Everything in moderation

Helloitsdan

You've got to be kidding me.

First off brotha, you're barking up the wrong tree. My post doesn't contain the word "binge" once. Take it up with someone who was having that debate.

You're talking to a person who doesn't associated moral concepts with food anymore. I let all that go. I don't "reward" myself with food, I don't "love" food, and I associate neither guilt nor shame with my food choices.

I simply stated that the roads I took to freedom were not traveled by your "eat one serving size a day" method of moderation. That's awful advice for me, and I'm thankful that I kept it real about my strengths, my weaknesses, and created roads that worked perfectly for me.

And where, do tell, did I "blame" food for gaining 140lbs? My *kitten* earned every pound by what I put in my mouth. You made an assumption, and picked the wrong damn man. I have NEVER had excuses about my weight, and have never been the one to blame anyone else. What I said is that I took the "everything in moderation" path that you think is the road to Glory, and I gained 140lbs on that path. It was a BAD road for me. But that doesn't excuse the fact that I took the road, that I failed at it, and that it was my choices that landed me hot water.

Perhaps if you spent a little less time being so self righteous and assumptive you'd learn something about other people, their journeys, and their successful methods.

Im neither self rites or assumptive, and i'm learning plenty!
This post was a test to see how many people lose their **** at the word "Moderation".

mod·er·a·tion
ˌmädəˈrāSHən/Submit
noun
1.
the avoidance of excess or extremes, esp. in one's behavior or political opinions.
"he urged the police to show moderation"
synonyms: self-restraint, restraint, self-control, self-command, self-discipline;

I have immense respect for someone who's lost any amount of weight against all odds!
Especially 130lbs! Thats almost a whole me!
But just by admitting "I certainly do not define "moderation" the way the OP does, or lots of people around here. Been there, done that, and I gained 140lbs doing so." Shows that there are underlying issues. Thats all!
People think i'm bashing them because I have Ben and Jerry's every night, or can have the 3 Oreo's.
I learned early that if I cut out whole foods i'll obsess and THAT doesn't make me happy.
Eating the food does!
In moderation.

parkscs

People think i'm bashing them because I have Ben and Jerry's every night, or can have the 3 Oreo's.
I learned early that if I cut out whole foods i'll obsess and THAT doesn't make me happy.
Eating the food does!
In moderation.

Pretty sure no one cares what you eat every night. People are just are saying that your advice is poor advice for them personally. When they say they don't want to incorporate a regular portion of Ben and Jerry's into their own diet, you're telling them to get help with their eating disorders. Why do you care if they eat dessert or decide to skip it? Just because they intentionally do not stock up on cookies doesn't mean they're unhappy with what they eat nor does it mean they have an eating disorder nor does it mean they "need help." It just means they don't want the temptation to snack on desserts laying around their house.

I think at the end of the day you value your oreos and other sweets more than most people, and there's nothing wrong with that, but realize that's not everyone. I haven't had an oreo since... I don't know, high school? I had Ben and Jerry's when I had my tonsils taken out in graduate school, but I don't know that I've had any since then. Is it tasty? Sure. Do I obsess when I don't eat it? Not at all. If I stocked it up in my fridge at home, would I eat it on a regular basis? Yes, I would. Do I need those empty calories in my diet? No way.

In short, you're really pushing what worked for you on other people (and telling them they need help when they disagree with you is just comical), but what worked for you is not necessarily the best route for everyone else.

geebusuk

The fact that you might have trigger foods doesn't absolve you from responsibility. People ARE taking responsibility by recognizing that they need to avoid certain foods and by not bringing them into the house.

I wasn't trying to absolve myself from responsibility.
You will note my comments are directed against HFCS as the evil bogey monster.

ChaplainHeavin

Most people do not listen with the intent to understand; they listen with the intent to reply.
(Stephen R. Covey).

Timshel_

The issue is, people don't want moderation. They don't want to have the understanding that they will NOT be able to eat with reckless abandon and maintain a healthy weight. Actually, most people I see starting here are looking for the fastest way to lose weight, which leads them to demonize foods, practices, and common sense really. That is the crux of the issue.

The hardest, more cruel slap of reality is, you CANNOT just eat what you want, when you want, in any amount you want. There are rules and limits. You also can't deny that exercise improves your body, but also lets you enjoy MORE of what you want, when you want, and in bigger amounts than if you do not exercise.

