OK Ladies...Be HONEST!!

11113151617

Replies

  • CorvusCorax77
    CorvusCorax77 Posts: 2,536 Member
    Getting off fitness gear, why is it women can wear skirts to the office but men can't wear shorts? Is it more professional to see a woman's legs than a man's?

    Probably because it used to be required that women wear skirts in most workplaces and it's just one of those commonly accepted things now.

    Interesting point you make.

    This is kind of what I was driving at before, perhaps poorly. There's a subtle sexualized component to lots of commonly accepted practices. They're so integrated at this point we don't even question them. I'm sure this is true for workout clothes as much as it is office attire.

    Radical feminists are the reason women are even allowed to wear pants, have jobs, own property, or get credit.

    I also think you are confusing two things:

    On one hand, you keep talking about societal gender norms. I would agree with you that these are a problem. Our concepts of "men" and "women" really disadvantage women and men both in a lot of ways.

    On the other hand, you insinuate that women who dress a certain way are wanting attention. This is an epic fail on your part.


    AND I'm out!
  • CorvusCorax77
    CorvusCorax77 Posts: 2,536 Member
    Maybe men should be more discreet like the women.

    I think this is basically what most of the women are saying. A glance here and there, a look and a smile, a nod, fine. Five glances, smiles and nods? Creepy. Leering? Extra creepy. Standing by us while we squat and leering and smiling? Bordering on harassment now.

    Yes, (some) women look too. Just like (some) men don't.

    Yup. Ditto.

    And to be honest, the likelihood of a girl noticing you look at her is minimal if you employ the 3-second rule. A glance doesn't even register and wouldn't warrant a thread with 15 pages of responses. We are talking about more than a glance here.

    If I notice a dude has been looking at me, it's pretty likely he's been looking for too long.

    i "catch" men looking at me all the time. Even *gasp!*men I find incredibly unattractive. Usually they smile and move along. Sometimes they will give me a non-creepy compliment like "you're killing it!" or "you have a beautiful smile!" ...these interactions are fine with me because after they comment a non-creepy comment, they move along.

    The whole "if she finds him attractive" thing bugs me because... well... getting back to how what we thing about sexual harassment informs what we (as a culture) think about rape, women are raped by men they were attracted to all the time. Just because I think someone is cute, doesn't mean I still find him attractive when he is being absolutely repulsive in his behavior. That Elliot Rodgers guy actually looked cute...until he started talking. Total turn off. I wouldn't have gone a date with him either.

    Just something to think about. There is no "freepass" for "cute" guys.
  • taramaclaren
    taramaclaren Posts: 95 Member
    Women are like malfunctioning robots.. they are completely random. They don't like anything, except when they do, and then they are super into it. Except when they're not. Then you can't know, but trust me they do know. They are processing you in their tiny little robot minds, deciding whether to like it or not. Except, again, when they don't want to. Then watch out, cause they made a decision. And you don't know which way things are gonna go, so avert your eyes and back the f*** off, my friend.

    But look if she likes it. Trust me on this, women are super creepy this way. Stare like there's no tomorrow... take a snapshot. A mental, sexy, snapshot.

    That's my best advice.

    ... how did this one fly under the radar? I must have a short circuit in my motherboard....
  • This content has been removed.
  • salladeve
    salladeve Posts: 1,053 Member
    starring and watching every move I make, and following me around the gym... creepy. Just a look and a smile ok and doesn't bother me.

    I would hope that most men know the difference, however it seems to me that the older they get the less they are able to tell the difference. Case in point a man in his 60s at my gym that does not know how to just smile and look away. Every time I encounter him it is creepy.
  • likitisplit
    likitisplit Posts: 9,420 Member
    Women are like malfunctioning robots.. they are completely random. They don't like anything, except when they do, and then they are super into it. Except when they're not. Then you can't know, but trust me they do know. They are processing you in their tiny little robot minds, deciding whether to like it or not. Except, again, when they don't want to. Then watch out, cause they made a decision. And you don't know which way things are gonna go, so avert your eyes and back the f*** off, my friend.

    But look if she likes it. Trust me on this, women are super creepy this way. Stare like there's no tomorrow... take a snapshot. A mental, sexy, snapshot.

