Are you friendly to others while working out?

Most of my exercise happens at a local greenway where people of all shapes and sizes walk/jog/run/ride.

To me it seems like we're all working out together so I smile and nod to almost everyone as to say "Good job! Keep it up!"

I don't actually talk to people because I know that sometimes seems creepy or flirty. lol.

BUT what gets me is that some people seem put off by a smile or nod. Mostly people who are still bigger than me.

I just want to say "I USED TO BE BIGGER I KNOW WHAT YOU ARE GOING THROUGH"...but I don't because then I would seem crazy.

I get the SAME nod or smile from people who are already fit and it gives me encouragement.

I just don't get why some people are put off by people being friendly while working out.

We're all in this together...Aren't we?
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Replies

  • Timshel_
    Timshel_ Posts: 22,834 Member
    Ya have to figure that some people who are overweight, or not where they want to be, saying anything to them might feel like a stark reminder they have a ways to go. I wouldn't take it personal. I like to do the same and say motivational things when I work out on the track. If they respond, cool. If they don't, cool. It is all said with sincerity so maybe over time the smile will sink in.
  • jason_adams
    jason_adams Posts: 187 Member
    I pretty much smile at everyone, all the time, working out / running / walking to work, etc. It's a surprisingly low ratio of smiles out to smiles back across the board.

    If smiling at people make you happy, then just keep doing it. You're doing a good thing, even if people don't smile back.
  • Stage14
    Stage14 Posts: 1,046 Member
    We're all in this together...Aren't we?

    Not really, no. You aren't on my fitness "journey" or "adventure" anymore than I am on yours. We aren't sharing some special bond just because we happen to be running or lifting weights in the same general location.

    I'm not rude to people when I'm working out, but it does annoy me when I'm focused and straining at something and I keep having to break concentration to smile and wave every time I pass someone. I'm also pretty sure that my "oh crap, this sucks. Gotta push through, gotta push through" face is probably not the most friendly face in the world, but it has nothing to do with my weight or the people around me.
  • mustgetmuscles1
    mustgetmuscles1 Posts: 3,346 Member
    On the way into the gym or at the water fountain.
    tumblr_mabj80gscl1qasxjlo1_500.gif

    During the workout.
    hE10CDDC6

    Nothing personal.
  • RyvreTam
    RyvreTam Posts: 45 Member
    I didn't want to be acknowledged, for anything, working out or otherwise. A "good job" sounded patronizing because I just wanted to go unnoticed, doing my thing, not getting in the way of any of you better-than-me people. It was obviously a terrible way of thinking, which I had to find out for myself 50lbs later, but the reality is that people think that way. Encouragement is somehow discouraging because of the awful way people feel and think about themselves.
  • _John_
    _John_ Posts: 8,646 Member
    I'm an extremely friendly person by nature, but yes, if a conversation gets started while working out, I will talk to people during my rest intervals.

    Even as an introvert I'm in my element working out, so I start a lot of conversations at my gym. I know most of the regulars by name.
  • sjbtiger
    sjbtiger Posts: 105 Member
    I workout at my local YMCA, of which I serve on the Board of Directors. So before and after my workout, I'm friendly, social, etc. BUT, while I am working out, I put on my ***** face and get the work done. I completely zone out to others around me. If someone thinks I'm rude, so be it.
  • martinel2099
    martinel2099 Posts: 899 Member
    People at the gym in general are very nice to others while working out I noticed. I was using a squat rack someone else wanted but very nicely I let him know I was almost done. After I was done he said I didn't have to rack it either, so that was nice.

    The only mean people I see are the ones who get upset if you interrupt their circuit by daring to be on the machine they want to use, or the guys who use 5 machines at once and get upset if you take the machine they weren't at for 10 minutes.
  • eganita
    eganita Posts: 501 Member
    When I'm working out, I mean business. I don't even notice other people sometimes... I am focused on my workout and myself. People may think I'm rude or not friendly, but I don't really care.
  • _lyndseybrooke_
    _lyndseybrooke_ Posts: 2,561 Member
    I work out alone behind a closed door, but my husband says I'm mean to him while I work out. I'm annoyed when he interrupts me to ask a question. Like...can you leave the me *kitten* alone for an hour?! Haha, but that's different than what you're talking about. I wouldn't mind if someone smiled at me if I was walking past them, whether they were more or less fit than I am. Some people are just rude and it has nothing to do with whether they're exercising or not.

