesome. So I guess it really depends on the person. But I like what someone else said, to compliment their workout or their dedication or their strength, as opposed to how they look. I would have been creeped out if that guy had made some comment about my physique.0
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Wow, there are some socially stunted people in the world. It would creep you out for someone to compliment something about your physique ... at the gym ... where you are ostensibly working to improve your physique (please spare me the "I do it for health reasons" diatribe)?
If you have honest intentions, it is unlikely that a person is going to think you're a creep over a compliment. It absolutely makes my freaking day for someone to tell me I have nice legs or shoulders or hamstrings or whatever. I never interpret it as a proposal of marriage, but I'm sort of normal like that.
My advice would be
- Smile, be confident, be friendly.
- Say something like "I can tell you work really hard, and I think that's awesome," as opposed to "You have a great body, and I want to look like you."0 -
It's well intentioned but inappropriate IMO. Just because someone looks in good shape doesn't mean they're doing it in a healthy way, you could be complimenting an eating disorder for all you know.0
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WOW, im just getting too old school to keep up it sounds like. Old days, people... WOMEN included LOVED having people compliment them on their well kept physiques. I work HARD to stay in shape...GUYS know how hard another guy is working to have a thin stomach I LOVE when someone notices my progress
AND I LOVE talking with people I don't put myself in a shell with headphones and "do my thing" and get out of there. You have to be kind to your fellow man. TALK TO PEOPLE BE APPROACHABLE yourself ...It isn't JUST about you. Sorry,, but its not.
How do you ever make friends? Oh let me guess, you don't "need" anymore friends. THAT is the bggest way today you are fooling yourself It says you think youre "all that"
It doesn't mean JUMP in bed with me if someone says wow youre looking great!!
WOW
Strong First Post0 -
OMG it's just a compliment! I love giving and receiving compliments? Since when has it become a bad thing?0
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These people are just rude. How do you develop and nurture a support system with such rudeness. Is this what you teach your children? No wonder we as a society are in trouble. My goodness!
Don't understand the comment. What/who is being rude? If I understand your statement, I am being rude fo rsharing that I have no interest in talking to anyone at the gym?
Please clarify?
Best to all, social or not!0 -
You'd be better off complimenting her accomplishments than her physique. Like "Wow I'm so impressed that you ran the whole time I was working out!" or "Your deadlift numbers are craaaaaazy"
Agree.
I wouldn't compliment a guy, but I would compliment a girl.0 -
I think as long as you don't stare too long with an open mouth and you wipe the drool off first it should be all good... :laugh:0
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Wow! I thought women mostly only felt "creeped out" by men. But no... The answers some of you are giving here make it clear that you're creeped out by other women, too.
My own philosophy is simple: if you really want to talk with someone, do it. But if they're working (like on a job) or working out in a gym, wait until they reach a stopping point unless it's an emergency. And never approach someone from behind if you can avoid it...they might get hurt spinning around too fast.0 -
Meh. Most people who get compliments a lot probably have a big head because they get so many. Why feed in to their egos? If anything why not bring them down to size with a backhanded insult masked as a compliment?
"You look really good for some your age."0 -
I like to tell folks how absolutely amazing they look...then I take a picture and walk away. No one seemed to might, but for some reason my membership was revoked.0
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These people are just rude. How do you develop and nurture a support system with such rudeness. Is this what you teach your children? No wonder we as a society are in trouble. My goodness!
what?where?0 -
I think as long as you don't stare too long with an open mouth and you wipe the drool off first it should be all good... :laugh:
Agreed!0 -
People know why you are at the gym. Commenting on body might be taken as 'cruising' the gym. Dudes know themselves, since I see them staring at the mirror and rubbing their abs to lift the shirt slyly. Women know what they got as they wear those tiny black booty shorts on the treadmill. Focus on yourself and look for inspiration and see aspirational bodies but no need to tell them.0
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I have done it many times in passing. The trick is to not try to make it a conversation, but a statement, and keep going on about your routein.
this.
there is enough over lap at gym to sneak a compliment in with out making it creepy and without making it a full blown conversation/distracting thing.
I get complimented quiet a bit at the gym- and it ranges from over the top/attention sucking annoying things to a simple thumbs up.
I don't like complete strangers doing it- there is a certain "code" of friends (For lack of better words)... they aren't friends- you may not even know their name- but you see them working a lot- you give the head nod- are comfortable moving around them- you are familiar to them.
Then there are complete strangers who you don't know and are behaving oddly.
When odd people say things to me- or creep me- it's odd.
But if it's someone I've seen once or twice- and clearly knows what they are doing- it tends to not bother me- I feel like context is everything.
Context and timing. Doing it in the middle of my set and then hanging around- weird- and annoying.
Context.