    That's my best advice.

    ... how did this one fly under the radar? I must have a short circuit in my motherboard....

    Because it was palpably a troll attempt and unworthy of attention.
  • likitisplit
    likitisplit Posts: 9,420 Member
    Getting off fitness gear, why is it women can wear skirts to the office but men can't wear shorts? Is it more professional to see a woman's legs than a man's?

    Probably because it used to be required that women wear skirts in most workplaces and it's just one of those commonly accepted things now.

    Interesting point you make.

    This is kind of what I was driving at before, perhaps poorly. There's a subtle sexualized component to lots of commonly accepted practices. They're so integrated at this point we don't even question them. I'm sure this is true for workout clothes as much as it is office attire.

    Radical feminists are the reason women are even allowed to wear pants, have jobs, own property, or get credit.

    I also think you are confusing two things:

    On one hand, you keep talking about societal gender norms. I would agree with you that these are a problem. Our concepts of "men" and "women" really disadvantage women and men both in a lot of ways.

    On the other hand, you insinuate that women who dress a certain way are wanting attention. This is an epic fail on your part.


    AND I'm out!

    Like I said earlier. The girl in the sports bra and spandex shorts that are basically panties wants more looks than the girl in sweats and tanktop. The girl at the beach in a thong and ultra tiny top wants more attention then the girl in a two piece. I'm not making a value judgement on them for it just pointing out the obvious.

    So, I can ogle the guy in a speedo but not the guy in trunks?
  • taramaclaren
    taramaclaren Posts: 95 Member
    Maybe men should be more discreet like the women.

    I think this is basically what most of the women are saying. A glance here and there, a look and a smile, a nod, fine. Five glances, smiles and nods? Creepy. Leering? Extra creepy. Standing by us while we squat and leering and smiling? Bordering on harassment now.

    Yes, (some) women look too. Just like (some) men don't.

    Yup. Ditto.

    And to be honest, the likelihood of a girl noticing you look at her is minimal if you employ the 3-second rule. A glance doesn't even register and wouldn't warrant a thread with 15 pages of responses. We are talking about more than a glance here.

    If I notice a dude has been looking at me, it's pretty likely he's been looking for too long.

    i "catch" men looking at me all the time. Even *gasp!*men I find incredibly unattractive. Usually they smile and move along. Sometimes they will give me a non-creepy compliment like "you're killing it!" or "you have a beautiful smile!" ...these interactions are fine with me because after they comment a non-creepy comment, they move along.

    The whole "if she finds him attractive" thing bugs me because... well... getting back to how what we thing about sexual harassment informs what we (as a culture) think about rape, women are raped by men they were attracted to all the time. Just because I think someone is cute, doesn't mean I still find him attractive when he is being absolutely repulsive in his behavior. That Elliot Rodgers guy actually looked cute...until he started talking. Total turn off. I wouldn't have gone a date with him either.

    Just something to think about. There is no "freepass" for "cute" guys.

    Oh no, I fully agree. I don't care if you are attractive or not, I'd prefer not to be oogled at the gym or elsewhere. As a married gal, I am happily squatting away with no interest in any attention - cute guy or not.

    If I see a guy looking at me and not looking away, I don't think he's creepy (unless it is in a parking deck or something), I just would prefer for him to NOT be looking at me. I then clarify the situation with a kind-yet-dismissive smile/nod combo. Typically if a guy is going to approach he will do it then, and if he isn't then we both move along with our happy selves.

    And oh GOSH Elliot Rodgers.... just the worst. Talk about a terrible example of manhood... at least that is one thing everyone can agree on.
  • Lilly_the_Hillbilly
    Lilly_the_Hillbilly Posts: 914 Member
    The only time I belonged to a gym , this was not an issue. Either because - no one gave a fark what anyone else was doing, I didn't pay attention to what was going on around me, or I was something to be avoided. I any case, I have no answer but I wanted to post something.
    There ya go.
  • This content has been removed.
  • sseqwnp
    sseqwnp Posts: 327 Member
    Getting off fitness gear, why is it women can wear skirts to the office but men can't wear shorts? Is it more professional to see a woman's legs than a man's?

