Any child free peeps on MFP?

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Replies

  • YesIAm17
    YesIAm17 Posts: 817 Member
    I planned on being child free by choice, but then it just happened. I was young. But I'm glad I was young because now I'm 36 and almost empty nesting, it's nice to have a house sitter/pet sitter when I go on vacation without having to hire one! lol

    I tell him all the time I had him just so I would have a free maid now that he is a teenager. (half joking)

    My boyfriend is strictly child free by choice, thinks babies are horrible parasites and the world is far too overpopulated and hopes for a massive catastrophe that leaves a clean slate, just the animals to inherit the planet.

    So your boyfriend hopes that you, him, your son, and everyone you know and love dies a horrific death?

    I wonder what a psychologist would say that that tells us about him? And what it tells us about anyone who would choose to be with him knowing that about him, and to expose their impressionable teenage child to him?

    I feel bad for your son :(

    I think her boyfriend is probably referring to something like the biblical flood. Sometimes I think this planet needs a fresh start as well.

    "leaves a clean slate, just the animals to inherit the planet. " <--- Think that is pretty clear and not at all what the bible says. Boyfriend doesn't seem to be referencing the bible or anything like it at all, just hoping for massive widespread death and destruction that leaves no humans. At least based on OPs paraphrasing.

    I just reread her comment and she didn't say it like that. And I was referencing the flood as an example. Quit being a douche.

    Haha, ok... guess she didn't say the exact words I quoted and bolded... guess the words themselves don't mean what the dictionary says they do....... that or maybe I just struck a nerve pointing out the implications of such statements since you responded that you "think this planet needs a fresh start as well. ".
  • Skinny_Mocha
    Skinny_Mocha Posts: 208 Member
    Great thread - thanks for starting this. I had no idea there were so many like minded folks out there. I am currently surrounded by friends and family who are actively, purposely, procreating. I have to keep making younger friends to avoid baby prattle.

    I don't know where you live, but I know in NJ and PA there are childfree groups. There's one called No Kidding, which I think spans an area if not all of the US with local chapters. If you have access to MeetUp, that site might have a childfree group, or you could start one of your own. I started a MeetUp group a couple of years ago for couples that were 30+. We have a great core group of members who get together for hikes, dinners, happy hours, etc., and more stuff seems to happen outside of the official group than through the group.

    Thanks for the tip! I'm in Chicago, and just looked some up on Meet Up.
  • dakotababy
    dakotababy Posts: 2,407 Member
    Someone once told me that children are like "farts".

    Other peoples are disgusting and you want to stay away from them...far away.

    Your own are not that bad.
  • rljohnsufl
    rljohnsufl Posts: 48
    I'm child-free, 36, and happily married. I used to think I wanted children but once it became a real prospect, I panicked and couldn't get back on the pill fast enough.

    I have one kitty and am fostering a pregnant cat for a local rescue. I like to think I do have maternal urges, just towards kittens rather than babies.

    Also lots of addiction and mental illness in my family. I think it's better than my line ends with me. ;)
  • daffodilsoup
    daffodilsoup Posts: 1,972 Member
    Engaged and happily childfree. I kind of like some kids - but then again, I kind of like some llamas too. It doesn't mean I want to own one and be responsible for it.
  • 47Jacqueline
    47Jacqueline Posts: 6,993 Member
    No kiddies. I'm 67 and never wanted kids. I write a blog about childfree women. You can read it at http://www.audacious-aging.coom
  • 47Jacqueline
    47Jacqueline Posts: 6,993 Member
    Great thread - thanks for starting this. I had no idea there were so many like minded folks out there. I am currently surrounded by friends and family who are actively, purposely, procreating. I have to keep making younger friends to avoid baby prattle.

    I don't know where you live, but I know in NJ and PA there are childfree groups. There's one called No Kidding, which I think spans an area if not all of the US with local chapters. If you have access to MeetUp, that site might have a childfree group, or you could start one of your own. I started a MeetUp group a couple of years ago for couples that were 30+. We have a great core group of members who get together for hikes, dinners, happy hours, etc., and more stuff seems to happen outside of the official group than through the group.

