What is your WHY?

Oklahomared58

I posted this a few months back, when a similar question was asked.
My hope in sharing this is that some of you younger couples on this site decide to make a change in your health/lifestyles before you end up on this same path as I.

"July 25th, 2010 I stepped on the scales and weighted 282. 27 days later my wife of 33 years died. That day ended her 10 year battle with breast cancer and her life-long battle with obesity. Like me, she had been overweight almost all of her life, she had been 100+lbs heavy since she was a child. She had all the weight related health problems; type 2 diabetes, high blood pressure, joint problems, reproductive issues, stomach problems, etc. In my heart I feel the weight kept her from beating back the cancer that eventually took her life. Met her at when I was 16, moved in at 17, married her at 18, and now she was gone. Everything we had planned and saved for, to do later in life was gone too.
I felt that if I didn’t change something, I was next; and both of our lives would have somehow been a waste. "

cochrantimothy

I beat myself up on a regular with the why's, trying to figure out why i choose a cheeseburger over chicken, why i drink soda, why i sit around instead of working out, i love healthy food and excersise and am learning to like water, but why do i choose the bad over the good? Sometimes its money sometimes its being lazy and other times its what i have programmed myself to do, so its subconscious decisions. I fight this everyday, i have been up and i have been down, and i am sick of it..... my Why is what i search for and i know part, im tired of being the fat guy, im tired of being angry all the time and feeling like i dont deserve any better, im tired of sweating when i go to the grocery store. I fear the diabetes and heart disease that runs in my family, i want to get married and have kids without fearing that i wont live long enough to truly appreciate it. I want to be a role model to my family friends and coworkers and to feel like i can finally beat the monster that holds me hostage. Every where i look there is a why and finally i will let he why's bring me through and help me succeed.

ajax041813

My WHY:

1. To have more energy and be happier on a daily basis
2. To be the healthiest I can for when we are ready to start a family.
3. To make pregnancy & labor as easy as possible on myself
4. To be able to perform aerial silks one day.
5. To live a longer & fuller life with my soon to be husband.
6. To prevent as many diseases as possible.

I think that is a good list! I've only been doing Keto & working out for a week and I am already reaping the benefits! More energy, generally happier, getting things done around the house is much easier, experiencing these small joys can help keep me going!

MikePXstream

I think you have some solid reasons why listed there. Let those fuel you to better yourself. I challenge you to take it one step further. What will it "feel" like to you to be able to go to the grocery store without sweating, to be happy instead of angry, to be that role model for your family? Really think about this, write it down if you have to. It has been my experience that when you understand why you are doing it and how you will feel when meeting those personal goals, you will have more drive and excitement to keep going and push yourself.

Thank you for sharing!

I beat myself up on a regular with the why's, trying to figure out why i choose a cheeseburger over chicken, why i drink soda, why i sit around instead of working out, i love healthy food and excersise and am learning to like water, but why do i choose the bad over the good? Sometimes its money sometimes its being lazy and other times its what i have programmed myself to do, so its subconscious decisions. I fight this everyday, i have been up and i have been down, and i am sick of it..... my Why is what i search for and i know part, im tired of being the fat guy, im tired of being angry all the time and feeling like i dont deserve any better, im tired of sweating when i go to the grocery store. I fear the diabetes and heart disease that runs in my family, i want to get married and have kids without fearing that i wont live long enough to truly appreciate it. I want to be a role model to my family friends and coworkers and to feel like i can finally beat the monster that holds me hostage. Every where i look there is a why and finally i will let he why's bring me through and help me succeed.

MikePXstream

Hey everyone. Sorry I haven't been on for a while. Been dealing with the whole house selling, buying thing. Definitely time consuming and stressful. How is everyone doing out there? Are you sticking to your goals and moving forward?

MikePXstream

Good evening MFP! How was your weekend. I hope it was fun and relaxing. I found myself troubled this past weekend, as I was starting to lose some of my drive. I'm sure a lot of it is stress related and not taking or making the time to exercise like I normally do. So I started thinking a bit broader. Sure I have my why, which was the main start of this conversation and sharing it all with you, but then I started thinking about how. How do you pick yourself up and do what you must so that you can fulfill that greater why? For me, it was trying something new. I have my usual group that comes together and we share our triumphs and stumbles, but sometimes you have to really switch it up a bit. So, after talking with my wife, my boy and I signed up with the local running team. I wasn't exactly sure what I was getting myself into, but it was different, with a group of people that I kind of know, along with some kids to be a role model for and inspire to be young and active. It was great. I haven't pushed myself that hard in a training run in a long time. What's even better is that it re-kindled my drive and passion for being fit and healthy and lifted me back up.

