what mean/thoughtless comment has been said to you before?

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  • Fab30s
    Fab30s Posts: 157 Member
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    I had finished using the gym and was getting ready to get into sauna. One woman asked, "r u a zebra to have so many stripes." She was referring to the stretch marks on my shoulders and upper back. Her friends laughed. Now I cover up all my 'stripes' at all times
  • jennifer_417
    jennifer_417 Posts: 12,344 Member
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    I asked my husband if I was getting fat and he said yes.

    You asked your husband a question and he answered honestly. I've never understood why women get so mad about this.

    Honestly, I'm with this guy. The guys we are in relationships with are allowed to have feels about how we look.
  • Wonderob
    Wonderob Posts: 1,372 Member
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    If you lost some weight, you could get the guy you want.

    Guess what? 40 pounds makes a difference. I got the guy I want! He told me the other day... I never thought you were ugly. I thought you were fat.

    Um, that wouldn't be the guy I wanted. Any guy who thought I wasn't worth the time because I was fat isn't worth *my* time.

    I always wonder why it's perfectly acceptable for a woman to say that she prefers tall men, but completely unacceptable for a man to say he prefers slim women???
  • psych101
    psych101 Posts: 1,842 Member
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    If you lost some weight, you could get the guy you want.

    Guess what? 40 pounds makes a difference. I got the guy I want! He told me the other day... I never thought you were ugly. I thought you were fat.

    What a horrible thing to say. He sounds like a douche and I wouldn't want anything to do with someone like that.
  • Myhaloslipped
    Myhaloslipped Posts: 4,317 Member
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    What a horrible thread. I prefer not to relive the ****ty things that have been said to me, or anyone else.



    I'm out
    why comment then? your opinion of my thread was a tad bit rude.keep scrolling if you dont like the thread.

    Because...if you have one foot in yesterday and one foot in tomorrow, then you are pissing all over today. Also, you can't really dictate people's responses to a thread that you made publicly in a forum. He was merely commenting on the fact that dwelling on past negativity won't really aid in your progress. I actually do understand the need to work through past issues, but this comment, in my opinion, presents a healthier perspective on things. Just something to think about. :smile:
  • msbhavesalot
    msbhavesalot Posts: 15
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    "Are you pregnant?"
  • kezzola
    kezzola Posts: 65 Member
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    My 90 year old mother has dementia but every time I see her she makes a comment about how fat I am. Even though I've lost 16 kilos and actually weigh less than her ......... every time I see her out come the fat remarks. I know she doesn't mean it and that her "brain filter" is gone, but it still hurts.
  • Myhaloslipped
    Myhaloslipped Posts: 4,317 Member
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    "Are you pregnant?"

    My friend once innocently asked a woman when her baby was due, and she was not pregnant. Then he attempted to make a joke about having permanent "foot in mouth" syndrome, which only made things more awkward. I have found that it is best not to ask women this question unless you know for a fact that they are pregnant.
  • msbhavesalot
    msbhavesalot Posts: 15
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    "Are you pregnant?"

    My friend once innocently asked a woman when her baby was due, and she was not pregnant. Then he attempted to make a joke about having permanent "foot in mouth" syndrome, which only made things more awkward. I have found that it is best not to ask women this question unless you know for a fact that they are pregnant.

    I couldn't agree more.
  • cassidyamymommy
    cassidyamymommy Posts: 71 Member
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    I dont understand why people get so upset when they get called fat, when they are indeed fat. I am 5'4 and 256 pounds. I know im fat. If someone were to come up to me and say You are fat, I would look at them and say no **** captain obvious. I understand there are more hurtful ways of saying it, but if you are indeed fat, then it is what it is. that being said what go to me was my grandmother. she would always say something about my weight and me eating, which never really bothered me until i actually tried to lose weight, and then it pissed me off. she knew that i was trying. i was passed a box of chocolates and took one and was about to pass it on when she said, better take the box away from her before she eats them all. it pissed me off because she knew damn well that i had been trying to lose weight. at that point i had lost 15 pounds and was feeling good about it.
  • Wonderob
    Wonderob Posts: 1,372 Member
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    I dont understand why people get so upset when they get called fat, when they are indeed fat.

    Being fat is seen as a flaw and it's hurtful and rude to point that out to someone - doesn't make it any easier that they are probably more aware of it than anyone.

