what women shouldn't do on the first date...

MizTerry

Go into labor. Total mood killer.

shedoos

How do we destroy it?

It's pretty much the same thing for women as it is for men.

You destroy it my not treating the person you are on a date with as you could any other human being: with courtesy, respect and plain common decency. If you relax, enjoy yourself and have no expectations on the outcome of the date you will normally have a great time.

When I go out with my friends I always offer to buy a drink or get a round in - why would it be different for a date?
When I go out with friends I quite naturally hold doors open - why would it be different for a date?
When I go out with friends I have no other motivation but to enjoy myself and be in their company - why would it be different for a date?

Dating doesn't have to suck.

:flowerforyou: :flowerforyou:

amaysngrace

Talk about an ex.
Nag about trivial things.
Pass gas.

Hey, Dr. Oz says everyone passes gas at least 14 times a day. EVERYONE! :bigsmile:

bperkins88

Talk About the Ex. -shakes head violently- Not attractive

No, but sometimes relevant. I WILL talk about my kids on a first date. Because if the guy I'm dating isn't cool with kids, then there's no point in a second date. And due to the fact that my ex chose no custody in the divorce, and I have them full time. Talking about the ex, a bit as backstory to why I have the kids full time, is an important piece of who I am, and my level of freedom to date.

And I'll aways offer to pay on a date. But I've never actually had anyone take me up on that.

Yeah , that makes sense and I do not mind that. It's when the girl is single, has no children and wants to blab about how her ex did this, or did that to her on the first date that is a turn off. I've dated a few women who had children, and they talked about her children up front and I appreciated that fact that they did that, so I was aware of the situation I may be getting into. I should have been more articulate about my standings I suppose. haha

CarmenLourens28

expect the guy to pay...

Because nothing's classier than a guy asking a woman out for a first date and then expecting to divvy things up when the check comes.

LOL HI 5 Girl

jennifer_417

I will never understand women who offer to pay...then get offended when her date allows her to do so. Disingenuous at best.

raisealittlehell

Wow y'all make dating complicated. When you impose "rules" on yourself you are basically setting the date up to fail. As someone else wrote- use your manners, common respect/decency and common sense.

I always offer to pay my share. Why *should* I expect the guy to pay? If he wants to, than great, I usually will try to slip in a way to pay for something else, like parking/coffee etc. Dating is expensive and unless you each are independently wealthy, being prepared to help cover some of the costs is just common sense (to me anyways).

Look at him when you talk, keep your phone on silent and away (if you need to keep it on for some reason, than at least have the courtesy to explain that in case it rings while your having a conversation) you can text your friends after and post as many bathroom selfies as you want when your alone.

BE YOURSELF. If you knew the guy was pretending to be someone else on the date what would your reaction be? That he's as a**hole, jerk, etc. So why is that any different for you? Be who you are that way you don't have to worry later on if the likes you for you, or for the *you* you pretended to be,

Have fun- this isn't rocket science or brain surgery, go out, have a good time, get to know someone and if there's chemistry, great, and if not- well at least you had a good time.

ALSO- Always remember to say THANK YOU. Just because a guy asked out doesn't mean that everything he does is just whats expected. If he pays for dinner, say thank you, same with if he opens the door. Common courtesy goes a long way and I am shocked by the amount of girls I have seen on dates that don't say those simply two words.

Also for those saying if he pays you have to put out, etc. You are an adult. If you want to shack up on the first date because you are both feeling it- great. If you don't, than you have the right to say no. If a guy isn't going to call you back or won't take no for an answer, then you obviously will get a huge insight into his character and how he would treat you down the road.

Cranquistador

Go into labor. Total mood killer.

:laugh:

wolverine66

Go into labor. Total mood killer.

But at least we know you put out, so those cancel each other out.

Cranquistador

I can't believe frick and frack haven't shown up yet.

SHHHHHHHH dont say their names 3 times.

Mia_RagazzaTosta

I can't believe frick and frack haven't shown up yet.

SHHHHHHHH dont say their names 3 times.

Beetlejuice!

BrainyBurro

don't have sex with the waiter in front of me while we're waiting for the entrees to arrive.

same goes for bartender, valet, busboy, cashier... better yet, pretty much anybody else we might encounter while on the date.

'cause i REALLY hate when that happens!

SexKittenlovesitrough

When you date me, this is what you get....

If the place you are taking me is 30-50 dollars a plate, I am dressed in a dress with expensive shoes, tasteful make up and accessories.

If the place is 15-29 a plate, then I am in a business casual suit (skirt and blouse combo or slacks and blouse) again great shoes, nice make up and accesories

if the place is 8-15 dollars a plate I'm in jeans and a nice top (not a tee), my nice flats or boots, again tasteful make up and accessories...

I always ask what you are having and order a plate that costs less than yours does. I do not order a drink until you do, if you order water, I order water. If you order a drink I order a glass of wine.

I never talk about my ex, unless you've asked me a question about my child that requires me talking about my ex. I do not ask about yours, but may ask about your child which would prompt some back history.

I always offer to pay, I have never been taken up on it.

I am almost always over dressed since it seems that no matter what the cost of the plate, men wear jeans and a ball cap. (which I don't understand....don't you want to impress me too?)

I prefer a coffee for a first date. It's quick, short and I can easily bail if it's not working out.

I think highly of you if you open my door or hold my elbow when I'm walking across an icy parking lot.

You do NOT get sex the first night. You should expect and know this. I have a child at home it makes sense you aren't coming to my place. I have a child at home, it makes sense i'm paying for a babysitter by the hour and I'm not coming to your place for a "nightcap".

I will not text or call you after, except for one brief text/email saying I had a good/great time (if I did) and that I was glad for the opportunity to meet you.

Once I send that, I will not reach out again until YOU do.

If you don't, I assume you didn't have a great time and I am ok with that.

I don't invest too much into the first date. It's like the pre interview of a job interview. You're just scoping out the field. So am I, so realise that I have other fish in the sea and if this looks like it's heading somewhere, THEN I will stop fishing.

skullshank

dont throw yourself at my junk.
i will decide by the nights end if we're hooking up and what exactly i will let you do to me.
if you're too persistent about it, you come off like a slore and you might not get a callback.

catneon

If a man is stupid enough to buy me a drink, buy me dinner, or otherwise pay for my **** that's on him. Regardless of whether he pays for dinner, you don't owe him sex, intimacy, or anything else. I just never offer to pay and if he insists on going splitsies, I just excuse myself to the bathroom and sneak out of the restaurant.

catneon

don't have sex with the waiter in front of me while we're waiting for the entrees to arrive.

same goes for bartender, valet, busboy, cashier... better yet, pretty much anybody else we might encounter while on the date.

'cause i REALLY hate when that happens!

But...but you said you liked to watch??????

Sovictorrious

Bring her baby?

jackpotclown

reveal all the voices in her head at once
take you to see all her cats, how she named them, and why she puts sweaters on to keep them warm
sit bowl-legged and tell you how by the miracles of science that she just became a woman
spend the night going on in her baby voice, all while giving you a cutesy wootsy nickname
\m/

lauren3101

I really hope I never have to go on a first date again. Between this thread and the 'how soon should I text him' thread the other day, all these 'rules' are making my head spin!