My point is this. If you find yourself slowly drifting down that path or "Not today, maybe tomorrow," find something or someone t0 switch it up for you. That little change might just be enough to show you how to get back on track.

Have any of you experienced or done something similar?

MikePXstream

Well, it looks like this thread might have finally reached its' end, but that is okay. Thank you to everyone that shared your reasoning for why you want to better yourself. If your reasons have changed, please continue to share. You never know if your story might just inpsire others.

Have a great day everyone!

MikePXstream

Hey Everyone, Just checking to see if anyone's "why" has changed or if they have discovered their true why to making the choice to live a healthier life.

Lucy020679

I've jumped from the wagon a few times but this time my motivation is different. I've been put on medication for acne that could increase my cholesterol and because I'm overweight it was already on the high side. If the medication makes my cholesterol go too high they'll take me off it and after doing 7 months of antibiotics that didn't help I need to see if these tablets help. So losing weight and using the app to trace the saturated fats will really help me.

casg01

Wow, reading through these posts, such encouragement. My why is different. I just started with MFP today and I want to remember why. Years ago, I was in high school. I dated a superficial man and he broke up with me because of my weight. I said I would show him. I would show every man (my father, brothers loser ex-boyfriend that called me fat) and I did. I lost it all and then some. Met a man and married. Gained most of it back and he threatened to leave me. I left him and lost it. I dated a few men. One was an alcoholic, and one night he was drunk and mad at me and called me a fat *kitten*. I left him and lost it. Met another man and gained all of it back and then some. The heaviest I have been in my life. He told me I was fat last night. Everything changed. I am so sick of living this way. I am so sick of society dictating to me that my weight is everything. I am so sick of being called fat by every man I have had in my life. I know I can do this. I have done it before. I am in pain but I needed that as a wake up call. Our relationship is over and this will keep playing over and over in my life until I choose to do something about it. take control. I know that this is my why now. I know that this will not be my why in the future. I need to get healthy and be around for my children. I have a long way to go, I have a lot of desire and motivation, I will get this under control once and for all.

AshleyAnn9

I had just gone through a really bad break up and I was feeling really unhappy about myself. So I decided I was gonna take the time to focus on myself. It kind of fueled my drive because I was in the mindset of 'oh you'll see what you're missing'. Along the way I gained so much confidence. Two years later: a healthier me and a healthy/happy relationship.

flabassmcgee

It seems like every single time I'd get a good steak going, some Big Thing would happen in my life and made it difficult to keep going. Last year was rough... Went through about 5 different jobs, fixed up and moved into a house, went through a lot with family and my father's suicide attempt, started and stopped school...The list of excuses are long and unpleasant, but it's hard to focus on yourself and your needs when so much is going on around you that needs your attention.

Things are more stable now. But going from retail to a sit down job plus being diagnosed with hypothyroidism and gaining a whole mess of weight hasn't helped my cause.

My WHY is the same as the beginning. I just think now I can apply what I know and DO IT.

Vanilla_Lattes

I want to live longer and be a role model for my kids.
I'd also like to cosplay

PeachyCarol

My why is pretty simple. About ten years ago after the birth of my son, I developed fibromyalgia. I sort of let it defeat me. I became very depressed and made some very poor choices in the depths of that depression because my whole life changed and I wasn't ME any more. I was less active (I had never exercised and I was overweight, but not by much), and couldn't be the same type of mother to my kids that I had been.

Life went on and my family adjusted to our new normal, but the scars remained, but I had put on a great deal of weight. Then, well... my thyroid tanked, I put on more weight, 2 deaths hit our family and I developed psoriatic arthritis and I just couldn't. I couldn't let another medical condition defeat me again. That diagnosis was my wake up call.

By the time I was diagnosed, I was walking with a cane. And that's how I started exercising. By taking walks with a cane. I've moved on from that. About 3 months after I started exercising, I joined a gym, and someone recommended MFP and I discovered just how pathetic my own attempts to watch my intake were. I know that exercise and a smaller body will help me keep ahead of my medical conditions and keep me out of ever being in the state I was before.

getalife9353

A very thought provoking question: "Why?". I am in my mid 50's, I woke up one day and realized that I am 60+ pounds overweight. I have no medical issues, no food allergies, or anything like that. There is no reason I am this weight, other then I let it happen. I am not married and do not have children. All of my "why's" are all about me! I have not thought about why I let this happen, but I will list some "why" I will change this:

• To look, feel and be healthier. Why not?
We only have one body, it's not like we can run to human body parts store and get a replacement part and fix it immediately. I need to maintain the one body that I have. I maintain my car better then I maintain my body. That is ridiculous.

