Why are people so hateful??

likitisplit

It's not bullying if it's a situation where an adult can walk away without real life consequences.

That is probably the most direct and succient definition of bullying I've ever seen. Well done.

Yeah, being bullied is when you are in a situation you cannot walk away from without consequence and you are bein coerced.

That does not exist here.

Good thing the authorities don't view the definition of bullying as "a situation you cannot walk away from without consequence."

According to this site, adults can't be the victim of cyberbullying at all. They can be guilty of cyberharrassment, but only if they "repeatedly harass or threaten someone online."

https://www.wiredsafety.org/subjects/cyberbullying.php

I wouldn't consider any of the exchanges that have been discussed in this thread to fall under that guideline.

Can people be jerks? Sure. Are people on this website regularly "repeatedly harassing and threatening" other members? Not in my opinion. I'm not going to say it's never happened. But it certainly isn't common. And like Pikaknight said, there are moderators here who deal with that sort of thing.

Adults CAN be a victim of cyberbullying.

http://www.overcomebullying.org/cyberbullying.html

That website is hilarious!

Wait...it's serious?

Oh...ummmm...ok...

No, seriously. I googled her name, found the blog that she was talking about. It's disgusting.

However, as an adult, I think that she's able to move on with her life, even in the face of defamation and extortion.

FatFreeFrolicking

It's not bullying if it's a situation where an adult can walk away without real life consequences.

That is probably the most direct and succient definition of bullying I've ever seen. Well done.

Yeah, being bullied is when you are in a situation you cannot walk away from without consequence and you are bein coerced.

That does not exist here.

Good thing the authorities don't view the definition of bullying as "a situation you cannot walk away from without consequence."

You are probably thinking about the cases of Facebook bullying that resulted in a couple of suicides.

Let me be clear for you. Those were situations in which people purposefully when after people and in ways above and beyond being mean. That is not the same as calling someone stupid, refuting their arguments, etc. To draw a parallel for MFP, a person would need to constantly follow a person around the forums, message them constantly, and circumvent any ignoring/blocking that the "bullied" user put in place.

Actually, I was talking about bullying in general. Not what happens on Facebook or Twitter or whatever other social media sites people use these days.

And that's not the "bullying" I'm referring to.

Then by all means, quit being vague and spit it out so it can be addressed.

I totally agree with wheird here. Vague talk is bullsh1t if you ask me. Just let it all out or make it water under the bridge; passive-aggressive blargh is so not my favourite way of communicating.

You're not entitled to knowing everything. You don't need to know. You weren't in the thread or a recipient of the personal messages. Therefore, you didn't experience it and it doesn't apply to or concern you.

Then you shouldn't be bringing it up.

I don't agree with what I understand to have happened and I would have taken steps to have made it stop if I'd been a witness, but this is unnecessary drama.

Plenty of steps have been taken. Like I said before, no mod is taking care of it by banning his IP address.

AglaeaC

It's not bullying if it's a situation where an adult can walk away without real life consequences.

That is probably the most direct and succient definition of bullying I've ever seen. Well done.

Yeah, being bullied is when you are in a situation you cannot walk away from without consequence and you are bein coerced.

That does not exist here.

Good thing the authorities don't view the definition of bullying as "a situation you cannot walk away from without consequence."

You are probably thinking about the cases of Facebook bullying that resulted in a couple of suicides.

Let me be clear for you. Those were situations in which people purposefully when after people and in ways above and beyond being mean. That is not the same as calling someone stupid, refuting their arguments, etc. To draw a parallel for MFP, a person would need to constantly follow a person around the forums, message them constantly, and circumvent any ignoring/blocking that the "bullied" user put in place.

Actually, I was talking about bullying in general. Not what happens on Facebook or Twitter or whatever other social media sites people use these days.

And that's not the "bullying" I'm referring to.

Then by all means, quit being vague and spit it out so it can be addressed.