    Here in the South, pretty much everyone is polite. When I used to walk the local dam, I'd get a lot of hey's and how-are-you's along with smiles. Then again, here people you don't know wave at you as you drive past them. Damn polite *kitten*...

    Quite honestly, I'm glad you don't say things like, "I used to be big, too, and I know what you're going through." That wouldn't make you crazy, that would make you a patronizing jerk.
  • spirit095
    spirit095 Posts: 1,017 Member
    I work out at home in my basement, but I don't let anyone else be in the room with me. I don't need distractions lol.
  • jemhh
    jemhh Posts: 14,261 Member
    I'm not outright surly but I'm not overly friendly while working out. When I run in my neighborhood I try not to make eye contact or acknowledge anybody who I know. I do my strength training at home in the basement in part because I don't want to interact with anybody else while exercising. It's my me time and I'm pretty territorial about it.
  • sculli123
    sculli123 Posts: 1,221 Member
    Nope. Most of the time I work out at my house so there's nobody there except my dogs. But when I work out at a regular gym on occasion, I don't generally talk to anyone either. But I post stuff in between sets. lol
  • Aliciaaah
    Aliciaaah Posts: 379 Member
    The gym I've been going to where I'm currently working is a warehouse type gym. Nearly all guys, lots of boxing bags, most people seem to know each other and know what they're doing.

    For the first three weeks, I'd get a TON of stares while lifting, but no one would really make eye contact, and definitely not say hi! This last week though, nearly every day someone says something encouraging or gives me a little tip or smile or something, which is nice.

    For the most part I keep to myself and just do my thing, so I may seem unapproachable, but as soon as someone does happen to approach me, that demeanor is broken and I break out into a big smile, and conversation if it's appropriate.

    The gym at home though is a more frequented by allllll types of people, beginners to advanced, pure socializers, to cardio bunnies to total meat heads. And so many of them seem so judgmental and weird. People that I've gone to since kindergarten avoid eye contact. But maybe it's just me.
  • BlueBombers
    BlueBombers Posts: 4,064 Member
    I workout in my basement by myself. Pure bliss.
  • Wookinpanub
    Wookinpanub Posts: 635 Member
    Socializing at the gym is for the hot stay at home moms who come to the gym after dropping their kids at school and the gym is something to kill some time and make sure they still look good for their husbands. Also for the muscle meat heads in the weight room who constantly talk about their regimen, supplements and traps.

    Most of others at the gym have jobs and want a workout before we join the rat race and don't need social hour and/or we are hell bent on achieving a goal and not making friends. Although I wouldn't mind making friends with this cutie on the arc trainer.

    PS I see a good friend there just about every morning and we barely say two words to each other.
  • JoRocka
    JoRocka Posts: 17,525 Member
    Very much
    "it depends"

    If I'm doing a HIIT workout or sprints- I have no time to talk- and I will tell you that- sorry no time to talk.
    If I'm in a hurry- I'll say that.
    If I'm just lifting- and I have long sets- I am usually friendly will make idle chit chat as it happens- but I don't usually go out of my way for it. - I'm a very friendly person- and I also for some reason wind up attracting people who want to talk- even if I'm trying to really mind my own business- I always have some body trying to talk to me.

    As for running- if I'm out running- I'm in easy mode- running but observant so I smile or high five people depending on the read of the approach. I often huff out a "hi" to anyone on the street or a nod and smile.

    Socializing at the gym is for the hot stay at home moms who come to the gym after dropping their kids at school and the gym is something to kill some time and make sure they still look good for their husbands. Also for the muscle meat heads in the weight room who constantly talk about their regimen, supplements and traps.

    um.
    no.
    I work 3 jobs- I'm busy as hell- I'm also not a stay at home mom- or any kind of mom... or a muscle meat head- well- if I was any of those things- i'd be a meat head- but I spend 6-10 hours at my gym- socializing in the very minimal of sense of giving a head nod or a fist bump is not something extreme- it's completely normal to acknowledge those people and interact with them.