    Thanks for the tip! I'm in Chicago, and just looked some up on Meet Up.

    I just joined a meet-up in manhattan for childfree people.

    How about making friends with older peeps who have already decided to be childfree?
  • Laka615
    Laka615 Posts: 157 Member
    No kids but I do love my niece and nephew!
  • Skinny_Mocha
    Skinny_Mocha Posts: 208 Member
    Great thread - thanks for starting this. I had no idea there were so many like minded folks out there. I am currently surrounded by friends and family who are actively, purposely, procreating. I have to keep making younger friends to avoid baby prattle.

    I don't know where you live, but I know in NJ and PA there are childfree groups. There's one called No Kidding, which I think spans an area if not all of the US with local chapters. If you have access to MeetUp, that site might have a childfree group, or you could start one of your own. I started a MeetUp group a couple of years ago for couples that were 30+. We have a great core group of members who get together for hikes, dinners, happy hours, etc., and more stuff seems to happen outside of the official group than through the group.

    Thanks for the tip! I'm in Chicago, and just looked some up on Meet Up.

    I just joined a meet-up in manhattan for childfree people.

    How about making friends with older peeps who have already decided to be childfree?

    I don't know any currently :( I don't care about age at all, but I'm friends with very few child free people these days. I saw some promising groups on Meet Up though, so there's hope!
  • itsjustdawn
    itsjustdawn Posts: 1,073 Member

    i don't go around turning my nose up at those who choose to reproduce (ok, a little: you have 4 kids? great: how many are adopted/fostered?? oh, you're just making more? :smh:). i know that i am in the minority. i know that reproducing is a basic human drive that is incredibly instinctual and fundamental to the human experience. not wanting to reproduce makes me the weird one. i'm okay with that. i'm weird for a lot of other reasons too, so i'm accustomed to the feeling. i also know that humans tend toward uncharitable judgment on things they don't understand, and weird minority incliniations are generally not well understood. i expect to get flak for not following the status quo, and i'm okay with that. humans are goofy critters.

    Are you kidding me? These aren't pets we're talking about here.

    1 adult + 1 adult = 2 people. you may make 2 people to replace those when they inevitably wear out. need more people in your family? adopt and/or foster. 2 ppl making >2 ppl is selfish when parentless children continue to suffer and the world is running of clean air and water. IMHO.

    So you don't want people judging you for not wanting to reproduce, but you're judging others for choosing to have biological children over fostering or adoption. They're not the same. Not even a little. When it comes to adoption and fostering, adopting an infant is the closest thing to having a biological child but they're still not at all the same. It costs thousands and thousands of dollars, can require leaving the country multiple times, additional money for prenatal care depending on the situation, and possible heartbreak if the birth mother changes her mind or things fall through for some other reason.

    Adopting or fostering a child isn't even in the same ballpark. You're talking about kids who have been abused, neglected, disappointed, and often act out because of it. No one wanting to be a parent hopes that their kids will grow up to be emotionally stunted and require intensive therapy to be a functional person. If you raise a child who requires it, of course you'll provide that and help them in whatever way you can, but no one intentionally raises a child that way. To suggest that it's selfish for people to have more than 2 kids rather than adopt or foster a child is completely absurd. Just as absurd as suggesting that someone who is "childfree" is selfish for not reproducing, or not fostering, or not adopting. Not everyone is cut out for parenthood and even less are cut out for fostering or adopting a child (not a baby), which is unfortunately why so many fostered kids have such a hard time.

    My parents actually adopted a girl who, by age 2 when we adopted her, had been sexually abused, physically abused, neglected, etc. Unfortunately she turned out to be a mess. And that wreaked havoc on the rest of the family (there were already 3 of us kids) and took its toll on my mom, who was a stay-at-home mom. After this sister tried to kill my other 2 siblings, my mom started sleeping on the hallway floor at night where we 3 had our bedrooms (that sister had her own room and bathroom by the playroom on the other side of the house - which was supposed to be my room cuz I was the oldest). Anyway, I will NEVER adopt because of that. That, and I don't want kids.
  • MelsAuntie
    MelsAuntie Posts: 2,833 Member
    No kiddies. I'm 67 and never wanted kids. I write a blog about childfree women. You can read it at http://www.audacious-aging.coom