THAT is the truth of it.

geebusuk

People think i'm bashing them because I have Ben and Jerry's every night, or can have the 3 Oreo's.
I learned early that if I cut out whole foods i'll obsess and THAT doesn't make me happy.
Eating the food does!
In moderation.

From my point of view, it's more a case that you're offering bad advice.
I often eat a whole tub of icecream in a night (err, ok, not having a working freezer this moment may be part of that). This is while losing 2lb/week. Soon be getting to bulk and could go for a tub of B&J every night fine then.
But that doesn't mean your advice is good for me.

As has been discussed - it's like telling a gambling addict "just gamble a LITTLE bit and you'll be happy".
Can't see that sort of advice going down well, really.

Iwishyouwell

But just by admitting "I certainly do not define "moderation" the way the OP does, or lots of people around here. Been there, done that, and I gained 140lbs doing so." Shows that there are underlying issues. Thats all!

So basically we're back at square one.

You believe that if people don't practice "moderation" in the way you do, they have "underlying issues".

Nobody is debating with you because you believe in having 3 oreos or a single serving of B&J a night. Nobody on this board cares what you put down your gullet.

They're after you because you have the audacity to speak for other people's relationship with food, and frankly have no idea what the hell you're talking about.

I learned early that if I cut out whole foods i'll obsess and THAT doesn't make me happy.
Eating the food does!
In moderation.

I don't "obsess" over food. I haven't had that kind of unfortunate relationship with food in years.

But yes, you, who needs to eat 3 oreos a night in order to not "obsess" over food feels worthy to diagnose other people over the internet.

#irony

Erin_goBrahScience

LVCeltGirl

Chiming in although quite late and just highlighting my experience. I've always been an "all or nothing" kind of person until recently. For whatever reason, having gallbladder removal surgery (plus the pain that led to it, etc) really threw me for a loop (I'm still in the adjustment period as the surgery was only two weeks ago). I'm definitely one of those type people that if I deny myself (or am told I must deny myself) then all I think about is that food. For example: After surgery, somehow I got it in my head from being told to watch the fat content of what I eat for the next few weeks that I could not have a Hot Dog. The craving kicked in about 4 days after the surgery. I wanted nothing more than a stupid Hot Dog. Finally broke down and got a hot dog at Costco Food Court (I figured if I didn't finish it I wasn't wasting too much money) yesterday. Ate between 1/2 to 3/4 of that hot dog, no ill effects and honestly no desire to have another Hot Dog anytime in the near future.


Same with Soda, Ice Cream, Pizza, Zeppoles, etc. If I say "I can't have", then I want like there is no tomorrow. I also agree with some of the other posts, there are certain foods that if I'm going to have, I need to buy in an amount that allows for moderation. So Peanut Butter Cups must be a single serving package or I'll eat all of them. Ben and Jerry's is a treat and often I'll go get a cone (or a cup) instead of getting the pint at the store.

It is about moderation, about allowing for the occasional "cheat" if the "cheat" isn't an addiction. That should cover the diabetic that will not cut out the sugar (which can be deadly to the diabetic) or the alcoholic that won't cut out the alcohol. If it's such a trigger that it could severely hurt you, then there is no choice but to cut it out.

toutmonpossible

The fact that you might have trigger foods doesn't absolve you from responsibility. People ARE taking responsibility by recognizing that they need to avoid certain foods and by not bringing them into the house.

I wasn't trying to absolve myself from responsibility.
You will note my comments are directed against HFCS as the evil bogey monster.

I thought you were taking about the attitude of people in general. My comment wasn't directed at you personally. I'm sorry if you received that impression.

toutmonpossible

The hardest, more cruel slap of reality is, you CANNOT just eat what you want, when you want, in any amount you want. There are rules and limits.

Yes, we understand that there are limits. Which means that if there are particular restrictions that are exceptionally stressful and at which we often fail at applying it's better to avoid those restrictions whenever possible. For some people, that means pretty much eliminating certain foods.

I've maintained my weight well into middle age. My weight creeps up from time to time and I work to get it back down, but I have always been at a medically healthy weight. But I have relatives who are obese, have serious medical problems because of obesity who insist that I "should" be able to eat things in moderation. If I eat too much buttery, sugary food, I start pigging out.

Exercising judgment based on observation of how I react to food has worked for me. I'm not interested in eating myself moderately into obesity, Type II diabetes, and senile dementia (all problems with family members that were caused, or exacerbated, by obesity).