Just HOW do you deal with INCONSIDERATE partners

oregonzoo
oregonzoo Posts: 4,251 Member
So here's the story. I'm getting married soon blah blah. Super duper pumped. Yay. Stress eating has caused me to gain a few pounds, so I'm reigning in my diet.

And to put it bluntly.. I am $(*%& hungry.

I have my three meals a day and that's what works for me. I have carefully, meticulously shopped so that every meal is just right.

And I get an email today from my fiance. "sorry, I won't want the dinner you were planning on making tonight.... I ate too much at lunch".


REALLY? SO IT'S MY FAULT HE PIGS OUT?
I had a perfectly nice dinner of kale saute and some tofu with bean sprouts.. AND HE WON'T EAT IT.

He told me I can just "call my friends and go for a nice dinner" and he even said he'd pay. But I don't have the calories for it.


What do you do when people are just so rude and won't get with the program.
I thought I had a partner.

I just have somebody who likes ribs and doritos.
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Replies

  • SideSteel
    SideSteel Posts: 11,068 Member
    ....wait for it.....
  • ironanimal
    ironanimal Posts: 5,922 Member
    NO :angry:

    edit: crap that's not the right one

    Ju.. just? Bark? Bark up! Just bark up! Yes.
  • Lisa1971
    Lisa1971 Posts: 3,069 Member
    My husband does this all the time and it doesn't bother me. Sometimes he doesn't get lunch until 3 so then of course he's not hungry. I usually just make him a plate and stick it in the fridge for him to eat whenever. Usually becomes his midnight snack.

    Oh, and no way in hell would he ever eat kal saute and some tofu with bean sprouts! Neither would I for that matter!:laugh:
  • Escloflowne
    Escloflowne Posts: 2,038 Member
    I think you should call it off
  • Mikkimeow
    Mikkimeow Posts: 1,282 Member
    Just break up?
  • Cranquistador
    Cranquistador Posts: 39,744 Member
    NO :angry:

    edit: crap that's not the right one

    Ju.. just? Bark? Bark up! Just bark up! Yes.
    did you just steal my NO?
  • EatAllTheCake
    EatAllTheCake Posts: 32 Member
    I had a perfectly nice dinner of kale saute and some tofu with bean sprouts.. AND HE WON'T EAT

    :sick: I don't blame him, one bit!
  • k8blujay2
    k8blujay2 Posts: 4,941 Member
    finish-him-o.gif
  • HannahLynn91
    HannahLynn91 Posts: 238 Member
    You can't force your new healthy eating habits on your partner.... Sure you would love for him to eat healthy and help motivate you, but if he wants ribs and doritos, more power to him.

    Your doing this FOR YOU. There are going to be a lot of times where your plans and his plans don't line up perfectly... Marriage is about balancing that out so you both are happy doing what you both want to do while still being supportive of each other.

    My husband hates veggies. I make veggies every night. I eat them, and he passes them up politely.

    Just because you are doing something doesn't mean your partner has to do it too.
  • BonecrusherBrews
    BonecrusherBrews Posts: 131 Member
    Drop that hero and get with the zero!
  • redheaddee
    redheaddee Posts: 2,005 Member
    He wouldn't eat KALE TOFU AND SPROUTS?? Oh the horror. Divorce him immediately. He is obviously a poor excuse for a human.

    Or wait....try real food.

    Seriously...Ugh that sounds nasty. Do people really eat that?
  • k8blujay2
    k8blujay2 Posts: 4,941 Member
    See if he can't comply it's just not worth it.

    jazz-thrown-out-o.gif
  • _Pseudonymous_
    _Pseudonymous_ Posts: 1,671 Member
    beat him into submission?
  • kcmcd
    kcmcd Posts: 239 Member
    This is only a problem if you let it be a problem.

    I kind of think that was nice and considerate, him telling you in advance that he won't be hungry at dinner. I've made lots of dinners that my husband wasn't hungry for. But even still... that's not a problem. It gets eaten for lunch the next day.
  • MysteriousMerlin
    MysteriousMerlin Posts: 2,270 Member
    I like ribs and doritos...

    OMG, AM I THE INCONSIDERATE ONE IN MY RELATIONSHIP!?
  • SonicDeathMonkey80
    SonicDeathMonkey80 Posts: 4,489 Member
    Well if there's ever been a first world problem, this is certainly it
  • MegE_N
    MegE_N Posts: 245 Member
    My fiance and I are having some trouble striking a balance. I count calories via MFP, he just wings it. And he's lost almost as much as me (but I'm still winning mwhahaha!)