    Hola, sister. I'm 65 and never wanted kids either... so I didn't have any. Best decision I ever made.
  • shawmutt
    shawmutt Posts: 74 Member
    I have kids now but hope to be child free some day :laugh:
  • EmGetsFit
    EmGetsFit Posts: 151 Member
    Here! No kids, not now, not ever, no thanks. Very happily childfree by choice!
  • TheNoLeafClover
    TheNoLeafClover Posts: 335 Member
    I don't have children, and have zero desire to ever have them in the future.
  • TKhamvongsa
    TKhamvongsa Posts: 287
    Child free! Lol
  • shmerek
    shmerek Posts: 963 Member
    child free if i don’t include myself
  • VixenArgentum
    VixenArgentum Posts: 91 Member
    Both me and my partner are childfree. Never wanted kids, don't understand the appeal.
  • skcardiog
    skcardiog Posts: 316 Member
    Independent, no dependants .
  • Trechechus
    Trechechus Posts: 2,819 Member
    Just my cat. :)
  • x311Tifa
    x311Tifa Posts: 357 Member
    Currently, I have a furry child: a dog! He's the best walking/running buddy I could as for! Other than that, no kids!! YAY
  • squeepig
    squeepig Posts: 89 Member
    I went through premature menopause at age 30. I thought I had time. :(
  • MrsK20141004
    MrsK20141004 Posts: 489 Member
    I have known since I was a kid that I didn't want to have children. I didn't play "house", I played shopping and travel, seriously. Child-free by choice and loving every minute of it!
  • MrsK20141004
    MrsK20141004 Posts: 489 Member
    My mind is honestly quite boggled by these responses. I guess most people here do not know of "childfree by choice" being a thing?

    it's not the same as just not having kids, or having an empty nest because your children are older now...

    Precisely.
  • EmGetsFit
    EmGetsFit Posts: 151 Member
    My mind is honestly quite boggled by these responses. I guess most people here do not know of "childfree by choice" being a thing?
    it's not the same as just not having kids, or having an empty nest because your children are older now...
    Precisely.
    Right?? You'd think the initial post, and the clarified "by choice" would clue them in, but apparently not...
    It's quite clear: We have made the VOLUNTARY decision not to reproduce.
  • RivasBodilyHarm
    RivasBodilyHarm Posts: 9 Member
    So many child free people is great! Props to you all :) Feel free to add me if you want a no baby buddy!
  • iorahkwano
    iorahkwano Posts: 709 Member
    I'm 25, living in s community where most ppl start having kids 16-18 years old. Every year, I find out more information on pregnancy/labour/childrearing/parent stupidity that drives me further away from ever wanting children.

    Thanks Facebook. And moms who give TMI >__>

    My 64 year old aunt is single & child free, and I must say, I kind of admire her life. She got to be a cop, travel the world, do all kinds of things like take dances classes/karate/swimming & she hangs out with jazz bands. At her age, her body still looks pretty awesome because it hasn't been ruined by children! She can do whatever she wants like br nocturnal, smoke, eat chocolate cake for breakfast or have some beers with friends without any husband or kids asking what's for dinner, where's my sweater or why isn't the house spotless.

    WINNING!
  • agrafina
    agrafina Posts: 128 Member
    No children. Now or ever. Much to my in-laws dismay.
  • MrsLannister
    MrsLannister Posts: 347 Member
    Yep. Child-free by choice. I've known since I was 14 that I did not want kids. Everyone said I would change my mind and "it's different when they're yours." I'm now 38 and still feel the same way.

    Although, if I thought having kids would stop people like the Duggers from ruining more, I might consider it. But, sadly, it doesn't work that way.
  • jenilla1
    jenilla1 Posts: 11,118 Member
    ...to be child free is to make the choice not to have children...

    I thought child free meant you didn't have any kids at all - past, present, or future, either by choice or through nature. Or are the people who didn't choose to be child free but ended up without kids just childless? I'm confused. :ohwell: