Corrupt a Wish

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Replies

  • runningagainstmyself
    runningagainstmyself Posts: 616 Member
    Granted, but you end up in ER from unrelated complications.

    I wish I could get an appetite to eat dinner so I have the energy to run tonight.
  • zcb94
    zcb94 Posts: 3,678 Member
    I wish I could get an appetite to eat dinner so I have the energy to run tonight.

    Granted! Now you're really hungry, and gonna have to run all over the world to balance out the cals you end up eating. Enjoy your trip!

    I wish college experiences only included facts that I'd use in my calling, not years of garbage like war stories in History.
  • runningagainstmyself
    runningagainstmyself Posts: 616 Member
    I wish I could get an appetite to eat dinner so I have the energy to run tonight.

    Granted! Now you're really hungry, and gonna have to run all over the world to balance out the cals you end up eating. Enjoy your trip!

    I wish college experiences only included facts that I'd use in my calling, not years of garbage like war stories in History.

    Granted! Now you can't escape school due to being a professional student.

    I wish I had money for a culinary travel tour.
  • 5tevenw
    5tevenw Posts: 670
    Granted but this makes you so happy you buy some cocaine to celebrate and can't stop......Now you need to wish for rehab money.



    I wish I had a cupcake.
  • Phoenix__Rising
    Phoenix__Rising Posts: 9,981 Member
    Granted but it's your last meal.


    I wish it were already October.
  • MountainLaurel787
    MountainLaurel787 Posts: 45 Member
    Granted! But you will relive Halloween over and over again until your teeth fall out due to sugar over-load.

    I wish I had a professional chef!
  • neandermagnon
    neandermagnon Posts: 7,436 Member
    Granted. You now have a professional chef. Unfortunately he's a total food snob and rolls his eyes every time you ask him to cook normal dishes, and he acts like the dying swan when you put ketchup on your meal, and he refuses to do your steak the way you like it, it has to be done the way he thinks that kind of steak should be done. And you get so sick of his attitude that you fire him and go back to cooking your own food.

    I wish I could make a fly on the wall documentary about the lives of neanderthals.
  • neandermagnon
    neandermagnon Posts: 7,436 Member
    Granted. Here's a 1971 matchbox toys model of a HemiCuda.

    I wish I could go out for a proper British fish n chips supper right now. On the seafront.
  • 5tevenw
    5tevenw Posts: 670
    Granted but a disgruntled employee jacks off on your meal..... Enjoy


    I wish my car got a hundred miles a gallon.
  • jeets888
    jeets888 Posts: 2,237 Member
    Granted but the cheap dollar/km consumption meant that it put more strain on your engine which overheated and now you dont have a working car anymore

    I wish i could go to vegas!!!
  • accelerashawn
    accelerashawn Posts: 470 Member
    Granted. Unfortunately there is a massive power outage upon your arrival and you are now stuck in the city with no lights, no casinos, and no flights.

    I wish I could reach my fitness goal tomorrow.
  • jeets888
    jeets888 Posts: 2,237 Member
    Granted but now it was too easy and the hard work lessons were not learnt ... you no longer have any other goals so you get lazy and put back the weight plus an extra 20kgs

    I wish i was Bill gates
  • crepes_
    crepes_ Posts: 583 Member
    Granted. You were Bill Gates for a short period, but he was on the toilet the whole time.

    I wish I could fly planes.
  • accelerashawn
    accelerashawn Posts: 470 Member
    Granted...you now have flight simulator plus for windows 95.

    I wish my car had more horsepower
  • crepes_
    crepes_ Posts: 583 Member
    Granted. Now you're late for work because who decides to take a horse drawn carriage on the highway?!

    I wish I could survive very comfortably without sleep.
  • accelerashawn
    accelerashawn Posts: 470 Member
    Granted but in order to survive without sleep you will now need to be plugged in for 1 hour every 8 hours you are awake....no plug...no awake.

    I wish my wife made more money than I did so i could quit and be a stay at home dad.
  • zcb94
    zcb94 Posts: 3,678 Member
    I wish my wife made more money than I did so i could quit and be a stay at home dad.

    Granted, but a loved one of hers died and left the money to her instead, so both of you can quit, but now she's sad about the loss, which stresses you out even more than work did.

    My dumb diet is making me toot every 15 minutes or so, so I wish that would stop!
  • michael1976_ca
    michael1976_ca Posts: 3,488 Member
    My dumb diet is making me toot every 15 minutes or so, so I wish that would stop!

    ok you stop tooting but now your breath is so bad you can't ever open your mouth to talk

    I wish I liked living in the city
  • neandermagnon
    neandermagnon Posts: 7,436 Member
    Granted. You love living in the city so much you can't imagine living anywhere else. But then your company relocates you so you're working in the countryside, and you miss the city so much you become suicidal, but there's no chance of relocating back again.

    I wish I had a pack of dragons that did my bidding.
  • YF92
    YF92 Posts: 2,893 Member
    And you get those dragons, but it turns out they're vegetarian, so they are hunted and killed in a single day.

    I wish the day would extend as long as I need it to
  • neandermagnon
    neandermagnon Posts: 7,436 Member
    Here's a spaceship that can fly almost at the speed of light. Due to special relativity, you can fly at top speed in the spaceship and extend your day as long as you like.

    Unfortunately when you return to Earth, you find that two or three million years on Earth have passed and that humans have gone extinct and the dominant species on earth is now the cockroach. And they've evolved to be human sized, but they are not at all clever, and see you as being tasty food. You live out your days hiding from cockroaches and yearning for human company.

    I wish I could shape-shift and just change myself into various animals or even objects at will.
  • glenmchale
    glenmchale Posts: 1,307 Member
    granted but the only animals you can change into are parasites that live inside the bodies of other animals. the only objects you can change into are surgical dressings.

    i wish to live forever and remain the age i am today
  • amusedmonkey
    amusedmonkey Posts: 10,330 Member
    granted but the only animals you can change into are parasites that live inside the bodies of other animals. the only objects you can change into are surgical dressings.

    i wish to live forever and remain the age i am today

    Granted, but you will have to be trapped in amber forever.

    I wish I could understand and speak all languages of the world.
  • glenmchale
    glenmchale Posts: 1,307 Member
    granted but you never speak the right one to the people you are speaking to, they are spanish you speak urdu, they are german you speak portugese.... etc

    i wish that i could fly
  • 5tevenw
    5tevenw Posts: 670
    Granted even though you can already fly
    proceed to the nearest tall building or
    bridge and check it out........ off you go
    weeeeeeee

    I wish today to be an easy day
  • mikeyrp
    mikeyrp Posts: 1,616 Member
    Wish granted. Now everyone sees you as an easy push over.

    I wish I hadn't eaten that frozen yogurt.
  • amusedmonkey
    amusedmonkey Posts: 10,330 Member
    Granted. Frozen yogurt retracted and replaced with 15 donuts.

    I wish I had super strength.
  • ellantz8
    ellantz8 Posts: 619
    Granted, but unfortunately you chose to eat your body weight in broccoli and unfortunately this resulted in embarrassing gas and stomach cramping. Make better choices tomorrow!
    I wish I had a job I loved!
  • mikeyrp
    mikeyrp Posts: 1,616 Member
    I wish I had a job I loved!...
    Granted.... But after a while your genitals get really sore....


    I wish I didn't have such a dirty mind...
  • ellantz8
    ellantz8 Posts: 619
    I wish I had a job I loved!...
    Granted.... But after a while your genitals get really sore....


    I wish I didn't have such a dirty mind...
    lmbo!
    Granted, you can now only produce "clean" thoughts, developed OCD and spend entire day washing hands!
    I wish I could find some motivation today
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