    People log hundreds of hours in the gym- it's weird to not develop some sort of social relationship with the people there and to completely isolate yourself 100% of the time.
  • TheVirgoddess
    TheVirgoddess Posts: 4,535 Member
    When I run, I'm focused on the ground in front of me. It's my time away from my kids, the dogs, the laundry, etc. I don't want to talk to or look at anyone else. I just want to be in that moment, for me.

    Otherwise, I'm generally a friendly person :)
  • Wookinpanub
    Wookinpanub Posts: 635 Member
    It's my me time and I'm pretty territorial about it.

    True and a very funny way to put it!
  • ashenriver
    ashenriver Posts: 498 Member
    There a difference between being out in the world getting in your exercise and just passing by people to working out in a gym.

    I'm a friendly person and in a gym, I am friendly. I like interacting with people. You just have to make sure you aren't intrusive or they aren't interested in being friendly. There needs to be an opening. Not just a random Hi, how are you? Your doing great comment.

    However I still get weirded out by people saying hi on the streets and trails. But that's just me.
  • alathIN
    alathIN Posts: 142 Member
    I'm in a multi sports group where we do a lot of workouts together. I definitely socialize, joke, etc with these people and they in return because we know each other and there's some group culture about when to chat and when not.

    With strangers, not so much.

    There have been times during triathlons or run events that I've appreciated an encouraging word from a fellow participant.
  • Amitysk
    Amitysk Posts: 705 Member
    For me, it really depends on what I'm doing. If I am taking a walk outside I usually smile and greet everyone I see. If I am doing circuit training/bootcamp we are all usually laughing about something ridiculous (its an all female group and community is a big part of the entire program). If I am at the gym I prefer just to do my own thing and not socialize at all.
  • Grammie4VT
    Grammie4VT Posts: 35 Member
    Keep smiling! It may make someone's day a lot brighter. We never know what is going on in other people's lives and a smile might be just what they need.
  • thavoice
    thavoice Posts: 1,326 Member
    Maybe a simple nod, that would be about it.

    I would want to punch some sanctimonious fit stranger to felt the need to "encourage" me.
  • ariesflame
    ariesflame Posts: 82 Member
    On the way into the gym or at the water fountain.
    tumblr_mabj80gscl1qasxjlo1_500.gif

    During the workout.
    hE10CDDC6

    Nothing personal.

    Yep
  • notamoment
    notamoment Posts: 190 Member
    On the way into the gym or at the water fountain.
    tumblr_mabj80gscl1qasxjlo1_500.gif

    During the workout.
    hE10CDDC6

    Nothing personal.

    Hahahaha true
  • DavPul
    DavPul Posts: 61,406 Member
    friendly while working out? i'm barely friendly while making out. when i'm working out i'm focused on handling my business and have no want or need for attaboys from gym randoms. i'm not saying that what you're doing is a bad thing, but just don't be shocked when people don't greet you with open arms. if you want camaraderie join crossfit or something.
  • Madelinec117
    Madelinec117 Posts: 210 Member
    It depends. If I am doing cardio or water aerobics, I'll smile or waive at people I know or share a few words of encouragement or sympathy for a rough day with the person next to me, or share a laugh with someone. Some of my friends will tease me because I practice breathing exercises with my eyes closed while listening to music on the stationary bike and have no clue to what is going on. If working with weights, everyone usually respects the other person's concentration until they are finished with their set in the gym where I am a member.
  • eslcity
    eslcity Posts: 323 Member
    i'm one of the friendly people at the gym... but because i live in a country obsessed with learning English... I'm often distracted by people wanting to practice on me for free....^__^ so when I workout i actively try to zone people out... but i have found myself working out for 2hours because it takes me that long to do a one hour workout...... :sad:
  • eslcity
    eslcity Posts: 323 Member
    friendly while working out? i'm barely friendly while making out. when i'm working out i'm focused on handling my business and have no want or need for attaboys from gym randoms. i'm not saying that what you're doing is a bad thing, but just don't be shocked when people don't greet you with open arms. if you want camaraderie join crossfit or something.

    ^^ soooo funny... but i can relate to it.