Drunk rant about women

wheird

I am usually too excited and happy that a woman is letting me touch her to feel disappointed when her clothes come off and it looks different

thank you for still being excited after my duct tape comes off

Thank you for looking better without clothes

rml_16

Men don't look at the natural woman.
Women accept the natural man.
It's the way of the world, my friend.

Odd, the best relationship of my life began after I gave up doing all that mess to try to impress them. The most makeup I wear on a regular basis is mascara. I'll add eyeliner on occasion. I don't own spanx or push up bras. I'm with the most amazing man I've ever known, and I get more attention from men now, not less.

What I find the funniest about all these, "Men won't like us natural," posts is that I can trace the beginning of every serious relationship I've ever been in to a night I was out in casual clothing with no makeup because I just simply didn't care that particular evening. Once was because I was moving out of town the next day and certainly wasn't interested in meeting anyone! Ended up getting hit on, staying in town an extra night to go out with him and dated long-distance for an entire year and even got engaged briefly.

I hadn't even fixed my hair!

likitisplit

Anyway, I wish women didn't feel the need to do these things, but you know... if women embraced more natural beauty, society would call them "gross."

That simply isn't true.

The minimum I can get away with at work is blush, foundation, eyeliner, mascara, brow pencil and lip gloss. I start getting social pressure if I leave off the eyeliner.

kelsully

I see nothing dishonest about makeup and bras, but extremes and constant spanx and such until he didn't know the actual shape of her body until the first time he sees her naked is another story.

This is true only to a certain extent...I can put myself in all kinds of shape wear and my basic shape is still my basic shape..just smoothed out... I cannot make myself an hourglass figure with shape wear..I can create illusions that make me look slightly more shapely instead of boyish but still...at the end of the night..my figure is my figure and no one would be surprised that I am a bit square and flat.

tycho_mx

Men used to wear a thing called a codpiece. And wigs. And makeup. That all changed with the industrial revolution. It seems that the fashion industry isn't going to let women customers go as easily. But if you look on the factory floor and even in the exec wing there isn't a lot of war paint going on at work any more. So why it's necessary on dates?

I'm reminded of a friend who was dating this woman and things got to the bedroom, eventually. As he put it, she looked great in clothes but once she took everything off everything else ...just...fell. She went from looking like 35 (which she was) to looking like 60+.

Maybe that's what your male friend was talking about. But then again, most of us do look better in clothes....

Bingo. It's all in social conventions and "fashion". And whatever you do with it. I don't consider it deceptive since I fully understand that people don't wake up with a fully coiffed head and wearing heels. In the same vein, breast implants aren't "fake", they are very real - the person that got them felt strongly enough for them to materialize them that they underwent major surgery. I don't care as long as they are happy, but it does tell me something about the relative importance of some conceptsfor this person.

I don't like skinny jeans - I don't wear skinny jeans. How hard is that? My wife wears a very modest amount of makeup. The previous long-term GF wore lots, and perfume, etc. They both are attractive, they both carried themselves confidently, and their looks was only a part of that.

As for "men have all the luck". Yeah, in some aspects. Try to date successfully with an unattractive job.

rml_16

Anyway, I wish women didn't feel the need to do these things, but you know... if women embraced more natural beauty, society would call them "gross."

That simply isn't true.

The minimum I can get away with at work is blush, foundation, eyeliner, mascara, brow pencil and lip gloss. I start getting social pressure if I leave off the eyeliner.

So the people where you work are jerks. I have never had that experience. I literally have worn makeup to work maybe 10 times total. And I rarely wear it anywhere else. No one has ever called me gross or commented on it in any way.

In fact, I have been several times asked out on dates (by not creepy men) or usually someone -- male or female -- will tell me I have beautiful hair. Those are the only appearance-related events or comments I have ever experienced.

So either I'm especially beautiful, you're especially ugly or your statement is just not true about society as a whole.

meshashesha2012

The question remains - for both sexes - why are you making up your face/body ??

because everyone is entitled to wear whatever they want in order to feel like they look nice and feel comfortable - no matter what that definition of "nice and comfortable" is.

i think the biggest misunderstanding from people who prefer to look more casual (or in some cases extremely casual) when they leave the house about those of who don't is that "OMG it must take so much more time!!" No, it doesnt. it takes me 3 minutes to put my makeup on in the morning (i know because i've even done it at the train station when i had 3 minutes until the next station :laugh: ) and it probably takes me less time getting dressed because i primarily wear dresses which means i dont have to deal with top AND a bottom when getting dressed.

i cant speak for anyone else but i know that I personally dont own any frumpy/schlubby/dumpy clothing. so it's not like i need to run around trying to find something i look good in because everything i have in my closet i look good in. i can just quickly grab something that i happen to look fabulous in (and hello that would be why i bought it in the first place)

of course there are my workout clothes are warm ups, but those are for working out so why would i be wearing those when i'm not on my way to/from a workout anyway?