    Man up and wear a kilt.
  • PRMinx
    PRMinx Posts: 4,585 Member

    EDIT: also, there was a Speedo thread, and I brought this up here, where most of the women agreed men shouldn't wear a Speedo because it wasn't attractive. So women in tight clothes = comfort. Men in tight clothes = gross?

    Apples and oranges. You are comparing a feeling (comfort) with an aesthetic (gross).
  • TheVirgoddess
    TheVirgoddess Posts: 4,535 Member

    Like I said earlier. The girl in the sports bra and spandex shorts that are basically panties wants more looks than the girl in sweats and tanktop. The girl at the beach in a thong and ultra tiny top wants more attention then the girl in a two piece. I'm not making a value judgement on them for it just pointing out the obvious.

    Seriously? Sigh.

    Most women do not dress for any other reason than comfort and style. I have literally NEVER put a piece of clothing on and thought "I hope I get lots of people staring at me today!". The insinuation that that is even a THING is super insulting.

    Some women feel sexy and confident in a sports bras and spandex shorts - that woman certainly doesn't need to you validate her, gifting her with your "looks".

    Your line of thinking is sexism at its finest. I don't care if you "value judge" them - you're assuming their intent, wants and wishes. You're taking away their ability to own their identity by assigning them one. You've rendered them "the girl that wants more looks" and nothing more.

    You place all the fault on the woman, saying it's what she wants.

    You're part of the problem.
  • thankyou4thevenom
    thankyou4thevenom Posts: 1,581 Member
    Getting off fitness gear, why is it women can wear skirts to the office but men can't wear shorts? Is it more professional to see a woman's legs than a man's?

    Probably because it used to be required that women wear skirts in most workplaces and it's just one of those commonly accepted things now.

    Interesting point you make.

    This is kind of what I was driving at before, perhaps poorly. There's a subtle sexualized component to lots of commonly accepted practices. They're so integrated at this point we don't even question them. I'm sure this is true for workout clothes as much as it is office attire.

    Radical feminists are the reason women are even allowed to wear pants, have jobs, own property, or get credit.

    I also think you are confusing two things:

    On one hand, you keep talking about societal gender norms. I would agree with you that these are a problem. Our concepts of "men" and "women" really disadvantage women and men both in a lot of ways.

    On the other hand, you insinuate that women who dress a certain way are wanting attention. This is an epic fail on your part.


    AND I'm out!

    Like I said earlier. The girl in the sports bra and spandex shorts that are basically panties wants more looks than the girl in sweats and tanktop. The girl at the beach in a thong and ultra tiny top wants more attention then the girl in a two piece. I'm not making a value judgement on them for it just pointing out the obvious.

    And there we go with the girl is dressed in skimpy clothes, she's asking for it.
    *sigh*
  • giggitygoo
    giggitygoo Posts: 1,978 Member
    Interrupting me in the middle of a set may get you a smack. Following me around the gym to stare at my butt while I workout will make me really uncomfortable. Consequence being I will go out of my way to avoid that situation or you in general in the future.

    Casual glances are fine. Saying hello is welcomed.

    Honest to goodness answer? I wouldn't continue to go to the gym in yoga pants and a tank if people looking made me mad.
  • TheVirgoddess
    TheVirgoddess Posts: 4,535 Member

    EDIT: also, there was a Speedo thread, and I brought this up here, where most of the women agreed men shouldn't wear a Speedo because it wasn't attractive. So women in tight clothes = comfort. Men in tight clothes = gross?


    What does one have to do with the other?

    Women think Speedo's are gross = an opinion about a piece of clothing that in no way represents the desires/wants/consent of the person wearing it.

    Men think women dressing in tight clothing = said woman "wanting the looks" they get, so assigning desires/wants/consent to another person based on their clothing.

    See the difference here? You're comparing apples to sheetrock.
  • giggitygoo
    giggitygoo Posts: 1,978 Member

    EDIT: also, there was a Speedo thread, and I brought this up here, where most of the women agreed men shouldn't wear a Speedo because it wasn't attractive. So women in tight clothes = comfort. Men in tight clothes = gross?


    What does one have to do with the other?

    Women think Speedo's are gross = an opinion about a piece of clothing that in no way represents the desires/wants/consent of the person wearing it.