I totally agree with wheird here. Vague talk is bullsh1t if you ask me. Just let it all out or make it water under the bridge; passive-aggressive blargh is so not my favourite way of communicating.

You're not entitled to knowing everything. You don't need to know. You weren't in the thread or a recipient of the personal messages. Therefore, you didn't experience it and it doesn't apply to or concern you.

Oh good heavens... Chill. I'm not interested in your drama, keep it to yourself.

My point was that people either sort their crap or they leave it behind without bringing it up again. And dealing with it can happen in multiple ways, either out in the open, on a friend list or in private messages, whatever works for you. The toxic part happens when passive-aggressive and/or insinuating comments are dropped like tiny stinking bombs over threads where they don't belong. Adults deal with things and move on. Vague is bullsh1t, it maintains a toxic atmosphere, which is not healthy for the forums.

likitisplit

I've had people jump on an idea I posted in a thread and rip it apart and gif post and "jump" on me.

http://www.myfitnesspal.com/topics/show/1297097-a-simple-thought-on-how-to-set-a-calorie-goal

So what. They didn't like the idea I posted. I explained it, they explained themselves, I got their point and decided to rephrase, we had a good laugh at it and that was that. I really don't see that as "bullying" or "hate"

If I had responded defensively I'm sure I would have gotten pilled on more...again though, that isn't bullying...that is people responding to your responses.

If you are an adult and you are on an internet forum and you claim to have been bullied I have to seriously question how overly sensitive you are.

Looks like you've got some big girl panties there.

A good number of people currently on my friends list got there by destroying one of my posts in an articulate manner.

Hey! I totally agreed with you and that thread and didn't get a friend request!

You should have taken his arguments apart.

likitisplit

It's not bullying if it's a situation where an adult can walk away without real life consequences.

That is probably the most direct and succient definition of bullying I've ever seen. Well done.

Yeah, being bullied is when you are in a situation you cannot walk away from without consequence and you are bein coerced.

That does not exist here.

Good thing the authorities don't view the definition of bullying as "a situation you cannot walk away from without consequence."

You are probably thinking about the cases of Facebook bullying that resulted in a couple of suicides.

Let me be clear for you. Those were situations in which people purposefully when after people and in ways above and beyond being mean. That is not the same as calling someone stupid, refuting their arguments, etc. To draw a parallel for MFP, a person would need to constantly follow a person around the forums, message them constantly, and circumvent any ignoring/blocking that the "bullied" user put in place.

Actually, I was talking about bullying in general. Not what happens on Facebook or Twitter or whatever other social media sites people use these days.

And that's not the "bullying" I'm referring to.

Then by all means, quit being vague and spit it out so it can be addressed.

I totally agree with wheird here. Vague talk is bullsh1t if you ask me. Just let it all out or make it water under the bridge; passive-aggressive blargh is so not my favourite way of communicating.

You're not entitled to knowing everything. You don't need to know. You weren't in the thread or a recipient of the personal messages. Therefore, you didn't experience it and it doesn't apply to or concern you.

Then you shouldn't be bringing it up.

I don't agree with what I understand to have happened and I would have taken steps to have made it stop if I'd been a witness, but this is unnecessary drama.

Plenty of steps have been taken. Like I said before, no mod is taking care of it by banning his IP address.

Have you PM'd Olivia?

PikaKnight

It's not bullying if it's a situation where an adult can walk away without real life consequences.

That is probably the most direct and succient definition of bullying I've ever seen. Well done.

Yeah, being bullied is when you are in a situation you cannot walk away from without consequence and you are bein coerced.

That does not exist here.

Good thing the authorities don't view the definition of bullying as "a situation you cannot walk away from without consequence."

You are probably thinking about the cases of Facebook bullying that resulted in a couple of suicides.

Let me be clear for you. Those were situations in which people purposefully when after people and in ways above and beyond being mean. That is not the same as calling someone stupid, refuting their arguments, etc. To draw a parallel for MFP, a person would need to constantly follow a person around the forums, message them constantly, and circumvent any ignoring/blocking that the "bullied" user put in place.