• I would like to live to an active, ripe old age without the health problems associated with being overweight / obese.
I want to be active until the end of my life. I don't want to be old and setting around remembering the good times. I want to live the good times right up to the end of my time.

• Eliminate Obstructive Sleep Apnea and the CPAP machine that I use to treat it.

• So I can better do the things I enjoy doing in life and not be a safety hazard to myself and other participants.
(Diving, Cycling, Kayaking, Hiking and maybe one day running and climbing.)

• I am embarrassed by my body.
I want to be indifferent about my body. It should not be something that I have a reason to give thought to.

Thank you for making me think about "why?". I am sure it will help keep me motivated and focused throughout this journey.

sheepotato

My why has changed in the past few months, for years it's been about me. My struggles, my recovery, my choices. It's not anymore.

I was raised in households by women who loathed themselves and were always willing to go to extreme and desperate measures to lose weight, but never willing to follow or even attempt the healthy path. They make disparaging remarks to about themselves and others. While it's not uncommon for someone to make a comment about a toddler or a young child's 'fat little thighs or giant butt.' However it's not really the norm to let those sort of comment continue far into their teens and then on adulthood. I am in my 30's now and I am still greeted with a weekly reminder during my visits of my flaws and downfalls.

I don't blame my family for making me the way I am, I did that and I own up to my mistakes. I only credit them with making me feel the way I did. It took a lot for me to learn to not be hurt by hurtful things from the ones I love. It was difficult batting with anorexia in my teens when my primary caregiver encouraged it. I can not and do not blame her, because I genuinely believe she was too blinded by her own pain and the toxic environment her own mother created for her and she reproduced for her daughters and granddaughters.

Now I look at the (preventable and self-inflicted) suffering they are going through and I make a promise to myself. I will not allow my own daughter to grow up in an environment like I did and they did. I will make the right choices even if they are not the easy ones, because I want to live by example for her. I will not let her get to the level of shame and desperation that I've witness in my family. I want so much more for her.

I am so thankful each day that she choose to wait to come into my life after I was at a point where I was finally able to love and respect myself. She is my why.

Jelaan

While not in the ballpark of the wonderful people above, I need to preserve what I have. I have always been physically active and slim. I got my black belt at 52, and was looking forward to continuing. Unfortunately my arthritis kicked in big time. My feet have deteriorated to the point where I need a joint fusion soon or I am faced with having problems walking, but I am facing a 2 year wait for an appointment to see someone who does feet here in Ontario, and a longer wait for an op. I now have it in both hands and have problems picking small objects up. Ihave hip pain from it, and problems with my right shoulder from it. Controlling my weight and staying active allows me to stay fit and active. I am stubborn and continue to run, and I am in love with lifting weights with my sons as work out partners. I can see my future but I am fighting it, and loving the fight. Stay positive all you wonderful peeps!!!!!

edited to add thanks to the op for starting this thread, and to all who have posted for their inspiration.

MikePXstream

Such wonderful and rejuvenating responses to what would seem to be an easy question. But as the many of you have discovered, it is not that easy of one. Continue to fight on. Harness your why, think about how good it will feel to accomplish your goals. Tie those emotions to your why and let it drive you. I look forward to reading how your journeys continue. as always, please feel free to add me as a friend.

acquilla30

My why starts with why I became fat. I was raped and found comfort in food and than found comfort in being fat because no one noticed me and I could hide behind it. I realized the only way to stop being a victim is to stop hiding. I also had a bad hospital experience: I had a million gallstones that had backed into my liver and I couldn't keep food down and I was in severe pain. The surgeon didn't want to remove my gallbladder because I was too fat, even though two doctors, one a liver specialist begged her to do it. It took her five days and me threatening to go to another hospital for her to do it. I never want to experience that again.
My last why is my son at 12 is now overweight and I want to set a good example for him. I don't want him to go through his childhood and adulthood overweight and making bad food choices.

ThePoeToaster

If I don't get healthy, I'll die. How's that for a "why"?