what women shouldn't do on the first date...
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Eat with their mouth open...in fact, nobody should do that. EVER!0
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On the first date
-Don't talk money/income
-Leave the ex commentary for a later conversation
-Don't bring your kids
-Turn off your phone (if you have kids, discuss that fact that you need to check-in periodically. If you can't turn your phone off, let it go to voice mail ......don't go on the date.)
One should try to be kind, thoughtful and honest but not rude.
Coffee is a great first date.
If it's not clicking, spill your coffee and excuse yourself.0 -
NO sex on the first date, unless you're a hooker or want to look like one. Have some class, get to know the guy and devellop a relationship of some sort with him first.
I have had sex on the first date
omg it was awesome
we were together about 6 years after that
I guess he liked hookers eh?
:noway: btw nothing wrong with sex work and attempting to shame people by calling them "hookers" is pretty sad0 -
Eat with their mouth open...in fact, nobody should do that. EVER!
...werd!
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So... like... paying for the hotel and being naked in less than an hour is probably a no no?
yeah.
no guy wants that.
none.
ever.0 -
So... like... paying for the hotel and being naked in less than an hour is probably a no no?
yeah.
no guy wants that.
none.
ever.
ummm... good to know0 -
Here's one for you, Setting at a table in a nice restaurant in the middle of dinner, first date. In a condescending tone tell him that when he sends you flowers at work that he should deliver them in person because a delivery service is tacky.
Check please! LoL0 -
fart0
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Start discussing names for girls and boys with your date.0
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Was in to learn a little as I am recently on the dating scene....after reading this....
:sad: :noway: fu*k dating I will become a nun....*kitten* can you say fu*k if you are a nun?
Seriously though I have been just being myself, and trying my best to relax and enjoy his company. I do get nervous and say off the wall things but I have been trying to play it off. I suck at clothes stuff and since I have lost the first chunk of my weight I am getting more into style but I just wear what I think I look pretty in, dunno if that's wrong or you are supposed to wear certain things to certain places but oh well. My parents taught me how to be respectful and ladylike when meeting any new person and I suppose that would include dates as well. Once again not sure if I am doing it "right" lol especially since I am still single but I guess it will do for now. :blushing:0 -
Ladies....take notes. This is how it's done.When you date me, this is what you get....
If the place you are taking me is 30-50 dollars a plate, I am dressed in a dress with expensive shoes, tasteful make up and accessories.
If the place is 15-29 a plate, then I am in a business casual suit (skirt and blouse combo or slacks and blouse) again great shoes, nice make up and accesories
if the place is 8-15 dollars a plate I'm in jeans and a nice top (not a tee), my nice flats or boots, again tasteful make up and accessories...
I always ask what you are having and order a plate that costs less than yours does. I do not order a drink until you do, if you order water, I order water. If you order a drink I order a glass of wine.
I never talk about my ex, unless you've asked me a question about my child that requires me talking about my ex. I do not ask about yours, but may ask about your child which would prompt some back history.
I always offer to pay, I have never been taken up on it.
I am almost always over dressed since it seems that no matter what the cost of the plate, men wear jeans and a ball cap. (which I don't understand....don't you want to impress me too?)
I prefer a coffee for a first date. It's quick, short and I can easily bail if it's not working out.
I think highly of you if you open my door or hold my elbow when I'm walking across an icy parking lot.
You do NOT get sex the first night. You should expect and know this. I have a child at home it makes sense you aren't coming to my place. I have a child at home, it makes sense i'm paying for a babysitter by the hour and I'm not coming to your place for a "nightcap".
I will not text or call you after, except for one brief text/email saying I had a good/great time (if I did) and that I was glad for the opportunity to meet you.
Once I send that, I will not reach out again until YOU do.
If you don't, I assume you didn't have a great time and I am ok with that.
I don't invest too much into the first date. It's like the pre interview of a job interview. You're just scoping out the field. So am I, so realise that I have other fish in the sea and if this looks like it's heading somewhere, THEN I will stop fishing.
A couple things to add:
Do NOT be all demanding that men open doors for you, help you with your coat, pull out your chair, etc. If you want to be treated like a lady, act like a woman, not a spoiled princess. If you like that kind of stuff, mention it later. Some women like it, some don't, we don't know. Just don't be demanding about it.
When you are discussing where to go, if the guy asks you for input try to be a little bit helpful. Try not to say "I don't care", you don't have to pick the place but if you hate sushi or are a vegetarian or something then say that. I'm perfectly fine picking the place but I also want to go somewhere you feel comfortable. Plus I want to see your communicating and decision making skills.
Don't come on too strong, if we think you like us too much the challenge will be gone and we will like you less. It's not our fault, women do this too. Just play it cool, act like your having a good time but try to remain a little bit of a mystery.