Timing.I have done it many times in passing. The trick is to not try to make it a conversation, but a statement, and keep going on about your routein.
seems like there is a lot of wisdom in this. if its just something you say and thats it, you'd have to be a little concieded or parinoid or something to take it as anything other then face value
Thank you,
Op the thing is everyone is different and may or may not take your compliment the way you intend. The biggest thing is for you to be comfortable making the compliment and to not expect anything from the person you are complimenting. Don't expect to become gym buddies, at most you will now exchange a head nod when you see each other in passing.0 -
I like compliments on my outfit or my form but don't generally like comments on my body. I try to give out compliments the same way.
I think the rule of thumb is that people who are lingering with no headphones are interested in a compliment or chat. People with headphones in are generally trying to avoid interaction and stay focused.0 -
Curious: how did something at started out as a poll turn in to an attack on those of us that are more introverted or aren't interested to talking to people while we work out?
Best!0 -
I think it depends on the situation. If it was a girl I'd actually smile and say thanks. If it was a guy, I guess I'd probably be flattered as long as I hadn't noticed him creeping and he didn't stare after the comment! I also hang out mostly in the Free Weights area at my gym so I'm usually looking nice and pumped!
I actually think I'd be more comfortable getting a compliment from someone at the gym than from people outside in the 'real world'. I think because everyone is at the gym for the same ultimate goal - to look good and to feel good.
There are 3 women in my team at work and they bring up my weight every day now. The first time I liked it and smiled because it meant it was getting noticeable but now they mention how slim I am every single day, and it makes me uncomfortable, like they are looking for every small change every day and watching me. I still have 20lbs to go so this is going to start getting awkard. I just nod now and say thanks and change the subject.0 -
OMG it's just a compliment! I love giving and receiving compliments? Since when has it become a bad thing?0
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I once told a guy as he was going into the gym that his cologne smelled good. He now winks at me and calls me sweetheart. He never offered to buy me any C4 so I think he is not interested. Maybe I will compliment his glutes never.0
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I think it depends on how you approach it. For example, there is a guy who started coming to the gym at the same time I did, he was extremly over weight and apparently very new to exercise. After about 3 months I (and others) noticed the great progress he had made. I simply commented on his progress and he said Thank You.
I would not do this with a woman however due to the creepiness factor.0 -
I see a lot of negativity here, but really enjoyed the positive responses. I agree with a lot of the posters in that I do not want to talk to anyone in the middle of my workout. I try to keep things fast paced to keep me breathing hard with short breaks.
That being said, I also prefer a more social gym environment where I can make like-minded friends or acquaintances. The gym crowd can become a sort of support network. Please do come talk to me, just not when I'm in the middle of something.
As for the specific question on body compliments, I would just stay away from that. You are only going to come across as hitting on the person, or just generally weird. What you can do, as a previous poster said, is to compliment someone on their progress (say you've seen them make leaps and bounds over the last few months). Asking a specific question, such as, "Why do you take your shoes off to do squats," is also a good way to go.
Finally, to all the girls out there who think every guy in the gym is ogling them, get over yourself. Unless you have an amazing body in a very revealing outfit, it is probably just your imagination. And don't worry, I won't come compliment you on your amazing body, I can tell by your body language and that horrible expression on your face that you don't want to talk.0 -
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I don't like complete strangers doing it- there is a certain "code" of friends (For lack of better words)... they aren't friends- you may not even know their name- but you see them working a lot- you give the head nod- are comfortable moving around them- you are familiar to them.
....Context and timing. Doing it in the middle of my set and then hanging around- weird- and annoying.
Great explanation! I go to the gym at 4:30 am, so us handful of regulars at this time "know" each other, even if not by name. Most of them have complimented me over the last couple of months because my weight loss and strength progress is pretty evident. I love hearing it, and no one has made it creepy or tried to turn it into a long conversation that gets in the way of my workout. Once a newbie (older woman than me, clearly way out of shape) said to me "I aspire to be on there as long as you are!", referring to my elliptical that day. So, I replied to the lady, "Just keep at it, I couldn't do anything like this 6 months ago." ME?! I was an inspiration to someone else?! Whoa. I thought that was awesome!0 -
Curious: how did something at started out as a poll turn in to an attack on those of us that are more introverted or aren't interested to talking to people while we work out?
Best!
^This!^0 -
I am a friendly complimenter in life, I hug my friends (probably guys more than girls) however in the gym/exercise situation, I am careful Compliments there are body related and I really dont EVER want to make someone feel uncomfortable. So I error on the side of caution and not being a "creep".
Here on MFP, I really like friends with kick *kitten* diaries that I learn from, who work out hard, share ideas, they push me by example. Frankly, some are smokin. I dont say anything, because I dont want to lose friends like that and I could if I made them feel uncomfortable.0
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