How much should you tip your professor after finals?

mrphil86

C'mon, look at these references:

REFERENCES:

De Beers, F. 1980. "Establishing Arbitrary Rules of Thumb in the Diamond Market," Journal of Worldwide Monopolies, Capetown, South Africa, Vol 45, No. 2, pp 15-27.

Greenspan, A. 1992. "****ing with the U.S. Economy," in Proceedings of The World Economy as a Board Game, Washington D.C., Vol 2, pp 120-134.

O'Neill T. (Tip). 1987. "Congressional Ethics and Other Myths," Journal for Retired Congressmen, Cayman Islands, Vol 26, 787 pp 1-245.

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Taking any ethical advice from those people (Especially De Beers) would be like getting medical advice from a witch doctor.

And.. and...

Advanced Academic Tipping
True success in graduate studies comes from mastery of the tipping "gray areas." These are highly variable between universities, but some of the more common situations are listed below.

Do Tip the department chairman when you are accepted into graduate school, particularly in the fields of law and medicine.

Don't Tip if you are accepted into any arts or science graduate program (lack of future employment options).

Do Tip (about $10) after weekly meetings with your thesis advisor.

Don't Tip after weekly meetings with your thesis advisor if a large amount of additional work is assigned.

Do Tip your advisor if he or she attends your graduation.

Don't Tip your parents, spouse, or lover for attending your graduation.

Do Tip your research advisor if support funding for you is included in any of his or her successful grant proposals.

Don't Tip your advisor if your role in the research grant is that of "subject."

Do Tip journal editors when submitting articles for publication. Size of the tip should be in proportion to how fast you would like the article to be published. Make the editor aware that you are also interested in tipping the hard-working peer reviewers.

Don't Tip people you date (unless, of course, you and your date had previously negotiated some type of financial arrangement).4

Do Tip the department secretary on a weekly basis if you ever expect to accomplish anything in graduate school.
Don't Tip professors with Rubles, Green Stamps, Silverado common stock or other useless currencies. Food stamps may suffice under extraordinary circumstances.

At this juncture many prospective graduate students may be wondering how they can afford to tip the amounts required to assure the best quality education. The best advice is try to win an appointment as a teaching assistant. (A generous tip to the Department Chair will help achiever this goal.) Teaching assistants have the opportunity to earn tips from their undergraduate students (who also hope to earn tips from their parents for good grades). Place a glass fish bowl near the door and prime it with a $5 bill.5 Naturally, bigger classes are much more desirable to teach that marginally populated specialty classes. Expect to see similar trends in graduate school.

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It's obviously satire and this trolling is being way over played.

Fishshtick

I think it's OK to tip just a bit more than you would a police officer or border control agent. Most won't make a big deal of it if you give the standard cop tip, but it's nice to recognize the extra years of education when you can.

bd0027

A slow jack is usually sufficient for mine.

Perplexities

A slow jack is usually sufficient for mine.

Isn't that... unethical?

TheRoadDog

Wouldn't it make more sense to tip your Professor BEFORE the final?

Tip? Bribe? It's a fine line.

meeka472

Wouldn't it make more sense to tip your Professor BEFORE the final?

Of course but only if you need assurance that you'll get a high grade on the final. Personally, I find cash works better and that your tipping should be done in private so that the professor can better appreciate your gesture.

Hendrix7

craftywitch_63

TIP MY PROFESSOR?!? The privilege of teaching me should be tip enough!

RosemaryEBrown

Better tip your English prof. It's "you're confused" NOT "your confused".

Perplexities

Better tip your English prof. It's "you're confused" NOT "your confused".

Aw, rose.

I think you're confused again.

Thanks for the tip though, kind regards.

- Chlamydibrah