    Men think women dressing in tight clothing = said woman "wanting the looks" they get, so assigning desires/wants/consent to another person based on their clothing.

    See the difference here? You're comparing apples to sheetrock.

    I think the differentiation is that women can wear tight clothes without seeing a clear-as-day outline of their genitals. One of the advantages of having our reproductive organs on the inside :glasses:
  • BusyRaeNOTBusty
    BusyRaeNOTBusty Posts: 7,166 Member
    Getting off fitness gear, why is it women can wear skirts to the office but men can't wear shorts? Is it more professional to see a woman's legs than a man's?

    Probably because it used to be required that women wear skirts in most workplaces and it's just one of those commonly accepted things now.

    Interesting point you make.

    This is kind of what I was driving at before, perhaps poorly. There's a subtle sexualized component to lots of commonly accepted practices. They're so integrated at this point we don't even question them. I'm sure this is true for workout clothes as much as it is office attire.

    Radical feminists are the reason women are even allowed to wear pants, have jobs, own property, or get credit.

    I also think you are confusing two things:

    On one hand, you keep talking about societal gender norms. I would agree with you that these are a problem. Our concepts of "men" and "women" really disadvantage women and men both in a lot of ways.

    On the other hand, you insinuate that women who dress a certain way are wanting attention. This is an epic fail on your part.


    AND I'm out!

    Like I said earlier. The girl in the sports bra and spandex shorts that are basically panties wants more looks than the girl in sweats and tanktop. The girl at the beach in a thong and ultra tiny top wants more attention then the girl in a two piece. I'm not making a value judgement on them for it just pointing out the obvious.

    So, I can ogle the guy in a speedo but not the guy in trunks?

    Both I'm guessing LOL. Guys don't get nearly as much attention so I'm guessing it wouldn't be a big deal.

    EDIT: also, there was a Speedo thread, and I brought this up here, where most of the women agreed men shouldn't wear a Speedo because it wasn't attractive. So women in tight clothes = comfort. Men in tight clothes = gross?

    So if you DO wear a Speedo, are you looking to get more attention? More attention from large men that might have the power and the desire to rape you?
  • busywaterbending
    busywaterbending Posts: 844 Member
    hophead... no.

    unless you are part of my crew who is appreciating my deadlifts because of my gains, or counting out my pullups (16..17..18..19...) you need to put those ear buds in and keep your eyes down.

    Most guys like you are smart enough to train in the am with the senior citizens.
  • likitisplit
    likitisplit Posts: 9,420 Member
    Getting off fitness gear, why is it women can wear skirts to the office but men can't wear shorts? Is it more professional to see a woman's legs than a man's?

    Or why can women wear above the knee skirts but not at-the-knee shorts?
  • TheVirgoddess
    TheVirgoddess Posts: 4,535 Member

    Both I'm guessing LOL. Guys don't get nearly as much attention so I'm guessing it wouldn't be a big deal.

    EDIT: also, there was a Speedo thread, and I brought this up here, where most of the women agreed men shouldn't wear a Speedo because it wasn't attractive. So women in tight clothes = comfort. Men in tight clothes = gross?

    So if you DO wear a Speedo, are you looking to get more attention? More attention from large men that might have the power and the desire to rape you?

    Of course he doesn't want attention. It's all about improving the speed of his laps.
  • likitisplit
    likitisplit Posts: 9,420 Member

    EDIT: also, there was a Speedo thread, and I brought this up here, where most of the women agreed men shouldn't wear a Speedo because it wasn't attractive. So women in tight clothes = comfort. Men in tight clothes = gross?


    What does one have to do with the other?

    Women think Speedo's are gross = an opinion about a piece of clothing that in no way represents the desires/wants/consent of the person wearing it.

    Men think women dressing in tight clothing = said woman "wanting the looks" they get, so assigning desires/wants/consent to another person based on their clothing.

    See the difference here? You're comparing apples to sheetrock.

    I think the differentiation is that women can wear tight clothes without seeing a clear-as-day outline of their genitals. One of the advantages of having our reproductive organs on the inside :glasses:

    Not quite true. Nipples, you know.
  • busywaterbending
    busywaterbending Posts: 844 Member
    Most guys in the gym aren't like that. They just wanna workout and dream about winning the olympics or Olympia,lol. I also have a friend that likes body building and he says that women stare non stop at him. So he puts his hoodie on and music in and keeps his head down. He said in the beginning it was okay but now it gets on his nerves.