    That balance is a pain though. All the veg I like he hates, and the other way around. But we want to be able to enjoy our meals, so a lot of times we'll settle on a main course. Fish, for example. We'll both eat a bit of fish. But he wants salad with ranch dressing as a side, but I can't afford it in my calories. So I sautee mushrooms for myself, and skip the salad.

    It's worked pretty well for us thus far. It's a bit more work for whoever is cooking dinner to make that extra side, but we manage.
  • kaseyr1505
    kaseyr1505 Posts: 624 Member
    If my husband doesn't eat what I planned/cooked, I make less of it, and have leftovers, then he eats whatever or doesn't. I don't think it's a big deal.
  • brower47
    brower47 Posts: 16,356 Member
    :laugh:
  • ironanimal
    ironanimal Posts: 5,922 Member
    NO :angry:

    edit: crap that's not the right one

    Ju.. just? Bark? Bark up! Just bark up! Yes.
    did you just steal my NO?
    NO :noway:

    edit: balls I did it again
  • missdibs1
    missdibs1 Posts: 1,092 Member
    Baby girl

    take a step back and look again

    Your man
    A) took time from his lunch hour to talk to you(and therefore was thinking of you)

    B) He is comfortable enough with you to tease you (pull your tail)

    and C) He knows better than to pig out inf ron of you (semi supportive for wedding of awesomeness)

    you should feel lucky
  • SunofaBeach14
    SunofaBeach14 Posts: 4,899 Member
    Tofu and bean sprouts? Are you trying to kill him?
  • cwolfman13
    cwolfman13 Posts: 41,865 Member
    Even when I was dieting and trying to lose weight I wouldn't eat kale and bean sprout whatevers...

    Anywhoooo....you're the one on a diet, not him. You can't expect the people around you to just go along with YOUR program because you're doing it, partner or not. When I was dieting to lose weight, my wife wasn't...I didn't view that as being inconsiderate, it just was what it was and it was difficult because I was trying to lose weight and she was on a bulk...so I was eating none of the foodz while she was eating all of the foodz...that's just how it is sometimes.
  • jlapey
    jlapey Posts: 1,850 Member
    So what? You can't make and eat dinner if he doesn't join you? Co-dependent much?

    Seriously, just do what you planned and don't worry about him. He took care of himself as most adults are capable of doing.
  • mimismommy11
    mimismommy11 Posts: 80 Member
    He likes ribs and Doritos and you're trying to feed him tofu with kale and sprouts, so there's your problem. You can't force your lifestyle on other people, it just doesn't work. I can picture the look on my husband's face if I told him that I was making that for dinner. :sick:
  • bourbon
  • _Zardoz_
    _Zardoz_ Posts: 3,987 Member
    I had a perfectly nice dinner of kale saute and some tofu with bean sprouts.. AND HE WON'T EAT IT.
    Changed my mind couldn't say it
  • mimismommy11
    mimismommy11 Posts: 80 Member
    And I'm sorry, that doesn't make him inconsiderate. It sounds like he was trying not to hurt your feelings because he didn't want to eat what you had planned for dinner. That's pretty considerate in my book.
  • CindyMarcuzAdams
    CindyMarcuzAdams Posts: 4,007 Member
    You are lucky he sent you an email. He could have shown up after work and told you once it all has been cooked and ready for dinner. Just cook enough for you or cook it all and you have the left overs tomorrow.
    Did he know what was planned for dinner. Maybe its his way to tell you to cook real food without hurting your feelings.
    Maybe he really just did have a late llunch and it truely full...
  • SonicDeathMonkey80
    SonicDeathMonkey80 Posts: 4,489 Member
    So here's the story. I'm getting married soon blah blah. Super duper pumped. Yay. Stress eating has caused me to gain a few pounds, so I'm reigning in my diet.

    And to put it bluntly.. I am $(*%& hungry.

    I have my three meals a day and that's what works for me. I have carefully, meticulously shopped so that every meal is just right.

    And I get an email today from my fiance. "sorry, I won't want the dinner you were planning on making tonight.... I ate too much at lunch".


    REALLY? SO IT'S MY FAULT HE PIGS OUT?
    I had a perfectly nice dinner of kale saute and some tofu with bean sprouts.. AND HE WON'T EAT IT.

    He told me I can just "call my friends and go for a nice dinner" and he even said he'd pay. But I don't have the calories for it.


    What do you do when people are just so rude and won't get with the program.
    I thought I had a partner.

    I just have somebody who likes ribs and doritos.

    Meanwhile, I'm curious as to how your guy deals with a control freak OCD (probably by eating big lunches often lol)