Actually, I was talking about bullying in general. Not what happens on Facebook or Twitter or whatever other social media sites people use these days.

And that's not the "bullying" I'm referring to.

Then by all means, quit being vague and spit it out so it can be addressed.

I totally agree with wheird here. Vague talk is bullsh1t if you ask me. Just let it all out or make it water under the bridge; passive-aggressive blargh is so not my favourite way of communicating.

You're not entitled to knowing everything. You don't need to know. You weren't in the thread or a recipient of the personal messages. Therefore, you didn't experience it and it doesn't apply to or concern you.

Then you shouldn't be bringing it up.

I don't agree with what I understand to have happened and I would have taken steps to have made it stop if I'd been a witness, but this is unnecessary drama.

Plenty of steps have been taken. Like I said before, no mod is taking care of it by banning his IP address.

You have no clue what the mods are doing.

Are you just mad he didn't get his account deleted regardless if he's banned from the forums and no longer contacting you?

Let it go. Seriously. You obsessing over it and using it as the victim card is just as bad as what he did.

QueenBishOTUniverse

I've had people jump on an idea I posted in a thread and rip it apart and gif post and "jump" on me.

http://www.myfitnesspal.com/topics/show/1297097-a-simple-thought-on-how-to-set-a-calorie-goal

So what. They didn't like the idea I posted. I explained it, they explained themselves, I got their point and decided to rephrase, we had a good laugh at it and that was that. I really don't see that as "bullying" or "hate"

If I had responded defensively I'm sure I would have gotten pilled on more...again though, that isn't bullying...that is people responding to your responses.

If you are an adult and you are on an internet forum and you claim to have been bullied I have to seriously question how overly sensitive you are.

Looks like you've got some big girl panties there.

A good number of people currently on my friends list got there by destroying one of my posts in an articulate manner.

Hey! I totally agreed with you and that thread and didn't get a friend request!

You should have taken his arguments apart.

Clearly I'm being far too nice, I shall now be a big mean bully.

FatFreeFrolicking

It's not bullying if it's a situation where an adult can walk away without real life consequences.

That is probably the most direct and succient definition of bullying I've ever seen. Well done.

Yeah, being bullied is when you are in a situation you cannot walk away from without consequence and you are bein coerced.

That does not exist here.

Good thing the authorities don't view the definition of bullying as "a situation you cannot walk away from without consequence."

You are probably thinking about the cases of Facebook bullying that resulted in a couple of suicides.

Let me be clear for you. Those were situations in which people purposefully when after people and in ways above and beyond being mean. That is not the same as calling someone stupid, refuting their arguments, etc. To draw a parallel for MFP, a person would need to constantly follow a person around the forums, message them constantly, and circumvent any ignoring/blocking that the "bullied" user put in place.

Actually, I was talking about bullying in general. Not what happens on Facebook or Twitter or whatever other social media sites people use these days.

And that's not the "bullying" I'm referring to.

Then by all means, quit being vague and spit it out so it can be addressed.

I totally agree with wheird here. Vague talk is bullsh1t if you ask me. Just let it all out or make it water under the bridge; passive-aggressive blargh is so not my favourite way of communicating.

You're not entitled to knowing everything. You don't need to know. You weren't in the thread or a recipient of the personal messages. Therefore, you didn't experience it and it doesn't apply to or concern you.

Then you shouldn't be bringing it up.

I don't agree with what I understand to have happened and I would have taken steps to have made it stop if I'd been a witness, but this is unnecessary drama.

Plenty of steps have been taken. Like I said before, no mod is taking care of it by banning his IP address.

Have you PM'd Olivia?

Sure have.

DYELB

jenilla1

Why are people so hateful?

Because they're people, and because this is the Internet, they don't have to look you in the eye when they speak to you. Just let it go, OP...:flowerforyou:

Aaron_K123

I've had people jump on an idea I posted in a thread and rip it apart and gif post and "jump" on me.

http://www.myfitnesspal.com/topics/show/1297097-a-simple-thought-on-how-to-set-a-calorie-goal

So what. They didn't like the idea I posted. I explained it, they explained themselves, I got their point and decided to rephrase, we had a good laugh at it and that was that. I really don't see that as "bullying" or "hate"

If I had responded defensively I'm sure I would have gotten pilled on more...again though, that isn't bullying...that is people responding to your responses.

If you are an adult and you are on an internet forum and you claim to have been bullied I have to seriously question how overly sensitive you are.

Looks like you've got some big girl panties there.

A good number of people currently on my friends list got there by destroying one of my posts in an articulate manner.

Hey! I totally agreed with you and that thread and didn't get a friend request!

You should have taken his arguments apart.

Clearly I'm being far too nice, I shall now be a big mean bully.

I also accept a$$kissing

Bry_Fitness70

So over the course of 15 amazing pages in this thread, we have determined that some people aren't nice... that is certainly information that will change lives.

Lyndonbearsmommy

That's the internet for ya. There does seem to be the mindset that there is one way to go about things and if it's challenged, the thread is inundated with negativity. Disagreement is expected, but often people can't seem to be courteous in their disagreement or statements. There are plenty of ways to state facts or opinions without being rude or abrasive, people just don't care to do it that way. Sadly, it's just how people are.

rml_16

I know people who have been actually stalked online and offline by people they met on message boards and I personally have been harassed by people online (on Facebook and I blocked them and problem solved).

I know that terrible things occur and often begin in venues like this one. But what people here usually refer to as "bullying" is simply someone disagreeing with or posting information contradictory to a deeply held belief, especially when that belief goes against all scientific evidence. And then people start posting silly gifs because the thread is ridiculous, anyway, and people call THAT bullying.

Those things are not bullying. 99.9% of what happens in this forum is not bullying or harassment.

AglaeaC

I just wonder who all these "people" are, because none of use seem to want to identify with such an appalling lot of savages.

likitisplit

I just wonder who all these "people" are, because none of use seem to want to identify with such an appalling lot of savages.

They are the people living in their mom's basement.

None of us live in a basement.

Ergo, they are not us.

AglaeaC

I just wonder who all these "people" are, because none of use seem to want to identify with such an appalling lot of savages.

They are the people living in their mom's basement.

None of us live in a basement.

Ergo, they are not us.

:laugh: Razor sharp logic. And that's why we are friends.

Stiang

I just wonder who all these "people" are, because none of use seem to want to identify with such an appalling lot of savages.

They are the people living in their mom's basement.

None of us live in a basement.

Ergo, they are not us.

Basements are nice on hot days and during thunderstorms. Moved my bedroom down there when I was a kid. But there wasn't a thing called the internet back then. :flowerforyou:

QueenBishOTUniverse

I've had people jump on an idea I posted in a thread and rip it apart and gif post and "jump" on me.

http://www.myfitnesspal.com/topics/show/1297097-a-simple-thought-on-how-to-set-a-calorie-goal

So what. They didn't like the idea I posted. I explained it, they explained themselves, I got their point and decided to rephrase, we had a good laugh at it and that was that. I really don't see that as "bullying" or "hate"

If I had responded defensively I'm sure I would have gotten pilled on more...again though, that isn't bullying...that is people responding to your responses.

If you are an adult and you are on an internet forum and you claim to have been bullied I have to seriously question how overly sensitive you are.

Looks like you've got some big girl panties there.

A good number of people currently on my friends list got there by destroying one of my posts in an articulate manner.

Hey! I totally agreed with you and that thread and didn't get a friend request!

You should have taken his arguments apart.

Clearly I'm being far too nice, I shall now be a big mean bully.