    Me, I just wanna not be bothered and workout.

    lol, Z. really? who's not gonna look at the hulk making a comeback? I'm surprised the little wee folk don't go running for the hills when you walk into the gym. The sonic booms from your tire flipping are scary enough, God forbid you flex in front of a dude like the OP, he'd faint.

    Gods of lifting don't even notice when they are being spied upon. Usually our massively impressive lifts and workouts are so intimidating the creep's eyeballs will explode out of their head, causing death, and we Gods will only notice the pile of dead bodies after our workouts are done when we have to step over them to exit the gym.
  • 1HappyTurtleRunner
    1HappyTurtleRunner Posts: 125 Member
    I don't care what you do, just don't interrupt me. Chances are I'm not even paying attention.

    Agreed!
  • likitisplit
    likitisplit Posts: 9,420 Member
    I actually exercise in a bra and panties. In my basement.

    7pm tonight, and I'll leave the shades open a crack, dbmata.
  • dlionsmane
    dlionsmane Posts: 674 Member
    Well since women don't mind answering questions meant for guys...

    If a woman thinks a man is attractive she enjoys the attention. If she does not think he's attractive she doesn't. That simple.

    But for a lot of women time at the gym is just that, time to exercise. Feeling like it's a meat market is an annoyance.

    The quoted bold is what I'm saying.. I believe that's how it works for some, yeah.

    I also think that this (bolded) goes both ways.

    The OP asked "good looking women" for example. But by whose definition? Am I even qualified to answer his question?

    Also I believe it to be true that if a man sees a woman he doesn't find attractive staring he thinks its creepy too (or am I wrong??)

    (Oh and I haven't read any posts after this one so I may be stepping on toes...)
  • notamoment
    notamoment Posts: 190 Member
    If i am in a bad mood and there to hit the crap out of the bag, YES. If it is a normal gym day, IDGAF.
  • likitisplit
    likitisplit Posts: 9,420 Member
    Well since women don't mind answering questions meant for guys...

    If a woman thinks a man is attractive she enjoys the attention. If she does not think he's attractive she doesn't. That simple.

    But for a lot of women time at the gym is just that, time to exercise. Feeling like it's a meat market is an annoyance.

    The quoted bold is what I'm saying.. I believe that's how it works for some, yeah.

    I also think that this (bolded) goes both ways.

    The OP asked "good looking women" for example. But by whose definition? Am I even qualified to answer his question?

    Also I believe it to be true that if a man sees a woman he doesn't find attractive staring he thinks its creepy too (or am I wrong??)

    (Oh and I haven't read any posts after this one so I may be stepping on toes...)

    That's a great response and a point that hasn't been covered. Thank you!
  • naamahgoddess
    naamahgoddess Posts: 14 Member
    I personally don't like it when anyone checks me out a the gym, and that's why I work out at home. I think its annoying. But than again, im not one of those girls running around it tiny shorts and sports bras either. Girls check out girls as well, and I just feel like they are sizing me up, and it pisses me off. When I went to the gym I would rock old band shirts and usually whatever pajamas pants I slept in. On my running days I would wear shorts, and I always got uncomfortable if some guy was on the treadmill behind me because I felt like he was chasing my *kitten*, literally. I love being checked out, don't get me wrong, but I like getting checked out when im like on my walk into work all dressed up in heels and a dress. NOT when im all sweaty and working out.
  • rexroars
    rexroars Posts: 131 Member
    It doesn't bother me to a certain extent. I honestly stare at a LOT of people male or female if they're really in shape because I want to see how they're working out!

    But if you're really obviously giving me that up-and-down look or trying to get me to notice you staring at me, it makes me extremely uncomfortable. It's not even that it's inherently that terrible, but I don't think you understand just how MUCH women get hit on, cat called, etc.

    I am constantly reminded that I am a woman and everyone is very aware and concerned about my looks, 24/7.

    I don't think it's a huge deal if you're being discreet, but you're not giving a woman a compliment by checking her out.