    You wouldn't tell someone that they had a big nose, or crooked eyes or bad teeth, just as you shouldn't tell then that they are fat!

    However..... If you are put on the spot as per some suggestions on here. i.e "Do you think I'm fat?" Then that's a different matter I guess
  • SunofaBeach14
    SunofaBeach14 Posts: 4,899 Member
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    I dont understand why people get so upset when they get called fat, when they are indeed fat. I am 5'4 and 256 pounds. I know im fat. If someone were to come up to me and say You are fat, I would look at them and say no **** captain obvious. I understand there are more hurtful ways of saying it, but if you are indeed fat, then it is what it is. that being said what go to me was my grandmother. she would always say something about my weight and me eating, which never really bothered me until i actually tried to lose weight, and then it pissed me off. she knew that i was trying. i was passed a box of chocolates and took one and was about to pass it on when she said, better take the box away from her before she eats them all. it pissed me off because she knew damn well that i had been trying to lose weight. at that point i had lost 15 pounds and was feeling good about it.

    Some people are more sensitive than others about certain issues. That's why it's best to hold one's tongue around strangers and mixed company and, on the other hand, to not internalize what other people say.
  • shartran
    shartran Posts: 304 Member
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    When I was about 13-14 years old, I was vacationing on a beach, where I over heard two teenage boys whom I thought were kind-of 'cute' say: "Here comes thunder thighs!" - referring to me.

    Hence, my ED began....and has been with me until now (I'm 47!)
  • Rocky791
    Rocky791 Posts: 52 Member
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    What comes out of other people's mouths always has more to do with them and the filter they see the world thru than it ever does with you. But I'm still shocked at some of these stories.

    This is very true and I try to remind myself of that when the thoughtless and rude comments come my way.
  • pensierobello
    pensierobello Posts: 285 Member
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    'Oh look, a plump girl', from a random old woman when walking down the street, about 15 years ago. Still rankles.

    Some idiot chav girls in a horrible pink stretch limo in Nottingham late one night who rolled down the window to shout 'FAT' at me!

    There are so many others I won't even bother...
  • Alatariel75
    Alatariel75 Posts: 17,959 Member
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    My grandmother (said mid-Summer) - "When the weather cools down, I'll take you clothes shopping. With any luck, you'll have lost some weight by then, so you can buy something nice for once"

    I was a size 12 at the time, lol.
  • EvgeniZyntx
    EvgeniZyntx Posts: 24,208 Member
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    If someone truly loves you, they wouldn't want to change a thing about you. Period.

    Except underwear, change that at least once a week.
  • BunBun85
    BunBun85 Posts: 246 Member
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    Eh, I don't want to memorialize that thoughtless comment on the forums.
  • SunofaBeach14
    SunofaBeach14 Posts: 4,899 Member
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    If someone truly loves you, they wouldn't want to change a thing about you. Period. When I love someone, I love them for everything they are. If they medically obese, I'll tell them that, but either way I'll still find them absolutely freakin attractive, because I love them! All I want is for the person I love to be happy and healthy. If they're not at the weight they should be, health-wise, I'll let them know if they ask, because I care about them and want them to live their longest life possible. But if they're happy the way they are, who am I to stop them?

    To everyone out there trying to lose, gain, or maintain weight, please listen to this: you should be doing this FOR YOU. Not for some girl or guy. Not for your family or friends. Not for anyone else, but you.

    I totally agree. Family and friends should never encourage change because they "wouldn't want to change a thing about you. Period." We should stop pushing our children to work harder in school, stop pushing troubled family members to stop drinking or using drugs, stop pushing husbands and wives to gain/lose weight even if the doctor says so, and definitely stop encouraging husbands and wives to change career paths. :flowerforyou:
  • Rocky791
    Rocky791 Posts: 52 Member
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    Um, that wouldn't be the guy I wanted. Any guy who thought I wasn't worth the time because I was fat isn't worth *my* time.

    The last guy I dated was constantly making comments about women's appearances - either how "hot" some actress was or how some woman "wasn't even attractive". It was the first thing he would say about any woman even if the topic of conversation had nothing to do with appearances. It was a complete turnoff, especially when he made comments about pregnant women's weight gain. I dumped him. No desire to be with someone who views the world that way.

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