I also accept a$$kissing

No good, I have to save that up for potential doctoral advisers.

mtruitt01

an example would be good, instead of just a broad statement ; D

sloth3toes

In.

Michelle_Padgett13

Misunderstandings abound in a text format where you can't see facial expressions or hear vocal inflections. For example, I just had a lady argue with me in the 42 calorie mac & cheese thread after I agreed with her. Maybe I should start my own mean people thread? Hmm, better wait until Friday, I hear that's when the cool mean people threads happen.

Alluminati

Misunderstandings abound in a text format where you can't see facial expressions or hear vocal inflections. For example, I just had a lady argue with me in the 42 calorie mac & cheese thread after I agreed with her. Maybe I should start my own mean people thread? Hmm, better wait until Friday, I hear that's when the cool mean people threads happen.

Can we start a butthurt people thread? Or is that mean?

Michelle_Padgett13

Misunderstandings abound in a text format where you can't see facial expressions or hear vocal inflections. For example, I just had a lady argue with me in the 42 calorie mac & cheese thread after I agreed with her. Maybe I should start my own mean people thread? Hmm, better wait until Friday, I hear that's when the cool mean people threads happen.

Can we start a butthurt people thread? Or is that mean?

I have actually considered this. GET OUT OF MY BRAIN.

Aaron_K123

Misunderstandings abound in a text format where you can't see facial expressions or hear vocal inflections. For example, I just had a lady argue with me in the 42 calorie mac & cheese thread after I agreed with her. Maybe I should start my own mean people thread? Hmm, better wait until Friday, I hear that's when the cool mean people threads happen.

Can we start a butthurt people thread? Or is that mean?

QueenBishOTUniverse

I would be down, but somebody else needs to start it. Even my very best attempt at forum thread creation only made it to four pages.

hookilau

It's not bullying if it's a situation where an adult can walk away without real life consequences.

That is probably the most direct and succient definition of bullying I've ever seen. Well done.

Yeah, being bullied is when you are in a situation you cannot walk away from without consequence and you are bein coerced.

That does not exist here.

Good thing the authorities don't view the definition of bullying as "a situation you cannot walk away from without consequence."

According to this site, adults can't be the victim of cyberbullying at all. They can be guilty of cyberharrassment, but only if they "repeatedly harass or threaten someone online."

https://www.wiredsafety.org/subjects/cyberbullying.php

I wouldn't consider any of the exchanges that have been discussed in this thread to fall under that guideline.

Can people be jerks? Sure. Are people on this website regularly "repeatedly harassing and threatening" other members? Not in my opinion. I'm not going to say it's never happened. But it certainly isn't common. And like Pikaknight said, there are moderators here who deal with that sort of thing.

Adults CAN be a victim of cyberbullying.

http://www.overcomebullying.org/cyberbullying.html

That website is hilarious!

Wait...it's serious?

Oh...ummmm...ok...

No, seriously. I googled her name, found the blog that she was talking about. It's disgusting.

However, as an adult, I think that she's able to move on with her life, even in the face of defamation and extortion.

duuude. :noway: I googled her name too & what a nightmare.

jofjltncb6

Anyone else come in line with some down right hostile threads going on here.....This is supposed to be a place of help and support, not ripping each other to shreds on who is right and wrong. Just because it worked for you doesn't mean it will for someone else and vice versa. Am I alone on this? :grumble:

So is this about people who are actually "mean" or just people who disagree with something and people's feelings are hurt? Because I see a lot of the latter and not that much of the former. (And when there *are* mean people, they're almost always called out and appropriately dealt with.)

Guess I'll just read the 16+ pages to find out.

mtruitt01

I like how people are like "we don't do X around here".

Just because you don't believe in something doesn't mean someone else can't.

They can do anything they want. Just don't come back whining when it doesn't work or you gain it all back.

We're all here counting calories because most of us have failed at these stupid money wasting fads.

AMEN!! DITTO!!

hookilau

whatever.
bring on the cats!