MsBetteDavis

It's not more directed at women. Women just buy in to more. Most men have no possible hope of achieving the looks, money, etc a male celebrity has but men generally don't get emotional about it. They do their best and move on with life. Women on the other hand tend to take it as some sort of attack that attractive women get put on magazine covers. Seriously, how many ugly guys do you see on the covers of men's fitness magazines?

Oh yeah, I totally get that, which is why I said that it also applies to men, but I do still feel like it is directed at women more often, but it's hard for me not to, since I'm a woman, and I notice this stuff all of the time. But I suppose the same could be said for you, since you're a man, you notice it all the time when it's directed at men.

But either way, I think people should be allowed to look however they want. If a guy wants to wear makeup? Sure. If a girl wants to wear a push up bra? Okay, be my guest.

But back to what the OP said, I still wouldn't call it being deceitful.

WickedPineapple

Anyway, I wish women didn't feel the need to do these things, but you know... if women embraced more natural beauty, society would call them "gross."

That simply isn't true.

The minimum I can get away with at work is blush, foundation, eyeliner, mascara, brow pencil and lip gloss. I start getting social pressure if I leave off the eyeliner.

This is definitely job dependent. I've met the majority of our clients in jeans/t-shirt and possibly dirt on my face. But I do believe that if the majority of women stopped wearing makeup, it wouldn't be demanded anymore because everyone would just get used to it.

MsBetteDavis

This is a complete side note - but in a lot of the topics that can cause some controversy, things get out of control so fast and someone ends up being attacked, or someone takes something completely the wrong way or is a total *kitten*, and I just wanted to comment that it's actually really nice to see people being calm about this and giving their opposing viewpoints yet still being nice about it.

SarahRuthRuns

Anyway, I wish women didn't feel the need to do these things, but you know... if women embraced more natural beauty, society would call them "gross."

That simply isn't true.

The minimum I can get away with at work is blush, foundation, eyeliner, mascara, brow pencil and lip gloss. I start getting social pressure if I leave off the eyeliner.

That's insane.

I'm at work right now in jeans, a sweatshirt, and sneakers. No makeup at all. And I let my hair air dry on my way to work this morning and then just pulled the sides up into a barrette when I got here. This is how I look every day.

I shave, but that's about it. I don't even own makeup, pushup bras or heels. I rarely dye my hair, and when I do it's only to cover grays (I'm starting to get a few...), and it's always the same color or really close to the same.

I don't care what anyone thinks, and I get no pressure from anyone to be any different. My husband likes me the way I am, I am comfortable the way I am, and that's all that matters to me.

ekztawas

I guess I can kind of get where he is coming from. But on the same token, it is relatively obvious when a girl has a bunch of makeup on, 8 inch F-me pumps, and a push up bra. Guys can't honestly think they wake up looking like a $5 hooker, right?

LOL. Yes, it's quite obvious then.

I think as women we're damned if we do and damned if we don't. While I can understand where this man is coming from and how hurt he is, I think he would also complain about dating women who didn't put any effort into their appearance.
Meh, I'm still going to continue wearing makeup, wearing push up bras, and wearing tight jeans. Because I LIKE IT and I've heard no complaints from the men folk.

Bry_Fitness70

Make up and spanx and push up bras and excessive hair styling can be misleading, but can it also be unethical when taken to the extreme?

As a 44 year old, maybe my perspective is different than your coworkers, but my bottom line is: I like when people try. If a woman is taking the time to go through all of these "deceptive" measures to look better, I applaud that. I've seen countless men and women who get married, get extremely comfortable, and quit trying. They quit taking care of themselves, gain weight, the women cut their hair off and quit wearing make-up, and both of them lapse into some sort of creepy androgynous middle-ground of existence that doesn't resemble anything close to the way they were when they first met. So I totally disagree with your drunken coworker - be appreciative that people are trying.

necessaryveganism

The question remains - for both sexes - why are you making up your face/body ??

because everyone is entitled to wear whatever they want in order to feel like they look nice and feel comfortable - no matter what that definition of "nice and comfortable" is.

i think the biggest misunderstanding from people who prefer to look more casual (or in some cases extremely casual) when they leave the house about those of who don't is that "OMG it must take so much more time!!" No, it doesnt. it takes me 3 minutes to put my makeup on in the morning (i know because i've even done it at the train station when i had 3 minutes until the next station :laugh: ) and it probably takes me less time getting dressed because i primarily wear dresses which means i dont have to deal with top AND a bottom when getting dressed.

i cant speak for anyone else but i know that I personally dont own any frumpy/schlubby/dumpy clothing. so it's not like i need to run around trying to find something i look good in because everything i have in my closet i look good in. i can just quickly grab something that i happen to look fabulous in (and hello that would be why i bought it in the first place)

of course there are my workout clothes are warm ups, but those are for working out so why would i be wearing those when i'm not on my way to/from a workout anyway?

Yeah, but then you will deceit all the poor men and trick them into wasting an hour of their super important lives by taking you out on a date before realizing your eyelids aren't naturally sparkly dark blue and black! You evil lying woman!

bugaboo_sue

The question remains - for both sexes - why are you making up your face/body ??

Because I like to look nice. The only time anyone will ever catch me wearing yoga pants is when I am in my house. If I have to go out -- even if I am going to the gym -- I will put on pants and a nice shirt. I feel like a sloppy dirt bag if I go out in yoga pants or even cotton pull-on shorts. My husband and I were going to the gym and I had on a pair of shorts that said CANUN on the back and I was going to change before we left the house because I felt sloppy in them. He convinced me to just wear them (and later I found out it was because they apparently make my butt look good :laugh: ) but I felt sloppy.

I am also not a fan of wearing sneakers with jeans or any pants for that matter again, because I feel sloppy. Even if I am going to the grocery store I will put on a shoe that has some sort of a heel because I think it looks nice.

In all honesty I think too many people out there are comfortable in their yoga pants, sweat pants, sneakers what have you and don't dress up enough. My husband and I always dress up (or look really nice) when we go out. Even when we go to our outdoor summer concerts I will wear a dress and he wears a nice pair of shorts and a nice shirt. Too often when we go out some place nice we see people dressed sloppily. If you're going out to a nice restaurant you should at least make an effort and not just roll out of bed and go out in your pj's.

I also don't wear make up all the time. Usually when I go out but there are plenty of times that even when I'm dressed up I just don't feel like putting on a "full face" and will just do mascara and lip stick. 99.9% of the time during the week I don't wear a bit of make up.

The bottom line is I dress up and wear make up because I like it. I don't like looking like someone who just rolled out of bed and decided to go out for the night.

jenilla1

I rarely use camouflage of any kind, but I don't think that makes me more legit than other women. I'm just cool with me the way I am. My man thinks I look good and there's really no one else I need to impress. I might get a little dressed up for a special occasion, but that doesn't happen often.

T1DCarnivoreRunner

The question remains - for both sexes - why are you making up your face/body ??

because everyone is entitled to wear whatever they want in order to feel like they look nice and feel comfortable - no matter what that definition of "nice and comfortable" is.

i think the biggest misunderstanding from people who prefer to look more casual (or in some cases extremely casual) when they leave the house about those of who don't is that "OMG it must take so much more time!!" No, it doesnt. it takes me 3 minutes to put my makeup on in the morning (i know because i've even done it at the train station when i had 3 minutes until the next station :laugh: ) and it probably takes me less time getting dressed because i primarily wear dresses which means i dont have to deal with top AND a bottom when getting dressed.

i cant speak for anyone else but i know that I personally dont own any frumpy/schlubby/dumpy clothing. so it's not like i need to run around trying to find something i look good in because everything i have in my closet i look good in. i can just quickly grab something that i happen to look fabulous in (and hello that would be why i bought it in the first place)

of course there are my workout clothes are warm ups, but those are for working out so why would i be wearing those when i'm not on my way to/from a workout anyway?

Yeah, but then you will deceit all the poor men and trick them into wasting an hour of their super important lives by taking you out on a date before realizing your eyelids aren't naturally sparkly dark blue and black! You evil lying woman!

Or you could just spend a moment to cuddle with a kitty and take a picture... that is attractive too.

yopeeps025

in terms of push ups bra's being dishonest- I feel like if men didn't put so much stock in how fabulous boobs were- we might not be so obsessed with making them bigger and higher- but that's kind of a chicken or the egg question- we'll never have a good answer.

I totally agree with you here. It's both men and women who place such emphasis on breast size.

I have small breasts, but I've learned to be confident in myself with the help of my boyfriend (who happens to be most attracted to women with slightly bigger butts and smaller breasts, so hooray for me being his perfect woman!), so I don't feel the need to wear a push-up bra, but I feel like most girls aren't so lucky.

He is not the only one who likes that. I DO

jmt08c

in terms of push ups bra's being dishonest- I feel like if men didn't put so much stock in how fabulous boobs were- we might not be so obsessed with making them bigger and higher- but that's kind of a chicken or the egg question- we'll never have a good answer.
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So you DO admit that boobs are fabulous.