If you meet someone somewhere and you get there early, let them know. This happened to me once, she showed up early, I didn't see her or recognize her from here pictures, and we both ended up getting a table. That's what text messaging was invented for.
Is it really, though? I read through that thinking 'oh my god, too many things to remember'. I'd spend all night worrying if I'd remembered or stuck to all the 'rules'. Surely the idea of a date is to relax and enjoy yourself?
yes it is....it really is....
for him...and for me... this is really how it's done for some of us.
that being said, if the conversation is good and the person I'm sitting down with sharing a meal, is a great guy with a good conversational flair and sense of humor then I have a GREAT time. I know how to relax.
so it doesn't work for you...that's cool...you do you.....ultimately that is what works...
I just put out there what I do...and someone agreed with me on it. You don't have to date him or me.
that's all.
:flowerforyou:
You've taken that a little defensively, it seems. Trust me, you aren't my type. :laugh: I put my opinion out there just like you did, and most of what you said I consider common sense, but it was the ordering thing that got me. If the most expensive thing on the menu is what I happen to fancy that day, then I'm going to order it. I always offer to pay, anyway. And if I fancy a glass of wine after a long week at work, I'm going to have one, whether he's a water drinker or not. If he can't hack that, he's not my type anyway. :flowerforyou:0 -
So... like... paying for the hotel and being naked in less than an hour is probably a no no?
yeah.
no guy wants that.
none.
ever.
ummm... good to know
mmmmm, good times. I know I loved every minute of it. I mean, what? Who would do such things 
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expect the guy to pay...
Because nothing's classier than a guy asking a woman out for a first date and then expecting to divvy things up when the check comes.
it's 2014. lots of women have jobs now, so i hear. some even drive.
the guy didn't say "go halvsies." he said "expect the guy to pay." so ladies, offer to pay. offer. do you know how awesome that is for us when you even just offer to pay??
but you know, if the girl insists on buying expensive food and drinks or whatever, she should definitely throw down some cash. like a whole "let me get this round" is really really nice.
I agree with that. Though I DO like being treated (who doesn't?!), my BF and I have agreed to split the bill when going out for dinner, movies, buying groceries etc. It just makes it so much easier, and there's no guilt when the guy always insists to pay (often times with resentment building up). What I don't understand is when I see women very big in the feminist movement, yet expect men to pay for their food etc as if the man was the only one bringing home the money. It's a two way street.0 -
I can't believe I'm so late to this party! For the love of gravy, Rape Culture came up on the very first page! It's like an MFP Record of awesome!!!
It amuses me how the issue of payment is so very awkward... The fact that some women don't offer to pay dumbfounds me. The fact that some men feel obligated to always pay dumbfounds me as well. If your parents raised you that way, I applaud them for believing in chivalry, but... it's 2013. The ladies should pick up the check every now and then too. Believe it or not, some of us like to do that for our men folk.
ETA: Hey look!!!! It's 2014!!!!! LOL
oops.0 -
So... like... paying for the hotel and being naked in less than an hour is probably a no no?
yeah.
no guy wants that.
none.
ever.
ummm... good to know
mmmmm, good times. I know I loved every minute of it. I mean, what? Who would do such things
haha! So did I! I mean... not me! I'D NEVER DO THAT!
Oh... and I'd certainly not do it on the SECOND date either! No sirree!0 -
I can't believe I'm so late to this party! For the love of gravy, Rape Culture came up on the very first page! It's like an MFP Record of awesome!!!
It amuses me how the issue of payment is so very awkward... The fact that some women don't offer to pay dumbfounds me. The fact that some men feel obligated to always pay dumbfounds me as well. If your parents raised you that way, I applaud them for believing in chivalry, but... it's 2013. The ladies should pick up the check every now and then too. Believe it or not, some of us like to do that for our men folk.
ETA: Hey look!!!! It's 2014!!!!! LOL
oops.
^^THIS^^
Just relax, enjoy the date, and offer. If the guy accepts, then fine. If not, feel good and go on. Just be yourself - whoever that is!0 -
Call me old fashioned or whatever.......But when I was dating I would always pay.....at least on first couple of dates....It's great when they would offer.....but I was still picking it up. It's just how I was raised......and my son will be raised to do the same.0
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Spit.0
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Call me old fashioned or whatever.......But when I was dating I would always pay.....at least on first couple of dates....It's great when they would offer.....but I was still picking it up. It's just how I was raised......and my son will be raised to do the same.
And I, for one, thank you for that.0 -
Call me old fashioned or whatever.......But when I was dating I would always pay.....at least on first couple of dates....It's great when they would offer.....but I was still picking it up. It's just how I was raised......and my son will be raised to do the same.
And I, for one, thank you for that.
are you planning on dating his son? :huh:0
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